~ archived since 2018 ~

Pointing out obvious info

EvilBananaManRD · 2017-12-07T13:35:04+00:00

Going through PPD I found this:...

EvilBananaManRD

December 7, 2017

14 upvotes

/r/PurplePillDebate

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Post Information

Title	Pointing out obvious info
Author	EvilBananaManRD
Upvotes	14
Comments	115
Date	December 7, 2017 1:35 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7i6hkp/pointing_out_obvious_info/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/pointing-out-obvious-info.264564 https://theredarchive.com/post/264564

Comments

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans15 points16 points17 points 8 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]EvilBananaManRDNot caring anymore[S] 3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Entropy-7Old Goat0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]LewisCross 1 points1 points1 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]LewisCross 4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SkookumTreeWe are DONE with "cope"2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]WhiskersNTreddish purp8 points9 points10 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliechallita2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Mr_SmoogsThe 2nd most obnoxious poster here4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (28 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans5 points6 points7 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Mr_SmoogsThe 2nd most obnoxious poster here0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]eliechallita1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Mr_SmoogsThe 2nd most obnoxious poster here0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]says_harsh_thingsRed Pill - Chad3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]pinkgoldrose5 points6 points7 points 8 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]says_harsh_thingsRed Pill - Chad6 points7 points8 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]notworthmuch20xx 3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]newName543456went volcel1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]pinkgoldrose0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]newName543456went volcel1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]pinkgoldrose0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]newName543456went volcel0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]pinkgoldrose0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]newName543456went volcel1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]pinkgoldrose1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Mr_SmoogsThe 2nd most obnoxious poster here1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]the_calibre_cat3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm not fully convinced men can be only friends with young, attractive women.

I think they can be, but it requires active suppression of desire - to the point where it is seldom worth it. I'm friends with a girl I'm super attracted to, and I'm pretty damn sure there's nothing there. I don't want to be the guy that's like, "Well, you're not fucking me, so get the fuck out of my life," but I'm definitely trying to reduce the amount of time I see her and interact with her... because I have my own damn sanity to maintain and I'm not going to do that with her bouncing around my house in her yoga pants.

I doubt if women will ever really "get" it, least of all with plenty of bluepillers assuring them that there are plenty of men who don't experience raw, instinctual desire towards them and can really think of them as "one of the guys." The guy that actually thinks of her as "one of the guys" won't get any, the guys who are trying mostly won't get any, but one of 'em probably will - because he'll be forward about his desires and conventionally masculine and attractive, and she'll fuck him.

[–]eliechallita2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]the_calibre_cat1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]notworthmuch20xx 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]the_calibre_cat0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm a nerd in my solitude but I don't seek nerdism in my social time. I have nerd friends who code and play video games, but I don't maintain the relationship much because there's no personal bond, they keep it perfectly platonic and it includes that they filter their emotions and their personal life. The few deep friendships I had with men were perfectly normal non-nerd friends who were into sport, activities and were talking about their life and emotions to me and listened me in return.

I'm married with a kid and my nerd friends are 30 year old wizards, I sometimes feel like they're babies next to me in term of personal development and this is frustrating.

My wife is nowhere a nerd, she tried to play some video games with me but quickly gave up, she doesn't even want to hear about my projects and interests and dismiss it as too complicated or way too fucken ridicule (bitch you know how much hours I spent to get that ridiculous result? ;_; )

Have never met a hot nerd, but I'm worried they may be high maintenance. The few women I know who code are not passionate, they're balanced people who aim to be in management jobs, nowhere nerds. :(

[–]Maikowski2 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]wtknightHardcore Romantic4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Orange_Paisley3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SlimLovinHigh Value to Own the Libs1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Afroaway002 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Rockase13Ask me if I'm Chad0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Butt-Factory1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]AutoModeratorBiased against humans[M] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]BothWaysItGoesLibertarian0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]notworthmuch20xx 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]LoomisKnows0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Entropy-7Old Goat0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss 1 points1 points1 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]LittleknownfactsVaguely Uncivil Comment4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss 1 points1 points1 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]LittleknownfactsVaguely Uncivil Comment1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]LittleknownfactsVaguely Uncivil Comment0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]LittleknownfactsVaguely Uncivil Comment2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Shazoa4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (47 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (44 children) | Copy Link

[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman6 points7 points8 points 8 years ago (43 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (42 children) | Copy Link

[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman7 points8 points9 points 8 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link

[–]wracky272RPG's are fun8 points9 points10 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Do have long-term female friends that you consciously care about with no ulterior motives?

No. The few I had, I had no affection to them, only sexual tension. And I don't maintain friendship with women I am not attracted to.

It seems to me men have more trouble separating the two when it comes to platonic friendship. Hence the friend zone.

Well I can have sexual attraction without affection, that's something most women have said was impossible to them, and they felt like I was an alien for stating so, it's not even some TRP thing, it's what I'm told and it's what I see.

But affection without sexual attraction? I had that for men, not women, as I said.

You quote the friendzone and that's interesting. Friendzone happens because men try to approach women with clear intent in their head but they don't display it, friendzone is not something that appears because the man wanted to be friend and fell in love, he was in love before already, so it's not a really good example.

But on the otherside, I've seen plenty of men getting friendzoned, and affection was nowhere to be found from the woman. She just profits from them and display codified affection to make the orbitered man compliant.

