Why can't mail order brides be a solution to men with low SMV?

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-05-18T22:54:50+00:00

They can who's stopping them

Jakub-Jakub · 2019-05-19T03:29:55+00:00

Why would you want to marry someone from an entirely different culture from you, who only wants your money? What kind of shitty life is that?

If you just want sex, a prostitute is cheaper and easier. If you want companionship and love, you're not going to get that with some rando filipino goldigger. It's probably still easier to find that with a local woman.

Divorce rates don't tell us the full story. These marriages could be just as unhappy as others, but the woman doesn't feel as free to divorce because of unfamiliarity with her new country. I guess in that sense it's better for the man, idk

geyges · 2019-05-18T23:19:10+00:00

Mail order brides is just dating service where both parties know exactly what they want.

Desperate girls from shitty countries are tired of living in filth, and want better QOL for themselves and their children.

Guys just seek companionship from good looking women.

Perfect arrangement, and no mystery that it works out well most times. It somehow sounds dirtier than casual hookups, but its infinitely more natural, and mirrors how marriages always worked.

MoodyBrizo · 2019-05-19T01:09:09+00:00

Same reasons prostitutes aren't a solution. Men want validation and love.

reluctantly_red · 2019-05-18T23:00:21+00:00

You think foreign women want these losers?

Zippo-Cat · 2019-05-19T04:23:32+00:00

Simplest answer is "AWALT"

More complicated answer is this: once you "import" your mail order bride, eventually she'll get acclimated, notice and embrace all the freedoms and culture other women in the country enjoy, and dump/divorce your incel ass when she realizes she can do leagues better.

To begin with mail order brides could only really work if it was the MAN who moves to the poor country. But of course that will not happen because in a poor country he'd be poor himself. There's very few jobs that let you live in a shithole but earn money in the first world simultaneously.

blackedoutfast · 2019-05-19T06:17:19+00:00

the kind of guys who get mail order brides are the exact same kind of guys who put up with some bitchy nagging wife who is always cucking him and spending all of his money on stupid shit. and bringing over all of her relatives and expecting him to support them.

the reason these marriages last longer isn't because they're better, it's because the men involved are too desperate and weak to get a divorce

GridReXX · 2019-05-19T01:40:29+00:00

I wish they would go and do it.

Those women may not want to fuck him and may not love him and may even think he's ugly as shit and beta as fuck, but at the very least she'll be grateful to him for rescuing her from her shithole circumstances, so she'll grin and bear it and focus on building a loving family unit.

Sounds like Marriage 1.0^TM to me!

Bonus: You'll get kids! For many men having a legacy is a value-add to enriching their human existence. And if you're a good father and husband, your kids will love you the way a mother loves a child -- "unconditionally."

FlavFal · 2019-05-19T00:52:12+00:00

It can be, I'm in South America and plenty of women would love that.

NockerJoe · 2019-05-19T01:38:36+00:00

Men and women both get shamed for taking extrordinary measures because its percieved as a failure to do things in a pre approved way. However all parties involved must understand the other team generally doesn't do favors and is discouraged to. If you need to take those measures thats what you gotta do.

sparksjoy · 2019-05-19T03:07:13+00:00

One word: Americanization.

Pretty much all American men we know who went the MOB route say their wives started out shy and docile but pretty much became another person after a couple years in the states. For some they see that as a good/attractive thing and actually like that she's coming out of her shell and becoming more feisty. Others say they miss the old days but probably don't bother divorcing because the MOBs are often SAHMs and can take them to the cleaners if a divorce happens and they don't really have an abundance to draw new potential wives from outside of going through the whole process again.

marriage_is_hell · 2019-05-19T04:00:56+00:00

Its basically signing up for a divorce.

wotsittoyou · 2019-05-19T20:49:25+00:00

Well... a lot of low value men are just in general low value so I'm guessing that a great many of them are locked out of effectively using such an option due to cost. But other than that well sure, knock yourself out.

Might want to remember though, a woman who agrees to go marry and fuck a man she barely knows then go reside with him in a country whose ways are not the ways of her people, all in return for some theoretical increase in her standard of living (theoretical because things can be awful too in developed countries if your partner is a pathetic example of our species) is likely to be naturally somewhat whore-ish. I mean just saying. You gotta wonder, right? If you had a daughter, you did your best to raise her right she finished a bit of college then got a job and one day out of the blue she grabbed her things and said "seeya mum and dad I'm off to Dubai to marry an oil billionaire who saw me on a website and promises me diamonds and fancy cars" you'd have an opinion about what she was wouldn't you? Same for those mail order girls. They are going to not be average girls of their country and culture.

