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[–]daughniel 64 points65 points66 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
I find art shows to be a pretty good place to come in contact with women. There is something about the atmosphere that often brings about intelligent women
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]daughniel 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Knowing a thing or two about the art, and having your own interpretation of it = brownie points; and can often be attractive to those sapiosexuals I imagine
[–]Edwin_Tzar 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
How do I learn to interpret art and art in general ?
[–]daughniel 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Everything is a metaphor.. Or think about what the art piece means to you. How it makes you feel
[–]daughniel 10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
(: yeah forreals. Glad I can help in someway.
[–]Orphenia__ 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
By art do you mean going a museum or gallery?
[–]daughniel 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I was thinking more so art galleries , but museums might work too
[–]avyayy 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
People who love monalisa are sure have very high intelligence
[–]eternally__curious 169 points170 points171 points 5 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link
>I don't know how body would impact this but I'd assume not a huge amount among reader crowds.
Body does have a huge impact on this . I can speak from experience as I my status is very similar to yours brown , loves to read , in a book club ,etc (although I will never in a 1000 years call myself intelligent ,lol ) and I saw that my success (women responding positively to me approaching them ) increased by a huge margin when I lost weight and gained some muscle.
Sure just having a sexy body won't make you instantly attractive to all smart/cerebral women but its a big bonus to your personality. You have a big advantage over a fat guy with the same personality and interests as you . Similarly you probably won't approach a woman you are not physically attracted and just because she was present in a library.
[–]dkdkfjkf 81 points82 points83 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
As a former tall and lanky guy, the difference in how people treat you when very unfit vs above avarage fitness is massive
[–]eternally__curious 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly brother .
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]eternally__curious 23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
Its disheartening to know how much our looks and body i.e. things that you don't associate as the "core" or "real" you play a part in this whole journey.
We want to liked/loved us because they saw and feel the "real" us but at many times it was because we were at the right place and the right time and had curly hair with a decent physique.
Its kind of depressing and uplifting at the same time as you know almost everyone (who puts in some effort ) has a chance of finding something special.
[–]MReaps 39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
As a fat guy (been fat since I was 12, am now 25), I can tell you it Is the real you. Taking care of your body is an actual value, it means you care about yourself, it also hints at you being able to exert self-control, being able to maintain healthy habits, probably know how to cook. Moreover, it also means you actually respect yourself, probably seek to better yourself etc. It IS NOT just your appearance, it's a reflection of your values and the way you see yourself in the end. Also, you don't have to be the super buff type, just not fat.
[–]eternally__curious 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I recently gained a good amount of "quarantine" weight and I can already see people (especially women I am attracted to ) treating me differently because of that . There hasn't been large changes in my values or the core or essential me but there have been changes in how I am viewed right now .
Maybe this comes from my personal (bad) experience or this might be a symptom of a larger personal issue but I really want to be "seen" in a romantic relationship.
[–]L0ckt1ght 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I lost a lot of weight, and gained a lot back. What I noticed is when I gained weight even though I was confident, that weight was on my mind. My clothes not fitting correctly, then because of that I start to subconsciously pick at myself (smoothing my shirt too often, going from relaxed to tense in certain situations, etc.) It might not affect your core person but it does effect the vibe you give off.
[–]eternally__curious 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Definitely . I noticed this in myself too . I know I am an alright or attractive person but my perception of what others think of me due to my weight gain or current status makes me anxious and probably gives of insecure vibes.
[–]L1ttl3Lun4 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
👏👏👏 louder for those in the back!
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The "real" you is what you decide to be. If you decide you're ugly (too fat, wrong hair, stupid, etc.) that's what you'll be. If you decide you're handsome (well dressed, muscular, clean etc.) that's also what you'll be. Try to make the "real" you someone you want to be, someone you like. It's a choice.
[–]eternally__curious 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
The attributes you speak of although are part of me, they are a superficial part of "real" me. According to me the core self would consist of things like my guiding principles in life in general , my kindness , my capacity of giving into anger, the ability to feel joy in seemingly "normal" situations ,etc
I can change these attributes to a certain degree as you said : be someone I want to be and I want to be "seen" by my partner in these areas . Not just because of the superficial attributes .
