Below an edited version of my comment from a couple of weeks ago that seemed to move so many, sorry for the delay on this one, team!

I believe the hardest part of FDS and being truly high value isn’t even subscribing ideologically, but becoming ruthless in your evaluation and ACTIONS of cutting men loose. Of the early bosses you'll confront in your FDS journey, the first one for many of you may be the resistance from your libfem, 50-50, sex pos conditioning. The second may be the shame. A middle-difficulty boss may be interiorizing that FDS isn't just one of several viable options for present-day women, but rather (despite its imperfections) the only and single path that can serve for the median-woman to avoid disaster. Yes, disaster. I did use such a serious frase on a dating forum.

Being single and in the dating scene forever, being perpetually looking (if you’re a romantic and not a female separatist) isn’t being doomed, doomed is being in a dead end relationship or marriage for one, two, four or ten years. I know the rules about forever girlfriend-ing are clear so you probably now know that you shouldn't stick around for four. But what about one year? Despite the fact that when you look back you know you should have dumped him at 5 months. Or sticking around for 18 months knowing that at 8 months your gut was telling you it’s not it.

On the gates behind which lies the final boss of FDS is engraved one question: will I succeed in finding a HVM and having my happily ever after or am I doomed to not find him? For most women, this will be as far as they go. But saavy FDSers will know that this is a trick question - there is no such binary. Only when you realize the obvious bullshit of this dichotomy, you will have cracked the philosophy that underlines all FDS dogmas, principles, memes, examples, etc.

You will know deep in your soul that "better alone than ill-matched" is not just single-girl copium, but in fact the most protective mindset society knew better than to let you develop. The final boss of FDS - that will face not once but several times in your life, and in different shapes, and with different arms or weaknesses within yourself - is mastering the ability to cut men loose on the spot. Mastering the ability to cut a man off like an infected, rotten limb - despite your feelings.

FDS is essentially defensive. That why we are not a hate ideology. We are reactive, responsive and we are adaptive. We are open-eyed. If you've paying attention, FDS doesn't give you a guide to find a good man, or build a successful relationship. Every so often there are posts askign where to find HVM and though well-meaning, I find them some of the constructinve because it just is not subject to formula. It is essentially subject to chance.

The goal of FDS is not to teach you how to find a diamond amongst the coals, it's to help you identify as soon as possible any signs that a man (and eventually, general situations) CAN and WILL be harmful to you, so that you can dip as soon as detected.

FDS is essentially an art of reconnaissance. Based on history, science, statistics, critical thinking,, collective wisdom, collective knowledge and our collective experiences as women. FDS is a frameset of tools that, should you develop them enough, will aid you in averting the guy that's gonna say he left his wallet and leave you on the hook with a $300 restaurant bill, as much as a man that will kill you after 20 years of marriage and 3 kids, to take your life insurance and run off with his mistress. It is one strategy for it all.

It is a strategy for averting disaster. Disaster is when you destine yourself to give up and settle for “could be worse” in order to not be alone.

Disaster is if a man who was HV and used to make you happy, treated you right, one day turns on you and you find yourself unprepared or incapable of dumping him with the same (not ease, of course, you’re human but) RESOLUTION as if you’d met him 3 weeks ago.

Being single - at any age - is not the worst outcome.

Whenever I think of my “failed” relationships, personally I at least have the comfort that it was give or take a year, with each guy, seeing and doing new things, living a new life and new adventures. Id much rather that, much rather have a new boyfriend every year for the next twenty years, than have spent 5 years in a forever gf situation with some chump who’s no longer in the picture, or worse: spend the next ten with a guy whose kids I bred and now rolls his eyes at me and makes me feel like the biggest drag on Earth. I'd rather cry a bit to my girlfriends one night over drinks every six months than cry myself to sleep in my own damn house with my own damn husband who doesn't appreciate me and doesn't love me, pretending that he doesn't notice.

I'd rather live. 'Id rather fall in love, have fun, bond, have sex, see the world through someone new. Someone younger, older, different. Id rather start over 20 times than beat a dead horse with the last scraps of my dignity, mental health and optimism. This is disaster. And this is what FDS seeks to help you avoid.

I think many of us here above a certain age can confidently say for a fact things never get better once they’ve soured, so as a woman you can independently be as HV as you want, but if you don’t have it in you or don’t develop the guts to split like a banana ASAP, then yes you will be doomed to disaster and all this time you spend on the internet hyping yourself into FDS will remain nothing but rhetoric.

