Men concerned with women's motivation for sex display unattractive feminine behavior.

Scarabstone · 2020-06-10T18:37:41+00:00

-Saying that you are very sensitive to masculinity..so you can sneak your view of what masculinity is.

Defining masculinity as being (insinuated by a few post below) naive, aloof susceptible to preying women.

This is the best case scenario for women. What i mean is; When something they want, also has a 'Moral Cover'. Basically, OP (and presumably all women) Dont want men knowing or 'figuring out' what they (really) want (or think)in any type of way..So they frame this as "aloof masculinity".

I can and do understand that it is attractive to women, As they can be self conscious when around ppl who are always '2nd guessing' etc But that guy is susceptible.

Yes their are more charitable interpretations of OP's stance, but u know..u gotta start from the ground floor. :)

paint-the-world-red · 2020-06-10T23:23:43+00:00

This is the fifth time I’ve seen this little trick being used this week. The reframing of masculinity to make traits such as inquisitiveness and caution feminine while propping up naïveté and blind faith as masculine. Don’t get me wrong, I respect the technique but I peep it, as well. This is the best possible scenario for a woman, a man who has the wool over his eyes and cotton in his ears is easy prey.

TheBookOfSeil · 2020-06-10T17:54:32+00:00

At some indeterminate point in the past men seemed to be concerned with being manly and accomplished for women, and no fucks given about abs, Chads, dicks, or why women have sex.

Probably because they didn't have to. They were free to explore themselves and find their inner manliness without having to hear women critiquing them at every step of the way, and they still had wives to go home to. Now that the "shackles" have come off from millennia of being enslaved by men, women are still selecting like they were all of those millennia ago, so men can no longer be comfortable in exploring their manliness because now they have women saying a variety of things like "you're not being manly enough/you have to be this manly if you want me," and the piece de resistance, "Stop being manly because it's bad for women." Women have begun to redefine manliness into what they think it should be and are unsatisfied with the results, then attempt to blame men as though it's our fault for choosing to care what women wanted at all.

and my husband's complete disregard for my inner world seems pretty masculine to me.

What more can I say? Women that have a problem with men today have essentially created their own problems at this point and it's too late to turn back.

The popcorn has been out for so long that it's gotten stale.

Ordinate1 · 2020-06-10T17:47:44+00:00

After two women sabotaged birth control to get pregnant by me without my consent, you had better fucking believe that I am "concerned" with a woman's motivation to have sex!

"Is she looking for a good time or does she want to ruin my life just for kicks?" is an unfortunately important question.

cuckspace · 2020-06-10T23:32:15+00:00

Why do so many women think being an ignorant brute is the paragon of masculinity? Men have always sought out knowledge and understanding, both for it’s own sake and to be able to survive in the world and better it’s conditions. Is it because they deep down know men are not going to like it once they know and understand their inner workings?

Smoogs2 · 2020-06-10T17:50:45+00:00

Per your OP you would have to argue that it's "unattractive" if you suspect she is sleeping with you to baby-trap you into a relationship or to murder you in your sleep. To which I say, okay? Who cares what you think is unattractive, I'm not trying to bang you. I have had girls hit on me overseas and after I read about all those girls who drug you and rob you, it certainly gave me concern. I don't really care what /u/philomexa thinks is attractive if I am trying to avoid being drugged or jumped by this girl's friends.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2004/dec/19/ukcrime.prisonsandprobation

According to one expert, drug-assisted robbery is now a much bigger problem than drug-assisted rape. The mother of two, from Bow in east London, cruised top nightclubs and hotel bars to find her victims. Hakki, who could face life imprisonment when she is sentenced next month, is believed to be the first woman to be found guilty of using Rohypnol to drug men in Britain.

According to Graham Rhodes of the Roofie Foundation, an organisation set up in 1997 to help victims of drug-assisted rape and campaign for increased sentencing, there may be as many as 2,000 cases of drug-assisted robbery each year compared to about 900 incidents of drug-assisted rape.

Can you imagine my OP that said "being concerned about date-rape is unattractive." I am pretty sure the mods would remove it - even though drug-assisted robberies happens more commonly to men than date-rape does to women. That is besides the point though.

