Hook-up culture is pretty disgusting and deplorable.

chingness · 2022-12-28T07:10:50+00:00

If you don’t want to engage in something - don’t. You don’t need to worry about those who do. Why do you even care?

I haven’t engaged in it personally but I don’t give a f about people doing it. Let people live

MarBitt · 2022-12-28T09:08:45+00:00

Most people never practice safe sex during hook-ups,

Data from YouGov (2017) reveals that one in four men have had unprotected sex with their one-night stands, as well as 14% of women. 14% of respondents say they never practice safe sex.

So if you know hook ups as an environment where most people don't use protection, then you've experienced them in a particularly dangerous and risky environment. Only the stupidest 14% never use protection during hook-ups.

https://today.yougov.com/topics/society/articles-reports/2017/08/14/one-four-men-have-had-unprotected-sex-one-night-st

I feel like most people who do it are the ones who came from bad backgrounds like dysfunctional homes and broken homes.

When you consider how different your personal experience of using protection is compared to the statistics of the general population, it's clear that your experience of hookups is probably different in other ways as well. You simply know the dirtiest, most miserable, and most risky way to practice casual sex, and you judge casual sex in general by that.

DiamondLilyD · 2022-12-28T07:04:43+00:00

"I tried this and did not enjoy it so its bad for everyone"

2022-12-28T08:43:28+00:00

Do you have a degree to say these people are fucked up and can never be fixed!!! What about the ones that are fucked up by men you are very judgmental these people didn't ask to be born and I bet you anything they would give up anything to be able to choice rather to be born or not. I personally would have never been born!!! I didn't choose my parents. So why don't you go educate yourself about these people you say are not fixable your basically saying they don't deserve to be loved. Would you be saying this if it was someone you loved that hates themselves and wants to die because of the things they went through that wasn't their fault!!

MouthSandTeethTongue · 2022-12-28T06:45:06+00:00

I feel like there's a lot of projection going on.

Having safe, consensual sex for physical pleasure won't cause any damage. It's all about the mindset of the people involved. Sure, lots of people hook up for the wrong reasons. And if people are hooking up for the wrong reasons, like to cope with emotions/trauma, then sure, it's bad. But same can be said for anything. Being in long term relationships for the wrong reasons can be bad just as well. Sex with a husband or wife can lead be traumatic too. Heck, sugar can be a dangerous addiction. So can studying or exercise. It's all about the mental health and mindset of the people involved not the "acts."

Just because something that doesn't work for you/doesn't make you feel good doesn't not mean it can't work just fine for other people. One can 100% hook up and not do it due to trauma or become traumatized/damaged from it.

Cor_ay · 2022-12-28T07:19:18+00:00

The unfortunate reality of this conversation is that it is quite pointless.

People who like to engage in hook-up culture will just continue to do so and believe it has no effect whatsoever. That’s fine, let them do so.

I never believed in it, I’m 26, and I have been with my girl for 7 years. We both never believed in it, and I think this has brought us a lot of success.

Over the past 6 years I built my business, we have amazing lives, our relationship is traditional and very functional. Other people ask her and I how we have been able to do so well and keep things good, I believe a very large part of it is because we both never picked up any baggage….

We’ve been free from all the pitfalls most others will fall down from chasing what’s expedient, rather than what is actually meaningful, and that has bled it’s way into most of our other habits and overall life.

Everyone has their guilty pleasures, but in this case, I see wayyy too many people who indulge in this guilty pleasure that are guilty of applying that same idea of immediate pleasure to the rest of their decisions they have to make in life.

Sofia_sticated91 · 2022-12-28T10:04:47+00:00

TLDR: pussy good and variety is the spice of life

Bitter much?

They're simply trying to mend something that is broken beyond repair

Possible. But the truth is, I just love women too much. So many amazing women in the world, why be content with one? It gets boring after a while.

It is that innocence and purity that really keeps you from just fucking like animals.

Innocence and purity? Didn't realise we were raising sacrificial virgins for Satan

Just image being a father or mother in your 30s, with a high body count. Are these the things you want to instill in your children?

No children. They are whiny, annoying and sex falls off a cliff more often than not after having them. Not to mention the horrendous ordeal that women have to go through to birth them and it ruins their body

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2022-12-28T07:41:08+00:00

Those who can't, complain.

MouthSandTeethTongue · 2022-12-28T06:19:33+00:00

I just wish society would accept my way of life.

GhostofCamus · 2022-12-28T06:26:36+00:00

pretty sure i have a fucking yeast infection as well

you may hook up with people you have known for years already but that doesnt mean you trust them to respect your body

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-12-28T07:28:26+00:00

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fakingandnotmakingit · 2022-12-28T08:27:52+00:00

Jeez

I may not have been into it but it doesn't affect you at all.

Just don't date people who've done it and you're fine instead of whinging about it

obviousredflag · 2022-12-28T09:14:22+00:00

Just image being a father or mother in your 30s, with a high body count. Are these the things you want to instill in your children?

Yes.

Learn about sociosexuality. Not all people see sex like you.

Historical-System972 · 2022-12-28T11:19:35+00:00

Good thing it doesn't exist then.

psd5 · 2022-12-28T11:28:00+00:00

coping mechanisms are just a way to cover up some mental and heavy emotional damage.

I have to jack off about 3-4 times a day because i never have had any female positive feedback in my life from a girl that loves or desires me. I discovered to touch myself very late in life (28), besides almost the entirety of people i ever knew of, had it done before 25 years old. And mostly like any of the people in this sub either.

It feels so depressing to never have this pleasant and lovely life experience so I understand they're trying to cope with casual sex like if it was some meds for their emotional traumas.

