Separation, and a smack to the face

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September 14, 2019

As some of you might have seen from my previous posts, my wife has a boyfriend and we are currently separated, but living in the same house.

We have separated the financials. Nothing has been filed for separation or divorce, I believe she thinks at this point I will take her back if things go south with this guy who is a LDR(2 days drive).

I continue to stay lifting, reading, following my MAP and STFU because as you all say the stay plan is the go plan.

When this all went down her sister suggested we stay in the house till spring for the stability of our three kids (6,11,13).

I have been living like this with her talking to him all day and night in front of the kids etc since the end of July. As time has progressed she ignores the kids most of the time she is home to talk with him. She also recently got in trouble at work for her phone being in her face so much.

I feel like it’s my ego here, but I really want to just move on. My two oldest kids want out of the house with her also. The longer I let this go on, the longer I feel like I’m just letting her postpone the inevitable. The guy is such a nice guy doormat, that I don’t think it’ll last, but I don’t want to be stuck with her if their relationship falls apart and she’s all messed up from it.

So my question is, do I stay in this bs till spring, or do I just lay it down and say the house needs to be sold so everyone can move on. If she tries to say no, do I say you already made the biggest choice of this relationship, you made the choice that you wanted out. You don’t get to make the choice of how and when everyone else gets to move on with their lives.

She also keeps saying lets be friends after for the kids. I feel like I should treat this like any LJBF and say no we can’t be friends after this is done.

I guess I’m seeking advice from you all, since none of you hesitate to smack me in the face to wake me up to the reality I’m in.

Post Information
Title Separation, and a smack to the face
Author aita2899
Upvotes 14
Comments 101
Date 14 September 2019 09:47 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
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[–]simbarlionRed Beret52 points53 points  (9 children) | Copy

I'd be amazed if anyone says anything other than GTFO.

Toxic shit like this can be so hard to see when you are on the inside, but fuck man, you are in a prison of shit and you have to GTFO.

So, I repeat, GTFO - as soon as possible.

[–]dwebsterlight3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, the stay plan/go plan is for non-cuck low drama situations.

Be cordial but don’t be friends afterwards. She is just trying to keep her options open with you by the sound of it, just in case her branch swinging doesn’t work out.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

But...but...her sister said he should wait until spring.

Edit: I don't want to be a mod, but I would like to be in charge of user flair. I'm thinking TeleCuck would fit here.

[–]aita2899[S] 2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

I think so too. Starting to wake up to this shitshow going on around me.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are clearly too weak for all this. I’ve seen this play out literally dozens of times with guys like you. I already know the ending. Let me know if you want a spoiler

Hit the sidebar. We don’t provide instant fixes. You have to do the work.

[–]An_Actual_Politician7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Upside - download all her call logs to show a judge how she has been ignoring the kids. Might be helpful come custody time if it ends up being disputed (spoiler: it always ends up being disputed).

[–]RedPillGlasses14 points15 points  (3 children) | Copy

I can assure you, from experience, that judges don’t care about minor shit like that.

[–]An_Actual_Politician3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Crazy how proof of women prioritizing their new man over their own kids doesn't register in fa.ily court.

Luckily there aren't a ton of statistics that prove that the biggest threat to little kids is mom's new boyfriend./s

[–]RedPillGlasses1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

If there aren’t a ton of statistics, why are you implying it’s true? I’m stepdad to three kids, doesn’t mean I’m going to go beat one of them to death.

[–]An_Actual_Politician1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You missed my sarcasm. There's a bu ch of research and statistics that show one of the biggest dangers to kids is moms boyfriend.

That said, of course it doesn't apply to all step dads. Not even close.

[–]bowhunter85747 points48 points  (0 children) | Copy

“My wife has a boyfriend” just read that over and over until it really sinks in

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points  (8 children) | Copy

You think the kids seeing daddy as a cuck and mommy as a whore is good for them? Lawyer up and divorce asap. If you weren't a faggot I would say go fuck some strange.

[–]part_wolf11 points12 points  (5 children) | Copy

Banging random chicks is not a good look when you’re going for custody. Best approach leading up to a divorce is to keep one’s dick in their pants until the process is over and done. This guy is going to need to use that time to improve himself anyway.

[–]Cam_Winston21[🍰] 8 points9 points  (4 children) | Copy

Crazy that we live in a society where what you say is true, which means that a brazenly cheating whore is still likely get favorable custody chances but the man has to keep it in his pants just to possibly increase his odds of not getting divorce raped.

