Women have become the bane of my existence

Mexcol · 2025-03-26T23:43:52+00:00

For the love of God use paragraphs

throwawayofc1112 · 2025-03-26T23:08:57+00:00

Bro, the first step is to eliminate the narrative of “I just can’t get girls,” I struggled with the same mentality for many years, and I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 22. How often do you go out? And how often are you approaching?

BackroadTwistarama · 2025-03-27T03:10:03+00:00

My advice is to not take any advice from the dipshits on here. This place is full of morons and pretenders.

I’m an ugly dude who’s gotten plenty of action. For the most part if you genuinely just give a shit about who the woman is, and not just for her hot milky skin or whatever, you will begin to have more success. Make women feel seen, and they’ll want to keep spending time with you.

gtaIIIstan · 2025-03-26T23:46:38+00:00

Eh, just another common tale of a guy stuck in what I call a romantic default. I suspect this how you've always moved. What do I mean? Well, let's take the story you told. This was a woman who was giving you all the signs for several days. You did nothing. Then finally in the eleventh hour, rather than MAKING MOVES IN THE MOMENT, you defaulted to asking her out on a romantic date in some vague future. This is a party environment. You two live in different places. All that was required was finding a quiet place, maybe playing a drinking game, and when the vibe was on making a real move. Hell, if you were going upstairs for her, it should've been to hook up with her, not asking her on a tame coffee date lol. Seemingly, you have the looks. But the way you THINK and act is killing you. Women have many agendas when they date and have attraction towards a guy, and MANY of those agendas have nothing to do with a LTR contrary to what conventional wisdom says and most wrongly guys believe.

Also, a woman is far more likely to want to see you again -- for whatever purpose -- if there's actually physical investment involved. Then staying in touch and maybe (or maybe not) pursuing something makes sense. But not in your case when you did nothing for several days and then weirdly asked her out for coffee while she was up in her room. Anyway, fix this and you'll start to get results.

For more on what I mean by romantic default, PM and I'll send you my old post on the topic.

xexpharious · 2025-03-26T23:14:48+00:00

Maybe it’s just something about you that isn’t really hitting the mark, like you’re there but not quite. Most men have a hard time dissecting the smaller things but bottom line, just from what I can see, self loathing and 0 confidence. Confidence is beyond sexy and self loathing is like anti-female energy.

IamWisdom · 2025-03-27T02:43:14+00:00

Your game is horrible. You need to stop trying to be nice and start just being kind of a careless asshole but in an endearing way. Are you ever funny with guys and do you ever make ppl laugh? Treat women the same way and don't try to get them to like you. Challenge the shitboutbof them and make them qualify themselves to you. Flip the script. Have you read books and watched videos in game? I bet you haven't.

kneegrowmancer99 · 2025-03-27T08:17:38+00:00

It's clear that you're feeling a lot of frustration and pain, and it's commendable that you're seeking advice. However, focusing on personal growth and building self-confidence is crucial. Consider exploring new hobbies and social environments, as this can help shift your perspective and alleviate some pressure. Remember, every interaction is an opportunity to learn and grow, so try to approach each experience with an open mind and a willingness to engage without the immediate pressure of dating.

carooo1919 · 2025-03-27T23:55:09+00:00

hey i read that you’re a soldier, try to get stationed in Korea. I just spent a year teaching there and the military men there have a LOT of fun. i think it can help with your self esteem and also get you out of the house. plus there are lots of a beautiful women :) might be worth a try

Maximum-Cover- · 2025-03-26T23:49:20+00:00

As a woman reading along, for what it’s worth, here are my two cents…

I’d have turned down any man who gave me the vibe of describing me this way:

Recently I just met this smoking hot redhead with skin like milk from High school at my boy’s bachelor party and I she would give me all these enticing smiles and was very talkative with me.

If you’re describing me like this to other dudes, after getting to know me during a several days long vacation/trip, your reason for approaching me is just very very flimsy and shallow.

For a cold approach on the street, going off of this kind of thing might be okay because appearance is all you have to go on.

But a man who’s mindset is such that, after spending a few days we me, he’d describe the reasons for his attraction to me that way and he didn’t have anything else to say about me?

Yeah, no… hard pass.

Also, in my experience as a woman generally considered to be fairly attractive and who has several smoking hot friends…

The more attractive a girl is, the more she’s going to feel like that.

Smoking hot women have dudes hitting on them who are into them primarily for how they look all day, every day. I’m pushing 40 now and I still can’t go so much as grocery shopping without being cold approach at least once, most days, by dudes who have nothing with me in common besides that they find me attractive. When I was in my 20s it happened literally all the time.

I will never give a guy the time of day if he gives off the vibe that he’s as looks focused as you are coming across as here.

