I cannot believe this is my reality.

RideATX · 2023-06-28T18:09:39+00:00

Dude, she sucks... You've got to let her go and move on. There are better girls out there.

No-Blackberry7887 · 2023-06-28T18:32:07+00:00

You need to go to therapy to get through this in my opinion. This is traumatic and she left a huge hole in your heart. You have to move and no longer wait for to acknowledge you and your feelings. It's like asking " why did the snake bite me, I was feeding it and taking care of it?". Accept the fact that is what snakes do. Don't try to analyze her consciousness and her why's. That is who she is and not worth your time. Find a way to occupy your time when thinking about this. Good luck!

Old-Macaroon8148 · 2023-06-28T18:41:12+00:00

I’m not a psychologist but I believe you a describing what’s called a trauma-bond. Google it. You may need a professional to help you break this and move on with your life.

ABBucsfan · 2023-06-28T18:39:10+00:00

At some point you start simply referring to them as 'my kids mother'. That's what they need to become and nothing more

Diablo_Canyon2 · 2023-06-28T20:15:21+00:00

Block her on Facebook, then get a therapist and a gym membership

MartyMcFly7 · 2023-06-28T18:16:39+00:00

I think you know you shouldn't miss someone who was unfaithful (you deserve better). You need to look deeper and figure out why you still care so much about someone who mistreated you. (Maybe rejection or abandonment issues with your parents?)

There are 4 billion other women on the planet, forget about the crappy ones and find a better one.

Funny_Wolverine_9 · 2023-06-28T19:13:19+00:00

You will never move on without getting closure for yourself and the best way to do that is by forgiving her.

I was falsely accused of rape and that's how I was able to move on. I had kids/house taken away from me with 1 false accusation. Took me years to clear my name.

Reflog1791 · 2023-06-28T18:47:27+00:00

Let her go and move on. A year from now I think you’ll feel better, with tons of awesome new memories with your kid. Good luck.

Cowfootstew · 2023-06-28T18:50:57+00:00

I feel like you need to find a new woman(s) to skeet on or in. This and time will help to clear both of your heads. Leave out of your thoughts and find new pleasures in life bro.

Classic_Dill · 2023-06-28T21:29:43+00:00

That's because you have done nothing to repair/heal yourself, you allowed yourself to wallow in self pity....ready for the good news? its time to change all that, start reading and researching, see why you let red flags pass you by, get some self respect man! we all have trauma from divorce, some more then others, but its time to be selfish, time to work on you!! she cheated on you, disrespected you, talked shit behind your back to the guys she wasf22king! and you miss her? do you see the mental health issue with that? you need to develop some scar tissue and get really angry, aren't you angry? why not? my gut says she groomed you into a fine powder, STOP IT!! get your backbone back and start seeing what she did to you, are you a lifelong slave? you cant move on, till you get angry about what she has done to you, its savage! then let that fire carry you through till you heal.

You must learn to have self respect, right now you have none or you wouldn't still love an abusive, manipulative user of an ex wife.

And get to a Psychiatrist, you may have PTSD and you need to get out the marriage bubble fast, you're still completely blind.

Competitive_Drop_908 · 2023-06-29T02:00:19+00:00

Therapy
No contact.

I dealt with something similar and the second I went no contact my emotional health sky rocketed. As in 100% no contact. Therapy helped me process everything I was feeling.

ApprehensiveStudy671 · 2023-06-28T21:09:49+00:00

You need to take some time off and disconnect from everything by traveling to a far away land. Couple of months to South East Asia or Latin America....just somewhere different and safe. Just relax and enjoy your time. No internet, not social media, nothing.

While there remember that you deserve better in life. You need to build a new life, new hobbies, new state, new town if you can. You need to rebuild yourself and your self-esteem. Eventually you will end up meeting a woman who respects you and loves you. In the meantime, date other women, have fun and enjoy life.

Your ex-wife ruined your life once, she will do it again if you let her. Move on and above all, never take her back.

rickyspanish12345 · 2023-06-28T19:12:32+00:00

It takes time bro. Stay strong and maintain no contact. I can almost guarantee that by this time next year you’ll be thinking “man, I’m sure glad that pussy is sled is gone. WTF was I thinking”

Jonger1150 · 2023-06-28T19:58:27+00:00

Fine a new chick

AnonJetlag · 2023-06-28T21:38:38+00:00

Why do you still have her added on Facebook? Block her, not out of pettiness but out of sight out of mind

DicksOut4Edamame · 2023-06-28T22:14:47+00:00

I think you're where I'm at, OP...You don't miss her, you miss the life you'd created and mapped out with her in mind. You can still have that, it will just look a bit different and be with a different (read better, healthier, more loving) wife.

God bless, and reach out if you need to chat

ThinlyDisguised · 2023-06-29T03:10:39+00:00

She's looking at your FB stories to find something to use against you in court or to harm your reputation with others. I promise you, there is no other reason. You can block her on FB, but she'll create a fake account to stalk you with. Stop sharing stories on FB or any other social media. You don't need to share stories on FB to satisfy friends and family. It will be your undoing. Loose lips sink ships. You're at war. Accept it, embrace it and move the fuck on.

Unable-Economy983 · 2023-06-29T06:44:25+00:00

Bro, don't worry! You're free from her gravitational pull. Time to explore the universe of amazing women!

Title	I cannot believe this is my reality.
Author	Weekly_Firefighter74
Upvotes	27
Comments	41
Date	June 28, 2023 5:43 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/14lfzhb/i_cannot_believe_this_is_my_reality/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/i-cannot-believe-this-is-my-reality.1223837 https://theredarchive.com/post/1223837

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