Discussion: Are women more lenient with weight compared to men?

Ill_Inspection5225 · 2023-09-08T19:34:29+00:00

Generally speaking we’re all wired to be attracted to healthy, fit bodies as our monkey brains see them as the best contenders for healthy offspring.

In my experience, men care more. I’ve seen more couples with a slim girl and overweight man than vice versa but that’s just anecdotal. I think men would also care more about what their friends would say about them dating a fat girl.

CombinationMore4630 · 2023-09-08T18:25:11+00:00

Tbh when I was growing up most of the people now would be considered overweight where I come from... Everyone eats like shit and drives too much

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-09-08T19:51:09+00:00

" For example they’d prefer a tall clearly overweight male over a short fit dude or a wealthier fat guy over a broke fit dude "

As a guy who has dated a lot of obese women, while I'm lean and fit short guy, often they will tell me I'm not even their type, that they actually prefer tall but fat men. Line backer is a term one used. "I am my own type" I've heard again.

So yes, women tend to like BIG men, you can be very fat but you must also be very tall too. Short and fat? No go for them. In my experience, but it's coloured by dating obese women. IDK what thin women want as much.

ratboi34 · 2023-09-08T18:20:27+00:00

Being overweight effects a man's looks more negatively than a woman's. Have you ever seen a chad with a round face? Sharper facial features are one of the most desirable things in men and most men will have the best aesthetics below 15% body fat. Women are not influenced by being overweight as much when it comes to looks. Rounder faces can be attractive. Think about young Selena Gomez. I have seen many chubby women that were pretty, but rarely ever a chubby handsome dude. If you don't believe me you can edit chads and supermodels to be fatter. The women will look prettier. That being said, men have more options to compensate for being overweight tho. Women have more requirements and are pickier, but that comes with the advantage that you can compensate for certain things by fulfilling other standards. A guy might be overweight, but could be very charming, funny, confident, tall, rich, big dicked and so on. Men don't have as many criterias and requirements, so looks are not easy to compensate for. So it's probably a good thing that a little more body fat doesn't effect female attractiveness as much.

DerayRevan · 2023-09-08T18:13:02+00:00

"Unless weight doesn't matter as much to women"

Yes it doesn't since women have other attraction triggers while most triggers for men are based on looks

Most people have that fat friend in school but who still got women, it's a universal experience well least to me

Now before anyone attacks me with their irrational arguments, am not saying being fit isn't important to women as we all know most women would ideally want a healthy fit man, am just saying it's not as important to them compared to men

JumboJetz · 2023-09-09T15:23:06+00:00

Try being a very skinny guy. It’s maybe a step below being morbidly obese in terms of women not getting with you due to your weight.

Fit_Locksmith2035 · 2023-09-08T19:33:43+00:00

As a guy, I’ve been fairly successful in dating, and I can say that even as a young man, being fat rarely mattered.

I was overweight until I was 19 and I still got laid fairly often, then I lost weight and hit the gym yet I had a similar amount of partners, maybe slightly more but I’d attribute that more to added confidence rather than weight.

I’ve said this many times but it is super understated how “normalized” fat straight dudes are

There’s something I’d like to add tho, you have to be able to carry the weight well. At my heaviest my BMI was 31, literally obese but I still had a jawline (and large gut lmaoo) I’m sure there are people who have a round face at BMI 26/27 so being blessed with how your genes decide how to carry fat is a factor.

MidoriEgg · 2023-09-08T19:38:42+00:00

I’ve seen bigger men and bigger women both be successful in relationships. But the women do seem to get judged more for it and it seems like people make more negative connotations about overweight women compared to men of a similar stature. I’ve seen/heard a lot of overweight men insult women that are a similar composition to them. (People of both genders seem to get equally negative assumptions once they’re in the very overweight/obese category).

TonysCatchersMit · 2023-09-08T19:03:17+00:00

Speaking as a lesbian, it’s my experience that women care less about weight than men. To a point, anyway. As you go up in weight fewer people will find you attractive but I think for women it takes much more weight/more obvious morbid obesity to be completely turned off.

I’m fit now but at my heaviest I was 5’3” and near 200 lbs when I met my wife who is very traditionally pretty. I had no problem getting dates either. I carried it pretty well (was “chubby” looking), dressed well for my body, had an attractive career and was personable and confident.

I also know that if my wife put on weight I wouldn’t get turned off until it got into very obvious “circle shaped” territory.

leafy_willow_2005 · 2023-09-08T19:24:49+00:00

I like it when a guy is husky and cuddly 😌

DreaminInChocolate · 2023-09-08T19:27:37+00:00

I think a woman's weight is more likely compared to a guy's height.

AnyIntroduction3288 · 2023-09-09T04:55:16+00:00

Yes! Yes women are much much much more lenient about weight than men are.

https://www.instagram.com/nabela/

For the record, I find this lady somewhat fat but not landwhale territory. I think she’s chunky but she does the best she can with what she has and dolls herself up quite nicely.

What does the incel community of APD say about her? They call her all sorts of nasty names, like landwhale, etc.

This is a stark reality for women.

Here are examples of women who are overweight that I find attractive. Men here will reject them with gusto:

https://instagram.com/emilylaukim

https://instagram.com/hcoxofficial

https://instagram.com/mrs_emontano

https://instagram.com/aayushibadheka

All of these people are influencers

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puppycatlaserbeam · 2023-09-08T19:46:54+00:00

Another reason for this leniency is how it can align to a broad preference for the masculine to be bigger than the smaller feminine. This often comes up in talks about women's strong height preference but another way for a woman to feel smaller relative to her partner is weight.

