Just fucking go out.

profoak0117 · 2021-06-09T06:08:44+00:00

There are two nerds sticking out like sore thumbs

Live life, even if it might be disappointing

Sounds like those two guys were living their lives hanging out and discussing Star Wars with each other.

AsterMagentum · 2021-06-09T09:10:29+00:00

This reads like satire making fun of this subreddit

Nilbogpolka · 2021-06-09T05:52:36+00:00

There are two nerds sticking out like sore thumbs, engaged in a heated discussion about the ethics of the Rebel Alliance going on suicide missions in Star Wars. “At least I’m not one of those guys,” I said to myself.

There is no need to dunk on people you don’t know like that. Besides, I don’t see anything wrong with this. It sounds like those two dudes are just unapologetically being themselves. You make some good points, but I think you should re-read that sentence as it says a lot about how you judge people on first impression.

VogueCody25 · 2021-06-09T10:57:53+00:00

Shake my fuckin' head man, good advice, but you sound like a judgemental dick. "At least I'm not those guys!" you cheerfully say as you just finished up a fucking yoga lesson. See how it feels? To be completely summed up by a small aspect of your character? A fucking hobby of yours?

And not to mention you don't even talk to any women in this story! You just got a potential wingman that might help you one day. Yes, you should just go out. Don't do it to be better than other guys, or the dudes talking about Star Wars, do it to be better than OP, but not too much because being better than him is a low goal. Cheers!

chocolatecomedyfan · 2021-06-09T11:58:39+00:00

Solid advice but jeez you're not the live and let live kinda guy are you?

latinaut · 2021-06-09T13:03:34+00:00

As someone who's Autistic, people like us often experience hesitancy to "go out". I appreciate this morale booster. It's something I struggle to remind myself. Thanks.

Also - as a Star Wars fan, ain't nothing wrong with talking about lore!! Plenty of chicks into nerdy shit lol, you'd be surprised

wagsyman · 2021-06-09T11:03:36+00:00

"at least I'm not one of those guys" what a shitty attitude to have, don't put others down just because they like a hugely popular movie series lmao.

Got some work to do on your "inner game" there bud

SerratedDerk · 2021-06-09T10:26:05+00:00

Don't talk shit about star wars man

alexminne · 2021-06-09T15:09:05+00:00

You really didn’t need an entire paragraph trashing on the Star Wars guys. That’s low OP. At least they are there together as friends, having a good time and not drinking alone in a track suit. This post definitely doesn’t deserve the upvotes or awards.

Daunt02 · 2021-06-09T14:32:46+00:00

I've picked up a woman, and we're still friends, by getting into a super heated conversation about the enlightened ethics of Star Trek. Don't judge, those guys probably pull.

Reddithian · 2021-06-09T16:03:42+00:00

I'm one of those guys who talks about Star Wars in public. Ironically, I read your judgemental post and thought to myself "at least I'm not that guy."

If you want to meet people and make genuine connections, you're gonna have to leave your prejudices at home or you're gonna have a bad time. Accept people for who they are and let people love what they love.

Your mantra of "just fucking go out" is spot on, but I would also add "and don't be a dick to people while you're there."

Iam_nameless · 2021-06-09T14:19:43+00:00

Making fun of Star Wars fans is a beta move

immatonton · 2021-06-09T15:02:57+00:00

I love that I’m not a bar guy. I meet girls at the gyms I go to, stores, in public, or the many other outdoor activities I like to do.

Though, the point of “just fucking go out” is spot-on. It doesn’t matte so much what you do, just that it’s a meaningful, enjoyable experience for you, and many others, because, yes, a side part of hobbies is meeting cool, like-minded people.

Also, just fucking make eye contact with people, not just women, but especially women. Just fucking talk to people, not just women, but especially women. Just fucking approach too.

Build frame, get game, and steal those hearts.

OKKira · 2021-06-09T17:28:17+00:00

This is good advice. By the way, this is what single girls do. We go out to bars/clubs. And the goal is to have fun, but in the back of everyone's minds is: oh maybe I'll meet someone who I'd be into while I'm out.

If you're a functional, healthy guy and you're not putting yourself out there, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

obviouslybait · 2021-06-09T19:18:52+00:00

Would be fucking nice If we weren't still in LOCKDOWN (ontario)

Alive-Doughnut2345 · 2021-06-09T05:13:09+00:00

I agree with this. Nothing will happen if you do not put yourself out there. A month ago I was minding my own business on a bench by the ocean, there was a guy on the bench across from me in heated discussion on his phone. I overheard most of the conversation and asked him if he was in film or something. He said he was a musician and proceeded to tell me his life story and serenade me with some of the best fiddle playing I ever heard

So yeah. You never know who you’ll encounter.... even if they are crazy talented and make you feel inferior for not being as accomplished as them 😂

ScreamingButtholes · 2021-06-09T16:17:32+00:00

Damn what did the ‘nerds’ do to you?

