Is it easier to move on when you know your ex is dating again?

bleazyDG · 2024-12-28T00:24:09+00:00

If you want to believe it so much, then believe it and get over it. You said you would be in a much better place if you knew. So yeah sure she banging, now ya know.

CommunicationNext936 · 2024-12-27T18:26:12+00:00

Hey first of all get out of this idea that she is in somebody else is bed think it this ways somebody else is in her bed like the way you were . Second don’t fight get another chick bro there is two billion women in the world .

ThrowawaySunnyLane · 2024-12-27T16:41:20+00:00

Just because she swore on your son’s life she wasn’t dating anyone at the time, doesn’t mean it’s still true now. Also her interpretation of “dating” could be different to yours. It fits for her to twist the narrative. Also, what does swearing on your son’s life actually mean? It’s just words.

Easier said than done but just move on. It’s done. If she isn’t dating now, she will be at some point. Be there for your kid(s).

Spooky3264 · 2024-12-27T14:23:06+00:00

Hopefully OP reads this. I had clues about my then wife, getting with other men. She's a sneaky harlot, so I never had concrete evidence. Late nights out, not answering her phone, being sneaky with her phone when she's around me. The divorce was finalized in June. I spent months in a depressed state, thinking about her, missing the illusion of a perfect relationship that we had, etc. Then, right before Christmas, my step daughter gave me the crushing news; my wife was having an affair from 2021-2023. And that she was getting clapped out by random men for the past several months. That shit hurt, but I feel like it mentally set me free. Done with that bitch and I'm ready to find my person.

Point being, I should have just realized that she already monkey branched before the marriage was over. I shouldn't have dwelled on it for months. Just move on! Grey rock her and focus on yourself

Suspicious_Dot6179 · 2024-12-27T11:40:10+00:00

Oh hell bro your shrink is stupid. I was trying to prove it for months, and she just would not admit it. I begged her so that I could move on. And the second I found out there was someone else, I did move on. It sucked for the first couple days MAX then the future looked good again. She owes it to you.

Allen5275 · 2024-12-27T07:35:02+00:00

You don’t wanna know. It will probably destroy you. Work on yourself, no contact if you can. The less you know, the easier it is for yourself tbh. I was honestly moved on and ok with the divorce, until I learned about the other man, which turned my life upside down. This is something that would destroy men.

hazalo9 · 2024-12-27T03:44:04+00:00

It gets harder. I'll save you some time on this. Get used to not having her in your life. Grey Rock or No Contact until you get to the point you don't care anymore. I was stuck for a year in that pain until I came across this sub, went No Contact and doing great now! Get to the point where you don't care what she does as soon as possible so you can continue a happy life. Good Luck Bro!

probebeta · 2024-12-27T03:12:04+00:00

It's unlikely for women to not have something lined up and secure before they divorce. So most likely there is another penis involved. This stuff gets men angry and upset, so I don't understand why you'd really want know about it. Just accept that she's gone and look towards the future. Once both of you start sleeping with other people it's over and will not be the same anymore. So that should be your clue that it's time to move on.

Two_ents · 2024-12-27T02:34:44+00:00

Knowing doesn't make it easier, in fact it has made it so much more difficult for me to move on. It's in my nature and built into my profession to look into things. I've learned quite a bit about this dude, which I suggest you try not to do should you find out she is dating.

You will undermine your own sanity and your self worth will plummet. Good luck brother.

PghSubie · 2024-12-26T22:47:44+00:00

It's not a competition. Take care of yourself first. Feel good about yourself, THEN work to find someone worthy of your time& attention

Docautrisim2 · 2024-12-26T22:23:41+00:00

Not for me. It was easier to move on once two conditions were met. 1) I knew that I’d be ok without her. 2) when I nothing her. I don’t care if she wins the lottery, I don’t care if she dies in a car crash. She’s a blip on the radar of my life. Nothing more, nothing less.

atomicnugget202 · 2024-12-26T20:04:54+00:00

Partially, but it was a serious gut punch, and I still battle with it today. But whether you want a divorce or not. Don't delay the inevitable. It just makes the healing that much harder.

