Q4W: Have you ever been sexually attracted to a guy who is not good looking?

Kondijote · 2019-06-04T03:24:12+00:00

Yes. Why is this even a question? I was madly in love with a scrawny bald loner 10 years ago, and I have been in love with guys that my gal pals could not understand. Everyone has a different type, and I liked nerds. It baffles me that men here think everyone wants Chad.

Nodoxxintoxin · 2019-06-04T02:37:05+00:00

I‘ve been attracted to plenty of guys who other women found unattractive, but only once thought “he’s not attractive so why do I want to fuck him”, but that’s a long, weird story.....and not typical of anything.

Willow-girl · 2019-06-04T05:19:53+00:00

When I have chemistry with a guy, I tend to find him attractive, even if (objectively) he isn't classically good-looking. He looks good to me! And that's all that matters.

Orange_Paisley · 2019-06-04T03:09:40+00:00

Yes, because that is not what attracts me to men. It isn’t what is conventionally good looking - it is how much of a weirdo he is.

CamoWoobie10000 · 2019-06-04T02:22:15+00:00

The SMV/RMV topic comes up a lot, and I think a lot of the guys here are missing the point that for most women, SMV and physical looks are not as closely tied as they are for men.

When I was in my early 20s I dated this guy who I was SO sexually attracted to. I lusted over him for about a year before we finally got together. He had an ugly face, a skinny body and really bad hair. I'd show my friends his picture and they'd actually grimace. But he was so fucking smooth. As soon as they met him in person they'd understand the attraction. He was wildly sexually attractive, even though he was nothing to look at. I'll also add (because I know guys will claim "emotional attraction") that his RMV was rock bottom. He didn't have a job, lived like a slob, was a player and still years and years on has never commit to a woman.

SabineLavine · 2019-06-04T02:56:55+00:00

I definitely have. I was attracted to his mind, his dark sense of humor, and his confidence. He got all sorts of attractive women and he was not good looking by anyone's standard.

[deleted] · 2019-06-04T03:44:57+00:00

Again it depends on definition of "not good looking". My early 20s when I should have been riding the college football teams cocks, I had a heavily balding in his 20s BF with terrible vampire teeth. He didnt have a great face, wasn't tall, but he was confident and funny, kept in shape as a runner, got braces, cropped his hair really short, and controlled what he could. And he never had issues getting girls, before or after me.

A lot of the incels have the ability to do so much w themselves to become more attractive. It's not even inauthentic, fucking birds literally evolved to peacock by design.

TopOccasion29 · 2019-06-04T04:44:57+00:00

Yes. I have a thing for scent. There's this (probably fake) Ferragamo cologne a lot of mexican/salvadorean dudes in my area that run in the same social circles and it took me SO long to realize that I was literally attracted to a certain guy because of his scent like a werewolf or some shit. I got a cold one week and couldn't smell and suddenly I could see HOLY SHIT he's ugly but just last week I was a puddle around him.

I wouldn't say the guys I like are ugly but a lot of my friends say they are. IDK, once I'm into them I rationalize every part of them as attractive. If they're kinda fat, love it. Big fucking teeth, love it. I love it cause it's part of HIM- whoever it is. Idk women be complicated.

shoup88 · 2019-06-04T08:52:25+00:00

Steve Buscemi - specifically in Reservoir Dogs (and Airheads to an extent). He was funny, cool, professional, and there was something about his physicality I found very attractive. He’s so smirky.

Kondijote · 2019-10-22T13:05:43+00:00

This is what you commented on another thread:

I find big ones really hot, but they can be a bit of a problem when you get down to it. Small ones are a turn off for me.

JFL at your virtue signaling in this post 😂

Texastentialism · 2019-06-04T02:54:10+00:00

My husband isn't really conventionally attractive, and while he has a lot of features I tend to like in guys, he didn't particularly turn my head the night I met him. But the second he opened his mouth to speak to me I was entirely smitten. It's hard to describe what attracted me to him because it's one of those "I know it when I see it" things. It was his presence, his body language, his tone of voice, the look in his eye, the way he interacted with me and made me feel. (I've also come to realize that I'm completely obsessed with the way he smells.)

My ex was a shortish chubby guy with a pockmarked face. We met online (not through a dating site), and while I enjoyed talking to him and we had a great rapport, I honestly wasn't sure if I'd feel anything physically when we met in person. But he was disarmingly witty, weird and charming, and I was instantly attracted to him.

Honestly the more I think about it the more I think I don't experience "physical attraction." Sure some guys are nice to look at, aesthetically. But I don't feel that pull, that fire in my loins, until he interacts with me in a way that sparks my attraction.

The guys I've dated and slept with ran the gamut physically, but they all had very similar energies and demeanors. They were all sensual, quirky, high-energy, flirtatious, charming and a little cocky (some more than a little). I think ultimately that's what attracts me to a guy.

Edit: I actually realized recently that Brendon Urie is the perfect celebrity example of the kind of guy I'm attracted to. He's so expressive and hyper and squirrelly, he reminds me a lot of my husband actually lol

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ThisIsJustATr1bute · 2019-06-04T05:05:16+00:00

Yes

Edit: but they become good-looking to me. So.

MaxwellPancakesMcgee · 2019-06-04T05:16:48+00:00

I didn't find my current LTR of 8 years attractive at first. I tend to go for chubby but string guys that look like they work hard outdoors all day. This dude was bony and scrawny, he has a huge nose, huge crazy eyebrows, a weird mole and visible psoriasis.