[–]part_wolf4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

It’s a shame, but it’s the world we live in.

I doubt this guy realizes it, but playing nice and keeping the peace while gathering evidence of her being a brazenly cheating whore is actually a solid approach. He’s going to be in a much better position to dictate the terms of the divorce if he ever actually takes command of his situation.

[–]aita2899[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

So far that has been how it has went as we moved forward. We didn’t involve lawyers due to costs, but with the uptick in stupid shit the past few weeks I went to a lawyer and started the ball rolling filling the paperwork myself so it looked like no lawyers were Involved.

I’ve bent a few times to her requests, (the staying in the house till spring)but I really have taken the stance that she made the single biggest decision of our marriage when choosing to cheat and branch swing.

I just was looking for a smack upside my head, that it’s really time to stop being nice and trying to work it out amongst ourselves. It allows her to prolong this whole ordeal and dictate the pace it moves at. Once my kids told me they were sick of her shit, I guess it really was the push that I needed.

I was putting up with it so it would be as normal as possible till we figured it all out.

I wanted to hear others thoughts and experience so I could make an informed decision on how to move forward and not fuck myself. I trust my lawyer, but it’s also in their best interest to drag it out so they make more. Guess I’m trying to find a balance between both.

[–]part_wolf0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

She stopped being your wife a long time ago. Your ex-wife has given you an opportunity to have a fresh start and become the man you’re capable of being. That’s more than most men get. You owe it to yourself and your kids to take command of the situation.

All of the of advice that’s already been posted here about your best path forward is sound. If you do it right, you have a good chance of not getting completely fucked in the divorce proceedings. The best mindset for now is to err on the side of action rather than taking a passive approach; otherwise the situation will only get worse from here. Each day of inaction on your part will make it worse for the kids and carries great risk of your wife figuring out a way to fuck you over in the divorce.

Smile, play nice, keep your dick in your pants, gather evidence, and talk to your lawyer about how to get out with as much as you can as fast as you can. Take it from someone who was in your situation; you can rebuild yourself and your life.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Strange men still counts, right?

[–]part_wolf1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I just blew bubbles in my coffee reading this.

[–]_nivla28 points29 points  (4 children) | Copy

Don’t kid yourself, you’re the doormat.

Be a man. How are you able to let her impact you and your kids in this way?

File and move out. Arrange for equal time with the kids or for 100% custody.

[–]Redpillbrigade179 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

“Lay down rules for her”? How is he going to enforce them?

[–]aita2899[S] 6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Can’t move out in my state. I give up custody and claim to the house. But the rest I agree with.

[–]Rifleshoot6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes, don’t move out. Moving out is seen as you surrendering the house to her in the court system. Lawyer up and get it over with. Your marriage is over, and your wife is screwing another guy.

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

How about filing right now? You are just bullshitting everybody with your excuses. Wife is whore? You shoulda filed first day.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think the crowd has covered this one well, but one thing I might add: get set up in a new place (in same school district) and make it kid-friendly. Your two oldest are probably old enough that the judge will consider their opinions on where they want to live. If they really want to be with you, show you're a good dad who puts his kids first, and get your kids ready to tell the judge they want to live with you (and why).

[–]part_wolf7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Why are you wasting our time? You’re still lying to yourself. There’s been no smack to the face, and absolutely nothing has changed since you posted 29 days ago about her sexting with this new guy. Wake up brother.

Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to continue being a major pussy. You’ll enjoy the sloppy seconds when your wife comes crawling back to you after Chad gets tired of her and her baggage (which is you), and your marriage will limp along for a while until your wife gets bored and finds another guy because she knows you won’t do shit about it. Your kids will never respect you again.

See you in another month with your next post titled, “things are getting worse, what should I do?”

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Redpillbrigade1714 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy

File for divorce ASAP.

See a lawyer.

You’re at risk that she gets primary physical custody, including right to move with the kids out of state. You become the far-away, visiting dad then.

If the house is jointly owned you can’t do shit. She can stay there as long as she wants including invite the boyfriend to live there, to intimidate you and make you move out.

Buckle up for the long war. Your plan should be to make her move out, leave kids behind.

Get yourself a clear support system for the kids that does not depend on her. Go to all their events, doctor appointments, be the model dad.