And if I would go for men who are primarily interested in me for how I look, I have the option to go with high earning professional men, and wouldn’t even consider men who are into me primarily because they think I’m attractive unless they had the same ‘level’ as I do when it comes to really shallow reasons to date someone… i.e. he’s either super hot himself, or earns at least 300k+.

klippklar · 2025-03-27T00:24:40+00:00

Do you have low confidence? Because that's the one quality that is attractive to most women and a dealbreaker when it's not there. Also it seems that you - rather than having a connection and sharing intimacy - just want to "get it over with" with a beautiful girl to feel better about yourself, which is repelling.

CharmingRejector · 2025-03-27T00:44:58+00:00

I can hear my dad yelling at me: "You're not supposed to figure them out. You're supposed to fuck them!"

IMHO, unless you're really, really good at the social game, simply stop asking women out. They don't want to be asked out. They want to be fucked by an exciting guy. So, instead learn to flirt, mercilessly, and learn how to bring her around the corner to make out with them. Only ask her out after you've fucked her.

Learn to approach. And then learn to get them hooked, and to get compliance.

If you get good at getting girls to be compliant and follow you around, then get good at escalation. Kiss them. Fuck them in bathrooms, etc.

Then keep on of them and make her your gf.

Only then are you allowed to ask her out.

stick_it_in_your_bum · 2025-03-27T01:23:51+00:00

Bro I can feel the anxiety and insecurity bleeding through the screen. Cut that shit out. Start by loving yourself, and building yourself up until you feel worthy of love. You cannot love someone else until you take the first step to love yourself.

pissshitfuckcuntcock · 2025-03-27T01:58:15+00:00

You’re reeking of desperation. Get some hobbies, and focus on them instead, because no shit Women run from you with that attitude and mindset.

Kylearean · 2025-03-27T01:07:46+00:00

Improve yourself first. Gym, dress, appearance, mind.

Conscious-Upstairs30 · 2025-03-27T01:19:06+00:00

[permanently deleted]

jjjjjjamesbaxter · 2025-03-27T03:53:56+00:00

Break that shi into 4 paragraphs bruh pls

Some-Yogurtcloset412 · 2025-03-27T05:29:49+00:00

you write like someone who hasn’t invested a lot of time in developing a more empathetic, caring and deep personality.

BurtBobain94 · 2025-03-27T06:33:04+00:00

Flirting is what I'm by far must uncomfortable and inexperienced with when it comes to seduction. I have an easier timer initiating touch then doing that.

FKaria · 2025-03-27T10:50:20+00:00

Read Models, by Mark Manson
Go out and build your confidence. Build a life you're proud of.

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2025-03-28T16:05:33+00:00

This is a really poor mindset. Women are not responsible for your happiness. Take accountability.

Wazzzock · 2025-03-27T00:01:52+00:00

YOU have to be the magnet not them, make a name for yourself, at least you're trying that beats 90% of other geezers. I can tell you're in a good head space, just got to keep trying, it took me 24 years

Every girl will break her own rules for the right man

liftingnstuff · 2025-03-27T03:30:57+00:00

Your problem is you lack agency. Wahhh I got rejected wahhh modern society and social media have changed the way dating works. Wahhhhh it's not fair I can't succeed.

Dating is a skill. To improve at any skill you have to apply structured practice, swallow your pride, and pursue uncomfortable but achievable microprogress. Break it down into smaller tasks. You're not going to get better at "getting women" in one swoop. You're going to get better at opening a conversation. Better at holding eye contact. Better at teasing. Better at telling stories. Better at physically escalating. Etc.

You have to be willing to fail, and be able to reflect on why you failed and how you can use that failure to get a little bit better. Go look up beginner's guides and embrace the process.

RockyLeal · 2025-03-27T00:08:45+00:00

It must be a pretty bleak existence if one can't find anything else going for themselves than being 'an army vet'.

Bro, go to art school, take cooking classes, learn photography, read philosophy and classic literature (not necessarily just classic, good 20th century literature is ok), learn about Architecture, maybe learn how to DJ... whatever, you get the point just stop being 'an army vet' for the love of god.

Normal-Rhubarb-9948 · 2025-03-27T02:11:44+00:00

You need to focus your life on something other than girls bro

Fun-Joke-3063 · 2025-03-26T23:07:12+00:00

You have to take them, if they start to say no then you stop but don't ask for permission once you've seen the signs and my boy you saw signs... grab em by the pussy.

Title	Women have become the bane of my existence
Author	BurtBobain94
Upvotes	43
Comments	120
Date	March 26, 2025 11:04 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1jkpg1d/women_have_become_the_bane_of_my_existence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/women-have-become-the-bane-of-my-existence.1547744 https://theredarchive.com/post/1547744

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