My wife just told my kids she wanted to stab them, told them they were cunts and that she hated all of us.

plumberack · 2023-06-03T09:49:12+00:00

Lawyer up immediately. You have no idea how many accusations she is about to pin on you. Judge will issue temporary injunction against you to have you removed from the house and it lasts for 3-6 months. In that period, you can neither go back to your home nor you can see your kids. Court doesn't care if she is abusive to your kids.

DifferenceThat8887 · 2023-06-03T10:47:03+00:00

Get a lawyer. Do not leave your wife alone with your kids, and perhaps also see if there are any domestic abuse agencies (ones that specifically state a willingness to recognise and/or help men) so you can get some documentation.

In particular make absolutely sure she isn't alone with the children if she knows you are getting a lawyer and have evidence bscause she might do something drastic.

If you have to contact police as a last resort stress that it is the safety of the children you are worried about and make sure you are not yelling or angry.

CaliFloridaMan · 2023-06-03T12:31:55+00:00

Bro, I have been in your shoes. I’m not gonna lie to you, it’s going to be hard. It’s going to suck. It’s going to get worse. It’s going to take a long time. It’s going to feel unjust and unfair. It’s going to be expensive. But it does get better. Lawyer up. Draw up a parenting plan that you think would work for you both and try and get her to sign it before you do if you can. It will help you save money during the initial part of the process, especially during mediation. Follow what others are saying. Lawyer up. Get a divorce. Save those kids. Save yourself. Life is too short to go through that kind of torture. Your kids don’t deserve that kind of abuse. Neither do you brother. It can and will get better.

Sincerely, A guy who after years of torture, and a lot of money, that now has his son full-time, and is able to protect him and myself.

Edit: is also worth mentioning that I’m happy for the first time in a long, long time.

Edit 2: find a way to insulate yourself from being alone around her. Be on camera if you are around her. Do everything you can to protect yourself from false allegations when she finds out you’re filing for divorce and flies off the handle.

Unnecessary_Timeline · 2023-06-03T11:12:08+00:00

Start recording, pack the kid’s bags while recording, don’t leave them alone with her for a second, drive to a hotel with the kids, call the police and demand a restraining order against her. Get a lawyer. Provide recordings to your lawyer.

In the US, if you are married and these children are biologically yours and hers, or you both adopted the children, then you BOTH have the right to take the children wherever you want without the approval of the other spouse/parent.

In that scenario you both have equal rights to custody of the children.

Take them to a hotel and call the police. Record as you pack and leave. Do not leave your children alone with her.

Halafax · 2023-06-03T13:38:49+00:00

Get a lawyer. In the mean time, read up on grey rock communication. When you stop giving socially combative people the cracks they are looking for, they get bored and look for easier prey. Create a study sheet as soon as possible. The names and numbers of all health care providers for your kids, with all current conditions, prescriptions, and accommodations. Get the names and contact numbers for all teachers, coaches, and extra curriculars. Make a note of which ones would have personally seen you interact with your kids. Get current grades and understand what classes they excel or struggle with. Make a list of your kid's friends, favorite games/movies/music. Study the sheet, prepare to deal with the questions from "experts" that might get to decide how much custody your should have.

BoeingA320neo-9 · 2023-06-03T11:59:37+00:00

Sorry to hear that :(

But it’s time to act asap

Divorce + full custody of kids

All the best And Godspeed 🙏

CutiePie0023 · 2023-06-03T15:09:00+00:00

Lawyer up ASAP

NibblyPig · 2023-06-03T12:17:00+00:00

You need a lawyer and as much audio and video evidence as you can possibly manage

Tiway22 · 2023-06-03T11:42:49+00:00

Dude save your kids get out of there!!! Hotel, police, now.

Ashley4645 · 2023-06-03T14:56:08+00:00

If you leave, take your kids with you. She's mentally unstable.

Acceptable_Visit604 · 2023-06-03T23:06:39+00:00

I'd say evict her (just for the sake of short term safety), get a lawyer and most importantly RECORD EVIDENCE (else it's a man's word against a woman's word and we all know how that will end) and I really suggest you take legal action against her

As you've already said: this can't go on, so do not waste any time! For your own sake and the kids' sake

ijustdontcare74 · 2023-06-03T14:11:01+00:00

File a police report for threatening to harm the kids. You must remove her from the house. Whilst she might be just spouting shit (ie she would never actually harm them) you cannot take that chance, she is now a direct threat to their safety. Contact a lawyer and get her out.

