If i could pass any knowledge for future generations is this. Lowering your standards is never worth it.

TheOGJammies · 2020-07-25T17:29:31+00:00

This is item #1 on our "37 lies you were taught about men" blog post!

Thestral-glow6 · 2020-07-25T13:54:13+00:00

Can confirm! Have given a couple of guys who weren’t exactly “lookers” a chance and they actually ended up treating me worse then anyone else did.. It’s like their ego inflates and suddenly they’re too good for ME 😐

darkestpurple · 2020-07-25T16:24:00+00:00

Not Dr. Doofenschmirz 😭 I agree though, I'm an advocate for not lowering your standards even on the looks department. I can't imagine ever going for a guy I'm not attracted to. I'm well-aware of my league so I'm def realistic in that sense. Also, it's not like men would ever be with you if they thought you were ugly. So why should we?

Saitschik · 2020-07-25T14:08:09+00:00

Yes, total myth. Good-looking guys usually treat you better, because they are less likely to be bitter and full of self-esteem issues.

SpectralCadence · 2020-07-25T14:13:00+00:00

This is why I'm done with shy nerdy introverted types. It's also not a woman's job to build up a man's confidence and self-esteem.

timetofliptables · 2020-07-25T15:34:06+00:00

I had a friend date a guy she thought was ugly because she thought he’d be safer (and did genuinely fall for him)

Dude cheated on her.

I wanted to be like... if you’d date him someone else would too... that seems obvious. Made me sad. She’s an awesome person.

RavenWudgieRose · 2020-07-25T19:17:30+00:00

To quote Billie Eilish:

Why is every pretty girl with a horrible looking man? I don’t understand. Look, I’m not shaming people for their looks, but I am though. You give an ugly guy a chance, he thinks he rules the world. I swear to God, because they got a hot girl, they can be horrible? Like, you’re still ugly though. Can’t change that. Maybe that’s why. Maybe that’s why guys with small dicks get like huge mansions. To make up for it, you know. Or like really nice cars, you know.

ErikaNaumann · 2020-07-25T19:22:01+00:00

I gave a chance to a guy that was shorter than me by 15cm, slightly ugly too. He seemed very nice at first. As time moved on he started projecting his insecurities towards me, and I went from "looking like a model" to "being average at best". He started constantly putting me down, ignoring or demeaning my accomplishments, and trying to make me feel ugly:

-"you should die your hair red, or just shave it off" (I have straight, long, dark blond hair)

"are you bringing the acne look back?" (when I had an allergic reaction to a sunscreen)
"where are you going dressed like that, you try too hard" (I was literally wearing a man's t-shirt, denim shorts and running shoes)
"why do you go to the hairdresser? It's too expensive" (mind you he never paid for anything, so he was complaining about me using MY own money for a basic 20 euro haircut lol)
"you think you look good? You are so conceited", etc etc

Never again. I would rather die alone.

RedditRabbitt · 2020-07-25T19:53:58+00:00

I swear they treat you the worst. Best I ever got treated was my husband who is a very handsome Australian Italian! Worst.. ugly dude in a wheelchair. After that I realized that I wasn’t settling ever again.

2020-07-25T15:48:32+00:00

Ugly guys just watch a ton of porn cuz they can't swing other girls usually unless they're super charming, but they still TRY to get other girls, most just don't want them. Just happened to me. I'm about a 6-7 on the scale and there's no lack of male attention, but him? LMAO. My friends cringed at him. I still think he's attractive though, but I tend to like a unique set of characteristics apparently known as heroin chic or sociopathic xD Moving away from that style this time. No more skinny, unhealthy body types, It shows a lack of regard for their personal health and usually leads them to being extremely insecure. I don't understand men. My ex-PA was so insecure about his dick and his dick was bigger than over half of the dudes I've been with and often hurt me, but he still felt it was "too small". Porn fucks dudes up, but yeah, the insecure guys are the fucking worst.

mlb897 · 2020-07-25T20:17:24+00:00

In my experience, ugly guys actually treat you worse. Probably out of projecting insecurity. I find that the best looking guys I've dated have also been the best personality wise, and just better men overall.

cece188 · 2020-07-25T20:31:19+00:00

I once was telling my dad how I’ve put a hold on dating indefinitely because of how the guys I encounter aren’t really worth it, and he always says that maybe I need to go for a guy who isn’t so attractive because he’ll treat me better than a good looking guy, who he always assumes are “bad boys.”