DaphneDK42 · 2019-05-19T02:38:26+00:00

They are. I keep bringing them up as the solution to the legions of incels haunting Reddit. The problem with those types of people though, has a lot to do with having a very low tolerance for risk. Going to the Phillipines is seen as being extremely dangerous and suspect.

Also, lol to the first sentence: "While there is little demand among foreign men for American wives, there is a huge demand for American husbands."

And: "Heaven is having a Japanese wife, a Chinese cook, a British country home and an American salary. Hell, on the other hand, is having a Chinese salary, a British cook, a Japanese house and an American wife."

Really putting American Wives in the spotlight here.

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87AudreyHorne · 2019-05-19T03:26:18+00:00

How does that look more appealing to anyone rather than just being single?

meomeowmeoww · 2019-05-19T03:46:55+00:00

Even losers have their pride.

Plopolok · 2019-05-19T09:25:06+00:00

I think letting men immigrate to Filipinas to live and work there would be better.

(Unfortunately, trying to discuss this possibility on ppd is "too political" for the mods).

welcometothejl · 2019-05-19T10:42:30+00:00

I joined an international dating app and the difference is night and day. It's not that I haven't found anyone on dating apps here, it's just that I haven't matched with anyone worth settling down with. They usually have a combination of the following problems for me, poor health, lackluster personality, financial stress, and prescription or recreational drug dependency. The market here is a cold reality check for a guy like me, and that's ok. Luckily there is another market. International women initiate and drive conversations, they're healthier, they aren't pumped full of prescription drugs, they can appreciate what I bring to the table, and of course, they're beautiful. Being a man on an international dating app is what I imagine being a woman in a dating app here is like. It's great!

mydikishomofobik · 2019-05-19T12:10:57+00:00

They can travel to poorer countries, meet attractive young women and get laid. And if they meet one they really like, they can marry her. Mail order bride agencies seem to be expensive and unnecessary when you can put in a little more effort and just go looking for women yourself at a cheaper price. I guess the agencies are for men who have money to spend but want to avoid too much hassle.

And, let's be honest, the stigma against it probably comes from jealousy. Women don't like the idea of men spending resources on hotter women instead of spending time and money on them. Even if they're not interested in the men, they don't mind taking their time and money. And men are jealous to see other men who they see as lesser than them getting attractive women.

katymarx · 2019-05-19T14:05:16+00:00

I know 30+ women from Russia,Ukraine, etc who came here as mail order brides or got green card married to stay here and none of them are with the original men she married. That being said, only a small % of women from former Soviet countries are eager to be MOB, although it does seem like a lot based on the websites.

That being said these are people I know from the local Russian community. What I found is many American men who brought in brides tended to isolate them so there may still be some intact marriages where she is not interested in or allowed to be a part of the russian-speaking social community here.

KikiYuyu · 2019-05-19T17:06:32+00:00

How is having a shady almost certainly doomed marriage going to improve anything?

prostate-apostate · 2019-05-19T21:35:26+00:00

They are better off getting a trap gf .

YetAnotherCommenter · 2019-05-20T02:21:32+00:00

Because the sad truth is men want to be genuinely liked and valued, rather than being used for immigration and financial purposes.

That said, the mail-order bride may potentially be cheaper.

why is there such a stigma against it?

Western women don't like competition. Same reason they hate male bisexuality, sexbots and prostitution.

It also marks out a man as a failure within his own sex/relationship marketplace. Which is why many men contribute to the stigma as well.

abaxeron · 2019-05-20T07:24:46+00:00

Back in times when I talked to people whose fields of interest slightly intersected with dating agencies, they said that unestimated, but ENORMOUSLY non-trivial percentage of those "dating agencies" are thinly-veiled prostitution / sugaring / web striptease services and/or scams.... Well, except those people I talked to usually were either co-founders, tech engineers, or camgirls of those agencies, not scammed clients.

The data OP brought up only accounts for marriages that actually happened (even super-generously assuming that it's reliable).

dicklord_airplane · 2019-05-20T11:18:22+00:00

Im sorry to break the fantasy, but this is a scam people use to get citizenship in 1st world countries. Why would those women stay any longer than it takes for them to get a green card? Also, why would you trust any of the figures these 3rd world pimps distribute?

NicholasLeo · 2019-05-21T20:43:19+00:00

The divorce rate amonst non mail order marriages is not as high as you claim. See https://www.nytimes.com/2014/12/02/upshot/the-divorce-surge-is-over-but-the-myth-lives-on.html?_r=1&abt=0002&abg=1

Title	Why can't mail order brides be a solution to men with low SMV?
Author	Aishita
Upvotes	8
Comments	139
Date	May 18, 2019 10:53 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/bq9xpt/why_cant_mail_order_brides_be_a_solution_to_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-cant-mail-order-brides-be-a-solution-to-men.255703 https://theredarchive.com/post/255703

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