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Superficial isn't superficial if it screws up your life.
[–]eternally__curious 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ain't that the truth .
My perception of them or how important they are has screwed up my life to a good degree.
[–]kuavi 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Is it really not part of who you are though? With very few exceptions, most people's satisfaction for their partner drastically increases with their fitness level as well as literally everybody benefitting from being more in shape. If you cant do something that helps both yourself and your partner drastically that in all reality doesnt require much beyond discipline and a bit of time, I would be concerned that that person lacks the discipline to better themselves in other ways.
[–]L1ttl3Lun4 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Underrated comment
[–]FranangerForce 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
to be honest if you packed on more muscle, you would probably feel more confident, and girls love confidence
[–]eternally__curious 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's there too . It is important that I believe that I am attractive which automatically happens if I increase my muscle mass and decrease body fat %.
[–]MrDankky 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Are you sure that’s not the added confidence a better body gave you? Either way hitting the gym is good for you
[–]Teamtoast 45 points46 points47 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
So basically, if you have a hobby - go to the place to do hobby with others, find girl who is also doing the hobby and talk about hobby whilst exchanging contact info.
Yea of course
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This. OPs advice is only good for avid readers who genuinely want to join book clubs. For other people, this would be a very inauthentic approach.
[–]loofyd 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh shit
This is social circle !
[–]Complex_Parking_6644 85 points86 points87 points 5 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
Speaking as a girl who’s always in bookstores, this would 100% work on me as long as the guy is nice about it
[–]wewenttoseethestars 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
100% was always my dream to be approached by bookish guys in bookstores. As long as they are respectful, don’t harass me or insist when I say no of course. I don’t care for looks that much as long as you take care of yourself and of your mind!
[–]resetmysoulagain 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That was my first thought. Intelligence is sexy!
[–]Liebner-Anthony-S 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Of course, if a girl looks more than once at you what does that mean exactly?
[–]foursquad1 22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It means it's time you go and talk to her.
[–]loofyd 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
How do you know she's looking at you, esp more than once ?
I mean how does one monitor and verify this behavior of the girl towards them ?
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good question, I'd like to hear the answer too.
[–]thekindheartdpervert 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Just go ask her yourself
[–]loofyd 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What would you ask if you noticed a girl glancing at you ?
[–]thekindheartdpervert 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
"Hey, I saw you trying to figure out the name of the book I had in hand. It's xyz book by zyx. What are you reading? "
Make sure you're reading an interesting book lol
Very smooth and very nice !
[–]Liebner-Anthony-S 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Brilliant! mental note created
Say hi and find out? :)
[–]Throwaway2829394938 17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As an avid reader myself of basically only Self-help/Self improvement & personal development books, I love this post, this is something I could see myself do and I'm awkward as fuck 😂
Great post
[–]sharpknivesahead 28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Can confirm that if someone did this to me while I was in a book store I would fall in love with you right there on the spot
[–]longlivekingjoffrey0 points 5 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
How about on Reddit? /s
[–]rezuler 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Unless?
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Are you indian.? Cause this sounds like an Indian thing to do.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Global-Bridge-6787 21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol badass dude; thanks for the tips from a brown brother.
[–]Bhavuk2002 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Hey i am the Indian that you’re looking for that’s def gonna try this tip next week
[–]Yoede15 points 5 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
This is good information. Thanks
[–]vaktaeru 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
TL;DR go to a public space that facilitates your interests if you want to meet people that share your interests, and seek out social activities that YOU enjoy, not the social activities that society tells you are the "right place" to meet people.
Every successful relationship I've had has been with someone who loves anime and dnd as much as I do. Do you think I met these women at bars? Of course not! I've been to bars with them, but I met them at anime conventions, university anime/gaming clubs, game stores, and libraries (manga section).
If your interests aren't heavily mainstream, you won't find what you're looking for in heavily mainstream places. Immerse yourself in social settings that make you happy and comfortable, and the women you meet there will see the side of you that your friends do - and as a result, they'll automatically like you much more.