Like what??? If a man is a piece of shit, he’s a piece of shit regardless of what he looks like. I’ve given ugly guys a chance so I wouldn’t be seen as “shallow” and they’ve always treated me WORSE than a good looking guy.

Isn’t it hilarious how a man wouldn’t do the same for an “ugly” woman though? Men are encouraged to find the “hottest 10” and to not even have any human decency/respect for women who are not so attractive. Women on the other hand HAVE to give chances to ugly men who don’t take care of themselves otherwise they’re “shallow” or “stuck-up.”

_Amarantos · 2020-07-25T16:26:44+00:00

Yup, without fail you give an ugly guy a chance and he starts acting like you’re the ugly one.

AnniaT · 2020-07-25T17:39:37+00:00

I found out that ugly men are the most bitter and violent (in general). They feel a rush of power when they suddenly have a woman and resent the hot guys women fall for. At least the good looking men usually don't have to pretend to be nice guys and it's easier to see how they are, while many ugly men put this "nice guy" persona to get the girl. I'm generalizing of course, but the "ugly men treat you better statement" seems to have been invented by bitter ugly men.

Pasdepromesses · 2020-07-25T16:00:40+00:00

I have dated a wonderful guy that wasn’t very handsome (I say this in a nice way because his character actually makes up for a lot) for 5 years, but he was very successful, happy and confident and treated me really really well. We only broke up because we had different goals in life and are still amicable.

Have dated very handsome and fit guys who were not happy and/or insecure that treated me not that well, but well enough for me to stick around for 2 years.

The worst were two mediocre guys (fairly handsome) who were fucking miserable and mentally fucked up. True NVM who were very abusive. Both lasted for only 5 months then I gtfo.

I think it has 100% to do with how secure they are with themselves, the level of happiness and character.

Newwavesupport3657 · 2020-07-25T21:40:54+00:00

My sister dated a boy we called “ giraffe neck” and he still cheated on her.

thewetdog_ · 2020-07-25T16:46:22+00:00

Thats why you shouldn’t date ugly dudes all men are dogs some just more hidden down than others or have more restraint

So if you’re gonna bother at all date then hottest and richest you can get

catchaleaf · 2020-07-25T21:33:39+00:00

Dated a guy who did not match my level of looks, here is what I heard “do you think you’re like a model or something”, “you are getting older”... okay, but he’s older than me and it shows while I actually get scouted to be a model and look way younger than my age. I’m not the insecure one, why should I apologize for that. One of my friends gets constant attacks on her weight by a guy who is no where close to her level. It really is projection, and society tries to get you too by saying “only caring about looks is shallow”, but these guys don’t know how to act when they land a pretty one.

perkytitssolidshits · 2020-07-25T20:00:53+00:00

More insecure people tend to be on the ugly end of physical looks, thus the need for constant validation and cheating when they can. Ugly men cheat more than above average and very attractive men.

Better looking men/charismatic men who have experienced being wanted their whole life, who know they could have who they want .. are better partners. They go for you because you offer more and they don’t need that constant validation because they had it and kno it means shit all.

trudith · 2020-07-25T18:10:43+00:00

The least traditionally good looking (I wouldn’t call him ugly) boyfriend I’ve had was definitely the nicest to me. But that doesn’t make it an actual THING. They may or may not be. Sometimes ugly guys are incels.

hikurangi2019 · 2020-07-26T01:57:23+00:00

I used to only pick out guys women aren’t interested in dating thinking if I treat them well they’re gonna treat me much much better than guys with a giant ego; now I just feel hurt and naive asf :/

goblinwiseau · 2020-07-25T22:12:09+00:00

idk how girls do it. i can never, ever date a guy who is not handsome in the face..EVER. it physically repulses me. face is my thing tho i guess lol. like some people like big booties, a nice back or nice feet. mine is face.

but yes, i know many pretty girls who are sweet who get with ugly on the outside and inside men. i will never understand it. at least date your looks match or date a hot bad boy ffs

yeetyopyeet · 2020-07-25T19:57:41+00:00

Dated a guy I didn’t think was particularly attractive but decided to give him a chance because I didn’t want to be “shallow”. He was so insecure, constantly said how he was “punching”, needed reassurance from me everyday and eventually cheated on me. I will never give an insecure guy a chance again lol

honeybeeroll · 2020-07-25T19:08:12+00:00

"Dr. Doofenschmirz" 💀💀💀 whether objectively average looking or objectively hot, what matters is if he likes himself and is comfortable in his body. Like here's a story of 2 nerds for example:

I dated a nerd who wasn't objectively hot but I thought was cute, he had a nice body, but woah did he have a boat load of self esteem issues, partly coming from his nerdy interest and how he related to his appearance.

