The basis of gender and different levels of desire.

2022-12-17T09:49:46+00:00

I think it's hard for a lot of men to accept that nothing in life is guaranteed, especially stuff that includes other people... relationships, sex, having a family.

It's easier to blame the women who don't want those things with them, than it is to learn how to be happy despite not having everything they want.

Yeah, sex is nice and all, but like... it's far from the most important thing out there.

ManWazo · 2022-12-16T21:13:03+00:00

Cis men have an immense ego and think they are the center of the world, this is why.

Doinpromo · 2022-12-16T19:19:47+00:00

It's the context

The Bored Sex

Women, more than men, tend to feel stultified by long-term exclusivity—despite having been taught that they were designed for it.

Cult_of_Chad · 2022-12-16T20:20:48+00:00

The male sex drive feels like building pressure, it doesn't diminish and you can't sleep it off. The volume of the testicles perceptibly increase when a man is pent up and you can literally feel it. From the inside and outside, physically, the fullness and weight.

I would compare the feeling to one of addictive withdrawal, almost. A craving that lowers inhibitions, reorders priorities and impairs cognition. It can become all you can think about; your senses become hyper aware to arousal queues such as scents, sounds and and visual triggers.

And when you cum it's like a veil being lifted, like taking off sunglasses. I don't think it's possible for females to understand, at a fundamental level because even the anatomy involved has no analogues.

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WilliamWyattD · 2022-12-17T14:08:43+00:00

I don't think most men feel their sex drive should determine the amount of sex in a relationship. What they get wrong is the idea that a fair compromise is meeting half way. Often it means doing what you can to up the sex drive of the lower libido partner, but after than accepting sex on the terms of the partner with the lower drive. Or breaking up.

It is better to be having sex less often than you'd ideally want than for the lower libido partner to almost ever have sex when not in the mood.

prizefighterstudent · 2022-12-16T20:44:47+00:00

It is difficult to divorce sexual arousal from objectification. While the female sexual fantasy is often associated with being "taken", the male sexual fantasy is associating with "taking". The parts of the brain that light up for male arousal are the same when operating a tool / machinery with strong focus.

Why do you think the experience of being infatuated, hating somebody, lusting for somebody, or religious epiphany / immersion are all described with this level of obsession from a male lens? It's because it is an experience of pure focus. It becomes a sort of hypnosis, or hyper-fixation if not quelled, or handled with some maturity / fortitiude.

Bikerbats · 2022-12-16T19:20:13+00:00

Male and female desire is different, and it's why half the incels here think women don't like sex. My wife is likewise HL, and she's always freely admitted that male sexual urge is well, more urgent. I'm damned near 60 now, and even at my age I cannot intensely want sex and set it aside for days. Doesn't work that way for us.

_Fern · 2022-12-16T19:39:11+00:00

If you partner wants it more urgently than you, then your libidos are not the same. You can still have libido, but if one of you wants sex more than the other then they have a higher libido.

Nearby-Dimension1839 · 2022-12-16T20:53:31+00:00

"Why do so many men believe that their sex drive should determine the amount of sex in the relationship?" - I think this all comes down to "monogamous" relationship. Before we move further, I hope we can agree on and establish a few things:

First, I believe we would all agree that we all have sexual desires(a form of basic human drives), and we should be allowed to pursuit it without stripping the rights of others or endangering others freely.

Second, is in a monogamous relationship, basically both parties are agreed to commit their genitals to each other, which becomes exclusive and should be prohibited to carry this activity with others.

All in all, if you are only allowed to eat from a sole provider, and the sole provider is not providing; this is very hard to justify, hence, in legal settings if a spouse does not allow the partner to have sex for a long time without sufficient reason, it is normally considered as emotional abuse or mental cruelty.

I believe that is the rationale behind it, however, if a person got rejected once or twice and is crying for a divorce, I think they probably shouldn't get married to start off with.

Obviously this does not make the HL one entitled to sex 24/7, hence the "Marital rape".

