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AngryTiger69
[–]ThatIntention1FDS Newbie 200 points201 points202 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Only been with two men yet somehow feel like I’ve experienced this whole graph
[–]karabnpFDS Newbie 171 points172 points173 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
That’s it. That’s the field.😭 And “end up alone with cats” is thrown around like a punishment.😏 THAT’S A RELIEF AND A PRIZE, IN COMPARISON.
[–]LongirlFDS Newbie 83 points84 points85 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I’m reading this comment while laying in my clean bed with fluffy pillows, cat cuddled up to me, morning sunshine streaming through the window, birds singing outside, big night out planned with a group of friends to watch England play. I feel completely at ease. Living alone with cats is relaxing af.
[–]karabnpFDS Newbie 19 points20 points21 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That truly is the high life.🍾🥂
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 271 points272 points273 points 5 years ago (26 children) | Copy Link
I’m wondering if any other women here have a history of dating exclusively emotionally distant, avoidantly attached, manipulative men? My past pickmeisha self definitely had a type 😂
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Disciple 150 points151 points152 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Yup! Thankfully the manipulation part wasn’t most of them. I only dated one guy I’d call a real manipulator. But the avoidance? Emotional distance? Hoo boy yep. My type was ascetic, introverted nerds who I could have fascinating conversations with but who’d be uncomfortable showing any affection or emotion. My teenage boyfriend that became my ex husband used to drop my hand he was holding if anyone else could see us. Teen me thought I needed to become good enough to inspire passion in him. Christ. I dated another hot/cold type of ascetic, introverted nerd who went from adoring me and having an amazing soulmate connection to talking about other girls to me and telling me I wasn’t attractive after all, whoopsie.
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 101 points102 points103 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
This is so spot on. I can relate to every single bit of this, especially the feeling of having to win him over in order to get affection from him. It’s such a miserably lonely kind of relationship to have, and I’m so sorry to hear you’ve had to endure it. You deserve better. We all do.
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Disciple 105 points106 points107 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Oh I’m remarried now. He’s about as far from “ascetic, intellectual nerd” as one could be (still introverted though, we both are). He’s hot-blooded, passionate, he has my back, he’s funny and supportive, and I have never, EVER looked at him and thought “but does he…actually LOVE me?” I have never cried into my pillow at night, which sadly, was a common occurrence before. You’re right that it’s the loneliest relationship. With me ex, I felt like I was married to myself, because any passion to be had was generated by me, and through him by proxy, for me, as I was so love-starved that it became like using a spoon to save a sinking ship filling with water.
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That’s such great news! I’m so glad to hear you’re in a better place now in your marriage to a different partner. On a side note, I can completely relate to crying into your pillow at night. When I was still with my ex, I used to cry myself to sleep each night, and even though we shared the same bed, my ex didn’t even bother to notice. I truly regret staying in that relationship for as long as I did, and I was so blindly in love that I waited for HIM to break up with me, not the other way around. Ladies, please don’t make the same mistake! We all deserve so much better.
[–]Aksentia_IvanovitchaFDS Newbie 14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A friend of mine also had a guy who wouldnt hold her hand around other ppl.
[–]Platipus6FDS Apprentice 69 points70 points71 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
peter pan, parental seeker. eternal baby boy wants mummy with no needs of her own.
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 50 points51 points52 points 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
BINGO!!! The freaky Peter Pan “I don’t wanna grow up” complex, and with a doting pickme boy mom. You described my ex to a T!
[–]Platipus6FDS Apprentice 68 points69 points70 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10136107-how-to-spot-a-dangerous-man-before-you-get-involved
The workbook is amazing.
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you so much for including this link. I’m sure this will be a beneficial read not only to myself, but to countless other women here as well. I look forward to checking this out!
[–]BelleCervelleFDS Newbie 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is life-changing information, thank you!!! I just downloaded it!
This link by itself is worthy of being a post, photo priceless info!
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 169 points170 points171 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Girl I can't even begin to tell you. My "type" for years was skinny faux-woke softboi nerds with hella attachment issues who never cut the apron strings. I even married one.
