What keeps you going after all the L’s?

TransportationJumpy6 · 2025-01-27T23:35:07+00:00

Out of all the L’s. The one time you hit, all those L’s will become self evident that they were necessary for you to refine your game and become comfortable with having casual conversations with women. So long as you stay aware of your growth and where you may be lacking…. Take the L’s let them roll like water off a ducks back lol because it’s not a matter of IF but WHEN (there’s a ton of women out there). Lastly remember progress not perfection.

durkiobro · 2025-01-27T23:44:45+00:00

Been thinking this today. Fumbled a girl I really liked today and it got me thinking - I genuinely don’t know why I’m still doing this.

The_rock_hard · 2025-01-28T00:31:16+00:00

Because not knowing is worse than losing. I learned that lesson enough times that I don't mind the losses anymore - at least I know she's not interested. So many what ifs from when I first started dating at age 27 after my marriage fell apart. No more what ifs these days.

Sometimes too what was once an L becomes a dub. I've got 400+ numbers in my phone. You'd be surprised how often an old name pops up unexpectedly.

Wrong_Winner_9645 · 2025-01-27T23:36:56+00:00

Welcome to the experience for 80% of men. You’re a man. You are not given your value, you must build it. Keep grinding, and improving yourself. Keep facing rejection, and go all in with each interaction you have. I used to hate the fact that I had to put in all of this work on myself in order to get what I wanted, but I’m starting to see the fruits of my labor pay off. Once you see attractive women starting to give you the attention you desire, looking at you as if you are a chad, you will realize it was all worth it. It will become a positive addiction. Trust and BELIEVE in yourself. Each and everyday you wake up. Also, an abundance mentality helps. I’m starting to be able to build options for myself, which helps me not fixate on the women that turn out to be duds.

UltraAirWolf · 2025-01-28T02:43:28+00:00

Dude.

I am a door to door salesman, and you know what the number one thing you learn is? Rejection doesn’t matter. It just doesn’t fucking matter. It says nothing about you. Some will, some won’t, so what, who’s next?

And if you’re getting rejected to the point where you’re posting about it

1) good work because you must at least be taking risks and shooting your shot

2) if L’s bother you then you still have a lot of work to do. When you truly don’t care about the outcome, whether she likes you or laughs at you, and when you are just having fun you will see your results improve.

Change the way you look at it. It’s all a video game. You’re just trying shit out and getting good. It just takes patience. Stop believing that L’s matter. They only matter if you have a lot of them in your social circle. L’s don’t matter. It’s an illusion. Don’t buy into it.

NASA-Almost-Duck · 2025-01-27T23:57:00+00:00

The W's

I'm not sure how this sub got in my algo, but I think that's just a good answer for a non specific question.

grldgcapitalz2 · 2025-01-28T01:05:59+00:00

i just broke a 1.5 year dryspell my roughest was 6 years and im at my peak fitness i just really gotta narrow down inner game because everytime i see a 0 with a dime im reminded it happens all the time and i have no one to blame but myself

LizzoBathwater · 2025-01-28T02:14:04+00:00

The only L’s I take are from myself, from being such a pathetic pussy who can’t work up the courage to approach girls because I’m scared of what others might think

I think I might actually have some success if I ever grow a fucking pair, that’s what keeps me going I guess

thiswontlastlongv · 2025-01-28T04:33:40+00:00

It’s a numbers game

If you saw a man with 3 girlfriends you’d say that’s a lot

But to get those 3 he might have spoken to 3000 women. You don’t see the 3000 you just see 3.

JayDillon24 · 2025-01-28T02:43:32+00:00

I kinda just stopped caring about a lot of things. If you succeed great, if you don’t oh well. The world is a messed up place but there’s still good in it

“I have decided to be happy because it’s good for my health” -Voltaire

Nanashi_x01 · 2025-01-27T23:43:49+00:00

I take a break for few days and then I forget the interactions and restart as blank slate. And then I remember the reason I am doing this:-

I am not gonna be anymore younger.
I am gonna die someday.
I have seen girls who I would consider out of my league, wanting me. Some girls whose eyes sparkle when I meet them, who try to kiss me, who try to win me over, who just stare at me and smile. To find those girls, I remind myself I have to go through this pain.

Wean1eHu11 · 2025-01-28T00:14:00+00:00

“Get busy living or get busy dying”. Taking Ls sucks, and there’s a lot of things about dating that sucks, but your only other option is to give up, and then you’ll definitely get nothing

Dwerg1 · 2025-01-28T01:32:45+00:00

I stopped expecting things to go my way all the time. It is what it is and instead of wasting any further energy on feeling bad about it I'd rather spend it on the next thing.

I either can or can't do something about a situation, if there is something I can do I just do what I can do. If I can't do anything about it then there is no better option than to accept it, let it go and move on.

Things won't always go my way, that is just a fact of life, one that all people gets exposed to their entire lives. There's a choice here, to keep going until you learn enough from failure to reach success or to guarantee chronic failure by choosing it.

