Got way more attractive -> Way harder to get girls online

seduction-ModTeam · 2025-07-24T12:49:13+00:00

This post/comment has been removed because it violates Rule #5: The topic is too broad, has been covered a lot already, or involves the assumption overly limited by race, age, physical limitations/appearance, and/or other inborn external qualities.

Put in some reading & work before asking questions that have been addressed, like: * How do I approach? * How do I get a number? * How do I talk to girls at college? * How/When do I kiss a girl? * Does this really work?

As for the last one, it is an answered question. There have been many posts on physical limitations over the years, including this one. No need to re-ask it.

LightsEnimeLE · 2025-07-23T13:06:05+00:00

hmm are you hitting up the same type of girls, or girls who are 3x more attractive than your previous ventures

Seiiiiiii · 2025-07-23T13:44:59+00:00

Maybe you look insanely douchey right now because of how you show off on the apps

Coolguy1699 · 2025-07-23T13:18:32+00:00

It's not you. It’s everybody. Girls' inboxes are getting flooded with simps, blue check marks and guys wanting to fly them out. The game has changed It's not 2015 anymore

DavidStamina · 2025-07-23T13:16:07+00:00

Show before after

bankrobberCaz · 2025-07-23T14:12:48+00:00

You’re on the first step of a journey that’s going to eventually lead you to the realization that using apps and social media to meet women is only going to lead to trauma and disappointment for you.

Based on this post and some of your others the brutal truth is that you’re chasing validation based on your insecurities. You have leveled up from an attractiveness standpoint, but your core belief, whether you know it or not, is that you’re unattractive and unlovable by women. This is something that can be worked on and fixed, but chasing these women who are addicted to the dopamine rush of getting thousands of likes and dms is going to backfire hard and reinforce your negative core beliefs in the long term. It’s already happening, as your expectations for the rewards of being more attractive have been shattered.

Here’s a reframe: “I’m working on myself and making myself more attractive because it makes me feel more confident, healthy, and accomplished. I don’t need external validation from female strangers, I’m good and if they don’t like me, then there’s the door.”

Aromatic-serve-4015 · 2025-07-23T13:40:25+00:00

maybe you got less available and less relatable so girls are intimidated

ThatDarnSmell · 2025-07-23T17:05:01+00:00

You're only 22. It should be the easiest time in your entire life to meet women. Put the internet on hold and spend some time outside. Walk around. Notice all the women? Good. Now go talk to them.

Csabeszpier · 2025-07-23T13:03:46+00:00

What face surgery did you get?

water_reducer · 2025-07-23T14:24:29+00:00

you fell for the rp meme that masculine is what girls all want. that's only true for scent, but visually speaking twinks, leanmaxxers, and pretty boys clean up. that's why guys like justin bieber, timothee chalamet and robert pattinson were lusted after by prime aged girls while ufc fighters and roid freaks are sought after more by single mothers and over the hill wine aunts and get glazed by other guys.

you might also think you're "jacked" but a lot of guys who think they are jacked put on a combo of muscle and fat and think they look better. you always want to keep your body fat low for pics.

muscles = sex is entirely a male gaze phenomenon. the problem with looking jacked and high masculine is that it makes you look low commitment and a walking pump and dumper. that's what men think is suppose to be attractive, but psychologically speaking women are the ones that get pregnant and are stuck with task of getting left behind with a kid so they are wired to watch out and avoid low commitment men. too many guys think "boyfriend material" is a bad thing, but it's only a bad thing if she thinks you're unattractive. A+ boyfriend material is going to outperform A+ alpha douchebag. the only exception to this is going to be via pheromones where working out increases sex hormones, thinking about purely on visual terms is where you end up in your situation.

UnkemptGoose339 · 2025-07-23T16:16:13+00:00

Use hinge and bumble. And get off the phone and go approach girls IRL as well. You're limiting yourself to only using Instagram.

bigblackdikk · 2025-07-23T18:24:52+00:00

First people complain about handsome guys getting 90% of chicks, now it’s the rich simps grabbing them all… interesting perspective

fr33dom35 · 2025-07-23T15:10:53+00:00

My boxing instructor is 6’6 shredded and models. his entire ig is narcissistic flexing. I really don’t think women like it. It’s too try hard, it’s trying to qualify to them, and trying super hard to look pretty comes off as feminine. I do daygame with him sometimes and tend to get way more interest despite getting height mogged by the guy and being kinda fat and all around non aesthetic. He’s in all designer I’m wearing shit I bought at Walmart that doesn’t even really fit. I think everyone’s just become desensitized to flexing on the internet though and it doesn’t score you as many points as it once did. She just sees how hard you’re trying and assumes you have a small penis or something. I have another friend who went from fat to skinny and jacked over the last 9 months and reported similar. I think there’s a threshold where obviously you’re too out of shape a lot of women are going to reject you for it but as long as you’re not obese other things matter way more and women can detect a “gymcel” who spends all day in the gym trying to be more attractive. Women clown on these guys a lot. If your ig signals that, it could be your problem

New_Banana3858 · 2025-07-23T15:45:17+00:00

maybe you've leveled up your ig to much
and people just can't relate to you anymore?

donmaghrebi · 2025-07-23T18:49:21+00:00

It's very simple but most people don't get this because their head is so far their insecure ass.