When filing for divorce ask court for primary physical custody. She can come visit from out of state or wherever every week or whatever. But you stay in the house. Do not move out until you have a custody order agreeable to you that’s signed by a judgeI ,if you care about your kids and your time with them.

And yes you’re the nice guy. Time to man up and tell the co-pilot turned terrorist to get their parachute and jump out. You’re flying now and will land the plane with the passengers (your kids) wherever and however you want. She’s done. Her doing calls like that with the guy and your kids too, in your own fucking house, is a huge no no, and a sign of what she’s capable of.

Good luck. Stop being a pussy.

[–]jacksarmy4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the right way to fight it, go for full custody being the primary caregiver, get the kids up,dressed,fed and bring them to school, make all the dinners, bring them to any activities/birthday parties etc. You are responsible for everything. Could even work better if you lost your job and become a stay at home parent. You might get $$$$$ out if it.

[–]tspitsatgp12 points13 points  (6 children) | Copy

Dude there is no relationship, sell the house and move on. She doesn’t need to agree to shit, she’s made her choice.

GTFO and read the sidebar. Start with NNMNG because the shit you are tolerating now is fucked up on so many levels that I struggle to think you have read anything and if you have you have internalized nothing.

Brother, move on.

[–]aita2899[S] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

I did read it, but I guess I was in denial thinking the kids would be damaged. They told me yesterday that they are sick of her shit also.(the two oldest). Thanks

[–]Iammrp25 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

It will hurt the kids but the damage is already done. I've seen affairs without divorce hurt kids so it's not just the living apart it's the breakdown of the family that hurts kids. Your wife has already done the damage. Move on.

[–]Chump_No_More1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Your wife has already done the damage.

The OP has also done damage to these kids by giving them a front row seat to his shit show of having no self respect and the resulting inability to protect them.

The OP is living in a fantasy if he believes his prior actions have been to keep his kids safe. Their universe is shattered, not safe, and he has an equal share in that collateral damage.

His kids will be in therapy for years.

[–]Iammrp21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Absolutely. There's a lot OP isn't sharing. Either to protect his ego or because he is ignorant of his own failings. Talking to you /u/aita2899

[–]RedPillGlasses0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You’re being overly dramatic.

Children’s universes are shattered when their parents are drug addicts, prostitutes and pedophiles.

His kids are in a (relatively) amicable separated household, where they’ve realized that Dad is the better parent, and they would prefer to live with him after the divorce.

He will get divorced, sell the house, and then get 50/50 or full time custody of his kids.

It’s actually a pretty good situation, and far from “children in therapy for years”.

[–]Chump_No_More0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You may have some personal experience but don't think you've seen it all. My experience vastly differs as I have dealt with young kids growing into adulthood and, regardless of amicability, divorce fucks with kid's heads. At some point, therapy is in their future... it's only a matter of when.

For the record, I don't believe in "staying in it for the kids"... a man with children must have and enforce boundaries, if not for himself, then to teach his children by example how to stay whole and afloat in a sea of conflicting agendas. This is the most important gift that only a man can give to his children, as a woman does not have the tools.

I agree that at least one 'sane' parent, acting as the lighthouse in the tempest, is imperative... one is infinitely better than none, been there - done that... but believing there's such a thing as a 'good' divorce in which children will emerge from it unscathed is a dangerous fantasy.

[–]IRunYourRiver3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This isn't good for the kids either. They are more intuitive than you give them credit for. Move on. Make the transition into the next phase of your life. Don't use them as an excuse for inertia. (Edit - redpillbrigade is changing my mind on this, but I'll leave this comment up - good luck, brother)

[–]themerovingian015 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know how you could still care about a woman who has another man balls deep on the regular.

[–]Praexology5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

As everyone else has said, GTFO especially if she is actively cheating on you.

That said, GTFO doesn't necessarily mean vacate the house. Make sure you arent giving up rights to your property or kids. Push for a finalization of the marriage and of how to split the house. Once your finances are divorced from eachother then physically gtfo.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Holy fuck dude. I get that you're putting your kids first, and that's noble...but at the cost of your dignity and self respect.

Her sister suggested you should stay in the house with this cheating whore? Who the fuck is she to suggest anything about how you should live your life, or what's best for YOUR children?

Other than yourself, the only person whose opinions should matter to you is your attorney... You do have one, right?... Or were you just planning to let your wife's sister dictate that you should leave the house, the kids and all your assets with your "wife" and give her 90% of your income?

Grow a fucking set of balls already!!

