Attractive girls I’m see don’t seem to know how to have a conversation

Pain_Tough · 2022-06-29T17:44:54+00:00

Beauty is a tyranny that does not last -Socrates

Alternative_Being215 · 2022-06-29T20:19:14+00:00

I’ve noticed this with myself actually for my first few relationships. I’ve heard a great quote “a person can only get to know you as well as they know themselves” so if they don’t know much about themselves, then odds are they don’t know what questions to ask to get to know you. Or they ask about things that don’t really matter. This can definitely happen when people think looks are the only thing. So all in all, if they don’t ask questions, they most likely don’t have much depth to their personality

kathruins · 2022-06-29T18:38:09+00:00

yep. i struggle with this with men and women. the other day someone described their taco bell burrito to me for ten minutes. that same person wonders why im so mysterious. they dont let me talk about anything but the random shit in their heads!! there's no thoughtfulness or pointed discussions. i do find this is way less common with people who are a couple decades older.

MistyMaisel · 2022-06-29T15:51:11+00:00

If you've never been treated as genuinely interesting outside of people wanting to sleep with you, you never learn to treat others as genuinely interesting outside of wanting to sleep with them.

Really attractive women don't know how to converse because no one has ever really conversed with them in a way that didn't feel like it had an agenda.

PuroPincheGains · 2022-06-29T15:48:18+00:00

[permanently deleted]

tonyferguson2021 · 2022-06-29T20:06:25+00:00

You are the common denominator here. It’s better to be interested than ‘interesting.’ A truly feminine woman is more in receptiveness than giving. Don’t ever expect or ask a woman to give you anything.

People need time to open up, try not to judge them by your own standards as that’s a form of projection

Robofrogg1 · 2022-06-29T17:37:41+00:00

If they’re not asking questions about you, then they’re just not that into you.

Traditional_Map_9206 · 2022-06-29T21:37:46+00:00

Why put a girl on a pedestal she is only human maybe she has social anxiety or is super shy and struggling with her sexuality or things at home which can make it hard she also might not have many friends which she feels she can trust

Also you should read the book/story 1001 nights

peacheeblush · 2022-06-29T15:21:18+00:00

Why would you enter a relationship with someone like that?

Overall I think it’s pretty well known that people who are lacking looks wise need to make up for it in other areas. I have experienced that as well, unfortunately.

lokipoki30 · 2022-06-29T16:40:37+00:00

It could mean she is just not that into you ,

I have noticed it too and assumed that , it’s why I think there is no use having women as friends . They are for the most part incredibly boring and don’t really much value apart from having sex with them

Or maybe they are very interesting with bright personalities but only showcase that to Chad 🤷

SnooHesitations4922 · 2022-06-29T15:30:27+00:00

Alot of attractive women are social morons. Many don't got "game" or refined social skills because they simply never needed them so they never developed them, or they devolved as the internet evolved. I personally prefer social morons because they tend to not judge me for also being one, but that's just for hookups, for I relationship I would definitely want a normal girl that can communicate.

Proveyes · 2022-06-29T15:24:54+00:00

Sadly, yes.

From my point of view, it's a question of incentives, depending on social and cultural factors. In the western cultures, it's expected from the man to take on the active role while the woman is expected to take on the passive one. In addition, the more attractive you are, the more people will approach you, take the initiative and show interest (>active). So you are less likely to develop this kind of social skills, because you are not confronted with the problems to reach people, people coming to you "naturally".

I don't say it's impossible to find a proactive attractive girl, it's just statistically lower, because they don't have social and cultural environmental incentives and received more social validations.

Therocksays2020 · 2022-06-29T15:46:35+00:00

This is where you can set a value for yourself. If I message a woman on an app and she gives a lazy answer in the first 2-3 messages I leave them on read. Sometimes I get a double text.

Some have an expectation that you will “entertain them”

AngeloMacon · 2022-06-29T19:56:14+00:00

Can't be certain for a quick post, but if this is trend you're noticing, it's probably not a social IQ issue and more of a narcissism issue. Hot chicks who'd be on a dating app or at the club is where i'm guessing you're pulling these gals?

jjboy91 · 2022-06-29T22:01:48+00:00

They live in easy mode thanks to simps

WiseMan_Rook22 · 2022-06-29T23:08:43+00:00

Like I always say. Being good at conversation doesn’t mean I have to carry it. She gotta put in some effort

GordonGecko69 · 2022-06-29T23:15:50+00:00

Negative. She just ain’t interested in talking to your boring ass. If you hit the right locker combination your problem will be shutting her up not making her talk. Conversation is a dance and right now it looks like you have two left feet.