And don't hesitate to make friends there as well. Guys that seem to exude charisma usually just happen to be friends with most of the people in the room already. It's much easier to be that guy when you're surrounded by people you would actually want to be friends with.
[–]notthrowaway027452 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Sucks when your interests aren’t very social or are heavily male-dominated then
[–]vaktaeru 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What are your interests?
[–]notthrowaway027452 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
When I could afford it, shooting. I also like playing electric guitar. Occasionally I’ll get to play some videogames. I work out a lot, which some people would count as an interest. I actually have a trial MMA class tonight so that might turn into an interest. Most days though I have 0 time to spend on any interests. It’s wake up, go to work, come home and workout, cook food, go to bed, repeat.
[–]singlecellfromearth -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Gym/grocery store
[–]notthrowaway027452 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I don’t disagree with you, but that’s the opposite of the point of the OP and comment I replied to
[–][deleted] 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The fuck is a book club
[–]Smoovemammajamma 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A bludgeon made from books
[–]mainag13 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thank you for this post. It is really helpful.
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Whoever is responding negatively / over/critical to this post and the strategies laid out, has some serious issues they need to address and talk to a therapist immediately. Don’t sweat the negative comments OP this was a good post
[–]cooooook123 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Insert my dumbass who has sunk more time into bass guitar than anything else. I'm not unread in the realm of music 🤷♂️ lol.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]cooooook123 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Guess we could swap places for a bit 😅 It's straight up awkward at times because people will be like "what kinda movies/books do you like" and I can only really name off one or two of each in the past 2 years 😂
Mostly will have the TV on, but the bass in my lap. I don't really pay close attention to what I'm watching anymore.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]cooooook123 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Monetizing is getting there (finally lol). For the first time ever I have several paying gigs lined up for this summer. One of the more serious guys in town scouted me and added me to his line-up. I appreciate your perspective :) Hopefully I have some luck at the venues. At the very least, it will be trial by fire for the social skills I want to work on.
[–]Spicymayo_0507 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link
This might sounds quite negative and maybe irrelevant but when I read ‘I am an intelligent man’, it often makes me hesitant in dating app (although you are not entirely talking about OLD) Being described as ‘intelligent’ should come from others not from themselves. Sometimes it indicates arrogance and self-conceit with shallow insights. But glad this approach worked out for you. Maybe you are a lot more attractive in person than dating profile is what made it more successful :)
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]daddyxanax 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn no arrogance or self conceit in that reply LOL
[–]AhBenTabarnak -2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
The thing is, with someone saying he's 6'4 in his bio, or the guy saying he bench 225, those are facts. Their are both measurable and quantifiable.
Intelligence is subjective. You could be super capable in school and other academic tasks and be an absolute chomp in social settings or have the artistic sense of a tree. Are you still less intelligent ? no. In the same way someone who suck in school, is not in anyway less intelligent. The I.Q test was made by humans, remember that. It has flaws.
That's why it's probably better to let others tell you about your intelligence and stay humble about it, because for some you may very well be intelligent, and for others, an absolute retard.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AhBenTabarnak -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It is actually subjective. The only argument you're promoting here is "based on tests". So based on these tests, and only theses tests, you're considered intelligent.
Now, people as you should probably know don't gives a rat's ass about those test and your IQ. Because when it comes to human relations, your ability to solve problems, recognize patterns, think outside of the box should not play a factor.
You're trying to promote your story like some template people have to follow, or tricks. There is no tricks, maybe if all you want to is get laid, sure. But ultimately, all you need to do, is do your own thing, and someone with the same interests/mind set will by default be doing something similar and your path will cross, enabling you to meet this person and so on.
Also, to be honest man, nobody gives a shit about how intelligent you are. I was like you when I was younger, being diagnosed with "surdouance" (in french, in english it's probably "gifted" or something ?), high IQ, etc and just acting like I was the shit, that I should find someone as bright as me, I shouldn't waste my time doing things that doesn't elevate me intellectually, etc. The only thing I was achieving was being a complete douche, and honestly you sure as hell sound like past me. That's why I hate those stupid tests, because ultimately all they do is inflate your ego and makes you even more of a narcissist.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
Einstein never said that
[–]WalidfromMorocco 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
If she doesn't know of any, say you're trying to expand your reading group of friends and ask for her number.