[–]redrulesusa3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are living with your wife while she’s fucking some other guy and he’s the doormat? You are showing your kids that you are less than a man by staying there and putting up with that shit. Go pay the top divorce attorney in your town yesterday and do every single thing they tell you. My first guess they will tell you to stop being a cuck.

[–]adeptintact2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You have to take the lead in this situation instead of being a doormat. After I separated from my ex-wife, I filed divorce and initiated mediation talks. I also told her we were selling the house, which we sold a few months later.

You are being indecisive because you don't want to let go of your old life. Don't use your kids as an excuse to be a cuckold. It's time for you to man up and move on.

[–]_nivla6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

What are you going to do about it?

You know she’s with another man. This occurred while you are married to her. That’s cheating. You have proof? Recorded calls, trip/hotel receipts, anything? I don’t know how any state would punish you for moving out or on custody if you bring solid evidence.

Have you spoken to an attorney? If not that’s your next step-like now! My $20 bet, you let a week pass and don’t talk get one retained, you plan on staying with her.

[–]aita2899[S] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

I have and everything is set to go, just wanted to make sure I was handling this correctly before I have her served.

[–]RedPillGlasses5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Get the house sold no matter what. Filing for divorce is probably the best way to initiate that.

I moved out with my kids from their drunk ass mom. She stayed in the marital home for THREE YEARS, and didn’t make one mortgage payment.

Guess what I could legally do (in NH)?

Not a goddamn thing. She wouldn’t agree to sell it, refinance it, wouldn’t agree to anything.

My credit went down to a 492, but foreclosure just ended, so in 2-3 more years MIGHT be able to buy another house.

Sell that house no matter what.

[–]Redpillbrigade173 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yikes. They don’t tell you any of that in wedding magazines do they. Mine wasn’t as bad but I definitely learned few things the hard way. I see young newly weds without prenups now like sheep to the slaughterhouse. Just clueless.

[–]DoctorMoneyStacks-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

prenups are worthless

[–]lololasaurus3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

Talk to an attorney so that you don't accidentally hurt yourself legally, and if he gives you the all clear, move out and take your kids. Good grief that is toxic.

[–]aita2899[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

He gave me the ok to file on her.

[–]justpickanyusernameRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

So do we. Ball’s in your court brother.

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]RedPill-BlackLotusRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

If your hamster starts to get the better of you, do some cardio man.

Keep pushing forward.

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy

In my time here at MRP I may have told one or two faggots they should seriously consider leaving ASAP. I'm a huge proponent of OYS first, then figure out their relationships.

First time I've said you need to get the fuck out before that.

[–]nordicpolarbear4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed but he needs to file for divorce immediately and stay in the house until all the legal issues are settled so he can get optimum custody outcome. In the meantime I would act like she doesn’t even exist other than for logistical issues. She is dead to me now I am just running my house and taking care of my kids.

[–]Redpillbrigade173 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

No. Only if he doesn’t care about time with kids. See my replies. Been there done that. Move out mentally and move on. But currently his best bet is to buckle up, live with the enemy for a while, while he gets what he wants in custodial time. Signed by a judge, not promises or emails.

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

You misunderstood. He should consider getting out ASAP, and get his ducks in a row including lawyers to do so.

OP shouldn't even consider that his stay plan is the go plan mentally. He should be on go plan.

[–]Redpillbrigade172 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well to be clear get out from relationship but not physically get out from house. Courts view that negatively as giving up parental responsibilities as a father.

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

He doesn't even know what stay-go means, he throws it in every now and then to act as if he's not a cuckold.

[–]RedPillGlasses2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good job brigade, Upvote

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

Dude, accelerate the go plan. Move on. This sounds bad for everyone but your wife.

First, see a lawyer. Maybe this whole boyfriend and always on the phone thing is something you can use but need to document.

And wtf would you be friends with her? Be friendly in front of the kids, be professional and businesslike when dealing with her about issues with the kids. It sucks when the kids has to see parents fight and the parents sabotage eachother instead of making shit run smoothly.

[–]aita2899[S] 3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

My state is a no fault state. So unless she’s a junkie prostitute that beats her kids nothing changes even if she’s having orgies every day lol. Thanks for the wake up

[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Ok. Is she neglecting the kids to be on the phone, leaving to be with him, what she says to him in front of them?

