Invisible

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-01-31T11:39:31+00:00

No incl content

NarniaFox · 2022-01-31T06:08:37+00:00

"I avoid women of my age, troll them, inconvenience them, think they want to manipulate or use me" - are you really surprised that you don't have any positive experience with them?

If you really can't help but feel used/manipulated, I'd advise you to go on therapy. It seems similar to the problem when a person thinks that everyone laughs at them, everyone is here to get them etc. You aren't as important as you think, most men and women usually don't care much for others they don't know well and if you don't make any attempts to get close to them, they keep not caring for you.

You might be stuck in a negative loop - you feel ignored, you ignore others, treat them poorly and in return you really do get ignored and treated poorly. You might have been not popular among women before that, sure, but your current attitude just makes it worse.

Also mind that social medias give you the content you spend most time on. If you started watching some videos about women bitching about men, it doesn't make these women into the majority even though your feed is full of them, it's algorithms filtering for your rage binging.

So if you do want to get out of this loop, you should try out therapy (look at CBT) and stop consuming the content that reinforces this mindset.

cjt11203 · 2022-01-31T06:57:12+00:00

Just focus on living your life with integrity and don't assume someone has bad intentions towards you unless they give you a reason to believe otherwise. The red flags are usually present early on.

My rule of thumb is to don't be a dick no matter who I am interacting with.

SupermarketFun21 · 2022-01-31T07:25:50+00:00

You want these people to notice you in a positive way... and you behave like this?

Due to this I only talk to older women and try to ignore women in my age range when possible, inconvenience them, or just don’t help them at all.

...

Sometimes women my age are persistent or don’t get the hint I don’t really wanna talk to them, so I act somewhat normal and talk to them but I just ask them troll questions or make them the butt of jokes around other coworkers or guy friends.

I have a pretty easy question for you: Is this behavior likely to make the problem better or worse?

Unique-Highway-2845 · 2022-01-31T07:34:02+00:00

Are you in university and women are trying to build a rapport with you to get you to do their homework for them / tutor them for free? That's about the only situation I can think of where your story actually makes sense and is plausible.

2022-01-31T06:36:03+00:00

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2022-01-31T06:03:28+00:00

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neetykeeno · 2022-01-31T09:01:23+00:00

Well...why do you want to stop thinking like this? To get a girlfriend or to stop being such a douche to strangers...or both?

-passepar2t- · 2022-01-31T07:03:24+00:00

When women my age try to talk to me I can’t help but think they’re trying to manipulate me or using me for their own gain like building rapport with me to get me to do things for them or something. Sometimes women my age are persistent or don’t get the hint I don’t really wanna talk to them, so I act somewhat normal and talk to them but I just ask them troll questions or make them the butt of jokes around other coworkers or guy friends.

So you're not invisible and in fact you're pushing them away first? Is that what you're telling me here?

ItIsnt0verYet · 2022-01-31T06:30:33+00:00

So youre mean to people and are upset that you're having bad experiences...?

JacobMoogberg69 · 2022-01-31T08:32:57+00:00

There are three things that you need in order to be successful with women. The key concept here is that you have sole responsibility over yourself. When women react to you like you are invisible it is because you believe yourself to be invisible. Women are just reacting to what you sub-communicate. Lots of men walk around having delusions of inadequacy which translates to them being treated as worthless by everyone else.

So here are the three things you absolutely must have:

Love and respect yourself. It means if you came across a copy of yourself, you should be ecstatic to be this person's best friend. Feel good enough, feel good. You cannot expect others to like you if you do not like yourself.
You must love women. Whatever resentment and anger you have towards women? Let it go. Yes, it sucks that you were ignored and even taken advantage of. Realize that no woman is responsible for you being a wimp and a nice guy. Learn to appreciate women for who they are. This doesn't mean excusing bad behavior or tolerating disrespect.
You must be okay and comfortable wjth making decisions and leading. Meaning taking all the responsibility for what you do, where you go out, etc. don't expect women to make any decisions. Start making decisions for them. Male chauvinistic? Sure, but who cares. How has feminized dating advice worked out for you?

Tiny-Pigeonss · 2022-01-31T06:58:32+00:00

I mean you admitted here that you have a bad personality so maybe that's a good place to start.

DianeticDelight · 2022-01-31T05:50:25+00:00

Are you invisible to them or are you turning them down? What are you actually saying here?

hungarian_builder · 2022-01-31T07:44:40+00:00

With age it will change. It's not just your mindset but also your situation. You are beginning your life, thus I assume you do not have a lot of resources to go with. Most women love what you can do for them in this age. Time is on your side, if you do not have the outstanding looks. Later girls (or at least a good portion of them) will realize that they can't tie down a top tier male so they decrease their standards to a realistic one. A few hits against their egos is all that it takes. Just wait for "chads" doing what they are the best at. Sad, but this is reality. Some of them might not change, so beware with that. Around here the turn comes at the age of 25 roughly (so you are 25 and the girl is 22 basically)

pikecat · 2022-01-31T09:16:21+00:00

Your making a logical error in your thinking. The actions of some women is not representative of every woman.