A less extreme example would be that it is "unattractive" to be concerned that a girl is sleeping with you purely for your monetary wealth in an attempt to extract it and/or baby-trap you.

https://nypost.com/2017/05/27/hamptons-bachelors-are-getting-vasectomies-so-golddiggers-cant-trap-them/

So lets move beyond your opinion and talk about if this concern is generally unattractive. Are these bachelors in the Hamptons unattractive for getting vasectomies so golddiggers can't baby trap them? I would argue no, because there is no reason to disclose this information, nor could a woman tell. I don't think this concern for intent has some inherent cause for a lower SMV. Why would it necessarily decrease these men's SMV? I don't see how it could.

SeemedGood · 2020-06-10T19:52:55+00:00

At some indeterminate point in the past men seemed to be concerned with being manly and accomplished for women, and no [visible] fucks given about abs, Chads, dicks, or why women have sex.

Men have always been very concerned with why women have sex. We have to be in order to form ourselves into what women desire sexually. The difference is that prior to the very modern era, women had no view into men’s discourse amongst themselves. You weren’t privy to our locker rooms, dormitories, or even golf clubs and thus you weren’t privy to our collective discussions about women.

Everything that you’ve seen in TRP is age old wisdom men have shared with each other for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. The difference is that now many more people are exposed to it because it’s in the public domain.

Mimoxs · 2020-06-10T17:53:01+00:00

he just presumes I'm game, that his dick is the best, and that's it.

As also a female, if I got that vibe I would run, not walk, out the door and not look back. That sounds repulsive. It might just be your attraction type.

Men should not only be concerned with why, but be grateful, and it should show.

redditthrowaway1478 · 2020-06-10T21:00:30+00:00

First off - what are you looking for with this post? Like, really? Us to convince you that our concern with the risky aspects of female nature is actually sexually attractive? If that’s the case, you’re either disingenuous, believe in asinine nonsense, or most likely off the mark just a bit.

Convince me that men worrying about being the hottest, or worried about what women are thinking is not actually unattractive feminine behavior.

I’ll take a stab at it. Let me ask you this -

Why do you view masculinity and femininity as something so binary? Everyone, men and women have masculine and feminine sides. Men tend to lean more masculine, and women, feminine; but we all already access these two sides of the spectrum every day.

It’s because of my feminine side that I care for a nurture my partners emotional needs.
It’s because of my feminine side that I want to stick around after my children are born and raise them to kick ass in the world.
It’s because of my feminine side that I forgive and show kindness.
It’s because of my feminine side that I show humility and modesty in my interactions with women.
It’s because if my feminine side that I not only protect and provide - but also deeply ingrain myself with my family.

Sexually, perhaps no. But tell me these are things that women are not emotionally attracted to in a partner?

Why should I care about being the hottest? It’s not about being the “hottest” per se, but about winning the competition of whatever is most desired. The women I wanted to sleep with liked dudes with 6 pack abs. If I wanted those women, I had to figure out how to attract them - thus, I got a six pack.

It sounds like what you find unattractive is not the concern, but the outspoken whining about it.

psypD · 2020-06-10T22:47:23+00:00

The thing is that a lot of those things are quite strongly trained in young men today. We are told quite specifically that we need to care about what the woman feels and needs.

"...or whether I'm reeeaallly into it at the moment, he just presumes I'm game, that his dick is the best, and that's it... "

This kind of shit is what gets you in trouble in 2020. In this case it is your husband but outside of marriage this is risky and young men are strongly discouraged from this kind of behavior. Have you seen any of the sexual conduct and sexual violence awareness training materials that are these days mandatory for most colleges and high schools. Affirmative consent and caring about what she wants are very popular themes in today's pop culture. Even in marriage this is still a concern since marital rape is a thing.

Outside of legal concerns there is also quite a large cultural pressure on men to have good sexual performance. The media is flooded with thousands of ways to make you feel sexually inadequate unless you do something or other or buy some shit. Do you think that so many guys are born concerned about their dick size, their ED , their PE ,their ZYZ. Pretty much everywhere the culture is based on creating and enforcing male sexual insecurities .

wizard_down_there · 2020-06-11T09:48:08+00:00

Just grab her by the pussy is this CMV summarised in one sentence.