Guy asks a girl number just to be friends. They hang out as friends. Some time later, he asks her on a date because he actually likes her. Gets rejected because they are just friends. Surprised pikachu face.
[–]CurvyBadger 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah I dunno, as a girl I tend to prefer to make friends with someone before I date them - generally safer and gives me time to know I can trust them. I've been dating my current partner for 2 years but we were friends for like 8 months before that.
[–]MrDownhillRacer[🍰] 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
Eh, I like to show a little more intent than just asking for somebody's number under the pretense that I'm trying to start a book club or something.
Also, I'd be weary of immediately putting people into boxes like that. Just because she "likes to read" doesn't mean that the primary thing she's looking for in a guy is somebody whose read all the same books as her. That might just be a point of commonality to get a conversation started, but she might still be more interested in a guy who just makes her feel excited, regardless of what books he has or hasn't read.
Reading is great. But read because you enjoy reading, not because it'll help you pick up chicks or something.
[–]SwimNatural6 points 5 years ago [recovered] (8 children) | Copy Link
I actually agree with this. Showing more intent after getting a number “for the book club” is smart to do. We get it, we know why you ask for a number. We don’t mind...but let’s not pretend like you couldn’t get to a book club without my number :p
[–]loofyd 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
We get it, we know why you ask for a number
Are you sure about this ?
Does pretty much EVERY woman know this and is aware of the intent behind this ?
[–]SwimNatural4 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (6 children) | Copy Link
I can only speak for myself of course. My guess would be that extroverted women and those used to male attention will see through this, which doesn’t mean they mind.
In the same spirit, only women I can imagine not seeing the intent behind this would be very young and/or very shy/introverted.
[–]loofyd 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
My guess would be that extroverted women and those used to make attention will see through this, which doesn’t mean they mind.
Is there a risk that some women might cause a fuss/create a scene or humiliate someone ? I'm just scared that a lady might not like being asked for her number and might report me lol
That makes perfect sense, in all my anxiety, shyness, conservative social conditioning and fear of approaching a woman, i forget that ultimately they're people too, they're just human like any man.
Btw, if you don't mind, can i ask which country does your advice work best in ? (you can dm me if that's more appropriate)
Thanks for the input opens my eyes a little and takes away some of the approach anxiety !
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
My pleasure! I’m bored until my next meeting so ask away :p.
I’m in the Netherlands. It’s a relatively cold European culture. Meaning in the south of Europe where I am from its pretty normal men make constant approaches. Here it is actually not that normal. Most women would be weary of it. My hubby was just lucky. I think south/north divide generalizes to other continents too, with conservative religion being an obstacle.
And I think the best approach is the one where you are not dying of anxiety on the inside. So if you say you are shy and introverted, definitely do not approach people in a grocery store :). I’d go down the book club route from this post, I thought it was a pretty good idea.
You asked if there’s a risk a women might create a scene and humiliate you - yes. I think there’s always that risk. So you should only do this if you are semi-ok with a strong negative reaction as a possible consequence.
[–]FairAnalyst 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I can only speak for the US but as someone who has approached a lot. I've never had a woman give me shit for approaching her.
[–]loofyd 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I'm in Istanbul, do you know anyone who's been there ?
[–]FairAnalyst 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You may want to look into John Elite. He says he as students in india that have pulled chicks same day.
I cannot attest the quality of his game as I haven't bought it but as someone who has casually gone through his youtube, he does have real knowledge and experience. It may be a place to start.
[–]loofyd 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks !
[–]AnAngryYordle 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The point is not that it‘s gonna work 100% of the time. The point is that it‘s likely.
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
u/MrDownhillRacer : why are you booing me, am right!
[–]SwimNatural9 points 5 years ago [recovered] (10 children) | Copy Link
Just another anecdotal confirmation here :). I’m not single now, but when I was this would have definitely worked with me. Though only if the guy doesn’t stop talking right after getting my number, as that might leave me feeling played. I would always give a chance to smart guys who are at the same time confident enough to approach me and not intimidated to talk to me.