Lovers691 · 2023-09-08T20:30:55+00:00

Weight does matter to women, but an ugly fit guy is less attractive than an out of shape handsome guy

redkoicarp · 2023-09-08T20:32:47+00:00

Maybe, I am definitely more lenient with that, too. It's not like ideal or anything but this isn't a deal breaker by any means when there are other things I find attractive. I can't really say why, though.

Ok_Smile_60 · 2023-09-08T20:38:54+00:00

Definitely, but they still have standards on it

AidsVictim · 2023-09-08T21:12:29+00:00

If a guy is popular/has high social value yes. Otherwise no.

SlowEffective8146 · 2023-09-08T21:29:50+00:00

Absolutely not. Men need lower bodyfat percent to be considered attractive (this is already accounting for women needing higher bodyfat in general), men need lower bodyfat relative to what's considered healthy for men.

Rogue5454 · 2023-09-08T21:45:34+00:00

Of course they are. Lol

escapadablur · 2023-09-08T22:39:52+00:00

I’d say overall women care less about weight. When it comes to judging looks, women care more about how attractive a man’s face is. Most women would prefer a guy with a 9 face and a 6 body than the inverse.

SoldierExcelsior · 2023-09-08T22:47:28+00:00

I think women look at the whole package..For example if your overweight with a nice smile good personality good income and stable they may over look the weight especially since most women have been with their dream guy and it didn't work out.

Men on the other hand need a certain level if attraction to even have sex I've tried with women I didn't find attractive I just couldn't perform,sexuality works so diffrent fir women helk they can not be attracted to a man one minute and see him from a different angle and now he's attractive..

I don't think women are more lenient about weight I think they just don't find it as unnatractive as men do,men tend to allready be bigger and weigh more than their women any way.

But if you look at the men most women consider attractive they tend to be fit.Jason Momoa,Idris Elba, the guy who played Wolverine,Tom Cruise Brad putt and then there's the skinny emo feminine guys in all the k-pop bands ..amAnd I see plenty of these young guys in sagging skinny jeans girls always give high ratings to.

And let's be honest men tend to do alot more for women and are more valuable to them than women are to men,besides aex what ate you really getting from a woman..thus her looks are going to have a higher importance.Now if Iprah wanted you and was going to buy you stuff take you on trips pay all your bills,buy your car, you might be willing to let her slide on looks.

Able-Imagination3695 · 2023-09-08T23:05:47+00:00

People out in the real world are more lenient with weight, period. Both male and female from my observation and personal experience.

For example they’d prefer a tall clearly overweight male over a short fit dude

Physical fitness is extremely important to some women and if you've ever stepped foot inside of a gym - which I feel like you probably haven't - you'd see there are tons of short fit guys with fit girlfriends. A woman who cares a lot about fitness isn't going to tolerate an overweight man, regardless of whether or not he's tall

or a wealthier fat guy over a broke fit dude;

This depends on the woman and her priorities. Some women would absolutely choose a wealthier fat guy over a broke fit dude, but others would never touch a fat guy with a 10 foot pole and would do the broke fit dude.

compared to men who universally tend to want a girl with healthy weight.

I think that universally is the wrong word. I think that most men want a woman that's *under* a healthy weight but will settle for healthy, but there's a very good part of the male population that is actively and vocal about liking thick/overweight/chubby women. Some even like them FAT fat.

Different women have different priorities, dealmakers and dealbreakers. For some, money is the end all be all. For others, health and fitness is the end all be all. I think for most, someone who can make them laugh, fuck them right and contribute to a decent lifestyle is the ticket.

Southern_Fall983 · 2023-09-09T00:38:46+00:00

No, they are not more lenient than men for virtually everything

Earth-lover93 · 2023-09-09T02:12:48+00:00

Fuck no,

womandatory · 2023-09-09T03:32:08+00:00

In my view, yes. I know loads of women in their 20s-60s who are in great shape with men who are absolutely not.

sexual_powerhouse · 2023-09-09T03:43:15+00:00

In a general sense? Yes, women won't be mean to you or judge you as harshly for being overweight (usually). Men are more openly mean about fat people, even if they are fat.

For sex and dating? No lol. There's a reason why the advice men get 95% of the time is "go to the gym".

Not to say women won't date fat guys, they just won't have a raw visceral attraction. A lot of men find fat women insanely hot.

I think a lot of people also confuse big overweight, manly men with your typical obese guy. The former is basically the equivalent to a woman who packs her fat into her boobs and ass. No one really cares when people are fat if they pack in the fat well.

Dstar538888 · 2023-09-09T04:35:53+00:00

No, I refuse to go out with a fat guy or an overly muscular guy… not my type…

ComfortableOk5003 · 2023-09-09T05:19:09+00:00

Didn’t they have a study recently that said even fat chicks don’t wanna date fat dudes

Title	Discussion: Are women more lenient with weight compared to men?
Author	uselessloner123
Upvotes	10
Comments	65
Date	September 8, 2023 5:38 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/16dgwpg/discussion_are_women_more_lenient_with_weight/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/discussion-are-women-more-lenient-with-weight.1231319 https://theredarchive.com/post/1231319

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