If she's done she's done. You've could've done right by her, done a little wrong, or been a complete arse hat but when she's done she's done. No convincing, 180 changes, time & space will fix that.

DuckIcy6297 · 2024-12-26T18:08:17+00:00

who cares. focus on your path.

or do you want us to tell you that shes having sex with the best lover shes ever had in the world. she always finishes and shes never been so satisfied.

if you take a few minutes you can recognize how all of that doesnt matter.

you will, and others will find reasons to hold onto the pain of what could have been. you have to accept the suck and move on. The only short cut in grieving and moving forward is to start today. there isnt a potion. there isnt a jordan peterson quote.

There is starting a journey, feeling all the feelings and having dialogues about things infront of you that are real. not ideas in your head that you might just be rationalizing as real to stay in that sad spot.

CharlesDanceFan · 2024-12-26T16:56:35+00:00

Mate if you think this is bad then wait until you find the butt plugs and sex toys.

That will test your resolve lol

This is what they do mate. It’s like some in built mechanism that they get more depraved with the new chad.

Accept it and move on. You’re too busy working on yourself than to devote any energy to this trash

One4All992 · 2024-12-26T16:56:27+00:00

I think it's easier to forget about them. Everyone's situation is different though. I can't stress this enough though, the SOONER you just focus on yourself and the child the better life gets.

From time to time she'll pop in my head, but it's not in a, I miss her type of way, it's a I'm grateful I'm not with her anymore. You don't see it now, but I promise as the days, weeks, and months go by it gets a lot better.

redragtop99 · 2024-12-26T16:44:15+00:00

You just can’t think about what she’s doing. I know it’s hard and it takes time but you’ll get there. It should be zero concern of yours what some woman does w her dating life, and that’s all she is to you know.

Royal-Reporter6664 · 2024-12-26T16:14:21+00:00

I know it's hard , the best thing is to ignore it , the best reaction is no reaction.

pmbrenner91 · 2024-12-26T15:03:42+00:00

best way to get over someone is to get under someone

drtij_dzienz · 2024-12-26T14:19:53+00:00

She may weaponize the details as needed. Like if you are pushing her to try couples counseling, she can describe what she does with others as a way to tell you it’s very over.

Pro-IDGAF · 2024-12-26T14:15:29+00:00

you have to stop wondering what they are doing. it makes zero difference and it prevents you from moving on.

i know alot of guys didnt want the D and might have been blindsided and i understand that makes it harder

if you’re in that category, maybe try thinking about how to make yourself happy now, that doesnt involve her.

ExaminationKlutzy194 · 2024-12-26T13:45:01+00:00

I don’t know. I just found my wife on Ashley Madison and I have to wonder how long she’s actually been there.

Several-Eagle4141 · 2024-12-26T13:44:09+00:00

leaving4me · 2024-12-26T13:42:35+00:00

My ex was a cheater. I tried to work through it to save the marriage. I eventually pulled the plug. None of the other people made it easier to move on. Realizing I needed to prioritize myself over a relationship with someone who didn't care about or respect that relationship or me is what allowed me to move on.

So with that, what's going on doesn't matter my brother......she didn't choose you.

RealMadridfan369 · 2024-12-26T13:40:07+00:00

Oh 100%, the wife asked for a divorce and in the same week bought the plane tickets to bring her boyfriend to spend the week. You'll move on. It might not be next month or year, but you'll wake up one day and won't even think about her.

l3tsR0LL · 2024-12-26T13:21:41+00:00

Yes. She started dating before we broke up. Knowing that she had already moved on made it easier to accept and realize our marriage was over.

I use the phrase "she is someone else's problem now" frequently

Title	Is it easier to move on when you know your ex is dating again?
Author	bennyl23
Upvotes	9
Comments	29
Date	December 26, 2024 1:16 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1hmo4uj/is_it_easier_to_move_on_when_you_know_your_ex_is/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/is-it-easier-to-move-on-when-you-know-your-ex-is.1539548 https://theredarchive.com/post/1539548

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