Muscular body...is a nice to have, I’m not going to lie. But I used to avoid men who are too fit as I associate it with other undesirable traits. But that’s just a shortcut that works often, but not always, so I kept my mind open for smart, confident + fit unicorns.
[–]hisgreatness64 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I will die on this hill. With women looks are a pass/fail thing. I've never seen a woman do the 1-10 scale.
So if you pass the looks department they then say what else do you got. Are you funny? are you talented in some way? Are you smart? Are you kind ? Etc.
Guys get stuck on looks and falsely assume women do too.
Being more than passing (which varies from woman to woman) doesn't increase your odds any.
[–]SwimNatural6 points 5 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
Spot on. Nobody hates a good looking person, but all guys need to be is one step above passable. And funnily enough, no matter your face or your height, a bit of weightlifting (but not too much) will push you over that passable edge for most (though not all) cases.
[–]hisgreatness64 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
If your average looking. Average face, average body and know women actually want connection and not diamonds and fast cars or Adonis bodies. You will do much better than any gym rat.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Agreed. What I meant with my gym comment is that it can help a bit if you are below average. As long as you don’t buff yourself such that it seems that’s the only thing going on in your life. But hey, there’s someone out there for the gym rats too. I guess just not the book club girls :)
[–]loofyd 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have got to go to / join more book clubs 😂
[–]FairAnalyst 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For guys that don't believe this, look up 'good looking loser'.
[–]loofyd 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, good on you and not to sound like I'm generalizing but the majority of the women will subconsciously and almost always opt for a physically fit guy and that's how it usually works
I would always give a chance to smart guys who are at the same time confident enough to approach me and not intimidated to talk to me.
This gives me some hope though, maybe i shouldn't be that scared to approach in places i consider awkward to approach (shops, grocery stores etc)
[–]SwimNatural5 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
It’s hard... if I was a guy I wouldn’t know how to approach someone in a grocery store. Maybe I’d be like “ehm, if you ever want some help with lifting those bags in future...we can try a date” 😂 I don’t know, don’t listen to me, I only know how to deal with men.
But my husband approached me in the middle of a street, while I was waiting for a bus. He said “sorry if I am going to sound like a maniac, I promise you I am not, but I’d love to have your number”. And that was that.
[–]loofyd 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Oh i have never approached anyone, i fear for my life when I think of approaching an absolute stranger lady (it's a long story you can read my post history if you're interested)
I don’t know, don’t listen to me, I only know how to deal with men.
Thanks, that's very honest. It goes to show you know what you're doing
A cold approach success story !
Look at this over here guys, cold approaches do have some spectacular happy endings !
Congratulations !
Have a great life with your husband
[–]adriann255 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
My issue is that I am not as avid a reader as I would like to be (work and language learning take up a good chunk of my time). I'd love to get back into reading, but most things I've read are either very well-known or very underground because of the language barrier.
I also love watching cult classics and listening to various types of music. So I guess I am sort of a jack of all trades.
What should i do about that ? Besides read more, which I cannot find the time to do.
[–]Edwin_Tzar 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Listen to audiobooks. good thing about them isvyou can listen to them while driving, doing chores, at the gym etc.
[–]adriann255 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I guess that's the only way for now. I never liked audiobooks because I was raised with the mentality of reading physical books, but it's still better than nothing. I just hope people won't see me as "fake". Thanks for the suggestion.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
great post bro, high iq boys rise!
[–]ShafinR12345 9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
The brown pain is real
[–]Ok-Information290713 points 5 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Eat more fiber.
[–]elf-_- 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Made me snarf
[–]ShafinR12345 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I should've worded it a bit better but, I'm not even mad
[–]chubby464 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think Asian men have it worse for the apps
[–]skawn 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I tried the reading thing. I devoured stacks of books. I read books of all genres. I went on fantastical adventures while also grounded myself in the biographies of champions of the past. I even did a stint as a page at a local library.
