Lifting helps but not much.
I have been trying to find meaning in my life for a while. And I have come to realize that there isn't any. That life is purposeless. No matter what I do, no matter what I achieve my actions and my achievements are meaningless. Whether I become a saint, series killer, or amass wealth greater than Jeff Bezoz my achievements and my legacy will be forgotten along with 7 billion people just like me.
I have come to feel that even my existence is meaningless. For life I am a mere meat-sack carrying my genes. My whole existence in the grand scheme of things feels like human equivalent to what microbe is to a whale.
I know I am not a special snowflake. I have grown out of the thought that I am center of the universe, and the notion of absolute good and bad, and everything exists for a purpose.
How do guys find meaning, purpose and truth in a reality so void of it? How do stay sane in a universe that just IS?
This post is not supposed to be a pity party. These are reoccurring thoughts I have been having that I am not able come to peace with.