Da_Oi · 2023-06-03T16:02:45+00:00

poor kids. :(

Frostodian · 2023-06-03T17:59:53+00:00

You need to leave her and take your kids.

How are you going to feel if she does anything to your kids? Stranger things have definitely happened and the warning signs are right in your face!

noone_thing · 2023-06-03T14:23:29+00:00

she needs to leave

Squeeze_My_Lemons · 2023-06-03T18:50:31+00:00

Call the police

WoundedHeart7 · 2023-06-03T16:03:42+00:00

Get you children and leave and get a restraining & protection order against her. Look, I know it's not easy, I've been in an abusive relationship before myself but your children are depending on you to make the brave choice, the right choice. You have to leave with them. Take what you and your children can and leave. I'd say you don't have time for a plan so try to get in safe shelter (even if it's a hotel or homeless shelter, if you have a friend or relative or even a kind neighbor who may let you stay over while you make better arrangements which will include looking for places that assist victims of abuse, hopefully there's a place that specifically helps male victims and their children).

MrSalvos · 2023-06-03T16:13:46+00:00

take your kids and leave she seems dangerous so do that and call a lawyer

SympatheticListener · 2023-06-03T16:36:02+00:00

Call the police.

Le_ed · 2023-06-03T17:25:44+00:00

Film everything you can. As a man when this gets to court you will need all the evidence on your side.

MaximumYes · 2023-06-03T18:19:09+00:00

You need to seek an emergency restraining order. Yesterday.

TheKingsPeace · 2023-06-03T21:46:51+00:00

Lawyer up do not leave. Record her if possible

rednoids · 2023-06-04T00:06:25+00:00

Not seeing the advice near the top so I’m giving it.

Call the cops and file a police report based on what she said she wanted to do before she files one.

First to file wins unfortunately.

EMTPirate · 2023-06-04T01:52:22+00:00

Call law enforcement for an involuntarily psych commitment, that is not healthy. You will typically have 72 hours, not counting weekends and holidays (in most states, your experience may vary) to get your things in order and hopefully for them to figure out what is wrong with her.

Then seek a protective order while she is committed, and seek legal advice from a lawyer.

Having experienced domestic violence myself, leave (or make her leave) before it gets worse, and it will get worse.

Shy_starkitten · 2023-06-04T02:27:09+00:00

Next time she says things like that, record it!! Having those audio recordings make a huge difference if you decide (would be a good thing) to leave her and take full custody of the kids. And I am sorry that you and your kids are going through this, I do really hope that things will change and you'll be able to live a stress free life, free from abuse. <3

Rivershots · 2023-06-04T03:28:59+00:00

Dude.... she threatened the kids. Call the cops.

JohnnyUpright9 · 2023-06-03T12:41:17+00:00

Start recording her. You can almost always do this for your own records. Try to build up witnesses and witness statements, including from your kids.

If you can find a friendly heterosexual man counsellor get her to make disclosures in group therapy that you can use in court.

As soon as you have enough ammunition, get her thrown out of the house, jailed, whatever. Get her banned from coming within distance of you or your kids.

KelVarnsenIII · 2023-06-03T14:20:05+00:00

Do not leave, EVER. Once you leave, you've abandoned your kids, your home, your things. Stay and get ready for divorce. She sounds like a god awful person. And remember, your kids are yours too, not just hers. She has no more right to them than you do. Stay strong and good luck.

Original_Dankster · 2023-06-03T14:23:37+00:00

Can you leave with the kids? Got parents or siblings you can stay with? Even friends?

Ronniebbb · 2023-06-03T15:49:07+00:00

Contact a lawyer, document everything that happens and I mean everything. Set up a safe location where you can take the kids and any pets you have and get ready eith phoning the police and divorce papers.

Fair warning this will be the battle of your life and extremely hard to do, but she does sound dangerously deranged

No-Cable7745 · 2023-06-03T16:35:44+00:00

A lawyer can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Get one, two. I try to befriend every lawyer I meet. It never hurts.

druuedd · 2023-06-03T18:48:06+00:00

Ugh awful I’m so sorry

orussell03 · 2023-06-03T20:12:44+00:00

For the love of God. Please record all of this and stay calm. If i was you, I'll take that recording and file for a PO/TRO immediately to put her in her place. After that she will always be the guilty party.