Women are people. (Surprise suprise! Even feminists don't get this one).

People have anxiety when they see attractive people of the opposite gender.

Anxiety is often associated with avoidance. And avoidance leads to less dates, hangouts and sex. But women have sexual needs and want attention, so who do they fuck? Mid to mid ugly dudes.

And women tend to be quite good at doing mental gymnastics to justify the lay. This doesn't prevent them from wishing they were with a hotter guy which is why in 10 years later, she'll demand he has to be 6ft tall, has 6 figures, etc... when she's looking to settle.

Keep in mind that since covid, everyone's been getting more mentally ill and anxious.

TLDR; Just be mid to mid ugly. Don't be too ugly or else you you may find it a tad bit harder to make male friends. If you're too attractive, you'll scare the women (50yr old + women will love you though), attract aggression from closeted dudes and guys won't let you meet their girlfriends (you need that to network).

Protip: Just shave your head, it's easily reversible and see the difference.

Cornichonsale · 2025-07-23T14:19:40+00:00

This is smv fallacy. Women dont want men that take more time than them to dress up or make-up. They have ridicoulous standard now so they wont put up with someone that can go F* themselve . They want the easy way out, the only kind of men they will iniate actively its a 6 figure provider to wipe clean their debt, or a beta for validation. Thats it.

celesteclementine · 2025-07-23T17:04:54+00:00

I am so proud of you nonetheless!

You are inspiring me to go on my journey too

Ok-Sky-4215 · 2025-07-23T18:41:56+00:00

The apps are throttling everyone's visible even the girls to get them to pay. The Apps were good mAybeeee back 2015 but now they make the algorithm. Apps isn't real life.

Strange-Building6304 · 2025-07-23T23:35:56+00:00

I'm in my late 30s, I have never had any luck online. When I was growing up, only weirdos who couldn't get laid pursued online relationships. Maybe that ideology has framed my thinking and has affected my online game but regardless, meeting people in person is the play. Go somewhere fun and just talk to everyone and have fun and you will get laid. I am medium ugly, 5'8 and not rich. You can get laid going to the grocery store. You just have to be interested in genuine connection.

BitsaLuvly · 2025-07-24T00:41:01+00:00

First, many congratulations!🥳 I am extremely happy for all of your physical progress.

Now, have you ever considered these women might now be intimidated and feel out of your league? Almost like you’re too good to be true if you look that good and need to be on a dating app for a long term relationship versus a one time deal.

If you have improved as much as you say you have then why be concerned with people online viewing photos of you rather than meeting people in person? Why not venture out to meet someone where you can apply all five senses…and possibly a sixth!

I feel like you are now 100% satisfied with what is visible to others, but possibly not so much confidence about what you may or may not know what is going on inside. You can alter anything you want on the outside, but until you alter the inside, the outcome will remain the same. I wish you well on being satisfied with yourself completely.

RandomBlokeFromMars · 2025-07-23T14:35:29+00:00

you THINK you are more attractive. if you were, it would be easier.

Healthy-Falcon1737 · 2025-07-23T19:21:35+00:00

Did your messages differ before from today?

KindPossession2583 · 2025-07-23T21:48:10+00:00

We need to see before and after to see if what you’re saying is true.

Matter_Still · 2025-07-24T01:29:21+00:00

Maybe they’re not picking up on your humility and-I’m-just-an-ordinary-guy-who-spends-summers-in-Ibiza vibe.

Seiiiiiii · 2025-07-24T04:08:38+00:00

Do you have any pictures of you smiling?

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2025-07-24T05:40:31+00:00

Who the fuck do hot girls on Tinder meet up with, then?!

smind893 · 2025-07-24T08:56:00+00:00

Yea sorry man but you sound like a total tool the way you describe your social media and yourself.

Some inner work may be the key

OJSimpsons · 2025-07-24T09:20:58+00:00

Perhaps your vanity is a turn off.

EducationalArmy9152 · 2025-07-24T09:38:51+00:00

You went on a bulk and now girls think you’re fat and your surgery looks like a bad taxidermy. There I said what I said

mootje___ · 2025-07-23T12:47:47+00:00

Focus on being masculine first. Maybe it can look better your face but also more femine. Maybe before the surgery u had a more masculine face then now. Woman want a guy they can feel safe around, and know if a fight happens they can protect their girl/wifes. Usually guys who does surgery to their faces are more leaning towards the femine side. It’s noticeable on the face if a guy did surgery. Grow a beard maybe, rock that tuff look hopefully from there it will get better

Life-Income2986 · 2025-07-23T12:46:33+00:00

I'm very sorry that people aren't following you back as much as you think they should on social media. I can't provide any advice since I'm not a weird social media sex pest, just wanted to commiserate.

PossibleAd8552 · 2025-07-24T01:43:21+00:00

Girls don’t like fuck boys

Title	Got way more attractive -> Way harder to get girls online
Author	RebornElim
Upvotes	215
Comments	101
Date	July 23, 2025 12:39 PM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1m785ps/got_way_more_attractive_way_harder_to_get_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/got-way-more-attractive-way-harder-to-get-girls.1557850 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557850

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