A bit off topic is I believe both parties should try to accommodate each other; I am a HL and I have to jerk myself off a lot of the times, and I talked to my wife a lot and she does try to do it more. I think just like any kind of good relationship, it only works when you consider each other and try to make it work.

obviousredflag · 2022-12-16T20:59:25+00:00

Women are determining the amount of sex in the relationships on average.

Look at how much sex lesbians have.

Look at how much sex heteros have.

Look at how much sex gays have.

As you can imagine, the only difference between a gay man and a hetero man is who they are attracted to, and not how much sex they want to have. Women are keeping men from living the male sexual dream life that gay men live with each other.

Lesbians only have a little less sex than heteros. Meaning that hetero women get basically ALL of their preferences with hetero men, and only give a tiny bit towards what men would want to have.

Anykindofland · 2022-12-16T20:43:42+00:00

why do so many men believe that their sex drive should determine the amount of sex in the relationship?

Simple: Because men initiate it. Their sex drive is literally the one thing that determines how much sex happens because with out it, nothing would happen at all.

gymbro718nyc2 · 2022-12-16T19:50:26+00:00

The big difference between male and female sexual desire is that female sexual desire is for the purpose of fertilizing her eggs. Male sexual desire is, for the lack of better expression, all about cleaning our pipes.

Willing_Air_1912 · 2022-12-17T04:27:53+00:00

Men have more testosterone than women the primary sex hormone. Men want it more. If we all waited for women to desire it, the human race would have died out a long time ago. Male sex drive preserves the human race as much as the progressive left hates men

Best_Illustrator_137 · 2022-12-17T05:49:12+00:00

Cause he’ll either get it from you or from someone that’s not you.

Popeman79 · 2022-12-16T20:45:04+00:00

What men don't understand is that it's the one thing we can't get outside of an exclusive relationship. And it can be only 10-15 min of daily effort for a woman, which we don't consider to be SUCH a sacrifice. We don't need anything else to be happy basically. For us it's like a daily sickness, and only our partner has the cure.

If I could make my wife happy and peaceful with only 15 min of daily effort, that I am the only one able to provide, I wouldn't think twice. I wouldn't think about my pride, gender norms, etc. I'd give her what she needs, because I love her and she can't get it elsewhere. And it's only 15 freaking minutes..

I believe women demand much more from their men than 15 min of daily efforts, between all the talking, emotional support, chores, etc

So I don't feel entitled, but if my girl would rather have me jumpy and in a bad mood than giving me a few minutes of love than only she can give, then she definitely doesn't love me.

By the way you know how you get a man who doesn't want regular sex? You either get a fat slob with low testosterone who doesn't need sex, or you get a man who'd rather suffer and jerk off to porn than leave, because he doesn't have other options.

Safinated · 2022-12-16T21:38:46+00:00

Desire is the primary driver of many of this sub’s predominant gender

Coolio_Street_Racer · 2022-12-17T16:48:46+00:00

I think you see a relationship as both people are equal. Therefore the same rules apply to both people.

We do not view it the same way. The way we see it is there is more expected from men by society and women. Therefore what we get is inherently unequal as the effort required for the same result, a relationship is not equal.

Ultimately you have a drastically different view of love and dating as most men do here. We see it as biological process and a market place derivied from that process. You see it as sense of spiritual connection and partnership.

I know I'm making alot of assumptions about you. But in reality it's the just the difference between the way RP and BP view love and dating.

icefire54 · 2022-12-18T05:58:52+00:00

The idea that women don't feel entitlement to sex is laughable. Women are more likely to feel entitlement towards men in general than vice versa, including sex and wealth. And if we are just looking at wealth (which men in general definitely feel less entitled to than sex) then I would much rather someone feel like they are "entitled" to my body just for sex than for hard labor. The latter is much more of a burden than sex that many women feel entitled to.

Title	The basis of gender and different levels of desire.
Author	Dependent_Vast_4272
Upvotes	21
Comments	206
Date	December 16, 2022 7:17 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/znmltg/the_basis_of_gender_and_different_levels_of_desire/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-basis-of-gender-and-different-levels-of-desire.1143623 https://theredarchive.com/post/1143623

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