Ladies - The More Times You Had Sex With A Casual Hook Up, Did You Start Developing Feelings?

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-09-01T21:08:54+00:00

Yes, up to a point. I'll develop feelings over time, but if it doesn't go anywhere I get distracted by the next guy. If I had to give a time-line, it's like a month or two max.

ashpr0ulx · 2022-09-01T21:12:55+00:00

if i know it’s casual, i don’t catch feelings. i just turn that part of my brain off like a light switch

Blame_the_Muse · 2022-09-01T21:09:32+00:00

If I have any desire to have sex with a guy more than once, ever, there are feelings at least a little involved for me. I do tend to get attached quickly to people and have to manage that carefully.

throwawaylessons103 · 2022-09-01T21:50:58+00:00

I've never had a "FWB" where we didn't do something else on top of having sex.

With my old FWBs, we'd usually go out for drinks/food, or watch Netflix and talk, or hang out with friends of ours together...

It's never been just "wham bam thank you ma'am."

So yeah, I've developed feelings for most of my FWBs. Liking hanging out with someone + attraction is usually how I end up wanting sex with someone.

Glad-Improvement-812 · 2022-09-01T21:19:20+00:00

Yeah, I only want to screw guys I actually like more than once. I can compartmentalise up to a point but it’s generally got a very short lifespan. Easier if I’m not seeing them frequently, say only once or twice a month. But fucking someone you’re getting into who then ends it to start actually seeing someone else is the pits and it’s just not worth hanging in for that to happen no matter how great a lay they are.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2022-09-01T23:33:17+00:00

Good fucking isn't love, honey but it is close. I can love a man that isn't any good for me if the sex is out of this world to the point where I am returning, if that is the question. But I can't fall in love with him; I can't be in love with someone I don't even like, but I can love 'em enough to come back for sex over and over and over again.

I had a partner that was in love with me to the core. I told them I wasn't in love and it'd never happen. But I loved the hell out of the sex. I was addicted. I couldn't get enough. I loved them too. I swore up and down I did. I'd defend them to my last breath but I was never in love with them. They were never happy with me because of it. It was toxic.

femm-fatale · 2022-09-01T21:23:50+00:00

Everyone gets attached to whoever they sleep with even if they’re obese/disgusting 😳 it’s human nature

SouthernGrass3 · 2022-09-01T22:15:08+00:00

I’ve only had exclusive relationships, so I can only half-answer, but the number of times I was intimate didn’t seem to affect my romantic feelings.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-09-02T08:57:09+00:00

It’s some men I did others not.

But if I’m having good sex and enjoy spending time with them then yes I will in most cases

DXBrigade · 2022-09-02T22:56:45+00:00

Nope, I don't bond over sex alone.

Global-Bridge-6787 · 2022-09-04T02:03:43+00:00

If feelings = fixation, yes 100%. I could feel indifferent about a guy I'm dating but after we have sex a few times, I do feel a shift within me. I know because of this casual sex is not an option for me anymore. I haven't had casual sex in years (I'm 28) but I remember it made me fall for losers. Hindsight 20/20!

ohdiddly · 2022-09-04T04:47:42+00:00

Let's say you are seeing this f-buddy 3 times a week and at every meeting, he makes you cum... do you start developing some sort of feelings or attachment towards him?

Well I've had this exact arrangement before, and whilst we definitely grew closer as friends, there was not a single moment where I thought "I want to date this guy". Not once.

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2022-09-02T01:04:10+00:00

No. I don't really equate sex to love and sex doesn't have to involve feelings. If I choose to actively foster a relationship, sure. But no, I've never gotten feelings for a fwb, even when they wanted to date, were good in bed, and were good looking.

Usually some type of personality incompatibility or life-stage timing automatically meant I wasn't going to develop feelings for them because I wasn't looking to date them. There was no reason to foster feelings.

lady_ven0m · 2022-09-02T02:58:16+00:00

I actually get bored of the casual sex partners. It’s usually once or twice max. I have caught feelings for guys after the first time but we had chemistry outside of the bedroom too. I catch feelings for some guys and not for others, and the ones I catch feelings for it’s because there’s mutual chemistry.

Apprehensive_Cut_146 · 2022-09-02T07:10:30+00:00

I never had sx outside a relationship based on romantic interest.

2022-09-02T11:53:49+00:00

Sometimes I do sometimes I don't. If I develop feelings and they feel the same way then we start dating. If I develop feelings and they don't, I let myself feel sad for a bit and then move on.

TheElusivePeacock · 2022-09-02T14:29:04+00:00

No. I’ve actually only had feelings for one person I had sex with. And that was a LTR and we didn’t sleep with each other for the 6 months. I’ve had FWB for as long as 2 1/2 years, never developed any sort of feelings for them.

bunnakay · 2022-09-02T23:26:32+00:00

If it's just a hookup, I'm not going to see him more than that one time anyway.

Psych_FI · 2022-09-06T04:00:02+00:00

I can’t imagine being willing to see a guy 3 times a week for sex and not liking them tbh. I’m an super introverted though. Whether I’d think dating was a realistic possibility is an entirely different matter.

But I know women who it wouldn’t mean anything.

CranberryRich2933 · 2022-09-09T13:40:10+00:00

I have a long term partner now but no, I wouldn't have developed feelings in this situation. I've been in it multiple times and it's just sex.

Title	Ladies - The More Times You Had Sex With A Casual Hook Up, Did You Start Developing Feelings?
Author	theorangesmile
Upvotes	17
Comments	64
Date	September 1, 2022 9:05 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/x3il58/ladies_the_more_times_you_had_sex_with_a_casual/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/ladies-the-more-times-you-had-sex-with-a-casual.1130446 https://theredarchive.com/post/1130446

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