I got 0 dates. As such, I have since abandoned reading.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]WalidfromMorocco 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Try going to cafe shops that have a language exchange every weekend. You'll find plenty of girls there that you can strike a conversation with. Do you live in a big/medium city?
[–]WalidfromMorocco 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, you'll find plenty of foreign girls looking for romance in France.
[–]B0yW0nd3r 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nice job King!
I used to do this a lot in my 20s. It worked very well and I dated a lot of wonderful, smart women. I put on weight in my mid 30s but I'm still considered physically fit. And I can attest to what others are saying about how body shape works.
What works for me now, to go further on what you're saying about intelligent women, is literally making your profile into a Presentation.
[–]DiamondRider21 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes having muscle helps but what works better than having muscle is using tight long sleeve undershirts. Makes your forearms look defined and women tend to look at that area the most. So if you have veiny arms show it.
[–]Artrock80 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You met in a bookstore...Ask her if she’d like to come over for some Dickens. ;)
[–]Shakespeare-Bot 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Asketh that lady if 't be true she’d like to cometh ov'r f'r some dickens. ;)
I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.
Commands: !ShakespeareInsult, !fordo, !optout
!ShakespeareInsult
!fordo
!optout
This would be great advice if all the book stores didn't shit down in my city 😭 idk where to find intelligent guys now
[–]5kom5 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m with you on this one, this is excellent advice. I hate when men criticize the “lack” of high value women but they’re always trying to find them in the same places (bars, malls, etc.), if you want a high value partner go to places that preselects the type of people you want to socialize with.
[–]FaithInStrangers94 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ive actually reached a point where I’m unable to date girls who aren’t of a genuinely open minded, reasonably intelligent nature. I don’t know what to talk about with them. I guess it’s not exactly an awful dealbreaker though.
I really should consider going to places that would attract more ~intellectual~ women rather than hoping the girl I see at the mall/bar is refined
[–]plainbread11[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Question— how attractive are women at book stores? I’ve seen some that are alright sure but the vast majority of attractive girls these days are better found in a) the park, b) the gym, c) Instagram at home, d) the beach, e) bars and clubs— in that order.
[–]plainbread11[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean mate I’m an Indian dude too, glasses, reasonably fit but not ripped af, etc and I’ve successfully been with girls that at first glance look “out of my league”. The trick is to believe you can do it vs lowering your standards just so you can say you got a number.
[–]FairAnalyst -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
As someone that does sometimes go into bookstores, it would be the last place I'd try. Foot traffic is too low, and the odds of finding a cute girl are also pretty low. I'd never go to one unless it was extremely nearby where I already was and have extra time.
The best setting for a bookstore would be one attached to a trending / popular mall. If the mall has say, 10 hot girls walking through per hour, a bookstore would be at a 1 or less.
What is nice is the girls are already stopped and have time on their hands to chat. As someone who does walking girls as my mainstay, its nice to not feel rushed sometimes.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]FairAnalyst 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
What generalization?
That bookstores have slower foot traffic than malls? That's a completely true thing anyone can observe.
And usually a bookstore that has hot girls going through it usually has above average bookstore foot traffic, there will be people around.
I'm not exactly shitting on bookstores, some of my most memorable same day pulls were from bookstores. I'm stating that its not my first choice to game for those that have options.
Also, if you can game at a bookstore, you can game at target which typically has the same kind of customer and usually has 3x the attractive girl density.
[–]Risingtideresearch 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Least liked guys on dating apps huh?
[–]Jay_Bonk 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is such a romantization of reading and exactly what I expect from people of this type. Bloody everyone reads, it's not reserved for some limited intelligent group which has refined tastes. Finding a woman in a bookstore doesn't make her any more likely to be intelligent, especially in comparison to any other woman who reads books she buys from Mercado Libre or Amazon, or that reads papers in pdf format she finds online. Same thing for you, so a woman shouldn't assume oh this man is in one of the most common shop types in the world, he must be so very smart!
