So many pickmes love to tout that hookup culture isn’t that bad because they hooked up with their boyfriend and it’s been X years of bliss since. As much as women have convinced themselves this is a flex, I refuse to see it as that.

We all know how men love to yell that women who have indiscriminate sex are easy and hoes. While this comes from a place of misogyny and objectification in men, I have the same views for men who are willing to have sex with women they’ve known for less than 24 hours.

To me, it means a) he doesn’t mind sleeping with strangers so he’s not picky and b) he’s used to taking what he can get with women. I don’t know about you but if I committed to a man like this I would be wary for the rest of our relationship.

Why? Because we all know men project so if they think women who sleep around are gross and evil what does that say about how we should view fuck boys or players in their perspective? Men tell on themselves all the time. And while this is a double standard I hold, I’ll never trust a man that was community dick in the past or present.

Getting them to commit doesn’t matter to me because I want a man different from the rest. I want a man who frequently practices due diligence and doesn’t let his dick rule his life. I want a man who is picky because I’ll always know he chose me because I was always his first choice. I want a man who vets just like I do.

And even though I don’t think a HVM would judge a woman for her sexual past, I do think he would see sex the same way as a HVW. I will never be impressed by relationships that start through hookups because I already disagree with the initial premises. A man even willing to initiate sex with me as a stranger is a man I’ll never want.

Edit: I also want to add that a lot of men think they’re picky because they use porn standards to pick women they think are deserving of commitment. However, they don’t implement these standards at all. A lot will sleep with anyone because they are not patient and have no impulse control. Once again, these are qualities I wouldn’t want in a longterm partner.