MrDankky · 2021-06-09T16:33:22+00:00

Good job man. Next step, don’t put other people down for different interests like the Star Wars nerds

Dazzling-Importance1 · 2021-06-09T10:57:22+00:00

Girls have the passive role in dating so they just need to go out. Guys have to learn how to approach

TheSunshineMan · 2021-06-09T16:33:07+00:00

You make fun of them for being Star Wars fans and they'd probably make fun of you for doing "girly" yoga.

bls65 · 2021-06-09T16:40:05+00:00

Well said and well done! That is the secret, "JUST FUCKING GO OUT". Nothing will happen sitting at home on the computer.

The only thing I might suggest is dropping the text conversations, people sitting in bars glued to their phones do not look approachable. I usually place my phone FACE DOWN on the bar and don't touch it so that I stay in the moment.

loofyd · 2021-06-09T16:47:00+00:00

Thanks much

Boomslangalang · 2021-06-09T16:54:35+00:00

You are a terrific writer. Good luck on your journey, somehow I have faith you have soaked up the right lessons.

Evry1cansuckit · 2021-06-09T17:23:24+00:00

Don't you know being a nerd is fucking cool?

Gardenlady26 · 2021-06-09T17:26:49+00:00

I have to admit you “did what I want to do often”! On the weekends I pass the local pub with “live music still playing and I love I I! I can actually sit alone! Just have not walked in.... again... I’ve done it twice now it’s been a moment. Easier I think for a guy? Am I wrong?

arjsng · 2021-06-09T17:40:14+00:00

facts

Saxon2010 · 2021-06-09T18:56:58+00:00

Love this. Sometimes I also just say “fuck it” and go out alone. I’ll have a couple drinks and play a game of pool and try to spark conversation with anyone. Worst case scenario is you don’t make any connections and you just had some drinks.

COMBATPROSSI · 2021-06-09T19:39:12+00:00

Amen, the last girl I asked out has turned out to be one of the most amazing women I’ve ever been with. If I just hung out on the apps and didn’t find the courage to just talk to women like a 20th century man, I never would have met her. Just go out!

2021-06-09T23:56:09+00:00

Yoga was the most impressive thing you said. Yoga will take you further than the other experience you had. Trust!

BlackShabbos · 2021-07-01T04:48:44+00:00

[permanently deleted]

xenonmail · 2021-06-10T03:00:19+00:00

222 angry Reddit nerds show up to OPs door with light sabers at the ready.

LilQuackerz · 2021-06-09T21:16:16+00:00

You write like a preteen fan fiction writer especially your mindset in the way that you judge people is especially immature.

Global-Bridge-6787 · 2021-06-09T05:01:34+00:00

Thanks man. I’m in sunny Sacramento and it’s hot as hell. I’ve been forcing myself to go outside and this just gave me even more inspiration!

Upbeat_Bathroom_296 · 2021-06-09T11:43:58+00:00

Thanks mate, you gave me a boost to go out leave my comfort zone now.

Stonkatron69 · 2021-06-09T14:31:08+00:00

I appreciate the uncommon verbiage throughout this post. You could write a fucking novel bud.

RichardSamsonJordan · 2021-06-09T16:39:45+00:00

HA! You think you are better than those Star Wars nerds? I love it when people act high and mighty but you seem more pathetic then them. Loser.

trailfinder4 · 2021-06-09T18:22:14+00:00

I think that the general message of the post is being derailed about the nerd discussion, the general message of just go out who the fuck knows what will happen is great however condescending he was about the nerds. But yeah man the nerd thing shows your inner state, you want to be in a good mindset and if you're going around judging people then you're doing it wrong. You should just look at everything as potential which you are generally doing, just understand that there's things you don't know. Discussing the ethics of the rebel alliance has benefit to it even. The rebel alliance is an archetype which can be expanded into many areas of philosophy and life, there's beauty to everything man. Happiness and your perception of it is a choice or however you would want to define it: mindset etc.

liamo6w · 2021-06-09T23:52:46+00:00

“Just go out”. Proceeds to shit on two guys having a good time and going out. You seem like a likable guy.

BlackShabbos · 2021-06-10T06:26:37+00:00

I was pleasantly surprised to find how this post blew up. As much fun as it would be to respond to each one, I'll settle for an over-arching statement on the alleged point of contention: the Star Wars Nerds (they're a proper duo now).

First, I encourage you to analyze the context of the post. I'm a guy looking to build social skills. I was a lifelong homebody. I awkwardly navigated through my day, balancing dangerously on the razor's edge of social embarrassment. I do not present myself as a chad, because I am not one.

