So much wrong with this piece of shit. Imagine being married to a mopey depressed man who claims he is depressed because he is obsessed with your friend. BARF.

Love my wife, can't stop thinking about her friend.

📷

Okay, I've been debating myself to see if I should talk about this but here it goes. About 7 years ago, I moved to a city where I became friends with a married female in our church. I don't remember how we got each others phone numbers but it turned into a on and off texting friendship. I was single at the time. We texted each other on and off for about 5 years, until I met my wife. My married friend and her family moved to another church across town. Was funny is that I was planning to move to the same church before I even found out that she was moving. Anyway, fast forward to July 2018 and we are still seeing each other at different churches. Before we had moved, for a while and something, we hadn't really texted. After we moved, we started texting again and it got kinda close, she would ask questions in general out of the blue and lead to a conversation back and forth from time to time. Most of the time when this happened was during the day and sometimes at night. My wife, (before we got together) became good friends with her. We started dating and would hang out with my friend and her husband once in a while. During the time of us dating, we stopped texting and rather my friend would text my wife to see how we were doing, instead of me. I know there's nothing wrong with that, but I felt that she liked me and maybe she was just happy I had found someone. Anyway, before I get ahead of myself, I developed feelings for her and cared about her a lot. She's got a beautiful face and petite body that I couldn't stop thinking about, not to sound weird and of course she has a great heart and qualities. Just to throw this in there that might be weird but I masterbated a lot to her pictures on social media through that time. Anyway, fast forward to our wedding in 2019, somehow, she was my wife's maid of honor in a sense. I was very happy to marry my wife. I do care and love her very much, but my heart was with my friend also. I couldn't focus at times during the wedding due to her looking so drop dead beautiful. Just to through this in there, a couple of months before the wedding, she bought lingerie for my wife to wear for when my wife and I are intimate, 3 outfits (not sure if that means anything). Anyway, after the wedding, as usual for any couple, my wife and I had sex for the first time, and I must confess, I couldn't stop thinking about my friend. Its been a couple of years, and I still can't stop thinking about her. I've tried to wrap my head around to the fact I need to move on and live in depression. I care about my wife deeply, but this has been an ongoing emotional battle. I probably made a mistake and confessed this to my wife about a year ago and off course, it didn't sit well with her. We are still together thankfully but I really don't want this to bring down my marriage. My wife is out of town now and I've have masterbated to my friends pictures. I feel terrible and trapped don't know what to do. I feel like a failure as a husband and a friend. My friend has no idea how I feel about her all these years. I want to be a loyal husband and have tried to forget about my friend but I can't. It like I'm chasing an impossible fantasy that is stuck in me. Thoughts?