GotThaAcid5tab · 2022-06-30T00:21:22+00:00

Dating apps/insta/influencers etc have bought out very narcissistic traits in people, the way I see it.

theurgeoftheflesh · 2022-06-30T03:05:39+00:00

Ugly girls give the best head anyway, speaking from experience

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2022-06-29T20:59:29+00:00

How about instead of grilling them with millions of questions like it's a job interview, make statements about them and let them refute. You look like someone who hates seafood. You can be interesting by making up interesting statements and showing off how your mind works. You learn more about a person's personality from strange extraordinary circumstances than you ever could going down a laundry list of questions.

If you were a famous celebrity who's been grilled for decades what would pique your interest if you were being interviewed for the umpteenth time? Someone who makes the interview fun and entertaining. But do not neglect the innuendo (you're trying to interject attraction, not be an entertainer/interviewer).

Fit-Ear-3449 · 2022-06-30T02:03:29+00:00

Not true I’m attractive and I really do know how to have a great conversation about many different topics too! It’s just the girls you may be choosing.

celestial-kitty2 · 2022-06-29T23:14:28+00:00

Maybe they aren’t into you. I’m dry as hell when I want someone to go away but not sense rejection and kill me/attack me

FordSpeedWagon · 2022-06-29T15:37:59+00:00

I've noticed this as well and find it annoying. My experience on dating apps is matching with women and then they just can't hold a conversation OR they just don't have a personality.

It's a bad time to date imo. However I am horribly bored so I keep trying lol.

2022-06-29T18:05:53+00:00

That’s a really interesting point you make about social media and the fact that they’ve never really had to try and give anything in their relationships. I actually agree tbh, some of the really hot girls have essentially been raised in cotton wool and haven’t been living in the real world. Kinda sucks tbh

Kiltmanenator · 2022-06-29T18:58:22+00:00

They're just not that into you and/or they figure they don't need conversation to keep your attention, and they'd kinda be right based on the framing here: you put them on the pedestal as the more attractive, it feels.

Lucky-Boat5361 · 2022-06-29T19:16:50+00:00

Welcome to looks aren’t everything

2022-06-29T22:36:36+00:00

Same reason they are not funny - they don’t have to be to get male attention.

2022-06-29T23:06:53+00:00

Some don’t talk much and some aren’t that smart. There are a lot of hot girls who know what to say and like me they’re experts at being the best people. They’re some kind of perfect. I’m perfect too

Krouser1522 · 2022-06-29T23:11:06+00:00

I just find in general younger generations have more trouble communicating in person in general. A lot of the ones I meet that are my younger cousins age as well as my wife’s younger brother are on their phones most the time and have trouble just having normal conversations

seanfergusonlf · 2022-06-29T23:25:25+00:00

It's called hautism, and it's not exclusive to women.

koolex · 2022-06-29T23:38:03+00:00

I think you're just dating bimbos. Being attractive is enough for short term but don't get into a LTR with someone who doesn't meet your standards and clearly a standard you have is that they are curious about you. Some people aren't curious about anything and they aren't a good fit for you.

I've dated girls who were interesting and ones who weren't, you just gotta be pickier with who you get into a LTR with.

thatshinobiboiii · 2022-06-30T00:03:24+00:00

Most people’s favorite person and topic is themselves and they either don’t care or don’t feel comfortable inquiring about others. It’s particularly bad with certain attractive people who feed off attention

Eastern_Ad5817 · 2022-06-30T00:07:20+00:00

There could be a variety of reasons for this. I'm also a fan of those "Questions to ask to get closer to someone". It's pretty cute to pull it up on both of your phones and ask the questions that pop up. Helps you both get comfortable getting more emotionally intimate.

Are you dating young women? They may be pretty inexperienced or just not so comfortable opening up. People of varying levels of attractiveness have varying levels of social skills.

SpinCity07 · 2022-06-30T00:13:14+00:00

You can get by with looks. They trick you into believing your interesting. Then when you don’t have them, you suddenly need social skills.

Off2damoon · 2022-06-30T00:35:57+00:00

Not sure what this is worth but I've been with some objectively attractive women (dancer instructor, actress, and currently dating a very hot blonde lab researcher). I would say they were all between 8-9/10.

Believe it or not, they all had very charming and caring type personalities. Their looks were not substitutes for their character but rather complimentary to it. What's the common thread here - These women all worked in professions that demand character. You can't be an instructor if you're a bland, dead-pan bar of soap. You can't be a researcher if you don't have analytic thought skills.

