Does sex really ever 'just happen'?

dropmeoffhere · 2022-02-10T00:52:01+00:00

The more women you ask the better chance you have.

SlyderKmK · 2022-02-10T00:38:59+00:00

Oh I just think if you meet someone at a bar, and they go home with you, then it's hard to say "it just happened"....think both parties would know what's up if that happened. Same thing at a party...if you go into a bedroom....good chance you're going to hookup.

DontTakePeopleSrsly · 2022-02-10T01:31:58+00:00

“One thing led to another” is always preceded by something to absolve the woman of any responsibility in sex happening.

We just met at a bar. I was drunk, he was cute & one thing led to another.

We just went to his apartment because he needed to take his dog out, and then one thing led to another.

All you have to do is give the woman something to take the blame for her.

dropmeoffhere · 2022-02-10T00:52:36+00:00

The more women you ask the better chance you have. Iv heard similar stories as well that are hard not to believe.

AloofusMaximus · 2022-02-10T01:52:54+00:00

It doesn't "just happen" for you, probably because you're not actually pushing for it. It's really just a matter of isolation and escalation.

I've heard people say they've fucked in clubs, or bathrooms in bars, but I've heard a lot of people's bullshit over the years too.

If you're wanting to fuck her, invite her back to your place. Women aren't stupid, they know that coming home with you after the bar means there's a good chance of having sex. If she's not open to the idea she's going to say no.

Is it just something girls tell themselves to abdicate the social stigma of having sex?

It's more about getting swept up in the moment. Though obviously you don't want to make her feel like a slut/regret sleeping with you.

RomanH101 · 2022-02-10T01:00:33+00:00

Game comes with experience. If you haven’t dealt with A LOT of women, it always feels calculative. And it makes sense to be so, women’s mating strategy from an evolutionary is to DISQUALIFY. They’re constantly bombarded with suitors, so women aren’t looking for things they like, rather they’re looking for things they DON’T like and whoever’s left standing gets given a chance.

The point is eventually you’ll become comfortable with the whole process of what makes women tick & it won’t feel as calculative.

surferguy999 · 2022-02-10T01:04:51+00:00

It does, but usually requires some prep work. It could be texting that girl you matched with, flirting with the girl at the bar when your both loose.

After a certain point things just start rolling and usually lead to sex (unless something comes up).

It’s even easier when it’s someone you’ve slept with before. You ask them to “grab a drink”, or “come over” which are both virtually guaranteed to end up in sex (specially if it’s just the two of you).

Joker_RH · 2022-02-10T01:20:30+00:00

Ahh it's a mix of both setting and progression. It's kinda difficult if you approach it from a logical standpoint but yeah you're gonna have to initiate the "right" actions that lead to it. Definitely you can feel it when it's gonna happen 😜 and the rest is rather easy. Also it might not be that very night but then if they invite you back then just keep going for it. When they're truly interested it kinda doesn't matter how you make the move.

mafiosomonkey · 2022-02-10T07:00:10+00:00

Build report, tease, escalate with some touching , a gentle push away ,Lots of eye contact. While maintaining eye contact … pause just look at her look in one eye, then the other then her mouth , the triangle , picture in your mind what she looks like naked , smile. Then look into her eyes… wait until it’s uncomfortable, then say come with me. Hold her hand and go somewhere quiet ,make out. Slowly. If you can’t get laid from that point you may be a lost cause

ikeepon · 2022-02-10T00:53:08+00:00

Sex doesn’t just happen but one-night-stands do. How easily it happens depends. Doesn’t have to be all about attraction, can just be about how horny the woman is because, let’s face it, any decently looking woman can find a willing partner.

thelambofdeth · 2022-02-10T00:52:31+00:00

Sure, if you're just really good-looking.

Minute-Lie-2287 · 2022-02-10T03:58:05+00:00

Yes it does. This is why you'll hear many stories about when somebody went out for the hell of it, did not give a fuck about gaming and hey, sex.

Lowest effort example I can remember fairly clearly;

I was in a bar talking to a female friend. Some girl she knew from idk when comes over and talks to her a minute or so couldn't hear about what. Then says is this your friend? ( me). Typical introduction then we just kind of stand there drinking and watching the band. Girl turns to me and says " I'd fuck your brains out, those glasses are just killing me" Asks me to take them off. Says " ok, either way I'd fuck your brains out but I love the glasses" I tell her I live right up the street. We go, done.

That girl I really could not handle...everytime I saw her we did nothing else, it would be five times that night. Once in the morning, once again after that.....and every time she mainly just wanted pounded, pounded , pounded the whole time. Wore me clean the hell out and was not that fun.

10 body, 4 face for this girl.

Crazy as hell too.... Randomly messages me one day out of nowhere about how much I hurt her by breaking up with her.....we never got together and I never gave one indication of rejecting her, just says this out of the blue.

incognito3107 · 2022-02-10T06:20:56+00:00

Some people are so natural with their attractive presence, positive emotions and sexual mindset that it just happens for them. Most people are not calibrated for sex machines by nature though :) But you may also get there if you wish to change.