Sometime later I dated another nerdy guy, who was not objectively hot, but he was confident enough to easily approach me, and within the first 5 mins of meeting, when we were talking about our interests, he told me he liked magic the gathering 😂 He was like "I'm telling you all these things that are clearly very attractive" Like he could poke fun at himself about it because he was comfortable with who he was and how he looked. He was occasionally self depricating in that way I like from guys, where it's because they're confident, not because they're hiding low self esteem.

So, neither were objectively hot, both were nerds (tho the first was a video game and anime nerd. I know, what tf was wrong with me), but one didn't like himself, and of course that made its way into our relationship, whereas the other one did. Ugly break up with nerd 1 who was such a fucking nice guy, amicable "break up" (we weren't official) with nerd 2, whom I remained friends with.

Same thing w/ short guys. You're not having trouble dating bc women dislike short guys. You're just a shitty person 🤷‍♀️

snootthepoop · 2020-07-25T19:34:54+00:00

Reminds me of Ed and Rosemarie, 90 day fiancee.

DrRainbowBrite · 2020-07-25T19:51:45+00:00

Can confirm

Bern2024 · 2020-07-25T22:52:11+00:00

Also why tf would I date a ugly guy, he brings nothing

sisterofnarcissus · 2020-07-26T08:46:25+00:00

Ugly men are salty because they don’t get models

Snowlamp · 2020-07-26T10:10:42+00:00

Ah yes, I've only been with four men, and the first one is the only good looking one, the only one who treated me properly... we only split because we went to different universities.

The most overweight man, was the worst, constantly going on about how I should look, on about beautiful famous women all the time.
Telling me how to dress, in expensive clothes and shoes, yet I only ever saw him in his retail job branded polo shirt or lounge shorts.
I was tiny and very fit and healthy, he was huge, yet apparently I wasn't attractive enough to be seen in public with according to him.

He was such a dick.

Aily333 · 2020-07-25T17:51:35+00:00

I’ve never dated an ugly guy but all the hot guys I’ve met were assholes. The regular guys I’ve been with treated me like a princess... Anyone know why that is?

MotznRoth · 2020-07-25T21:10:19+00:00

I am now reminded of the Phineas and Ferb episode with Dr. Doofenschmirtz's Handsome-inator. For a childrens' cartoon, and played for laughs as it was, that episode was pretty based with regards.to lookism. Also oddly enough I don't find Doof ugly!!

selfdistructt_ion · 2020-07-26T07:56:48+00:00

This is SO TRUE in so many levels! A few years ago, before I knew what I wanted in life I put up
with not-so-attractive guys and their toxic BS just because they found me attractive and wanted to date me. In my head my thoughts were" I was being open minded and kind, not judging them by their looks, they are supposed to be nice and they don't cheat" etc. All that happened was them treating me poorly, use my body and make ME feel bad about how things ended.

Had to swallow hard life lessons to get where I am. I am so glad I found this FDS!

butternutsquashin · 2020-07-25T20:26:57+00:00

Don’t do Doofinshmirtz like this 😢

XimsRocks · 2020-07-26T03:09:02+00:00

Man this is so true! I have dated very handsome guys that treated me great, and the ugliest one I dated was so entitled. It was so annoying!

TankGirl1997 · 2020-07-25T20:45:38+00:00

Adorkable misogyny is still misogyny (as in nerdy men are just as sexist as macho men) #gamergate lol

sourrolls · 2020-07-25T22:06:42+00:00

Ugly boys get one chance and start acting like they look like Morris Chestnut

fille_hideuse · 2020-07-26T11:55:26+00:00

Can confirm 100%.

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Tequila_Hoeseph · 2020-07-25T19:51:24+00:00

Hey don't insult Dr. Doofenshmirtz!

Title	If i could pass any knowledge for future generations is this. Lowering your standards is never worth it.
Author	brendavv93
Upvotes	1931
Comments	65
Date	July 25, 2020 1:24 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hxmnwn/if_i_could_pass_any_knowledge_for_future/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/if-i-could-pass-any-knowledge-for-future.717402 https://theredarchive.com/post/717402

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