This man confirmed that if he hasn’t proposed WITHIN 3 years, he DOESN’T WANT TO MARRY YOU. Please leave the men who don’t do everything they can to be with you! No forever girlfriends here!

myousername · 2021-01-08T22:54:16+00:00

I've never understood having an argument where the goal is to make a man propose to you. Let alone multiple arguments. Why on earth would you want to marry a man who has to be forced into it?

These "arguments" SHOULD be going something like this:

Her: "Hey babe we've been together X years, why haven't you proposed to me?"

Him: [generic excuses]

Her: I see. So you're not yet sure I'm "the one"? If you're not sure, that means I'm probably not. Being together for more time isn't going to change that. Let's break up now so I can go find someone else who will be my "the one".

/aaaand scene/

Ladies, stop being such cowards about breaking up. If you're going to have this conversation with your boyfriend, you have to be willing to break up with him if he doesn't want the same things as you.

chasingastarl1ght · 2021-01-08T22:25:04+00:00

The girl. You think she woke up for real?

coolestgirlyoueverme · 2021-01-09T01:00:50+00:00

Ok....so then if HE knows you want to get married and KNOWS he doesn't want it with you, then why can't be just do the right thing and end it so the woman can be free...... :/

laughingatsalad · 2021-01-08T23:41:05+00:00

Hes right but it annoys me that he pretends not to know why these women dont ”get it”. Men lie about and future fake all the time and he is ignoring that men use women or he does not know other men as well as he thinks he does

Fitncurly · 2021-01-09T00:58:02+00:00

This is true. The only exception is for youth (pre-college/college)where it’ll be next to impossible to secure the funds for a married life—in which case all parties should be focusing on leveling up, not dating seriously. In my case we were college sweethearts and he proposed at about the 4 year mark—right after graduation and he got some good work experience under his belt. He was a provider from even before that (my job was bad for my mental health at the time and so I quit and he paid the bills), but he wanted to be sure to be able to really be able to afford a family. We got married a year from then and then had our first child a year from that.

The dragging out of time is purely to selfishly keep a woman on the back- burner while trying to hold out for someone better. My husband told me he could see us spending our lives together after the first year. It’s been 17, and I got a diamond promise ring the second year when we were in college to show he was serious before the official proposal. Don’t be a forever girlfriend ladies, you’re worth more than that.

UnpeacefulLily · 2021-01-08T23:43:36+00:00

My limit is 2 years. If you don't know by the 2nd anniversary, then it's time to keep it moving.

PollyAnnaSunshine · 2021-01-09T01:50:36+00:00

Agree with this. Got engaged after almost two years dating and a couple of big fights about the "concept of marriage". My ex would always say he wanted to "be with me" but that he was against marriage due to his parents' divorce and his dad's subsequent awful relationship.

After my grandmother died I was devastated that she wouldn't be able to see me get married and basically told him our relationship wasn't moving forward if we weren't engaged within a certain timeframe, and would in fact be ending.

Following that, he went through the motions of ring shopping with me, bought me an expensive ring that we designed together, and even planned a surprise proposal and engagement party so I thought that maybe I had gotten through to him.

Nope, he really is against marriage and I ended up dumping him because of the same dysfunctional family that he claims caused him to hate it, and the same selfishness that allowed him to tell me he wanted to "be with me" but not marry me.

I will not get engaged again until I have a proposal from someone who doesn't need to be told the point of marriage, or be convinced about it. It is just not worth it.

spicyspa · 2021-01-09T03:13:52+00:00

Why do we place so much value into their picking us to begin with when marriage is worse for women than it is for men? Okay the one benefit is that society thinks you're a better person because you're married as though the marriage is a higher plane of existence. That's it. Why do men run from something that benefits them the most? Women should be running away from marriage.

softestbean · 2021-01-09T01:39:44+00:00

Of course the guy is putting blame on women. Not like staying in a relationship while knowing you don’t want a future with them and just using then in meantime is manipulative or abusive or anything.

Savorycorncake · 2021-01-08T22:11:13+00:00

Three years is about 1.5 years too long IMO

souredskittles · 2021-01-09T01:28:18+00:00

AND THATS THE TEA SISTERS

exhalefierceness · 2021-01-09T16:56:34+00:00

When me and my ex made a year together I told him that one day I want to get married.

Years started passing and no ring.

His responses?

“I don’t believe in marriage”

“It’s just a piece of paper”

“I don’t want you to steal my money”

“I never want to get married”

“Marriage is dumb”

ALSO

“I don’t know if you’d be a good mother, you’re too childish”

“Until you change I’ll consider marriage”

Those 7 years spent together involved him cheating on me a couple times, and ending up in an abusive relationship that nearly destroyed my mental health.

I’m so glad I left him before it got worse.

n3rdgir7 · 2021-01-08T22:29:16+00:00

[deleted]

lejean · 2021-01-09T04:48:45+00:00

Honestly, I just go by the mantra that if you've been dating for 2 years and he still hasn't proposed, he never will. This of course only applies if you're in your mid-late 20s or older.

2021-01-09T04:55:52+00:00

I hope she didn’t put that ring back on after the video.

Ancient-Cucumber · 2021-01-09T21:10:00+00:00

I think it's true. I dated a guy and 1.5-2 years into the relationship he started talking about marriage and having a family with me. (I left him because he kept doing some things I deeply disliked.)

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