I feel most men have relationships, because somehow the girl liked them, and she really wanted a boyfriend/husband at that moment.

Distraughtsugardaddy · 2022-02-10T06:21:53+00:00

I’m with you OP, this never happens to me. I do recall ONE time about 10 years ago I was out downtown and we met these girls and they came back to our place. Then I had one of them in my bedroom and awkwardly tried to kiss her and we did kiss but then it was awkward and ppl were right next to us so we left the bedroom and that was it.

But I guess if you get into those situation very often maybe it might start happening more often?

Definitely need to be very social, go out a lot, meet new ppl, dress well, get drunk, host parties etc etc and it will start happening more.

Logistics is half the battle

stanthemilkman88 · 2022-02-10T01:32:35+00:00

Sometimes. Happen for me on new years. Was great.

Chinksta · 2022-02-10T02:14:13+00:00

That's one of modern dating's crux is people get attached to "If I do this then he/she will do this" mentality. Things like this and relationships should happen naturally.

Calamity__Bane · 2022-02-10T04:08:16+00:00

One time at a party, I started dancing with a chick, we started making out, I put my hand down her pants, and then we ran off to an empty bedroom, got each other naked and started fucking. This entire process occurred without either of us saying a word.

MarcellusxWallace · 2022-02-10T04:23:42+00:00

I met a girl from a dating app at a restaurant and We ended up having sex that night on top of my car right in front of the restaurant after it closed. Met up a week later and spent the night at her house and had sex that night and the next morning. Then she ghosted me.

Another time in Europe I went to a thermal bath rave and had random sex with a random Australian girl. We saw each other, started making out without saying a word, then had sex in a locker room.

Another time I was at a really shitty dive bar and started talking to a middle aged Karen looking white lady with a huge, much younger black husband. Both swingers. She took me back to her house to a play party, and I had sex with four women I had never met before and never seen since.

Sometimes it does just happen for me, out of pure luck I guess. Then there’s other times where I go more than a year without sex :(

MeWuzBornIn1990 · 2022-02-10T14:27:13+00:00

Yea, that does happen and it has throughout all of human history.

ahab1313 · 2022-02-10T15:33:19+00:00

Absolutely! Just not with you involved.

LilBleeder · 2022-02-10T21:24:51+00:00

It happens all the time. It’s happening right now, somewhere

Pr1nceCharming_ · 2022-02-10T03:52:37+00:00

Yeah, if you’re a woman. If you’re a man, nothing ever happens unless you make it happen. The dudes with “game” make it seem like things just happen naturally. Sex should always be the guys fault, at least in the beginning.

Key-Quantity-9140 · 2022-02-10T02:18:55+00:00

Only for hot people

fuckboychadlmao · 2022-02-10T01:13:06+00:00

The first time I had sex with your mom, it did kind of “just happen”, now that I think about it.

Extra-Boysenberry · 2022-02-10T00:53:05+00:00

It depends man. I’ve had girls match with me on Tinder, ask what I’m doing tonight, I insist they come over, and we’re smashing all within an hour of matching. Doesn’t happen very often, but I sometimes appreciate the low effort hookups.

BrettyanneXoX · 2022-02-10T02:22:45+00:00

Got rawdogged as a babysitter by a dad in the car

AccomplishedReason18 · 2022-02-10T01:00:49+00:00

Yes it does

mightymite88 · 2022-02-10T01:17:47+00:00

Yep. I've had a lot of shocking (but good ) situations arise over the years.

unfinity2 · 2022-02-10T02:30:13+00:00

A-constant-beat · 2022-02-10T03:24:15+00:00

One time I was sleeping and then woke up to a women sucking on my cock. It was my birthday party and she wanted to give me a gift! Unfortunately, she sucked 3 guys off that night before mine and she was on coke but I had no idea.

Lord_Augastus · 2022-02-10T05:45:32+00:00

Yeah..... absolutely sometimes you just meet and mash and its easy and it flows. If its hard and you feel like you are gridning nails to get a number, you clearly arent mashing....

aCatsFat · 2022-02-10T05:51:09+00:00

For sure, clubbing is the easiest to do this. It's a numbers game

Lon4reddit · 2022-02-10T11:11:14+00:00

Sex just happens sometimes yep. Not that much, but it does

mangkok4 · 2022-02-10T13:38:55+00:00

Yes. I once ran into an old friend on accident. I happened to be staring into her eyes at a bar, and she asked me why my dick was out.

I tripped on my way out, and found myself balls deep in her friend, who I just met.

brainenfuego · 2022-02-10T17:19:10+00:00

Here’s a little story… it’s going to be a bit drawn out because there are a few relevant points to hit. In high school, I was a tall, skinny white boy with mullet Afro. For context, even my high school basketball coach called me Qtip. I was quite good at basketball. I went to a SMALL school in our SMALL town. Like there were 34 kids that graduated in my class….small. Our town is situated right next to a Native reservation and so we had a lot of native Americans who went to our school because the school on the res wasn’t awesome. I had a lot of good friends who were native, and they were all related in some way or another. We had a freaking gorgeous chick who was native who went to school, was part of the “popular” clique, and was a STUD at basketball. We talked occasionally but she was a year older, and I wasn’t a part of the popular groups, but since she was a cousin of a good friend, we definitely knew each other (kinda hard to miss anyone in a school that small).

