Last night I go to meet up with my buddy at the gym, Daryl. Lately when I see him, he seems really sad, Just not there. We work together and he seems to be having trouble handling the job lately. On top of that he’s banging the secretary in the main office. Told him this was a bad idea. He doesn’t listen.
Not only is he shitting where he’s eating with a women he speaks directly to, frequently, on a professional basis. He has developed hardcore oneitis for her. Worst part, she is married. She has 2 kids. And is 41. He is 24. Breaking every RP principle known to man. But some guys just aren’t ready to be saved.
We meet at the entrance of the gym and he got that sad look on. I say “you Aite man? Every time I see you anymore you look like you’re about to cry”
His voice cracks. I am confused...He actually is crying. He says “remember how you told me not to get emotionally attached”
Why yes Daryl I do recall.
“Well I did. And look” (as his eyes start to water)
He hands me his phone and there’s a legit 6 paragraph long email from “Pudding ❤️”
I read the first sentence which has the “I’m letting you down easy. It isn’t you it’s me tone” and then I tell him I’m not reading all this. And hand him his phone back and go to work out. The whole fucking time he’s looking at this email. Closing it out. Pacing. Opening it. Reading it. Closing it. Tearing up. Opening it again.
“Wtf bro? Let’s lift”
He’s zoned out. Staring out into the beta abyss. Then comes the Same shit, On his phone. Scrolling. Reading. Pacing. Crying.
I can’t help but think, why??! What are you looking for? But then I remember, I’ve been there before back in the day. So I think, what was I looking for? Why do we do this shit and torture ourselves?
Was the only thing that could come to mind. Just searching for some sentence in there that would give him hope. That he still might have a chance to make things work with old Betty baggage.
I then start thinking about the recent post from u/gaylubeoil that many of you bashed. How convenient, it actually came in handy. “Be a leader and get this poor puss out of his head.”
I tell him let’s go bro. I start making him do supersets. High reps. Very short breaks between exercise. Tell him to fucking breath. “3 More. 2 More. That one looked easy. 2 more.” (Anything to get his Mind off this chick. And really push him) He’s laughing now but pushing through.
He said no when I asked him about grabbing food after when we first got there. Now he’s in. We order, sit down. What’s old Daryl doing? Looking for hope again. I grab the phone and say:
“I’m deleting this shit”
“NO!” He shrieks.
“Why? So you can read it all night and torture yourself?”
I give in and start reading it. I skim. She is talking about how much she loves him that’s why she has to let him go and blocked him. How their age difference is a big issue and “everyone keeps telling her that.” How he’s young and looks at other girls and she already has wrinkles. How she can’t just leave her kids and husband who needs her. For a younger guy who hasn’t lived fully and is so into just the sex. But she knows he can make someone else really happy. 6 paragraphs pretty much summed up to “you can’t/haven’t passed one shit test”
I huff out a laugh. And shake my head.
He’s silent. I delete it.
We talk about it briefly. (Now I have spoke to Daryl about red pill concepts when he has come to me for advice, without saying what they were exactly. So if he took it serious he wouldn’t be here. but again. He’s not ready to be saved.)
The next thing he says..
“Do you think I can get her back? She says she loves me” (with a naive sense of hope)
No Daryl. But this gyro is banging right now, what time are we lifting tomorrow?
The Take Away
The only real hope here is that after a couple more let downs Daryl will open his eyes to the reality of it all.
We have all been Daryl. We are no longer Daryl. Or no longer have to be him. But Daryl is not ready to be saved from the false reality he has been raised to believe to be true. Daryl is still looking for hope in his blue pill beliefs.
It’s humbling and a good thing to see this shit first hand every now and then. To see how far we all have come. To think how we too used to do cringe shit like this. And to be glad that this place exists to stop living like this, we know better now. But To see one of your boys who is a grown man, crying, In the gym. Over an email from some post wall is enough to make ya sick. Sheesh.
All we can do is be good leaders/examples and friends. Instead of preaching red pill to your boys who aren’t ready to hear it, And wasting your breath. you can push them to be the best they can be along with you. Maybe one day they will jump aboard. We all needed to go through this type of shit to get where we are today. Daryl is just another one of us.