Keanu Reeves was sued by a woman who suggested that he used hypnosis and impersonated her ex-husband to impregnate her. She sought $3 million in spousal support from the actor, and $150,000/month, retroactively, in child support. DNA test proved he was not the father and the suit was thrown out.

Tgunner192 · 2018-01-17T15:02:02+00:00

$150k/mo? That bitch just wanted money.

moose-rider32 · 2018-01-17T14:22:14+00:00

They did a DNA test? Those misogynists. Don't they believe the victim??

Esurugby11 · 2018-01-17T14:28:22+00:00

I hope she was jailed.

VapidReaper · 2018-01-17T13:02:18+00:00

😂 you can't get neo

jacksleepshere · 2018-01-17T14:19:47+00:00

Targeting Keanu is crossing te line.

aspinningcircle · 2018-01-17T15:01:59+00:00

There's not going to be any straight men left in Hollywood.

Jam_44 · 2018-01-17T16:43:49+00:00

lol like Keanu Reeves would need to use hypnosis for women to sleep with him...

seeking101 · 2018-01-17T15:34:33+00:00

So you're telling me I can dodge lawsuits?

No, Neo. What Im telling you is that as a famous male actor you will be bombarded with them.

theoldboiler · 2018-01-17T16:08:18+00:00

Headlines: Keanu Reeves used hypnosis to impersonate woman's husband in order to impregnate her, victim claims.

The reason it's OPs headline and not mine is only because dude took a fucking D.N.A. test to "prove" his innocence.

TheDemeisen · 2018-01-17T14:43:33+00:00

Who the hell is the lawyer that would take that case?

Invicturion · 2018-01-17T16:17:11+00:00

The fact thathe NEEDED to take that test is insane on its own...

Proteus_Marius · 2018-01-17T15:15:49+00:00

How does woo-encrusted batshittery even make it to a court room?

mwobuddy · 2018-01-17T13:10:50+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/7qxq5r/til_keanu_reeves_was_sued_by_a_woman_who/

Here's the original reddit.

Look at those posts! people are starting to get red pilled. God thank crazy money grubbing women proving that women lie about sexual assault for a chance at fame + money.

SushiGato · 2018-01-17T16:57:40+00:00

This shit is why I have a very hard time believing so many accusers. Like with Garrison Keilor being fired for hugging a crying co-worker and putting his hand on her back in support. That's fucked. Or when a ex porn star rightwing radio host says Franken groped her, but fails to mention how she grabbed his dick in front of every one before that happened. Its such bullshit.

Uberzwerg · 2018-01-17T19:48:14+00:00

A lesson learned in Germany in the 90s:
Anyone remember Boris becker the famous tennis star?
One day a woman sued him over the fathership of a little girl and he was like "i never fucked her - she just gave me a blowjob one day".
But he didn't see her swallow - BAM, he's really the father and had to pay a shit-ton of child support.

J0kerr · 2018-01-17T17:37:55+00:00

And did she face any penalty for trying to steal from/destroy someones life?

aimingforzero · 2018-01-17T18:02:32+00:00

Poor Keanu...he's been through so much, is so nice, and people still try to pull this shit on him? Also- That's one of the most creative accusations I've ever heard. Didn't even drug her- he HYPNOTIZED HER.

FastFourierTerraform · 2018-01-17T17:22:09+00:00

The thing that's important to note here is this isn't even that unusual. People wonder why dudes send unsolicited dick pics. Because 1 in 1000 times, it works. Same thing here. Male celebrities are under a constant barrage of false accusations by people looking for a payout. Most of the time, if journalists and lawyers do their job, we never hear about it. But every once in a while, some activist judge or some unethical reporter will move forward, and suddenly throwing the crazy person $100k to save yourself the headache seems like a really good deal. Glad Keanu came out ahead here.

2018-01-17T16:06:14+00:00

neo is not the one

ErdTheBird99 · 2018-01-17T17:38:18+00:00

This satisfies two Reddit sweet spots right now: Keanu and debunking false accusations of people we like.

2018-01-17T17:38:31+00:00

She’s from my hometown, and this was huge news when it happened. I think her kids may have changed their last names.

run_mochila · 2018-01-17T17:51:45+00:00

All I really want to know is if she had to pay his court fees after the fact. It's fucking outrageous that you can take people to court in attempt to sue people for anything.

2018-01-17T18:55:20+00:00

metoo

Wolosocu · 2018-01-17T22:41:13+00:00

$3 million a month spousal support and $150k for child support. Well we can see where her priorities were.

patricarchy · 2018-01-18T01:10:42+00:00

He's lucky this didn't happen in the #metoo era. He would have had his career derailed with one anonymous tweet.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2018-01-17T17:54:46+00:00

Listen and believe! Women are biologically incapable of lying. It's a femfact.

Trajer · 2018-01-17T16:02:41+00:00

I hope they showed the results Maury-style. Keanu Reeves, you are... NOT THE FATHER!

Catmouth · 2018-01-17T16:57:06+00:00

So is Keanu Uther Pendragon now?

