Where should one go to get relationship advice?

crumblesnatch · 2018-01-16T16:49:13+00:00

Depends on what kind of relationship you want.

I wanted to get married and have a partner for life... so I took my advice from older people who have been married for 20-30+ years. My parents, aunts/uncles, family friends, professors I was close to and remain in contact with, mentors both professionally/personally. I've been lucky to have a lot of influence from older people in my life. Not enough people have much older friends. They gave me explicit advice from time to time, but also just modelling their behaviour is really helpful in my marriage.

truedemocracy3 · 2018-01-16T17:42:34+00:00

Honest answer are either friends or relatives OF YOUR SAME GENDER who have demonstrated success (a woman with a high value husband, boyfriend. A guy who has dated high value women).

Very rarely does cross gender advice work. What women privately want and publicly say they want are two very different things, men at least don't suffer from this hypocrisy (but men very rarely will give a woman hard talk advice)

MoodyAres · 2018-01-16T15:50:18+00:00

Experience. Reflection.

Mr_Smoogs · 2018-01-16T15:55:23+00:00

The problem I have with relationship advice is that women are eager to give it and it's almost universally hilariously bad. We had a thread the other week about how I was unethical in my previous sexual encounters because I acted too romantic and "boyfriendly."

In previous causal encounters with women, I would take them out on a romantic date and do "boyfriendly" things before hooking up. Somehow it is an injustice to "lead them on" by romancing them and then going our separate ways afterwards.

In other words, I should have treated my hookups as mere sex objects (as if seduction isn't inherently romantic?). Paradoxically, I wasn't misogynistic enough for their liking. It would have been more ethical to them if I had merely used them as sex objects.

Anywhere when men can speak freely and anonymously is where one should go. It's why TRP is so unique and ever-growing. Stop asking deer for advice on the best way to hunt them. Ask experienced hunters instead.

Princeso_Bubblegum · 2018-01-16T16:17:27+00:00

Experience is the best teacher.

blackedoutfast · 2018-01-16T16:57:10+00:00

Alright, now pay attention:

First of all, you never let on how much you like a girl. Oh, Debbie. Hi.

Two, you always call the shots. Kiss me. You won't regret it.

Now three, act like wherever you are, that's the place to be. Isn't this great?

Four, when ordering food, you find out what she wants, then order for the both of ya. It's a classy move. Now, the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice.

And five, and this is the most important. When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.

noheaking · 2018-01-16T20:37:30+00:00

From someone who has a relationship you want to emulate.

haunting-you · 2018-01-16T15:48:12+00:00

throughout the years... as a teen, i read a lot in magazines, and sometimes talked things over with friends. early to mid-twenties, would research online instead, trying several different sources and viewpoints (while still occasionally talking it over with friends). now, mostly just do online research and use my own sense/experience to figure it out if something comes up that i'm not sure of on my own.

ultimately, a combo of reading several different sources and viewpoints on a matter combined with my own knowledge and experience was really the best way. doesn't mean i didn't still make mistakes; of course, i did. but it was the best way forward. i can't relate to needing someone to dictate my every move, or modeling my whole life around someone else's; at some point, think for yourself.

wtknight · 2018-01-16T15:53:07+00:00

I've never gone anywhere for advice. I just follow my instincts and learn from experience. There are too many other people who have lived or are living completely different experiences from me for advice to be particularly helpful if it were ever given to me.

Eastuss · 2018-01-16T15:56:42+00:00

Family? no. Women? no. Older experienced women? Still not even aware.

I would go to men on internet who have had it bad but eventually made it. So, basically some TRP/PP users who do not care saying what has to be said.

passepar2t · 2018-01-16T15:48:33+00:00

The sidebar.

WhiskersNT · 2018-01-16T15:57:49+00:00

Male friend or relative who is self aware and good with women

RockinSocksII · 2018-01-16T15:58:33+00:00

People I know. Random people on the internet are not going to know your flaws and weaknesses.

MercedesBenzoAMG · 2018-01-16T17:21:39+00:00

As a man, ask your bros.

[deleted] · 2018-01-16T20:12:09+00:00

Your cool uncle

xtsv · 2018-01-16T20:56:51+00:00

Become friends with an ugly man that manages to hook up on the regular and ask him for advice.