[–]wracky272RPG's are fun3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]wracky2722 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]haunting-you 1 points1 points1 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

So tell me, since you're a woman. What does affection toward a platonic male friend feels like?

not the person you replied to, but... i'm happy to see them, i enjoy conversation with them, cracking jokes and so on. it's a pleasant, happy feeling to have their company.

Do you have long term male friends?

yes.

Do you care about their feelings deep down there?

like, deep down inside or in their pants? the latter, no, because we're friends and that would be weird.

Are you eager to hug them and feel the warmth of their body, the softness of their skin?

no, weird.

Do you get your dose of oxytocin with them despite having no will to have sex with them? i guess, if that's what explains the enjoyment of their company. never thought that hard about it.

Or on the contrary, are they physically disgusting to you?

they aren't disgusting, no. they're normal guys.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for answering in honesty. :)

like, deep down inside or in their pants? the latter, no, because we're friends and that would be weird.

No D: I mean, I don't care for most people's feelings, I care for our relationship to keep as usual, I don't have empathy for them whatsoever. But I care about my wife's feelings, I am worried to waste her time, to make her regret her choices, to influence her into doing things that would make me hate myself.

I want to hug her, to touch her, to talk shit with her, I'm filterless most of the time and have no stress.

There has been male friends to who I had these sort of feelings, but since affective behaviours between men are scarcer, I unconsciously react by randomly punching and fighting them.

With women? It's harder to tell because there's always sexual tension from my side. I am usually not interested in being friend with women, because if they're not attractive ,I don't have a single incentive to maintain the relationship, and if she's attractive, then I don't really have platonic friendship in mind....

Women with men? I have legitimately never acknowledged what could look like affection from a woman platonically to a man. I saw lot of men being literal orbiters, only here to serve attention and validation or even services, get nothing back, affection is merely a compliance tool. If there's affection, to me, then there's sexual tension too, I spotted several cheaters or soon-to-be cheaters that way.

Are you eager to hug them and feel the warmth of their body, the softness of their skin? no, weird.

Then hugging them is merely a codified behaviour and is not rooted in affection.

[–]haunting-you 1 points1 points1 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link

[–]GinSmokeLies 6 points7 points8 points 8 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Women don't linearly associate touch with sex. That's why girls want to "just cuddle" and get mad when their boyfriend goes for their boobs or their vag. For guys, cuddling leads to sexy thoughts. For girls, cuddling is an end to itself.

My life experience actually reflect the contrary. I like to touch my wife's breast and vag while cuddling but she understands none of this is loaded with sexual intention, I just like to do it. But she's the one that is really more easily turned on by cuddling than me.

So in the end you can probably say that I project my wife on all women, but not really myself.

I'm 29 years old and when I visit my parents I will watch TV in bed with my mom. Sometimes I'll put my head on her shoulder or something like that. It's warm and comforting and provides happy feels, but it's not sexual. Women hugging/cuddling their female friends is like this. It's more of a familial bond than a sexual one.

Yeah, the women I know who are very touchy touchy with other women ended up being bisexuals. :/ I don't doubt that's a thing, but I've not witnessed genuine female friendly touching.

I used to give affection to my mother, but generally I'm mostly doing it to comfort her, because she needs it, I actually dislike it. My mother think I'm affectionate because I just never rejected her gestures. By saying that I realize she's borderline abusive because if I reject her she'll guilt me... :/

[–]crumblesnatch3 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I don't doubt that's a thing, but I've not witnessed genuine female friendly touching.

You might've, and not noticed. My younger sister and I have a very close, affectionate relationship. We often hug and kiss cheeks, and hold hands when we're walking. Passers-by definitely think we're lesbians. We're not!

She's really the only woman I'm touchy-feely with. We'll cuddle under a blanket, drink from the same cup, I'll stroke her hair and kiss her head when she's sad etc. I think it doesn't feel weird with her specifically because I've been doing those things since she was born, and the feelings are the same. Family love, not sexual.

I've hugged/cuddled most of my female friends at some point, though. I've also had a totally non-sexual naked shower with a female friend. I think this is one of those things that guys might have a hard time wrapping their head around -- women can be physically affectionate without any sexual motive whatsoever.

[–]goatismycopilot3 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]goatismycopilot2 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss2 points 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I understand what you mean, all this is rooted in false consensus bias and it's something that is omnipresent in here from both sides and it's legitimate to call it out on me.

But I've been continuing this discussion because I'm doubtful about my own POV and want it challenged. Sadly, your (read all of you) words do not challenge my view, I can't do anything but either reject your experience in favour or mine and of the witnesses of IRL female friends who successfully challenged my view, or just believe you blindly and rejecting my own experience and the witnesses. Or, just like I do, I can try to dig in more and try to get the nuances you try to make.

Some people are unaware of themselves, some people are aware and can't express it so people of the other gender can understand, I don't reject fault on anyone for this, it's classical difficult communication... And it should not be alien like to you if you spend time here, it's not uncommon that men complain that women's advice aren't efficient at telling them the nuances. And I know plenty of typical thing women say to men that are going to be misunderstood by the man or which are typically misunderstood by the woman herself. "I like naturally muscular men", "He just has to get it", "be confident, be yourself"...

Eastie

Eastusis /u/littleknownfacts

Oh boi I'm getting nicknames, not sure if it means I'm getting adopted or if I'm getting maternalized and reduced. :O

[–]Eastuss1 point 8 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]KerPop42Neo was trans1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]says_harsh_thingsRed Pill - Chad-1 points0 points1 point 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]KerPop42Neo was trans2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]goatismycopilotPurple Pill Woman1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Maikowski2 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link