I'm no prize either myself.

But... He had an extremely expressive face. He's very excitable, had his shit somewhat together and we have a lot of very niche things in common. I don't find like minds often. I know a good deal when I see one. He's grown on me quite a bit, and I managed to get some weight on him. He lifts a lot and takes much better care of himself now.

Different women value different things.

J_Milton_Jr · 2019-06-04T06:10:27+00:00

yes, I found my former teacher very attractive (bald, 170 cm , crooked teeth .. but funny and very smart)

all of my boyfriends were not attractive in the classical sense and most women would either have found them weird looking or flat out ugly, but they were smart, musicians, artists, funny and in their little social circle at the top of the food chain.

my most attractive boyfriend is my current BF where my best friend said "how did you get that hot guy?" while the mother of a friend said "what does she want with HIM, she deserves better".

I think its always a bit in the eye of the beholder

87AudreyHorne · 2019-06-04T08:47:19+00:00

Once i am sexually attracted i start to think of him as good looking. I could say not "conventionally good looking" but I cant simultaneously find him sexually attractive and bad looking. Ive very likely been attracted to many guys you might find not to be good looking.

I dont know what you consider emotional attraction but I was just talking about this in another comment. Its like when you watch a show and the way you would rank the characters hotness at a first glance can completely change a few episodes in, when some start to annoy you and become unattractive and others are so cool they go from average to the top of the list. Im sure everyone gets this example, and there is no personal benefit or relationship values that is affecting the judgment here.

SqueaksScreech · 2019-06-04T20:28:52+00:00

Pretty much all the time. They were either some what thin or a bit chubby.

quotient_is · 2019-06-05T04:30:15+00:00

For sure. Some of the best sex I've ever had was with a guy most people would think is ugly. He's into the same niche things I am, which made the sex constantly exciting. I'm still highly sexually attracted to him and it's been nearly five years since I've seen him in person.

boomcheese44 · 2019-06-04T02:32:01+00:00

QueenCousland86 · 2019-06-04T02:40:39+00:00

Yes, because he was hilarious, and for me, at least, humor trumps looks every time.

FlavFal · 2019-06-04T02:43:25+00:00

Nah.

kandyapplez · 2019-06-04T06:28:55+00:00

yes, quite often.

as a teenager i was super into this boy because he was the coolest in his pack of piece of shit skaters and would always do stupid shit to impress me and i loved how he'd put on a show in front of all of our friends just for me
i was into boys in bands who looked like shit but were popular. if a boy could sing i was all about it. if he was myspace popular i wanted to be his girl lol.

i really didn't care about looks until college lol

meomeowmeoww · 2019-06-04T09:07:23+00:00

That's all my exes. And if they were attracted to me, I would be the same thing.

Maybelowsmv · 2019-06-04T09:45:47+00:00

lol yes when I was 16

he even had a boogie in his nose once

but that crush started after he stayed behind school to help me with something

he was the first guy to actually turn me on LOL

he did this thing where he always rubbed his thighs under the table, and it got me feeling really good

i was so whipped tho. whenever he skived a class or missed lessons, id get him copies of the work and id even make simplified notes for him :(

at the end, he failed so badly he got kicked out of my college

and i did really well that year, probs from the consistent revision i did on his behalf

but yeah, never again will I allow myself to ignore a guy's ugliness

he was the one who bullied me... good looking guys have always been much nicer to me

he used to be really unpopular, but got popularity from my friends, and saw me as below him. i know that because he threw my ID card in the bin when my friend playfully put it in his folder </3

[deleted] · 2019-06-04T11:55:42+00:00

He'd have to have a really nice fit body. And be tall

Regal_Newt · 2019-06-04T16:45:00+00:00

I've found people attractive that OTHER people don't. But no, I've never felt sexual attraction for someone I wasn't physically attracted to.

KikiYuyu · 2019-06-04T16:53:03+00:00

Emotional attraction is necessary for my full sexual attraction. Not everyone I think is sexy is someone I'd have sex with.

grand_tiremaster · 2019-06-05T01:42:10+00:00

prototype1B · 2019-06-06T20:12:48+00:00

Yup Ive been sexually attracted to men I can recognize are not conventionally attractive by western standards. One in particular (I had a huge crush on) has a receeding hairline, skinny w/ no muscle tone, pasty af, no fashion sense ( wears dated wire frame glasses, graphic tees, and dad jeans), big nose, no "Chad" bone structure, nasal Jewish voice, very intelligent but also has aspergers-like mannerisms, also has very specific hobbies and interests. If I lived near this dude I would be on Dat ass immediately lol. Recently I found myself checking out a guy I saw at the Barnes and Noble, he looked like stereotypical NEET/hikikomori Asian guy, and was literally 1-2 inches taller than me, I'm 5'4... Even without knowing his personality I still found him attractive enough to ogle.

yasee · 2019-06-04T02:18:50+00:00

like average or actually ugly?

Title	Q4W: Have you ever been sexually attracted to a guy who is not good looking?
Author	_anothergumnut_
Upvotes	6
Comments	121
Date	June 4, 2019 1:18 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/bwiqkv/q4w_have_you_ever_been_sexually_attracted_to_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-have-you-ever-been-sexually-attracted-to-a-guy.255470 https://theredarchive.com/post/255470

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