I can bet a huge amount of people do the same for junk food as well. Things that are never talked about or anybody that can bring up the proper support about it. It's like me with the incel condition being a virgin kissless in 32 years old. People only blame, ridiculize and make bullying of men being inexperienced.

When there's not a person that is there to simply hug you or help to find out solutions, I bet this is our only way to vent our frustrations through coping.

afjje273 · 2022-12-28T07:47:07+00:00

Sex is just adult fun.

Rethink all of this bullshit narrative you have built around it.

Sex is not some magical communion of souls, nor it should be all the time.

Would you want your child to be insecure, frightened and have a important part of their life lacking - or would you want them to live the best life they can have, especially in one of the few avenues that actually makes us feel connected and seen.

armpitpics · 2022-12-28T07:13:26+00:00

Most people don't practice safe sex. Many people enter relationships without a proper STD test and just "trust" their partner to to have anything. It's safe to assume that these people and their partners have also had unprotected sex before without proper testing and without protection. Even if their n-count is low, these people are at a higher risk of catching something than those with a high n count who protect themselves.

People should stop expecting others to conform to their values. Your post says more about your take on hookup culture than it says about people who participate in it.

Mindless-Spare-2454 · 2022-12-28T10:22:53+00:00

Jesus Christ you’re projecting so much! Stop being a whiny little fucker, if you don’t want to partake in hook ups don’t.

If you can’t make a woman orgasm just say it dude! Jesus Christ, your entire post is all me, me, me self entitled bullshit. Leave people to their sexual proclivities and stop judging people! Fun fact you dad has probably ploughed your mom more than 300 times in their marriage. What’s the difference between that and fucking 40/50/60 people.

gobblegoobleoneofus · 2022-12-28T06:59:30+00:00

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carsonisinnocent · 2022-12-28T07:07:57+00:00

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cindyroseex · 2022-12-28T07:12:14+00:00

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livinginlyon · 2022-12-28T07:57:50+00:00

I don't at all engage in hookup culture, but what is a high count? I got married at 18 and we separated after 10 years. I went to Paris for a couple years and kinda went ham for a little bit. I only slept with women that I became very emotionally close with but when I got married my count was at 4 or 5 and my ex wife was supposed to be the last person I would be with. So what is a high count?

dukesaces · 2022-12-28T09:04:00+00:00

Some people like hookup culture and engaging in hookups and some people don't. There isn't necessarily one correct way to approach sex and relationships. While I do believe hookup culture can be damaging, especially for women that actually want monogamous relationships, it isn't necessarily wrong and you won't convince the people that engage in it to stop doing so anyway.

I just think people need to go for the kind of partner that echos their own lifestyle preferences. For instance I dislike hookup culture so I wouldn't even consider getting with someone that participates in it. Even if they're perfect in all other ways, the separation of love and sex is disgusting to me personally. If other people wish to do it though, that's their choice.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-12-28T09:07:48+00:00

Don’t like it don’t do it

Also lots of people use protection

RocinanteCoffee · 2022-12-28T10:29:23+00:00

44% practice safe sex (condom use) during hookups. While not great it's almost half.

While there are some people who do not practice safe sex there are many safe health options for people to prevent STIs and pregnancy:

Spermicidal gel films and applicators
PrEP (can be taken by any gender, any orientation to prevent HIV)
Over the counter 15 minute saliva tests for STIs (taken in the home, results in 15 minutes, quick STI tests, though somewhat expensive $50-70 for two tests) but not bad
Birth control pills
Condoms
Cervical caps
Dental Dams
Health Clinic STI tests

And more.

Most unprotected sex occurs in demographics such as abstinence only educated counties with underfunded women's health education and co-ed health clinics and also retirement communities (US) as well as college campuses primarily in and around religious communities or in red states or states with poor education in general (weekly reminder that BYU had an armpit crab outbreak and ASU has a ton of syphillis), that has more of an impact on unsafe hookups than "broken homes".

It is their coping mechanism much like alcoholism and drug use.

Some definitely are addicted, but it's much less common to have a sex addiction and much, much easier to treat than alcoholism or other drug addiction

I only had a couple of hook-ups but honestly, I enjoyed dating and showing a girl a good time through doing fun activities, holding hands,

So you tried hookups and made a decision it was not for you, just as many try hookups and determine it very much is for them.

You can still hold hands and have casual conversations with hookups. More than a third of marriages begin with a casual hookup (US).

Building sexual tension without the sex is one of the most gratifying things you can ever do,

Pleasure delaying can definitely titillate, but usually not for long, and not for everyone. Glad it works for you though.

It is that innocence and purity that really keeps you from just fucking like animals.

Animals are innocent too. They are also very, very carnal in many instances.

There can be wholesomeness in casual sex, it's all about how you treat each other.

Just image being a father or mother in your 30s, with a high body count.

Most people have had several sexual partners by the time they are in their thirties, not everyone wants kids. Those who have high body counts usually have no problem becoming parents (better odds anyway they more times they have sex).

Are these the things you want to instill in your children? To sleep with 100 hundreds of guys or girls?

No parents should talk about their n-count with their child, that seems inappropriate and TMI.

Could you imagine your son or daughter getting rammed by multiple people because she loves it?

You're really not supposed to imagine your children's sex lives; that's kind of weird. But any good parent hopes their child grows up to choose the life they want free from shame and full of options to forge their own path.

Odd-Luck7658 · 2022-12-28T11:56:29+00:00

Your opinion. I see nothing wrong with dating and being sexually active. No need to share your sexual history with your children.

Title	Hook-up culture is pretty disgusting and deplorable.
Author	MachoManIto
Upvotes	24
Comments	92
Date	December 28, 2022 6:15 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/zx298o/hookup_culture_is_pretty_disgusting_and_deplorable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/hook-up-culture-is-pretty-disgusting-and.1213321 https://theredarchive.com/post/1213321

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