Is there an inherit correlation between physical attractiveness and a degraded personality? I don't believe so. Instead, I think the correlation you're seeing is from the women who utilize social media as their means to an end. These shallow creatures live near-purposeless lives, relying on emotional spikes from online validation. This behavior pattern is similar to that of a drug addict.

Maybe a better question is.. Are all attractive women online validation seekers? In my experience, fortunately, the answer is no.

The other important question here is what is your objective with these hot, bland women you're talking to? Are you trying to get in their panties and struggling with the conversation? The chit chat bullshit is almost irrelevant as what's more important is physical escalation, and making the conversation about you and her together. If you're turning her on and talking about future projections with her and shit like that then any women is going to latch on to your words and listen as though your her new daddy and she's ready to learn from you. It's hard wired into their DNA.

If you're trying to build a LTR after you've already been banging her for weeks and YOU find HER to be too boring/ self-centered / careless/ etc. Then congratulations because you've learned quickly that she is a shitty partner and not worth your time. Trying to pair bond with a girl simply based on looks is a fools errand. With brain dead hotties, get your nut and get out. For a relationship the woman has to have a good personality or you'll be on a one way ticket to hell.

MakeItGain · 2022-06-30T00:41:02+00:00

Women are quite shy when you initially talk to them although they are very good at not showing it. I think a lot of guys do better with approaching than they think.

If you've been dating for a while or in a relationship and they don't ask any questions about you, I wouldn't consider that head over heels, that's really odd.

Most women can talk. Put them in a room together and they talk..

Aceleeon · 2022-06-30T01:13:29+00:00

Well it boils down to: control, what you can and can’t.

Can’t control: a pretty girls Depth of comedy , depth of “interesting” things.

Women are sometimes painfully boring and not funny. Fr. But you can’t make them funny they have to want to be it or be interested in “interesting” things. They have to want to talk.

Can control: Your ability to make “boring” people talk about things via being interested in ‘girl stuff’. Like: musical theater (Aka humans expressing via dance and song = emotions = mating season). Domination and submissive stories in any streaming show ever ( Aka bad boy daddy man leads woman into seductive situations against her prIncess like ways = classic control = mating season) I’m guessing from These kinds of issues you’ve listed (I’ve trained men on how to date btw so I’m not taking a swing at you) that you prolly talk too much. Don’t give them enough time to breathe or even let the air just sit. Coupled with a lack of knowing what girls like in general to get her emotionally charged over a longer period of conversation.

The_GOAT27 · 2022-06-30T01:22:57+00:00

I actually have this with my flatmate. She's a very attractive young girl (21) I'm 28 but I feel the conversations are mostly one sided. I know a lot of things about her but she has no clue about my life. My honest thoughts was, is that she just doesn't know how to spark inner feelings. She's a lovely girl but it's hard with her. Been living with her for about a month now and Yesterday was the first time we actually hung out, just the two of us. we went up the mountain and done a night skii. Most of the time it was me who had to start the conversation and get the ball rolling. Knowing from my good mate that was seeing her sister, she does find it pretty hard to make connections with men. Ive never met the guy but She was seeing someone awhile back and found him quite bland but I don't think it was him, perhaps it is her. Perhaps these attractive women expect a lot from guys to do a lot for them and not the other way round. They just seem so up tight on focusing on themselves then actually having proper connections with other people.

This is just my opinion anyways

Radicalmattitude1 · 2022-06-30T01:51:00+00:00

2 things: 1 - hot girls aren’t pressured to have personalities so they often don’t develop them. 2 - she is more I love with the “concept” of you than actually who you are. Same thing would happen to me when I sang in a band - girls would want to bang after the show but didn’t give a fuck about my actual personality because they already made up their mind about who I was as a person. (Not that I’m complaining, but that’s what it is)

Nervous-Bench8090 · 2022-06-30T02:40:34+00:00

I'm higher on the attractive scale, and I don't like to open up or get attached quickly because most guys don't take me serious or assume I'm slutting around town. I know I need to work on it, and this will definitely make me think about it more!

robml · 2022-06-30T02:49:39+00:00

You have 3 choices: beautifully hot, intelligently funny, sexually exhilarating. Now choose two xD.

Edit: usually applies for guys and girls but hey if you get lucky you might meet someone with all 3 + is good with the family.

Title	Attractive girls I’m see don’t seem to know how to have a conversation
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	129
Comments	91
Date	June 29, 2022 2:56 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vnhqa3/attractive_girls_im_see_dont_seem_to_know_how_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/attractive-girls-im-see-dont-seem-to-know-how-to.1255725 https://theredarchive.com/post/1255725

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