[–]RedPillGlasses6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Aita is right. In no fault states, she has to be physically beating the kids for anything to happen

[–]khalabrakis1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Sounds like she's fucking off at work and neglecting the kids because of her fantasy. That's surely a sign of instability for the kids' future well-being.

[–]RedPillGlasses0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

No, it’s not. Don’t comment if you haven’t been through it.

[–]khalabrakis1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Sure I've been through it. I've had a mother like that. Lost custody. Don't comment on if my shit is bonafide if you don't know me.

[–]RedPillGlasses0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Dude that was 30+ years ago, it’s totally different now.

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If she loses her job, won't he be stuck with higher alimony?

[–]screechhaterRed Beret4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

perhaps you should consider telling her to get the fuck out

I think what shocks me most, is you allowed her sister's advice to dictate your future

Tell her to get the fuck out

Get some cameras and record her bullshit with ignoring the children she carried

[–]RedPillGlasses2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn, you guys watch way too many TV shows. Judges don’t care how long you talk on the phone.

Everything else you said is good.

[–]apietroski85 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It sounds like you are the one waiting around for her to break up with her bf. Your entire post and all your comments are just excuses. Go see a lawyer. Go find a new place to live. Lift, find hobbies, be the best dad you can be, go hang out with friends. Forget about any type of relationship with your wife besides coparenting.

It is going to suck, you may get screwed in the seperation, your wife may come begging back to you, but you need to move forward with this.

Your kids will enjoy a happy Dad who is owning his shit more than a doormat who is living in fear and denial.

[–]Redpillbrigade176 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

No. If he moves out he risks losing seeing his kids big time. His moving out is not inline with his kids “enjoy a happy Dad”. If court order limits his time seeing them, and she gets significant primary physical custody he will become the absent dad and relationship with kids will suffer materially.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

Go back and talk to a lawyer about the situation - you have done this right?

My state is funny with moving out of the house (not a dealbreaker but can hurt your). My plan is we ever separate to immediately sell the house and then we can get temporary custody’s arrangements, temp orders for support, etc.

I suggest you go that route. Who is on the mortgage and deed? Both of you or just her? Could she make the payments without your share? If the answer is no then you sell it and she doesn’t really get a say in it. Alternatively she can buy you out and refinance. But a lawyer is 100% needed right now.

[–]aita2899[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I could afford it on my own, but it would be tight. She can not afford it even though she makes more than me. Her mil lives with us and eats up about 400$ a month in bills that once this house is sold, she will completely take responsibility for as the MIL isn’t helping me with the kids in her eyes then.

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Mil? Can you make sure we don't get an more relevant information?? It would be helpful, and we sure don't want that!

BTW, what meds are you currently on?

[–]aita2899[S] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Mortgage on my name because her credit is shit, and the deed/title is in both our names

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

So she can buy you out or you sell it. See a lawyer though. Seriously. You need to get out ASAP without hurting yourself legally.

[–]aita2899[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I do, I just wanted make sure I’m handling this right before I start to file

[–]WesternhagenWinner2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

When this all went down her sister suggested

Dude, WTF? You are listening to advice from a manifestly biased source? You are in your sister's frame as well as your wife's?

She also keeps saying lets be friends after for the kids

You are going to have to communicate and cooperate for the benefit of the kids. It is best if you do so without confrontation. Is this what she means by "being friends"? Probably not. What she means is she wants to demote you to orbiter - you will be her dogsbody, handyman, and on-demand babysitter. Fuck that, don't do that.

See a lawyer. Get ready to play hardball, because you're going to have to do that to prevent her from moving the kids to where her LDR lives.

[–]SailorAground1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why haven't you gotten a lawyer? You are entering into dangerous waters without having legal counsel to help you. You are NOT legally separated and need to get the paperwork squared away before you do anything else. Stop telegraphing your moves and telling her what you're going to do and just do it. You're about to go to war with this bitch and need to be prepared for it. Since you seem incapable of figuring shit out for yourself, here's the plan you should execute:

  1. Go here:
  2. Find a lawyer.
  3. Hire said lawyer.
  4. Get your legal plan in place.
  5. Take care of your legal responsibilities to your STBX.
  6. Kick the bitch to the curb as quickly as possible.
  7. Stop being such a cringy faggot and man the fuck up.