If anything, I'm closer to being a "nerd". I have deep knowledge of music and movies which I enjoy. I've invested thousands upon thousands of dollars in hobbies which yield no tangible return. I can wax rhapsodic about things which people don't understand, or care to-- even in my circles.

So, why the anecdote about the Star Wars Nerds?

Enter: emotional regulation and social intelligence.

Allow me to illustrate the scene for you: it's 7:30 in the evening. This is the bar's grand re-opening after being closed for a year. There are four or five tables with seating outside. There are couples, groups of friends, best mates, etc. They all converse quietly within their circles. There is no music playing, nor street noise. It's nigh paradisaical.

Then, one conversation rises above the droning serenity. It is not mirthful, or bearing the patience of concentrated debate. The vocal inflections suggest agitation. It's only a few degrees of severity short of fisticuffs.

Those, gentlemen, are the Star Wars Nerds. They're getting really fucking heated about a niche philosophical inquiry about a soft science fiction franchise. They're emotionally unregulated. They're socially oblivious. It's awkward.

And, all of you know that Star Wars has some particularly insufferable devotees. C'mon, now.

So, did I use the Star Wars Nerds as a contrast to my emotional regulation and social intelligence in that context? Absolutely. For whatever inexperience I may have, I can at least be confident that I would be able to engage in civil discussion in public with whatever company I was sharing. That is a cornerstone of my personality, and an important one to have. After all, people notice how you interact with others. You don't want to give a bad impression to the staff at the bar, neighboring customers, the cute girl you've had your eye on, etc, when you're not even directly engaging with them, right?

Could I have described the anecdote with more nuance? Yes. But, they were just a footnote in the story. I have no vendetta against them. I don't scorn their hobbies, let alone their existence. If I went into too much detail then it would seem like I was obsessed with them. It would have distracted (even more?) from the overall message.

Some people say that I'm encouraging people to leave their comfort zone, but then berating people who might be doing so. I offer two counters to that assertion: first, you assume that the Star Wars Nerds have been living under a rock this entire time (stereotype, much?). They were, in fact, sitting with two women. Their behavior demonstrated that they were quite comfortable in public. For all we know, they could be top chads. I merely observed their behavior in the moment and assured myself that, as awkward as I might be in public, I could demonstrate worse behavior. At least, any negative impressions I might leave would be in the context of a one-on-one conversation. I wasn't going to send out a blast wave of bad vibes (I save that for Reddit, it seems?).

Second, I didn't approach the guys and tell them to relax. I didn't say anything about them to anyone at the bar. Like I said earlier: I have no vendetta against them. If they were exhibiting more approachable behavior, then I might have even entered the conversation if I was more socially experienced. I do quite enjoy listening to people talk about their hobbies. I am also a lifelong Star Wars fan, albeit a mellow one.

So, there you have it. I appreciate that people find this worthy to discuss, even if they think poorly of me. If you felt personally attacked because you are a Star Wars fan, or self-identify as a "nerd", I encourage you to reassess my story with this explanation. It was not targeting you, and only "targeted" the Star Wars Nerds in that particular instant.

Be well, and just fucking go out.

Astrotheurgy · 2021-06-09T13:57:01+00:00

I love the way you write. Very creative and eloquent.

ThenIJizzedInMyPants · 2021-06-09T16:48:37+00:00

Great message in this post, but all anyone is focused on is the two nerds talking about star wars smh

2021-06-09T15:10:23+00:00

Yep. Do you enjoy playing RPGs? Just pretend this body is your character. Go have fun & take risks. You’re human just like everyone else there, and no matter how someone seems on the surface they’re there to have some fun too! Take them on an adventure :)

JoeWim · 2021-06-09T15:13:36+00:00

This could have really just been a short post about how going out with a mindset of meeting people is valuable, rather than for the sole purpose of meeting women.

ImJustSo · 2021-06-09T15:34:06+00:00

Good job, but stop comparing yourself to anyone, but who you were yesterday.

Somelier1234 · 2021-06-09T15:46:37+00:00

This is great dude, one of the best pieces of advice when I was having a rough time in life and thought most people were inherently bad was just saying hi and complimenting people it really opens your eyes to know that one, everyone loves compliments and two most people really are nice and do want to talk but are just shy to start the conversation makes life a lot funner

lordsudbury · 2021-06-09T21:42:14+00:00

I thought you were a guy at first. Then I thought you were a girl. And after skimming the whole article I still can't go if you're a guy or girl

L-K-G · 2021-06-10T09:09:02+00:00

Unironically though.

maxwilliams11 · 2021-06-11T08:15:11+00:00

This is either a joke or a delusional fantasy

Title	Just fucking go out.
Author	BlackShabbos
Upvotes	586
Comments	89
Date	June 9, 2021 4:45 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/nvnggy/just_fucking_go_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/just-fucking-go-out.1282913 https://theredarchive.com/post/1282913

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