One weird thing I noticed is they all had one brother. The birth order didn't matter, but something about a nuclear family with the only woman being a pickme boy mom is the perfect way to create this type.
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 72 points73 points74 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
You’ve got to be kidding, this is SCARILY accurate to all of my previous relationships. Are we the same person?
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 119 points120 points121 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We all drank the libfem kool-aid back then. My mom and stepmom are both major pickmes and TV shows and the culture at the time told us to leave the jocks and go for the awkward nerd eating lunch by himself because he'd appreciate the chance and treat us well. That's most definitely not the case.
[–]monch-bredFDS Newbie 64 points65 points66 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ope this is exactly my history, the top-left quadrant faux woke fuckboys 🥴 this is why I’m on a break from dating, I need to detox and reset my preferences lol!
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 78 points79 points80 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm over here tryin to manifest a Greek god who's been to therapy. That's the least I'll settle for at this point 😂
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 49 points50 points51 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Definitely think you’re onto something, there is always at least one brother 🧐
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 65 points66 points67 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I know, right! What is up with that? And don’t forget about the poor pickme boy mom who does all of the cooking, cleaning, laundry, and caters to her husband and sons’ every need.
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 67 points68 points69 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I hate these mothers. They think it’s cute to mollycoddle and enable their scrote sons, but it really comes across as pathetic and desperate.
[–]Gambit12345FDS Newbie 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🙋🏽♀️ I used to see it as a challenge to take a cold man and get him to open up emotionally. I literally did everything for my ex, went above and beyond way before I ever needed to, and this dude still couldn’t open up. The only time he did and showed any passion was when he was high. Told him why can’t you be this way sober? Some suspect he was on the spectrum. His mom made excuses for him saying he was never open with how he feels, as if I just needed to accept that’s how he was. Na. He was also covertly controlling and would make manipulative comments that eventually caused me to isolate and be with him only all the time, like I wouldn’t even post on social media at all. It happens so slowly you don’t even realize it!
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Me!! 🙋♀️ I can only imagine the shit you’ve been through. Those guys are straight up awful
[–]skylightshadedFDS Newbie 102 points103 points104 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The men that make you responsible for their emotional baggage are the worst. My last guy never took emotional responsibility for how he felt, just blamed me for not being what he wanted. So glad I wised up by the third date and cut that off early.
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Had this happen to me as well. His boss was treating him badly (which I’m sympathetic to). But then he’d tell me it was my duty as his girlfriend to make him happy and make his life better and I wasn’t trying hard enough.
And then he’d hold it against me that my work situation was overall good. Ranting about how I don’t understand him and I don’t know what it’s like to struggle and how I’m selfish because I’d come home from work too tired to be his therapist.
[–]Rebeccahu777 482 points483 points484 points 5 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
"Porn addicts" should be in the center to represent all 4 instead
[–]abstractsadgurlFDS Newbie 79 points80 points81 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sadly true
[–]aquarieuxFDS Newbie 93 points94 points95 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I was gonna say that this should be more of a Venn diagram, but even then it would just be one big circle so 🚶
[–]WestAtmosphereFDS Newbie 109 points110 points111 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
For sure, almost every man is a porn addict now in one way or another. A harsh reality but many would not be able to give up porn even if they claim to not be addicted lol.
[–]tonha_da_pamonhaFDS Apprentice 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We need a venn diagram
[–]LadyGrimesFDS Disciple 9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
YEP
[–]Ok-Performance5997FDS Newbie 299 points300 points301 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
At the very least, right wing men typically wear their misogyny on their sleeves. Many left wing men obscure their woke misogyny under the guise progressivism.
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 149 points150 points151 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I love it when they mansplain political issues to women 😂
Especially feminism
[–]maracat1989FDS Newbie 84 points85 points86 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I’ve dated all these men what do I win
[–]MagnfiqueMaleficentFDS Disciple 55 points56 points57 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The knowledge you need to avoid these soul suckers again in the future. The gift that keeps giving. 🎁
[–]maracat1989FDS Newbie 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Know what’s sad though? I never figured that shit out on my own, I was so lost in pickmeville. FDS what actually helped me
[–]iloveyoubabiFDS Newbie 22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My ex is the entire right side of that graph, lol.