But have no doubts: if you are a woman that's dating, statistically you will more likely than not end up married eventually and unless you are an exceptionally lucky individual, disaster will come if you can’t walk the talk.

Because you can GET a man but what will it be like? Walking the talk is hardest. Immerse yourself in FDS daily and eventually It’ll be easy to dump a guy after 4 dates or 2 months. Block and delete. Easy peasy. You'll come here and post about it and we'll give you lots of karma and rightfully support you. And you will deserve it.

But what if it’s your boyfriend of 15 months who suddenly called you a stupid idiot for the first time in an argument? And what if you’re 33 when this happens and you feel you’re against the clock already?

Or worse: What if it’s your husband of 5 years that you caught “harmlessly” flirting with his long term ex over Facebook? Gd forbid these things happen to you, but if they do, this is when you need to have the balls and self esteem of steel to leave him.

Blocking fuckboys from online dating or who slid into your DMs saves you time, energy and protects you. But it’s just part of the bigger picture of flexing your self-preservation muscles for a scenario when your livelihood, human dignity or potentially your literal life are at stake.

Think about it: If you can’t bring yourself to block and delete a guy who now leaves you on read after lovebombing you, how are you gonna muster up the guts to dump your long term boyfriend when he messes up?

And If you can’t dump your boyfriend of 10 months whom you JUST went public with on social media, JUST introduced to your family (and the same week your most important ex got engaged 💀) because he called you a "piece of shit" in an argument, or because he threw the phone at you and starting following random women on Instagram the whole weekend while you drove yourself sick with worry - are you gonna leave your cheating husband?

If you can't block a scrote you lied to you about meeting up with his ex, are you gonna leave your husband who slapped you? I know you think it's different - but is it really? Are you 120% confident that though you may take a little shit, you certainly won't put up with a LOT OF VERY SERIOUS SHIT?

Therein lies the importance of learning to stick up for yourself when stakes are lower - that you build the backbone and strength to act decisively DESPITE THE FEAR of the unknown, the fear of the ensuing shit show - for when stakes are highest.

It’s scary. I know you can feel that because of your age, your baggage, your looks, your financial situation, YOUR WHATEVER, that you don’t have many options. Or any at all lol. And maybe you don't. I said it: maybe you don't. Even though you may know you deserve better, you may be tempted to think you can make-do because this is the only man you’re gonna get and he’s not that bad and there is no perfect man, right? I feel you, I really do.

And we’re not gonna tell you here that your Prince Charming hvm is out there, but if what you want is love, as least try (again) to find it. ask yourself: Do you want Love or do you just want A mAn? Fine, a MaN but this one? That’s what I thought.

Be brave, and TOUGHEN UP with these scrotes. Be ruthless in the pursuit and protection of your own best interest even though you feel like an imposter. Go to bed tonight and tell yourself that starting tomorrow when you wake up you will go zero to 60 and Act like you've been chucking ill-meaning, ill-behaved men since you were born without hesitation.

Act like it and with time your character will grow to fill out those badass actions you’ve taken, and they will become second nature. The philosophy (FDS), the actions (leaving and sticking up for yourself), and the genuine belief will sync inside of you eventually and there will be but one path. But only if you act and block/dump/leave him.

The actions need to come first, sis. If you wait until you are in a better place financially, emotionally, logistically, mentally, lookswise, to stick up for yourself - you will end up exploited, potentially abused and you will never level up.

Unfortunately the challenge of FDS is not chucking men like you are 25, model-tier, ivy-league educated and have your whole life and options ahead of you. The challenge is sending these scrotes to kick rocks when you (and them) probably consider you at your lowest. When neither of you thinks you could have in you. We are here to tell you that YOU DO. Testament to that is that you're reading this. You're still coming on here. You're still learning. Heck, even if you're still lurking. You HAVE IT IN YOU to stick the hell up for yourself sis, that's why you're here and not on the r p women or the trad wive shit.

FDS has no requirements to admission. Just that you be female and that you do not actively argue against out principles and philosophy because it is all there for a reason. The fact that you are here, no matter how much you've messed up, humiliated or degraded yourself, shows that you can stick up for yourself. And I want you to know that no matter your past or current situation, it's never too late to hit them with a plot twist and start sticking up for yourself.

Today you may be a poor bitch whose boyfriend blocks her on instagram and she makes a fake account to stalk if he’s following someone. But tomorrow you can be a bitch that walks out of a restaurant because a guy called your hobby a waste of time - and not before ordering a doggy bag mid meal on his dime without breaking eye contact.