[–]Kyrkrim 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link
Avid readers are usually sapiosexual
This is complete bullshit
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (21 children) | Copy Link
[–]Kyrkrim -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link
Connecting someone's sexuality to interests they have is absurd
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (19 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link
Yeah you being a reader or smart or whatever has no impact on your SMV, women care about 1. Looks (passable) 2. Money (the more the merrier) 3. Status (again, the more the merrier)
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (17 children) | Copy Link
Look at my fucking post again and look at number 2
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
Ok but thats not necessarily just reading books like being a nerd is not attractive you are just projecting/ hamstering it in because you are insecure😄
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I said 2. Money you dimwit get off your high horse you need a smack in the fucking mouth, you’re probably poor 😄
[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
You come off as an egotistical twat, with nothing to be cocky about😄😄😄😄 you fucking read books clap clap for the handicap
[–][deleted] 5 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]mustafarian 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
can't believe the cucks on here are giving any type of hate.
He's giving a very specific example that applies to a specific type of person and shared his success story with it. I like it and it's way more refreshing then the typical posts these days that are just generic garbage about how one just needs to improve their confidence and put themselves out there and then you will find success!!
this is much more practical and appreciate the niche example OP gave
I'm not a fan of this style of approach. It feels very disingenuous. Rather than concocting this convaluted book club story, I'd rather just ask about the book she's reading or just straight up tell her she's seems cute and intelligent. Trying to indirectly slide in there through going to a club meeting just to get her specifically seems borderline creepy to me.
[–]dibbsa 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I disagree..the whole book club thing is a little out there. Pick up on the book they are reading and use that for a discussion.
You can pretend to read a Kindle.. Who knows how many books are on there. HAHA
[–]swcult 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This has to be one of the dumbest mf’ing subs on reddit
[–]Olthoi_Eviscerator -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
r/iamverysmart
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnAngryYordle -4 points-3 points-2 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Many gifted people do have issues specific to them. This is something most people that never had to deal with this will never understand. We‘re not trying to brag, we‘re trying to combat our unique problems and we won’t be able to do that unless we talk about it.
Have you ever had the issue of feeling like you don’t really fit into any social group? Or at least not in the same way others do? Have you had issues in school, where you were bored a ton and later had issues not being able to keep up because you never learned how to actually learn? Have you ever had the issue of when you were a kid everybody thinking you were some sort of genious, putting extreme pressure on your performance, which it’s difficult to impossible to hold up to and maybe even break under? Gifted kids are more likely to develop mental health issues, especially depression and that‘s a serious issue that has to be touched. People like you make it so much harder for us.
When I was a teenager and my life was in shambles, with me sitting in front of my computer 24/7 and not going to school, my parents urged me to go to a nearby meetup of highly gifted teenagers. At first I refused because I thought it sounded snobby and elitist, but when I actually gave in and went there once it turned my life around. The people were down to earth, fun to hang out with and very different from each other, from nerds to metalheads to stoners to people that seemed very normal to sporty types... It was the first time in my life I felt like I had a proper circle of friends that actually cared about me. I think until I was 16 I had 2 genuine friends in my entire life.
Even nowadays I keep thinking about what might‘ve happened if I never went there. At those meetups I learned social skills I never developed before, I went from being a social outcast to having friends for life, some of which I‘m still in contact with now that I‘m in my mid 20‘s. If I had never went there I probably would’ve jumped off a bridge years ago.
So for fucks sake stop shaming people for talking about the issues that being gifted brings with it. We haven’t done anything to you and if you haven’t experienced it yourself you‘ll be unable to relate. We‘re not trying to be elitist. We‘re simply trying to talk about our unique hardships and trying to find solutions.
[–]Cough_andcoughmore 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Sounds like my ADHD
[–]AnAngryYordle 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, I can imagine other types of neurodivergent people have similar struggles.
[–]bradlav -2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You’re implying freedom and money for the time to read.
[–]lnsewn12 -2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Top-Lychee5359 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What's your process? Seems like you could be in a store for hours before seeing anyone you'd be interested in chatting up. Like the idea, though. Curious: Has any girl just said, 'Yeah, I know of a book club." How do transition into getting a date with her there? My only issue with this is that it might be seem obvious to her that I'm asking about the book club just to ask her out. Might this be a put-off to some ladies?
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
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