[–]fireforestfairyFDS Apprentice 20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Which is why it's perfectly ok to stay single. These men will just add more problems to your life.
[–]PornruinedsocietyFDS Disciple 16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My ex was the whole graph, minus the gym bro part. Performative woke sensitive nerd, narcissistic, emotionally distant manipulator and porn addict. But he was skinny and hated the gym.
[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple 88 points89 points90 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Where are the narc gym bros? The dysfunctional, sexist nerd men are EVERYWHERE.
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 44 points45 points46 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Lol you can find them at college frat parties, Wall Street, sports games, etc
[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple 26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That explains a lot. I never went to any of those things. Lol.
[–]CatherineWinkworthThrowaway Account 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I need to know the labels on these axis, please
[–]inventivesquidFDS Newbie 18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It’s from the Political Compass. Top is authoritarian, bottom is libertarian, left is economic left, right is economic right
[–]darling89FDS Newbie 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is sadly accurate
[–]palanuikFDS Newbie 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is a perfect taxonomy of the options in my experience 🤣
[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie 28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep, this just about covers it 😅
[–]Antique_Fortune6974FDS Newbie 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The nerds are pretty much the whole bottom half..sighs in estrogen
[–]user10i8opFDS Newbie 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
lol even my grandpa said what's wrong with men today lol, he told me you are better off without a boyfriend.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]spinsterchachkiesFDS Disciple 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They are all porn addicts
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[–]ThatIntention1FDS Newbie 200 points201 points202 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]karabnpFDS Newbie 171 points172 points173 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]LongirlFDS Newbie 83 points84 points85 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]karabnpFDS Newbie 19 points20 points21 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 271 points272 points273 points (26 children) | Copy Link
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Disciple 150 points151 points152 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 101 points102 points103 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Disciple 105 points106 points107 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 51 points52 points53 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Aksentia_IvanovitchaFDS Newbie 14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Platipus6FDS Apprentice 69 points70 points71 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 50 points51 points52 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Platipus6FDS Apprentice 68 points69 points70 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 16 points17 points18 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BelleCervelleFDS Newbie 13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 169 points170 points171 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 72 points73 points74 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 119 points120 points121 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]monch-bredFDS Newbie 64 points65 points66 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]whiskey_and_oreosFDS Newbie 78 points79 points80 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 49 points50 points51 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]IShallBeMyOwnMuseThrowaway Account 65 points66 points67 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 67 points68 points69 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Gambit12345FDS Newbie 11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]__kamikaze__FDS Newbie 23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]skylightshadedFDS Newbie 102 points103 points104 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 40 points41 points42 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Rebeccahu777 482 points483 points484 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]abstractsadgurlFDS Newbie 79 points80 points81 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]aquarieuxFDS Newbie 93 points94 points95 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]WestAtmosphereFDS Newbie 109 points110 points111 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]tonha_da_pamonhaFDS Apprentice 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]LadyGrimesFDS Disciple 9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Ok-Performance5997FDS Newbie 299 points300 points301 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 149 points150 points151 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]maracat1989FDS Newbie 84 points85 points86 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]MagnfiqueMaleficentFDS Disciple 55 points56 points57 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]maracat1989FDS Newbie 12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]iloveyoubabiFDS Newbie 22 points23 points24 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]fireforestfairyFDS Apprentice 20 points21 points22 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PornruinedsocietyFDS Disciple 16 points17 points18 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple 88 points89 points90 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AngryTiger69FDS Newbie[S,🍰] 44 points45 points46 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple 26 points27 points28 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CatherineWinkworthThrowaway Account 11 points12 points13 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]inventivesquidFDS Newbie 18 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]darling89FDS Newbie 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]palanuikFDS Newbie 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie 28 points29 points30 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Antique_Fortune6974FDS Newbie 8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]user10i8opFDS Newbie 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]spinsterchachkiesFDS Disciple 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link