No_Discipline_7867 · 2023-06-03T21:08:04+00:00

Doesn’t surprise me. I’ve heard my daughter’s mother say all kinds of stuff. She’s told me she feels like slapping my daughter even during the times my daughter was just being a normal kid. The one statement by her that really got me was when she told me she felt like throwing our daughter in a dumpster. I lost my shit when she said that.

twisty286 · 2023-06-03T22:00:54+00:00

said plenty of times before but GET A LAWYER, the false accusations are gonna come flooding in and you'll want someone to defend you

JCgamerX · 2023-06-04T01:49:21+00:00

get a protective order for you and the kids and get a lawyer

LetsTalkFV · 2023-06-04T05:22:49+00:00

I hear lots of people cautioning you about recording because it may not be admissible in a court of law.

It may not be admissible in court, but it sure as heck is valid and important evidence in a police investigation - which you should start ASAP.

Even if 1-party recordings aren't admissible in court, contemporaneous notes always are. Start a log of every interaction, every thing your kids tell you, etc... Take those recordings even if only for the sake of your own documentation, even if you never are allowed to play them for another living soul (but I hope you are). Use your recordings to jog your memory - it's a great sanity check down the line when you'll feel like you're losing your mind. Keep them for your children for when they're much older, just in case, who might need to process what they went through.

Don't underestimate the danger to your children - listen to what others are saying here.

Thank you, on behalf of your kids who won't realize this, for sticking with and sticking up for your children. My father didn't stick up for us, but he stayed around for us, which sadly I only realized much later. If he hadn't I literally wouldn't have survived.

Even if it was messy and ugly with lots of shouting (or worse), your children will remember for the rest of their lives that you stood up for them.

Acousmetre78 · 2023-06-04T05:36:44+00:00

My mom did this on a daily basis. My mom was arrested for sexually assaulting us. They just let her go. It was the 80’s no big deal.

Diablo_Canyon2 · 2023-06-03T14:15:03+00:00

Get a lawyer. Start recording everything. Beware of the false restraining orders she will try to file on you. And don't move out of your house.

Glimmerofinsight · 2023-06-03T15:38:34+00:00

Not sure what the law is in your state, but can you call 911 and have her put on a 72 hour hold for mental evaluation? This would also help you if you choose to file for divorce and custody.

ezdiccwad · 2023-06-03T20:39:03+00:00

LAWYER

BamaFan87 · 2023-06-03T21:00:07+00:00

I don't care who the fuck you are you call my kids cunts and say you want to stab them you're catching these hands.

queenAlexislexis · 2023-06-03T21:35:59+00:00

Leave ASAP

ZeeMonkeyMan1 · 2023-06-04T11:18:03+00:00

Thanks to all of you that have given me good advice and support.

I have taken it on board.

WildGrave2 · 2023-06-04T18:12:08+00:00

Step 1. Start gathering evidence, cameras, friends, neighboirs and your kids.

Step 2. Secretly hire a lawyer.

Step 3. Gather all important info about your kids (as another comment said, teachers, coaches etc)

Step 3. While not leaving your kids from your eyes, the moment she threatens you or them again EVICTION, then order a report to be done, then sue. (If the house is not only yours, take the kids to a hotel firsy and THEN order a report/police).

remember first to file wins so be more agreeable so that she wont be as mad until you have completed steps 1 and 2

WeEatBabies · 2023-06-03T13:23:37+00:00

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terroristic_threat

It's a law in many states and she broke it, call the cops and have her feminist @$$ thrown in jail!

freeball_1 · 2023-06-03T14:51:47+00:00

Please get a lawyer take the kids and move out. I would steal my kids in that situation and run away if I had too.

Frird2008 · 2023-06-03T18:11:06+00:00

Definitely get a lawyer, invest in some HIDDEN security cameras (with hidef audio) & record every single interaction good & bad that you & your kids have with your wife. It seems to me from reading your post this isn't the first time it happened & it's a habitual thing. Getting a lawyer on your side is a good choice for both you & your children. I wish you the best of luck & hope things get better for you & your children soon. Act with speed, send the footage to your lawyer & get them on his side before your wife can even think of an accusation to dish up.

