Does it get easier?

IvoShandor · 2025-09-17T01:10:52+00:00

Time heals. And new pu$$y. Get some.

probebeta · 2025-09-16T23:09:26+00:00

It does get easier when you rise above it. It does take a bit of transformation on your part to get there and it does take time. Follow advice here, go to gym, self improvement to the max, you'll be ok. Good luck to you.

Upstairs-Pizza-1843 · 2025-09-16T15:51:31+00:00

It won't get easier so long as you have to see them every day, but I think you know that. They've done you a dirty, now it's business. Get away and find another job.

Suspicious_Dot6179 · 2025-09-16T15:26:09+00:00

Bro ALL you need to do is see the cheating hoe with her new BF and things will calm down internally

Ok_Builder_3285 · 2025-09-16T14:41:18+00:00

It doesn't get better.

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2025-09-16T14:21:01+00:00

it will absolutely get better and
once you realize she was with another guy you're going to look at her and be grossed out.

KendhammerJ · 2025-09-16T14:20:11+00:00

She was probably saying that because she wasn't sure if this guy would commit to her or not. Sorry brotha there is no going back. You would never trust and would always resent her, and she would lose respect for you knowing that you have no boundaries and would take her back after she cheated. You would just be delaying the inevitable. In the words of David Goggins "F*ck Her". She wants the divorce and wants to move on, then great. Give it to her and become a man that she is going to regret leaving. Leave the job, go travel, change cities and go meet more attractive women. You can make this the best thing that ever happened to you brotha. I know it sucks now, but you have no idea what you could turn your life into.

DetroiterInTX · 2025-09-16T14:15:22+00:00

It certainly takes time, but it does get better. There will be some days that are very difficult too.

Playing the what-if game only drives you crazy and doesn’t change what is happening. I try to stop myself when I recognize what I am doing. If you can focus on yourself and your own choices, rather than what she is choosing to do with her life, that will help you move forward. Hobbies and physical activity are your friend here.

wparo · 2025-09-16T14:06:22+00:00

Let her go. I know it's easier said than done, but you need to accept that your marriage is over and figure out what your next steps are.
Focus on yourself and your kids.
Hit the gym

Helpful-Paramedic463 · 2025-09-16T11:32:39+00:00

It's called Hypergamy. Women are climbers and will always be looking for someone who can provide a better life. It's their programming. Sucks but that's the way it is.

fsk71823 · 2025-09-16T11:13:10+00:00

I'm pretty much in the same boat. It brothers me a little bit still, but I've come to that realization that she's going to do what she's going to do. I can only control myself and my happiness.

LoveCrispApples · 2025-09-16T10:14:45+00:00

It does, but it takes a good long while. My ex monkey-branched immediately, and it tore at my soul. This is why they are the weaker sex. She's just filling a void, and her rebound is just as pathetic as she is.

Don't bother asking her questions. You won't get the truth. Forget about reconciliation. It'll only make her colder and probably more vicious.

Now is the time to focus on you. Get yourself in order. Eat something. Try and rest your body. Connect with people who care about you. Show her no emotion. This is all business from here on out, so get the best deal you can from a legal standpoint while she's still in La-La land with loverboy.

A year from now, you'll be where you need to be.

Equanimous-Fox · 2025-09-16T10:09:20+00:00

Yes. It hurts and there’s a lot of soul searching and pain, but you grow and let go of resentments and then it gets better.

Just try not to become bitter. That really only hurts you. Good luck

MiloGoesToPorridge · 2025-09-16T07:47:11+00:00

It absolutely positively does get easier, don't be in any doubt about that.

The problem is, we are men, and it takes us a while. As someone else in here said, they can go to the supermarket and find cock if they want to, that's their advantage over us. It looks like they 'move on' quick because of this, but it smacks to me of panic and a need to be rescued.

Our advantage, is that we are much, much better at playing the long game. After enough time has passed, you won't even be 'playing' anything- you'll have simply got on with your life and she'll be nothing but a shadow of the past.

Walk through this discomfort for a while, for there is a much brighter dawn just waiting for you.

Frito_P3ndejo · 2025-09-16T06:20:44+00:00

For me the standing up for yourself is/was paramount….spent a lot of the marriage go along with shit to make her happy and still ended up hosed. Bitches are crazy! You get zero credit for faithfulness or reliability.

Techdude_Advanced · 2025-09-16T05:45:39+00:00

Men take time to heal. You need to be in a good mental place. They can literally walk into a supermarket and find someone to sleep with within minutes. We are wired differently, play the long game and win at life man.

It gets awesome but you need to plan your life.

ReasonableSoup172 · 2025-09-16T05:18:22+00:00

Go get laid yourself man.

Its a really good distraction and saves you from ruminating over this endlessly.

Reflog1791 · 2025-09-16T05:15:51+00:00

Yes go to gym get buff update wardrobe and haircut. Might even get you a raise at work. Ex wife and divorce will be old news and many fine women will want a shot at the champ.

upvotersfortruth · 2025-09-16T05:05:01+00:00

100% it does, brother. A lot of us have been pretty much right where you are. Do the work, compartmentalize, focus on the business of the divorce, take care of yourself and like just about all of us, you'll come out better and stronger on the other side.

Step 1: Get out of the marriage mindset. Divorce is a game and she's your opponent. Behave strategically, not generously or with true kindness or understanding. Show her no true emotion, not anger, not happiness, not pain - nothing. She's lost those privileges. Don't fall for her emotional whipsawing to get what she wants - only to leave you hurting again once she gets it. Save your generosity or kindness for the end of the divorce, to get the deal closed. Don't beg to settle, the pain doesn't end with the divorce ending. Stand up for yourself and a fair deal.

Title	Does it get easier?
Author	NoMongoose2591
Upvotes	20
Comments	41
Date	September 16, 2025 4:55 AM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ni8ed3/does_it_get_easier/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/does-it-get-easier.1562082 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562082

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