Today you may be a poor bitch who looks the other way when she knows her man is talking to women on social media, a bitch that keeps the peace. But tomorrow you are a bitch who lets the guy connect the dots (or not) of why your phone is out of service to him because you gave him one warning and one warning only.

Today you are up all night checking the last WhatsApp online status of that guy who isn’t texting you anymore. Tomorrow you are JLo in that movie where she left her abusive husband.

Today you are a bitch crying at your boyfriend to not yell at you or not leave the house during an argument but tomorrow, you’ve had a divorce lawyer in silence for two months and got your ducks in a row and packed your shit and moved out while your husband was taking a “long lunch” with his wOrK WiFe for the second time in one week.

Why these examples? Because Disaster is living a spineless, gutless life where men walk all over you with impunity.

The happy ending that FDS wants for all women is the opposite of that: a gutsy life of sticking up for yourself whenever and to whatever extent is needed.

But the work starts small. With block and delete. With dumping him. With not negotiating with people who have shown to be bad faith actors.

It starts with not letting society shame into staying in a failed relationship because of the fear or stigma of AnoThEr FaILeD ReLaTIoNsHiP.

And all these guts you build, will come in handy in every aspect of your life and that is the truth. But if you can’t rely on yourself to protect yourself in the small it will take a miracle for your to act decisively in the big and the terrible. Now, do you want to rely on a miracle or do you want to rely on yourself?

You need to act in your own defense - despite your emotions, your feelings, your nostalgia and your attachment. despite your investment to any man. This means doing what you know has to be done.

I am a big romantic and I love dating. FDS doesn’t mean you’ll be alone unless you find that perfect hvm, it means you don’t stick around when any man - whether two dates, two years or two kids in - tries to fuck with you.

FDS despite its name, is far more than a dating formula, it’s a philosophy of personal integrity where you don’t let anybody fuck with you. Especially when it’s the patriarchy and very especially when it’s individual men who you have blessed with your trust and the opportunity to be in just, loving, long-lasting relationship with you. You, someone who is fair-dealing, nice, sincere, and caring.

Doom, is when you live a life where people can fuck with you and get away with it, or where they try to fuck with you and you try to plead with them to not go so hard on you instead of grabbing your purse/Netflix password/your kids/your half of everything and fucking off.

Doom is staying where you know you aren’t wanted, but tolerated. And sometimes barely.

If you want the romance and the fun and enjoyment and excitement of dating by all means do so, but fire and replace men as needed. And as swiftly as needed. So you technically won’t be alone, but your rotation will be quick and agile because you chuck them as soon as they mess up. But I say, better to date 4 men in a year and toss each at 3 months when he blows it, than let the same one man make a fool out of you for 365 days.

That way you enjoyed four men on their ✨best behavior✨, instead of one who was good for 1-3 months, then from 3-6 got comfortable, 6-9 was mediocre and 9-12 just the worst. See how much sense this makes when I put it like this lol same amount of time but all profit .

If you current man is giving you the silent treatment or being an abusive jerk, don’t tell yourself “oh but he was so great before I want to get back to that” or start googling yourself crazy over “is he a narc?” Instead tell yourself “If he’s a narc, then I could be getting lovebombed to the nines by another narc right now” so might as well.

Point is, while you seek that HVM, and entertain men during that search, at least entertain them when they’re on their best behavior only. Why would you put up with anything else? The only doom is settling and that IS in your control.

Since we are not a separatist sub, and though don't we demand anyone date, we clearly don't welcome separatist propaganda here, you are here because you want to find someone and you want to find love.

But keep in mind sis that FAITH IN LOVE, isn't sticking around a guy that tried to fuck with you or a guy that already made you feel like shit (however passing) or already made you cry, that's FEAR. Faith in love is chucking men like you know there are plenty are better out there, whether it feels like it or not. Always ask yourself if you are staying or pursing something out of fear or faith.

Be really, really honest with yourself. Are you afraid of paying the bills alone? are you afraid your're the only unmarried one left in your circle? Are you afraid of judgment from your religious family? Are you afraid no other man will want you (spoiler:they will, no matter what youve been through).

If the answer is fear, know that fear is the mind killer - it disrupts your decision making in your own benefit. Fear is a fast-track ticket to disaster.

Next time any man tries to fuck with you (don't worry you'll know it in your gut) ask yourself: am I gonna act like I'm afraid, like this scrote intimidated, or I am gonna show this piece of shit what I'm made of and GTFO his life?

*Keyword ACT ;) fake it till you make it and your life will blossom