Remote_Neck3486 · 2023-06-03T17:45:59+00:00

Instant lawyer up here man, she is about to play the woman card

Scandi_Navy · 2023-06-03T18:14:54+00:00

Record it when you discuss her behaviour with her.

kuzism · 2023-06-03T13:50:51+00:00

Tell her to leave, she hates you and the kids, give her 50 grand and have her sign the no fault divorce papers. I'm guessing she was the hottest piece of ass you ever had and she settled for you because you were a nice guy with a good job and she was approaching 30 and running out of options, she hid the crazy long enough to get the ring and a couple of kids. Fast forward to today she hates being a wife and mother because its a lot of work and she misses her twenties when she was on a yacht with rappers and professional athletes.

pappo4ever · 2023-06-03T18:26:52+00:00

Girls are basically teenagers that have mental breakdowns. What you are experiencing is extremely common and my ex wife said the same to me.

Problem is, those teenagers have the law behind them. Women have mental breakdowns and it is not uncommon for mothers to kill their children.

Talk with the police, they have plenty experience on this cases (I guess 50% of their 911 calls are women going crazy) and try to make her leave while she calms down, and you stay with the kids. But honestly, women always get to stay in the house. Likely you will have to leave, and try to take the kids with you. If she threatened to kill them, its because she likely dont want them, and is seeing another man that she plan to have kids with. Its their instinct talking. They are no that different from hamsters.

If you leave and has to leave the kids with her, call her mom, dad, brothers, etc. Someone stay with her, that way she won't do anything crazy until she calms down. They take about 2 or 3 days to calm down, likely she will have to be under medication too. Most women do this, do no think this is uncommon.

skcuf2 · 2023-06-03T13:10:10+00:00

Poor kids. You should both be ashamed of yourselves. Handle your issues in private like a fucking adult. Your kids remember ALL of this and it's leaving huge impressions on them. Think about all the shit you remember your parents did that they would have no clue about if you asked them.

xMoody · 2023-06-03T14:39:46+00:00

Didn’t happen

keitarofujiwara · 2023-06-03T15:10:18+00:00

Good Lord.

Conduit1245 · 2023-06-03T15:43:25+00:00

Is the evidence which is procured without the knowledge and explicit permission of the other person admissible in court?

There was a case where a man was accused of rape, he took a plea deal to reduce the sentence. After serving his sentence (this man was in High school when accused, he was near 30's while he was out) he confronted the girl and she accepted that she framed him and he has recording of that, there are recordings of her talking with her "friend" about how she framed him, but he can't sue her because she didn't consent to the recordings and have knowledge of it.

This was a while ago, so my memory might be failing me with details, but this was essentially the case. So yes, are recordings without consent admissible in courts?

SamaelET · 2023-06-03T18:39:53+00:00

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/4/d/1UGSG1rKrw0S9VSce1NOO9iG2CdowcfdzKH_EULKtUbE/htmlview

Here is a list of support services for male victims of DV. Which country are you in ? Maybe I know some more.

TheRealRealThang · 2023-06-04T10:07:35+00:00

You know what they say, Snitches get Stitches!

/S

Sterling_UX · 2023-06-04T13:01:16+00:00

Record it, get a solicitor, and get child services involved. She has made a threat to life, you don’t know if there is intent behind it. If they can see how unhinged she is, you should end up with full custody.

AspirationsOfFreedom · 2023-06-04T15:34:20+00:00

Sounds like bait, tbh. This isn't about mens rights, this is a man that needs help ASAP. So lawyer + 911 and a psychiatric visit for her

Nicholas_VI · 2023-06-04T16:08:02+00:00

This is abuse, plain and simple.

SavingInfo · 2023-06-04T18:10:30+00:00

Yeah. Men are who's aggresive. Now I see it. What a sick society to live in.

guppy2019 · 2023-06-04T18:31:47+00:00

Sounds like you married a teenager. Lol

Jamie1897 · 2023-06-05T05:21:56+00:00

Don't EVER leave the familial dwelling as a marriage goes downhill! It creates a nightmarishly bad precedent when you go to litigate in court! Plus consider that she may be about to hit you with a bunch of false accusations! If she verbally threatened you or the kids in any way, it may be worthwhile to get a protection order from the court. That would actually be strongly in your favor going forward.

Title	My wife just told my kids she wanted to stab them, told them they were cunts and that she hated all of us.
Author	ZeeMonkeyMan1
Upvotes	819
Comments	116
Date	June 3, 2023 9:25 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/13z76yq/my_wife_just_told_my_kids_she_wanted_to_stab_them/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/my-wife-just-told-my-kids-she-wanted-to-stab-them.1221147 https://theredarchive.com/post/1221147

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