Violent_Paprika · 2018-01-17T17:48:13+00:00

So fake obviously everyone knows vampires get a -100% debuff to fertility.

yoshi314 · 2018-01-17T20:05:57+00:00

so no one contested the ludicrity of 150k/month until the dna test?

or am i just jumping to conclusions?

Zyklon_Bae · 2018-01-17T20:53:11+00:00

Why the hell didn't this get thrown out LONG before a DNA test was done? What utter lunacy!

chadwickofwv · 2018-01-17T21:43:26+00:00

We seriously need a one year statute of limitations on child support to stop bullshit like this.

moose-rider32 · 2018-01-17T21:46:09+00:00

$150k a month? Wtf she doing with her kid? Buying gold lined nappies or some shit?

doublesailorsandcola · 2018-01-17T21:57:19+00:00

If Keanu wanted to pick some random married woman to impregnate, he wouldn’t have to use hypnosis and impersonate the husband. He could just show up being his charming self. Clearly this lady is a few crayons short of a full box.

Terminal-Psychosis · 2018-01-17T22:00:38+00:00

Some men are in jail right now for not being able to pay,

even though the DNA test came out negative!

Our court systems are totally sexist and abusive. :(

2018-01-17T22:38:11+00:00

One could say he dodged that bullet!

Giovannnnnnnni · 2018-01-17T22:44:06+00:00

What sucks is that every time someone does this, the defendant still has to pay for a lawyer.

Brehmes · 2018-01-17T22:49:16+00:00

Neo: So you're telling me that I can dodge paternity suits?

Morpheus: No Neo, I'm telling you that when you're ~~ready~~ a legitimately good dude, you won't have to.

Teknikal69 · 2018-01-17T23:25:41+00:00

I'm going to just say it hypnotism is utter bullshit, it's people who play along for fun or people who are desperate trying to make it so.

Hypnotism is nonsense, I myself even had a few years where I desperately wanted to learn how it worked my ultimate conclusion is while it makes for good entertainment it's ultimately nonsense.

ie: not a real thing why are courts going along with nonsense.

AmuseDeath · 2018-01-18T02:00:34+00:00

#believeallwomen

fsphoenix · 2018-01-17T18:13:21+00:00

Facts aside....what the flying fuck. $150,000 a MONTH for child support?

AyyyGreens · 2018-01-17T18:30:31+00:00

Anyone who has done hypnosis and isn’t a sucker knows that you can’t hypnotize someone into doing whatever they want. It’s just impossible unless they were already incredibly susceptible to suggestion. The more likely and logical answer is that she lied, and didn’t do her research.

LabTech41 · 2018-01-17T20:01:01+00:00

Why the fuck would you need a DNA test? How do you not just throw the case out on account of the inherent absurdity of the accusation? I mean, fine, do the test just so that all the i's are dotted and all the t's are crossed, but holy fuck what a blatant and obvious case of extortion.

HedgeTheHog · 2018-01-17T20:17:43+00:00

Nice try.

abacabbmk · 2018-01-17T20:52:20+00:00

Hmmmm.... i guess we know if she took the red or blue pill.... because she still got pregnant

winningtimes909 · 2018-01-17T20:53:10+00:00

She should have taken the blue pill instead.

ArmaniDiamonds · 2018-01-17T23:38:45+00:00

Dear god. I hope every male actor starts a hashtag for every time they were falsely accused. This shit is ridiculous. #ImATarget

coltninja · 2018-01-17T23:48:32+00:00

Yes, children, that is called a civil suit. This is what happens to stupid ones.

roguetrooper · 2018-01-18T00:50:14+00:00

So she was saying that he dipped his wick?

Bing_Bang_Bam · 2018-01-18T01:24:53+00:00

Now I see why it's sad keanu

loki-things · 2018-01-18T02:33:15+00:00

He did the same to me and I knocked up that girl from the paint store down the street. I want money.

Waldhorn · 2018-01-18T05:11:59+00:00

What? No One believed the Victim? #metoo, Remake all of his movies without him, now or I skreeeeee

Akesgeroth · 2018-01-18T10:23:20+00:00

So, enough people think Keanu Reeves has psychic powers to get this to court.

ash_park · 2018-01-18T13:43:13+00:00

#ibelieveher

JackFisherBooks · 2018-01-18T19:19:41+00:00

I honestly thought this was an Onion article when I first heard about it. The fact that it isn't kind of disturbs me.

GeneralCottonmouth · 2018-01-17T19:55:32+00:00

fuck all this Keanu bullshit

akamustacherides · 2018-01-17T15:55:48+00:00

and she went on to start the #metoo movement.

MGTOWManofMystery · 2018-01-17T19:16:32+00:00

What about #MeToo? I thought men were guilty by default always!

What about that crazy YouTuber who claims she mind melds with Brent Spiner?

SniffJizzer · 2018-01-17T14:11:37+00:00

I swear some bitches deserve to get domestically abused

Comments

metoo

#ibelieveher