Spez: Forgot to add: Why the fuck are you talking about your feelings to this bitch? She does NOT respect you or otherwise she would not have cheated on you. She doesn't give a fuck and will use these conversations as a means to manipulate you into getting her way, i.e. fucking you over. You and her are no longer friends, lovers, nor spouses but are now sworn enemies and you need to see it that way or else the horrors you're about to experience in the coming divorce will destroy you.

[–]Two_kids_in_a_coat4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

You fucking dumbass divorce now. If you do it while she’s head of heals for this dumbass then she’s not gonna think about how much she hates you in the divorce and you can keep much more of your shit. You wait till it’s over and she wants you back then she’s gonna be pissed that you don’t want her. She’s gonna get a big money divorce lawyer and fuck You over hard. Seen this a million times.

And yes to the LJBF until after the divorce. Let her think it’s all ok. Then as little content as possible once it’s all settled

[–]RedPillGlasses2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

He should agree to LJBF, and then fuck the sister

[–]peaceandlug1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

And, the mom.

[–]Captain_pants43 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don’t let anymore time pass...pull the plug. Grab your balls and never again think about how you’re going to justify something to someone.

Even if 2 of your kids want to move away with mommy don’t let them. Kids are fucking stupid and have no idea about what’s good for them. They’ll come around eventually so make sure that you’re always in their lives and that they can feel your love.

By the way, your wife’s dream is going to become a lot less appealing when she finds out that she can’t move that far away from you when there are minor children involved

[–]Glennus6262 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

How do you not have a lawyer and divorce proceedings? Hey look kids, dad is a cuck doormat.

You do you, but staying in the same house and paying for her lifestyle while she fucks another guy while still being married to you and in front of your kids? What a laughing stock you are.

[–]aita2899[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I have a lawyer. We were trying to do it without big lawyers bills, but after the past few weeks and how she’s been acting I don’t want to put up with it anymore.

I’m just making sure I have things setup properly before I set this all in motion. Ducks in a row right?

[–]RedPillGlasses1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like your tactic of consulting a lawyer for advice, but doing all paperwork yourself.

Good divorce lawyers wants a $10k retainer, and divorce lawyers WILL bounce shit back and forth between each other to run up your tab.

[–]crimson_chris0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

WTF is going on here. The fact that you dtart this post with "My wife has a boyfriend" tells me all I need to know.

Get divorced, don't get divorced. Stay and be a cuck or leave - does not matter. You don't seem to get it. MRP is about you. What is your purpose? What are your goals? I have been gone from MRP for a while and I can't believe the fagtastic cuddling you have gotten on this post.

Do whatever you want because it does not matter. Your wife and the strange cock she is swallowing is not the problem. The problem is you. Until you figure that shit out, you can't be helped.

[–]JameisBong1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Aww stay for the poor kids and share your lovely wife... sarcasm of course,you should be looking at apartments for yourself ASAP.I found one as soon as she cheated,paid the rent for the month and left as soon as she had her usual blow ups(She had BPD).

[–]HappyChaos21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"If she tries to say no, do I say you already made the biggest choice of this relationship, you made the choice that you wanted out. You don’t get to make the choice of how and when everyone else gets to move on with their lives."

This stood out the most to me, get out of her frame, you don't have to justify. GTFO.

[–]redwall921 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude ... you actually know that your wife got in trouble at work for being on the phone too much. How did you find this out?

Why are you still spending your valuable time, your precious time listening to this woman make mouth noises?

I believe that you still NEED this woman. Your have such a scarcity mindset that you are holding on to the only thing you FEEL like you have - this woman.

You need to work on finding an abundance mindset. You are living your life afraid to lose something (that you've already lost). You want to get to a place where you're living your life in a way that you are getting what you want to get out of life.

Move on, bro. And for God's sake ... don't ask your kids what you should do. Man up and do.

[–]Tbonesupreme1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

File for divorce FIRST.

Get a custody agreement SECOND.


You need to talk with a lawyer and see what your exposure is financially, and what you could lose regarding assets and custody.

[–]Tbonesupreme0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

File for divorce FIRST.

Get a custody agreement SECOND.


You need to talk with a lawyer and see what your exposure is financially, and what you could lose regarding assets and custody.

In the meantime, figure out why this woman has ZERO fear of you.

[–]Tbonesupreme0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

File for divorce FIRST.

Get a custody agreement SECOND.


You need to talk with a lawyer and see what your exposure is financially, and what you could lose regarding assets and custody.

In the meantime, figure out why this woman has ZERO fear of you.

[–]redditguy610 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Who's bitch dis is?

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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