rubbing you with his boner to try to pressure you into sex isn't romantic or a turn on. he knows you have to get up early, he knows you need your sleep, and he had so much other time to initiate sex, so it is disrespectful and rape-y.

men that feel the need to keep stroking their dicks / jacking themselves off during sex with you to "stay hard" - it's a huge red flag and usually comes from porn sickness

men that say they will use a condom but then try to have foreplay naked in that area or get inside you and put on the condom later - huge NO. this is so risky. do not allow it and do not see him again.

men that pretend to not know the difference between your vagina and anus - especially if you have made it clear you do not want anal sex. almost every man I have been with tries to act dumb and like he "slips" or "doesn't realize" he is trying to put it in the wrong hole. he is just hoping to slip it in and have anal sex too.

one ex was so proud and kept telling me he had "magic fingers" and all he could do with fingers is go in and out, I was so disappointed. Of course expected a long, high effort blowjob right away.

some men do low effort / super quick foreplay for you just because they want a blowjob in return. scorekeeping in general is awful but scorekeeping like this in bed is worse.

"I can go for HOURS / so many rounds!" and him wanting to keep you up all night by doing more rounds especially when you are tired or need to get going is rape-y.

if he wants sex or to try something and he can see that you are hesitating he shouldn't keep pressuring you. if your answer isn't a clear, consenting "yes" he shouldn't keep on you because that is also rape.

stopping for whatever reason is okay! blowjobs after a while make my mouth super dry and I get really thirsty. he shouldn't make a big deal of it, complain, or anything. usually he needs the water too!

"You should wear *lingerie* / try this *k1nk* with me." if he says something out of the blue like that it can be his way of trying to wear you down and pressure you into doing what he wants. Pressure and manipulation isn't always obvious, he may be trying to get you to try some k1nk and slowly start saying compliments to you, telling you stories involving it and how much fun he had, saying he knows you and you'll like it, he may offer to buy you lingerie or what it requires and "take you shopping"

"stretching you out", "arch that back" "put that leg up" and calling you names, or slapping your butt even if he does it lightly and playfully are just degrading and stem from pornsickness. on the other hand men that try to say "you are so tight and feel so good" use this as a fake compliment but really it is a neg with awful implications.

"I Haven't had sex for a while" or "im out of shape" or "you're just so hot I cant control myself" or "it's just from the alcohol/whiskey dick" in regards to finishing fast are his way of saying he is pornsick.

lastly, stop having sex or giving a man blowjobs even when you don't feel in the mood. you do not owe him anything, especially sexually. if you do anything you need to 100% be consenting and you should be in the mood and enjoying it!