Anti-male sentiment on the left from the perspective of a trans woman

SamaelET · 2023-04-04T20:41:01+00:00

Because I am not a boy, but I had a boyhood. I was, and am, made to live as a boy and I cannot suspend the perspective that gave me and join in when it’s time to fluster one of those clueless fuckers into anger by calling him a fuckboi and then tell him his anger proves he’s a fuckboi, or to humiliate one with an OKCupid screenshot because we’ve willfully conflated the clumsy ones with the threatening ones so we can grab those solidarity faves. It’s fucked up. It has metastasized.

Should we consider "fuckboi" as the same as "slut shaming" ? Isn't it the same as "hoe" ? Weird since I though men were praised for fucking around

Another: “It’s a coping habit I’m not proud of. If I agree ‘girls rule boys drool’ it makes me feel more like a girl.”

Is that toxic femininty. Should we say that femininty is rooted in misandry ? /s

Have you noticed, when a product is marketed in an unnecessarily gendered way, that the blame shifts depending on the gender? That a pink pen made “for women” is (and this is, of course, true) the work of idiotic cynical marketing people trying insultingly to pander to what they imagine women want? But when they make yogurt “for men” it is suddenly about how hilarious and fragile masculinity is — how men can’t eat yogurt unless their poor widdle bwains can be sure it doesn’t make them gay? #MasculinitySoFragile is aimed, with smug malice, at men—not marketers.

This is the most important point of this article imo.

knightfluttershy · 2023-04-04T18:43:22+00:00

"I know the trolls—they have tried to be my friends, they have tried to sneak into feminist spaces with no desire to learn or listen."

I tried to go into feminist spaces to "learn and listen" for a while. What happens is, you're hit with tirade after tirade about how worthless you are, how all of your problems or concerns or insecurities are because you, personally, are a piece of shit and how you need to carry all the problems of the world on your back without expecting the slightest bit of decency, empathy or reciprocation in return.

Having "no desire to learn or listen" is the only healthy way to interact with such spaces and such people. It doesn't make you a "troll", it doesn't make you a "sneak", it makes you a normal, healthy human being.

pvtshoebox · 2023-04-04T20:16:55+00:00

Very well written.

I especially liked the content discussing how female feminists will shout down towards any 'man" disagreeing with them. Any disagreement is immediately coded as the man being told he is wrong, followed with a discourse-ending assigned reading (where the feminist recalls who made the argument that cemented her position but can't seem to recall the facts that support their case). If he has already done the reading, that is only further evidence of his male bias.

So male feminists can't disagree with any feminists (while female feminists can disagree with each other as they create an endless number of contradictory ideologies under the same "feminism" umbrella). You can parrot, nod, maybe summarize other works. They don't want male "allies." They want male strength and numbers to be bannermen for them, to help feminism project its power and protect itself from countering opinions.

And even the perfect banner man will be scrutinized and held at arms reach. Female feminists will openly question if their male supporters (not really allies, as the support is non-reciprocal) are only helping due to ulterior motives. One whisper campaign is enough to excommunicate a male feminist.

I am not opposed to the goals of feminism at large. I AM opposed to self-identifying as a feminist because, in practice, my exposure to female feminists is rife with bad faith arguing, gender essentialist mockery, and the tacit understanding that women are entitled to my protecting them from sexism while also accepting that the same women will hurl sexism aimed at me for laughs and for a solidarity I will always be excluded from.

AskingToFeminists · 2023-04-05T06:07:57+00:00

What is disturbing is that the author seems absolutely resigned. The issue of misandry omnipresent in feminism is identified, yet, it seems like there is no other option than being a feminist.

Quix_Nix · 2023-04-05T09:26:20+00:00

This hurts to read. Seeing a trans woman in a TERFish mindset and fighting against it but also embracing it... I'm crying. This whole story, all those memories of childhood, I have those memories. Boyhood as she put it, is not a childhood. I didn't have a child hood until I transitioned, after most people think their childhood is ending.

God, I'm so glad I transitioned. And thank god most cis girls are not feminists. It completely blinds them from understanding anyone but cis women.

WingOutrageous9987 · 2023-04-05T00:06:04+00:00

I grew up among these kind of women and my mom was one of them. I don’t feel liberated at all as they want me to think. Instead I’m left with trauma and a deep existential hatred of women. A misogynist! Who would have thought…

And these are the people who work all over government, crafting policies and writing guidelines for how to treat boys. And then they wonder why men vote for right wing policies…

Atlas421 · 2023-04-05T14:31:53+00:00

I wish people were able to view the present with the same critical eye as they view the past. "Only a cismale would defend a cismale" sounds a lot like the attitude people had (and some still have) towards gays. But it seems people only recognize a historical parallel when the parallel is a literal copy.

Parzival_007 · 2023-04-04T17:41:41+00:00

damn this is a very good read. what a classic writer, damn. Thanks for sharing !

LoganCaleSalad · 2023-04-05T06:25:57+00:00

I see stuff like this from trans people & all I want to do is hug them & tell them they matter & they're accepted. Funny how feminists talk a lot about intersectionality while also continually excluding trans people. It's amazing for all their talk on acceptance & liberalism they end up not being very accepting or liberal. The longer feminism persists the more fascist it becomes. It's ironic how I keep seeing posts by LGBTQ people talking about how they no longer feel comfortable or accepted or safe in feminist groups. My heart bleeds for them as it does for my future children that will possibly be dealing with the absolute worst of this shit if they actually succeed in their mission of replacing the long dead patriarchy with the matriarchy.

oggyb · 2023-04-04T23:00:41+00:00

Really moving article. I can't add anything intelligent to what's already been discussed so I'll just say thanks for posting.

RedSandman · 2023-04-05T10:45:06+00:00

Thank you for posting this, it was a very informative and enjoyable read. (Enjoyable because of the talent of the writer, not the subject matter. I really felt for her.)

It’s very interesting to read this person’s perspective. It’s all too easy to see websites like buzzfeed and the like trot out people who are trans to regurgitate opinions about men and masculinity and think that that must be how most trans people think. Which is, of course, what they want. Might even be what they think. But seeing things like this helps you gain much needed perspective. Thank you to the writer, if she ever sees this.

thepogopogo · 2023-04-05T06:05:21+00:00

This "girl in a boys body" is one of the best writers I've ever read. I don't agree with her, but our perspectives are dramatically different, so I don't expect to. She is however a brilliant and insightful writer.

Comrade9174 · 2023-04-06T22:50:19+00:00

I've decided to make my own anarchist Discord server that upholds this subreddit's values because I keep getting banned from "anarchist" servers because I'm an "incel". If I can't find a safe space then I'll make one.

SexEleven · 2023-04-05T18:40:18+00:00

This is an amazing read and should be archived for this sub. The author captures so much of what we discuss here on both the emotional and cognitive levels.

Title	Anti-male sentiment on the left from the perspective of a trans woman
Author	bejaydocrimes
Upvotes	123
Comments	77
Date	April 4, 2023 4:02 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/12bnk3e/antimale_sentiment_on_the_left_from_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/anti-male-sentiment-on-the-left-from-the.1213139 https://theredarchive.com/post/1213139

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