What are some signs a man is 'settling' for a woman?

CantBonkThis · 2021-06-29T12:38:10+00:00

He says "Happy wife, happy life" unironically

passepar2t · 2021-06-29T09:52:29+00:00

Same as the other one. No enthusiasm or affection.

TheFreeloader · 2021-06-29T11:37:01+00:00

He's not interested in talking to her, because he does not regard her as worthy of his time and attention. He won't share what's on his mind, and he has no patience for listening to her concerns. He doesn't value her perspective, but is annoyed by it. When in a conversation he will either stonewall or steamroll the conversation.

Chefbraidy · 2021-06-29T10:42:28+00:00

Usually a guy who has no other options with women and married the first girl that reciprocated interest with him has settled. Men with plenty of choices with women don't settle.

Aldabruzzo · 2021-06-29T14:20:23+00:00

I didn't settle so far that I didn't get most of what I wanted.

But ALL men settle in that they take what they can get, because that's what men have to do. Lucky for us, when we settle, we can still get most of what we want.

In general, when a man has settled so far that he's not getting what he wants:

--he puts up with all manner of bullshit from her. Mistreatment, abuse, sexual deprivation.

--she shittalks him to his face and he does nothing about it.

--she openly shittalks him to her friends.

--he doesn't care about her - spends time without her and away from her

--goes through the motions in work and life

--sinks into depression or becomes anxious

HDF_ · 2021-06-29T11:38:45+00:00

Any dude that capitulates to an ultimatum, undoubtedly, is settling.

-Ivar-TheBoneless · 2021-06-29T14:23:07+00:00

Why you have to ask about or complain about the sex.

Laytheblameonluck · 2021-06-29T17:35:38+00:00

He's settling when he's always had a type of girl he's been attracted to, and she doesn't fit that type.

E.g. if he's always being chasing blonde women and she's a brunette, that indicates settling.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-06-29T18:05:13+00:00

When the enthusiasm is minimal, and really the same as the other one if a guy had certain kind of women he dates and lust after and his wife is just does not fit and to that characteristic it's very possible

Any_Championship_654 · 2021-06-29T18:49:32+00:00

Lack of sex, lack of initiating, not interested during the act.

Also if a man seems beaten down by his woman's constant nagging or fighting, he's settling maybe not in a sexual sense but definitely in the sense that he is unhappy with the person he's with.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2021-06-30T04:18:20+00:00

He has 4 side chicks

801735 · 2021-06-29T10:47:36+00:00

What are some signs a man is 'settling' for a woman?

Age.

Didn't build with her.

Take a look at his social circle. Especially the frienemies one.

Are "all" his frienemies getting relationshipped (off)?

Does he WANT to be with her or merely tolerate-ish her around?

Can he stand her being around for prolonged time?

Is he neglecting her and "plays golf" all days long at the local bar?

Does he have a life without/outside her/them?

Does he hate it/her when she's happy?

Is he playing the attrition game, chameleoning "traddudery"?

There's lots of subtle signs to look out for.

neubs · 2021-06-29T12:49:08+00:00

Is she fat?

ItWasBrokenAlready · 2021-06-29T13:44:45+00:00

Doesn't escalate commitment at any point, is just 'going with it' with some kind of relationship inertia. They go exclusive after she initiated 'what are we' conversation. They move together after some nagging on her part. They get engaged after 7 years and lots of social pressure. Heck, they even get married and she if she pushes for children enough, he'll finally agree to them.

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-06-29T16:23:50+00:00

Infidelity.

gimpgirl555 · 2021-06-29T10:43:33+00:00

Women who were settled for, what did you notice?

What did I notice? That he had wild delusions. Like he thought he was Scarface. He thought he was gonna get a blonde trophy wife. And he thought he'd get all of that after college.

I was always seen as a temporary thing. Until he discovered reality.

Now he's pretty nice to me, but that's after I gave him a lot of stuff. He realised that no other woman is going to do that for him.

CosmicBioHazard · 2021-06-29T10:29:53+00:00

Maybe this is just me, but I don't think I can say lack of affection, in the traditional sense, would come from me as a sign that I'd settled.

It's simple why; all the LTR stuff, the cuddling, the kissing, etc. is still addictive no matter who I've settled for; just because I'm not much into her wouldn't mean that would stop, 'cause where else am I gonna get my fix?

Nation_of_Two · 2021-06-29T15:05:10+00:00

Cheats on her. Ignores her. Spends all his time somewhere else. Makes excuses. The way you would treat anyone you despise.

IOportA · 2021-06-30T02:36:53+00:00

She is a very good homemaker & she basically takes care of his life, without hassling him or creating any drama.

Some men will settle for a woman who may not be hot in the face if she's great in every other area.

It's basically the opposite mindset to the man who puts up with a terrible woman because she's hot.

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Namah-Mayco · 2021-06-30T14:58:22+00:00

They make a Reddit post asking "how do I get over my girlfriend not being a virgin?"

4derp · 2021-06-29T10:27:44+00:00

We settle now? I was unaware.

Title	What are some signs a man is 'settling' for a woman?
Author	Freevoulous
Upvotes	19
Comments	63
Date	June 29, 2021 6:56 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/oa3024/what_are_some_signs_a_man_is_settling_for_a_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-are-some-signs-a-man-is-settling-for-a-woman.787860 https://theredarchive.com/post/787860

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