Nuff said

ZestycloseAardvark2 · 2020-06-11T10:20:12+00:00

So according to you men should know absolutely nothing about females and just get burned. Gotcha

Appomattoxx · 2020-06-10T19:55:50+00:00

my husband's complete disregard for my inner world seems pretty masculine to me.

Just post this on r/XXChromosomes and get back to us.

GennyX · 2020-06-10T18:16:43+00:00

I don’t think it’s always a feminine trait, and I don’t mind femininity in men.

I think it’s nice to be asked after a particularly good session, ‘what brought this on?’ Because it shows an interest in what I like.

thelastjeka · 2020-06-10T18:37:58+00:00

I think you’re right. I think men like what you’ve described are an extreme turn off and I never even give them much of an afterthought. I do think men want to be the best in your life as far as sex goes and if they are I gladly say so( I’ve told my bf several times).

Zippo-Cat · 2020-06-10T18:38:29+00:00

No shit that men who can "effortlessly" get sex will not care where it comes from.

He wants to fuck, he fucks; he's not crippled by the ghosts of dicks past or whether I'm reeeaallly into it at the moment, he just presumes I'm game, that his dick is the best, and that's it.

Oh my, how toxic. Have you sued him for rape yet?

gaylord_fag_4 · 2020-06-11T00:01:48+00:00

Okay, I really like this post. But I guess its not feminine behavior because everyone has an inner world so it seems like ignoring your partners really just means you aren't that close. Sure, its masculine to behave that way but you still never want to know what your partner is thinking? Very anti telepathy if you ask me. A lot of things that people associate with telepathy females do because females are better at it at this stage of evolution. If you don't like when guys do it you either need to A. stop being so straight, or B. stop getting intimidated that males are catching up to us.

Pola_Lita · 2020-06-10T18:40:27+00:00

At one time, the pretense was that women didn't lust so therefore the only reasons they would be sexually willing involved how good a life a man could provide for them in return. But more and more, women are in a position to not only insist that yes, they do lust, but unfortunately it's not over the majority of men in the state that they currently present.

I think a lot of men are only indirectly concerned with the why of it. They simply want to change the situation to one where they're getting laid.

Am I the only one who understood you to be talking about appeal? Aren't you talking about appeal?

I love this, even though your first response is a complaint for his own benefit and somehow all the other responses are about being trapped by women or women cheating or women thinking they do no wrong:

This is not an excuse to:

complain about online dating
complain about hypergamy
complain about feminism/FDS/pink pill
complain about dead bedrooms
engage in whataboutism
explain why men think this way

I understand why, I need someone to convince me it's not unattractive feminine behavior.

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Mrs_Drgree · 2020-06-10T17:36:08+00:00

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Mrs_Drgree · 2020-06-10T17:43:43+00:00

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Mrs_Drgree · 2020-06-10T17:47:54+00:00

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cloudydays84 · 2020-06-10T19:57:25+00:00

Sounds like insecurity rather than just inherent unattractive feminine behavior

12112019 · 2020-06-10T21:41:02+00:00

Men are trying to evaluate if they are being harvested for resources or not, in the context in which a man has 0 risks and he doesn't plan to share his resources, then I agree he shouldn't care at all, and most men don't as you can see by the constant whining of women about the orgasm gaps, only men that have something to loose should care.

OXOzymandias · 2020-06-10T21:50:01+00:00

Yup that why i try not to talk about her desires or midnset or anything about what she thinks.....it is not my first way of thinking tho, i like to know what she feels, how she feels, but i learned that it was a turn off to a lot of women, a man not caring is attractive, maybe my biggest lesson from TRP....women dont want caring and reassuring men, the nost IDAGF you can be the better you are....

Tho i never cared about ncount, i dont even know why i would tbh

2020-06-10T22:06:35+00:00

Men ask questions when they aren't getting expected results. What's so hard to understand here? Never question stuff? It is important to understand female motivation for sex as it is important to understand your own motivation behind it.

In the past men were delusional. Now they start to wake up

kwalden2 · 2020-06-11T01:10:34+00:00

Ideally men just "do"? This is ridiculously gendered just like your characterization of behaviors as feminine. All people need to think and do, in sexual and nonsexual situations.