Do not listen to women or extremely good looking men.

Entropy-7 · 2018-01-16T21:27:11+00:00

Black Dragon is the best I have read.

DarkLord0chinChin · 2018-01-16T15:55:17+00:00

Relationship advice is useless, if you are attractive you do not need it, if you aren't nothing can help

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JustAnotherOmegaMale · 2018-01-16T16:15:18+00:00

Friends and family. They know me and what I'm like. Asking for advice from anonymous strangers is idiotic.

TheBookOfSeil · 2018-01-16T17:25:52+00:00

I would either go to everyone or no one. Or both.

Why? People will tell you what they think or believe, and all of it fits together because it's all based on their subjective experience, like a giant puzzle, so you can try to put the pieces together to form the most coherent picture, OR you can gain knowledge yourself through experience with others and also observing people and questioning yourself to find the reason as why the outcome was the way it was.

The latter is more introspective than the former, but the former might prove to be more practical.

tplg · 2018-01-16T21:49:30+00:00

I mostly learned from watching my parent's marriage, along with some stuff from RPW (3ish years ago don't know if it's still good), and RPWi. I implemented what works for me and fine tuned it to fit my personality and environment through trial and error, and disregarded the parts that don't appeal to me.

If I'd ever need more advice I'd turn to people who are in a happy, long marriage (preferably at least a decade or two).

crackrocksteady7 · 2018-01-16T22:12:39+00:00

Players you know

If you don't know any go fix that

rainisthelife · 2018-01-16T22:58:34+00:00

There are multiple places you can get advice from, depending on what your goal for dating is. But I’ve found that men give the worst advice. I was just interacting with a guy here who was talking about how women shouldn’t make a guy wait for sex, and that making a guy wait for sex is just “feminist bullshit”. Considering that feminists are actually the ones that are more likely to tell women to have sex on the first date if they feel like it, I think he just wanted an excuse to give bad advice to women and take a shot at feminists in the process.

To be able to snag a good quality man for a relationship or commitment, women should refrain from listening to guys about their “preferences”. Because the male dating strategy is most likely going to lead you to casual sex-ville. No bueno.

Aristox · 2018-01-17T01:16:10+00:00

/r/relationships, /r/sex, /r/seduction are probably good shouts

AlanHalworth · 2018-01-17T01:43:18+00:00

There is no such thing as absolutely good or bad advice. I once received dating advice from a female friend. Said advice was terrible from a RP perspective. The advice did not result in my dating the girl I wanted to date. However I ended up marrying the same girl some years later, which would not have happened had I not followed the terrible advice from the other female friend.

rpwthrowaway2016 · 2018-01-17T02:51:57+00:00

I'm not married yet, but want to be. So, older women in successful marriages. Mainly my boyfriend's relatives or RPWives. And learning what not to do from my parents' own marriage.

washington_breadstix · 2018-01-17T04:02:12+00:00

Anyone who is living or has lived the type of life that you desire with respect to dating.

ReluctantSlimeball · 2018-01-17T04:58:04+00:00

PUA/trp will do wonders to get you in a position where women want relationships with you. But not so much after that barring a few trp truths.

Whisper · 2018-01-17T10:06:32+00:00

Nowhere.

No group in this culture can be relied upon to give good relationship advice.

Unabummer80 · 2018-01-17T13:20:02+00:00

Id get input from several different people and read about it, then evaluate it against my own feelings and experience and decide for myself

Willow-girl · 2018-01-17T13:43:51+00:00

1) Find someone who is happily married/partnered and follow their advice, or 2) Find someone who is miserably partnered, and do the exact opposite of whatever they recommend.

ANTIFA_SARKEESIAN · 2018-01-17T18:26:33+00:00

literally anywhere else but reddit

squidracer · 2018-01-16T19:50:51+00:00

No one. Improve on yourself. The rest will take care of itself

Title	Where should one go to get relationship advice?
Author	a_mans_perspective
Upvotes	6
Comments	99
Date	January 16, 2018 3:43 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7qt4cg/where_should_one_go_to_get_relationship_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/where-should-one-go-to-get-relationship-advice.263992 https://theredarchive.com/post/263992

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