One day in PE, we were all just messing around shooting hoops and Angela (not her real name) said she wanted to play 1 on 1. I obliged. We went round and round, she was really good, but she’s also 5’8” and I’m 6’2”. I didn’t let her beat me, but I almost didn’t win. She was very physical, bumping me, hand checking, she grabbed my dick one on “accident”, I kept backing her down and bumping her tits, brushed across her puss a few times, we were definitely pushing the boundaries just because we were both getting pretty horny playing against each other. This is critical to the story…

Nothing came of it. We were in high school. Fast forward 5 years. I had gained weight, cut my hair, grew a goatee, put on some muscle, and learned a good bit of game. It’s summer time and me and my guys would go hang at the bars and clubs in the city about 40 miles from my hometown. Well, guess who I run into with a few of her friends from our school? Yep…Angela. She says, damn, you look different! With a gleam in her eye. We sat there the whole night talking and dancing and at the end of the night, we exchanged numbers. I didn’t call her that week because I was so busy. Cut to the very next weekend. It was the rodeo and town fair in my hometown. I went back to my old town to hang with some friends and party in the only bar in town. Guess who’s there watching her cousin (my friend) perform with his band? Yep…Angela. We had a few drinks, picked up where we left off, and 30 minutes later I’ve got her our back of the bar, bent over the hitching post, raw digging the ever loving shit out of her spectacular pussy. It was everything I’d ever wanked to in my dreams as a teenager.

So…yes. It does just happen sometimes…sometimes it takes some flirting and playing the LOOOOONG game. But it does happen.

Moikepdx · 2022-02-10T18:42:23+00:00

There is a bit of abdication of responsibility in the use of “it just happened”, but for a reason. It acknowledges sex happened and was consensual while trying to avoid the “slut shaming” problem that accompanies an admission that she actively wanted sex. And sex is a natural thing, so it’s reasonable to say it “just happened”.

With that said, sex generally won’t happen without someone taking the lead. In the case of your Italian girl hookup she likely took the lead. Either she culturally didn’t fear appearing slutty or she knew it was OK in the particular context (either she was alone and she needn’t tell anyone or with others who won’t shame her and won’t tell others, plus people she knows won’t randomly meet you, so she doesn’t care what you say or to whom).

Actually, this is one of the major reasons why girls are more likely to have a fling while they are on vacation (or while they are at home but with someone who is traveling.)

Czekraft · 2022-02-10T20:56:36+00:00

In porn, but that's hardly realistic. The chances that people 'just happen' to have sex with strangers is so slim that it skews peoples perceptions of it actually happening when they read about it here. Many posts are just polar opposites of people who are either in desperate need of help or are so happy they are they want the world to know of their random one night stands.

2022-02-12T01:40:55+00:00

Well sure bro some girls are just horny. If you stood in the street and asked every girl who walks past if they want to fuck eventually somebody will say yes most likely. Not that that's tasteful lol

recyclablebanthas · 2022-03-03T00:00:06+00:00

1

I'll hear people casually mention 'so I met them at a party, one thing led to another and half an hour later I was raw dogging her in an alleyway'.

Something like this could happen although The more likely scenario is that it generally takes more than half an hour. One night stands are a thing though, and you likely know this.

2

Maybe not always that intense, but it seems like sex is something that should naturally proceed attraction between two people - for many people it does, but it never just happens for me.

It's wildly oversimplifying to say that it just naturally happens. It actually takes a bit of work on oneself to learn how to get out of one's own way so that things can "naturally" happen.

3

It always feels like I'm having to consciously think and strategise, calibrate where to touch her and what bullshit to whisper into her ear.

If one has had spotty results or hasn't really had much success at all, it's going to feel this way. That is common. It's going to feel as if the process is some kind of maze where one wrong move can screw things up.

In reality, it's generally going to take some amount of self-awareness to navigate these kinds of social interactions successfully.

Because we all have our demons and shortfalls and have to wrestle with them at least occasionally while dealing with others.

4

Is it just something girls tell themselves to abdicate the social stigma of having sex?

When we get right down to it, it is pretty common for people to enjoy a process that feels more natural as opposed to forced. That's true whether we're talking about men or women.

5

Or does it all feel more natural as you improve your game?

It does feel more natural as one scheme improves. Because you learn to let go of outcome dependence and just playfully see what happens.

Meanwhile other people will be freaking out and obsessing over details which lowers their chances and destroys their enjoyment of the process.

Title	Does sex really ever 'just happen'?
Author	faithinstrangers92
Upvotes	59
Comments	111
Date	February 10, 2022 12:36 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/sosnk2/does_sex_really_ever_just_happen/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-sex-really-ever-just-happen.1267129 https://theredarchive.com/post/1267129

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