I'm sure men find it attractive to for women to project confidence as well! If everything is going well, both parties should be happy to just do the things. I'm also sure that both men and women would benefit from walking away if they were outwardly compared to other sexual partners. Who cares if that's unattractive to the person negging them?

staypositivebrad · 2020-06-11T02:30:44+00:00

If I just did what I wanted, I'd facefuck and tittyfuck her and never stick it in and never lick her out, so that's probably a dumb idea all around for women

I think you have a free-use kink.

2020-06-11T15:29:32+00:00

my husband's complete disregard for my inner world seems pretty masculine to me.

When you aren’t already married to them it is much more likely to lead to sexual assault. Stop punishing men for sexual assault and they’ll be more like that.

WilliamWyattD · 2020-06-11T15:33:56+00:00

I agree that there is something wrong about caring too much if the women you are with thinks you are the best looking, best fucking, best body, or whatever she has ever been with.

However, I do understand the more modern male concern that the women he is fucking is in fact enthusiastically enjoying sex with him--that her desire is real. It may not be the most desire she has ever felt, etc. But I want a woman to be enjoying herself in my bed, and not faking everything.

It sounds like your husband can essentially take this min. level of true enthusiastic desire for granted. However, there are indeed many men in situations where this is not necessarily the case. Often this is due to situations they have engineered themselves--choosing mates well above their looksmatch who agree to be with them for other reasons. Then these men want the woman to also enthusiastically be attracted to them. Desire is cruel and often doesn't work that way. It is natural, especially for women, to have trouble desiring that which is below them on the ladder of attractiveness. Men should understand this and stay in their leagues if they want partners who are able to truly desire them physically, and not go out of their league and then try to insist that the universe make 2 + 2 = 5 just for them.

2020-06-12T00:30:44+00:00

QUESTION FOR OP:

Are you talking about guys on reddit discussing it.

Or guys actually crazy enough to be thinking this shit whilst fucking.

If its the first, the guys on reddit. Well they are possibly (like myself) not on reddit to pull or meet "the one". So they probably don't give a fuck if they appear masculine or not. Worrying about appearing masculine is actually very unmasculine.

Like for instance, I can talk on reddit about picking my nose if I want. Its an anonymous website, so who really gives a fuck. Hence its good for these non-mainstream topics, such as womans motivation for sex. If something is not understood, then talking about it, is sometimes the next logical step. You follow me so far?

And yeah, some guys can go full on caveman, where they just don't give a fuck. Its a good state to be in. However, reddit is probably not the time or place for that mindset. So you will be seeing a different side of the guys as opposed to when they are fucking (if they ever get the chance).

Now if you are talking about guys overanalyzing this shit whilst fucking, that must be some god awful fuck. Nevermind if you think they are feminine or masculine. Are you fucking guys who think about this, behind your husbands back and are left feeling unsatisfied. Is that what inspired this post.

Sad-Soggy-Bread · 2020-06-17T18:16:01+00:00

This post is really confusing. You don’t want an explanation, but you want someone to convince you that what you find unattractive is in fact attractive? You can’t do that. You are attracted to what your attracted to. This post is pointless.

wub1234 · 2020-06-10T17:55:30+00:00

We've discussed this endlessly.

Your attitude makes virtually no difference to whether or not you're attractive. It can help you cope with the inevitable rejection.

Attraction mostly comes from looks, and it's mostly out of your control.

Some women don't want to accept this because, I assume, they don't want to be perceived as shallow, for some bizarre reason.

And some other people don't want to accept this because they want to believe, as we are generally brought up to believe (in order to mask the actual elitist reality), that if you strive for something rewards will be distributed meritocratically. That's why we're constantly told hard work, hard work, hard work all the time, as if hard work is always rewarded, or rewarded in anything approaching an even-handed fashion.

The reality is that you see someone, and you like the look of them. If they don't turn out to be too big a dick head, you might get together with them.

If you're neutral about their looks, if they can do something to impress you then you might start to feel attracted to them.

If you don't like the look of them, they've got absolutely no chance whatsoever.

That's the reality of life. All of this nonsense about 'masculine' attitudes is a load of fucking bollocks.

Title	Men concerned with women's motivation for sex display unattractive feminine behavior.
Author	philomexa
Upvotes	14
Comments	159
Date	June 10, 2020 3:42 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/h0dh4x/men_concerned_with_womens_motivation_for_sex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-concerned-with-womens-motivation-for-sex.697819 https://theredarchive.com/post/697819

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