Basically that why don't women communicate straight like "I want this and this" or "that and that is bothering me", why do they expect men to get "hints", and "signs", and especially in a relationship the whole infamous "What's wrong?" "Nothing!" "Come on, what is wrong, I can see you are not happy?" "Nothing is wrong." types of debates that are basically all about women expecting men to telepathically (or, well, empathically) find out their thoughts.

I am mostly BP, I believe that there are all kinds of woemn and that at least for intelligent people equal relationships can work, although this particular "take my hints" or "find out what I am thinking" behavior was true for many different kinds of women I met i.e. not only for the very feminine ones but also for more masculine women who drove forklifts or did karate.

Now, RP says that women want to be dominated. But they cannot say this directly, because once she requests it, it is not real domination. It is only real domination if it is your idea. RP says sometimes it is that kind of domination where you expect her to serve you and sometimes it is that more equal kind where you lead her to somewhere she wants to go anyway. So for example women don't like being asked what restaurant you want to go to but simply taken to somewhere interesting, and women give hints because they want men to have their own initiate hence be in the dominant position, the active, not the reactive position, and even the "what is wrong" "nothing" can also be somehow explain this way.

I think RP is wrong. At the very least about the later. The "what is wrong" "nothing" is not a call to be dominated. So far I could figure out, it is almost the opposite, it is asking for more gentleness and love. "You are doing things that make me sad, but there is no point in me telling you what: if you would really love me, you would not do them anyway. If I have to tell you to not do X, Y, Z, this means you are not loving me so what is even the point? Our relationship is screwed anyway."

The "taking subtle hints" and "don't ask me what restaurant to take me to" is not really about submission either. It has more to do with women really wanting to get to know men before the accept a relationship, so they choose not to interfere much, by making requests, but sort of watch and see what he does on his own. Is he capable of making an approach if yes how, is he capable of taking a woman to an interesting place without having to ask where? These are apparently important informations that they want to watch and collect. Having said that, yes, women tend to like if men take some initiative. But it is not the same as dominance.

Yet, I cannot fully explain this phenomenon. Any non-RP ideas that do not involve dominance?