There is no "not keep going". Time moves forward whether I want it to or not, I continue existing in this moment and the next. You can keep going doing the same thing, in the same way and get roughly the same result. You can keep going doing the same thing, in a different way and hopefully get a different result. You can keep going doing something else if you're tired of doing the same thing for whatever reason. Due to the existence of time though, you can at a later time go back to doing what you were doing before, this is called a break.

I think you might need one of those breaks. Give up for a little bit, take a step back, reflect on your experience and do something else entirely that would make you feel better. When you've recovered, feeling better and possibly full of ideas after your reflections, then you can go back at it again.

Sometimes the best thing you can do is to not keep going, but that doesn't mean you have to stop forever. In fact, if you take a break it's only a matter of time before the drive to continue this pursuit kicks in again.

FriendlyWrenChilling · 2025-01-28T03:03:33+00:00

Winners are the biggest faliures. Every faliure is another step forward, I've probably failed more than you've even tried. That's why you should keep going.

shathecomedian · 2025-01-28T03:07:00+00:00

Honestly, probably the fear that if I don't keep going then ill be stuck looking at porn alone, never having a family or having one with the wrong type of woman which is even worse. It ain't easy in the slightest but the alternative is Grimm

hunterpua · 2025-01-28T05:15:18+00:00

Having a clear picture of where I'm at and why I'm taking L's.

If I can see that I'm making progress then the rejections won't bother me as much because I can see that I'm eventually gonna experience less of that.

People who don't understand what's going on don't have any sense of progress and don't know when they're repeating mistakes or fixing them.

This is why its important to also be educated in how this stuff works. Yes, experience is king but if all you're doing is going out and flirting with girls without improving your understanding of the psychology of seduction by consuming material on it, not by making up your own theories, then you will still fail.

It would be like getting a lot of experience in boxing without getting any formal training. You wouldn't stand a chance against someone who has been formally trained for a year, even if you had 3 years worth of experience.

Kofuku- · 2025-01-28T06:29:11+00:00

Because if I DONT keep going, it’ll NEVER happen.

That was the TL:DR of it. I make fun of myself along the way of the L’s. Being 0/89, you’d wonder why I’m even counting. It’s weird right? But I’m counting because I am making light of the situation as I get through the L’s. “Try for 100” I’d say. Maybe it’ll hit 200 by the time I’m 35. These are all me being serious and asking girls out. Each time, I learn a bit more about myself and women. For the most part, I never ever got to truly show them my life and my personality and my value to even give a girl a chance to be attracted to me. And as I continue, I’ll keep figuring out ways to change that.

Informal_Sherbert251 · 2025-01-28T15:47:23+00:00

Biggest thing is it’s necessary to take breaks. Never giving up is the main philosophy behind it all but there’s no rules out there. The only goal is what you make, and as long as you aren’t hurting anyone intentionally then there’s no damages done.

Take yourself out, have fun, don’t worry about the fine women out there cause they will be out there regardless. When you work up the courage again, try again.

Would highly recommend though changing your philosophy of success. It’ll help your mindset when actively out there. Listen to the “Girls Chase” podcast or go to their website and read up to help the inner dialogue you may have when dealing with “failure”. Some things are worth missing out on. Some women out there are crazy and wanna have a kid with you, have you help take care of her kids, or get you with a strap-on. So every time there’s a loss, shrug it off and look forward to the next win. Hope this helps.

Mc_Dickles · 2025-01-28T02:32:45+00:00

The high from a W wipes those L’s from your memory quick.

Elbynerual · 2025-01-28T05:42:05+00:00

The Ws.

washington_breadstix · 2025-01-28T07:26:19+00:00

I'm horny.

Dandys3107 · 2025-01-28T10:35:37+00:00

You don't try, you never win. But forcefully pushing is hardly ever a good strategy, you should analyse the feedback and utilize different approaches until you find some new breakthrough.

i_am_smoothbrain · 2025-01-28T11:03:51+00:00

I have to keep trying, that's all there is to it. I'll feel worse of I just give up

Forward-Grass5421 · 2025-01-28T13:09:38+00:00

I'm 28, but one day I'd like to not be a virgin I guess. I just don't want a ONS because then it could be another year before something happens. I need consistent and sustainable results, or perhaps a relationship

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2025-01-28T13:29:36+00:00

I only know W's.

No-Preference8767 · 2025-01-29T11:38:22+00:00

It's still interesting to push past my flaws And I've had tastes of success I want to replicate ( unhealthy motivation but it's true )

Once it's not interesting to me I'll stop meeting new women

MineDesperate2920 · 2025-01-30T04:25:22+00:00

That I have a biological need to have sex or mate lol. Otherwise I’d likely have quit. Even tho I love women.

jamnoNewEpoch · 2025-01-28T10:00:22+00:00

Wtf is L’s ???

Why do I have to more often than is comfortable dig into the context or online search for explanation of abbreviations?

Title	What keeps you going after all the L’s?
Author	decal1210
Upvotes	52
Comments	44
Date	January 27, 2025 11:22 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ibndba/what_keeps_you_going_after_all_the_ls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-keeps-you-going-after-all-the-ls.1542346 https://theredarchive.com/post/1542346

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