You can't say that every woman who talks to you is going to be like some other one. They are all different with different ideas.

Further, if you expect certain motivations in the women that you meet, you will interpret their actions as being in some way related to your expectation. This way you will miss the very thing that you want when you do find it.

A negative outlook begets a negative outcome. You reap what you sow.

A positive outlook would change it around for you. You would then ignore and not notice those whose motivation you dislike and focus on those who have what you want.

Searching for what you want is just that, a search. No one hands you what you want, women don't exist to serve your needs. No one is going to adopt the character that you want, just because you want it.

If you want something, you have to work to attain it. If you are not looking for the woman who has what you want, you will never find it.

2022-01-31T06:40:00+00:00

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nick1812216 · 2022-01-31T06:21:40+00:00

I feel the same way, totally invisible to the opposite gender! I can’t get the time of day out of most women. Still though, you oughtta be nice to people OP.

Laytheblameonluck · 2022-01-31T06:18:41+00:00

It's most likely your circumstances, e.g. if you are studying and poor, I would not take the attitude of other women personally, they are usually rich and entitled, instead focus on getting out of your circumstances, e.g. take a year off and travel and meet women from other cultures.

Keep fit, earn money, build yourself.

Once you've got value, don't give it away.

Lateralanouncer · 2022-01-31T06:07:30+00:00

Last weekend i 42m was out fishing in my boat at one of my favorite spots. Heaps of boats out, heaps of young men spairfishing living and having an awesome time. Reminded me of when I was younger. Fuck being a man is fucking awesome bro and your worried about being Invisible to a ....

TryLambda · 2022-01-31T08:59:41+00:00

Being invisible to women is the ultimate dream for Mgtow, have you thought of being mgtow?

Smitten_Squire · 2022-01-31T05:56:47+00:00

How are your looks? Face, height, hair, ect.

You probably seem too "safe" and have zero sex appeal to them. Like a nice guy. They don't like that look and vibe

caption291 · 2022-01-31T09:47:30+00:00

"If you just trusted women it would all be fine. You just need to trust them more."

Sounds a whole lot like what scammers tell you when they want you to continue giving them money despite not giving you anything in return.

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BruddaMSK · 2022-01-31T09:27:21+00:00

Well if you have luck with older women then good for you, but usually they ignore men who are younger even more than those within your age.

MarBitt · 2022-01-31T09:55:23+00:00

Keep it simple. Do what you want. Don't be a dick.

Do you want to talk to her? Talk. Don't you want to talk to her? Don't talk.

You gave her a hint, that you didn't want to talk... No! Too complicated. Keep it simple.
You're trolling her so she'll understand... No! Too complicated. Keep it simple.
You want to talk to her, but you're afraid of... No! Too complicated. Keep it simple.

She's asking for your help. Do you want to help her? Help. Don't you want to help her? Don't help.

You want to help her, but only if... Complicated. Keep it simple.
You think she wants you to help her because... Complicated. Keep it simple.

Do you see? When you are honest with yourself and keep everything simple, life is easier. Being simple is a great power.

Your only job is to know what you want and do it. Live your own life. Who wrote what on TikTok - leave it to the horses.They have much bigger heads than you. .o)

Keep it simple.

SaltyFatNuts · 2022-01-31T10:12:20+00:00

I have a similar issue only I have a hard time pursuing women but Majority of my closest friends are actually women the only time I ever have trouble talking to women when it comes to dating I don’t judge women and would even regard myself a feminist but I can’t help whenever I’m on a date to feel like I’m being severely judged and whatnot

MarBitt · 2022-01-31T10:19:27+00:00

What are some ways I can possibly change my mindset?

Every day, do something nice for random girl/woman your age to help her. Do not expect anything in return, no thanks or gratitude.

logiauser · 2022-01-31T11:27:55+00:00

Don’t worry, you’ll feel the same in your 30s too. It’s evolutionary. We do not think the same. A woman’s interest in you, for anything other than short term, is predicated on what she can leverage from that relationship.

Stop bullying people though. That’s just toxic.

Edit: it’s funny to me how people can’t separate the two strains of thought and are only picking and attacking the one that offends them.

Maybe he got this toxic after realizing that women are just using him?

bluehorserunning · 2022-01-31T11:37:40+00:00

OP: Women my own age try to avoid talking to me unless they need something

Also OP: when a woman my own age talks to me, I'm deliberately rude and trollish to make them go away asap.

Well, DUH. Of course people don't want to talk to you, until they absolutely can't avoid it because they need you to do your job/your part of an assignment, when you're deliberately being a jackass towards them.

You don't have to like them, but if you're less of a deliberate jackass maybe someone might talk to you voluntarily.

Title	Invisible
Author	Hawkoflight2021
Upvotes	14
Comments	95
Date	January 31, 2022 5:46 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/sgtppf/invisible/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/invisible.1098782 https://theredarchive.com/post/1098782

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