No girlfriend benefits without exclusivity.

tellmesomething11 · 2020-12-02T03:07:20+00:00

And don’t forget, being “exclusive” doesn’t mean much. Being boyfriend and girlfriend doesn’t even mean much, so to insult you by not even making that level of commitment, and instead opting for the vague, FWBesque “exclusive” title, don’t even bother.

luna_prismatic · 2020-12-02T05:37:12+00:00

I had one loser ex get visibly angry and lowkey verbally abusive when I told him on like the second or third time seeing him that I was also going on dates with other men, since we weren’t exclusive and had literally just met. He pressured me into cutting off my other options and giving him exclusivity immediately after that, all the meantime without calling me his girlfriend. After a month of doing everything a relationship would be, I sat him down and presented my logical, thought out argument about why I deserve a title (🤡), since we were essentially already in a relationship ie I was giving him 100% girlfriend benefits. He agreed, but the held it over my head for the duration of the miserable, horrifically abusive time I spent with him that I had manipulated HIM into getting into a relationship with that conversation. Ofc he also used pseudo psych bullshit to justify it, saying I fast tracked the relationship inappropriately, etc. Same old, same old, every relationship problem and abuse suffered at his hands was the result of me and my clingyneedydemanding personality flaws, lol. Lesson learned, men want all the benefits and commitment of a relationship on your end, but don’t want to reciprocate the same. And will blame you if you “demand” respect and reciprocation. Obviously, my former clown ass shouldn’t have ever had to convince a guy to “give me” a label either.

naenita_ · 2020-12-02T05:34:37+00:00

What would be GF benefits? (Curious)

No going on dates with other men No meeting his friends/family No introducing him to friends/family No being each others +1 Loyalty (no kissing/hooking up with others)

Looking for more!

Savorycorncake · 2020-12-02T04:51:50+00:00

I’ve even noticed that if you cook for a guy before exclusivity he starts to get sloppy and put less effort in. And will start with constant requests for you to make different things for him

CountingDownTheDays5 · 2020-12-02T04:22:19+00:00

Ladies: Dating is not exclusivity, exclusivity is not being a girlfriend, and being a girlfriend is not being a wife.

While different stages of the relationship you could have with this person, some are very different than the other. Also if he doesn't say it, IT DID NOT HAPPEN. If he never said you are dating then you aren't if he never said you are exclusive you aren't, and if he never asked you to be his girlfriend you aren't. But biggest if he is f-ing you without any of these thing set 9.9/10 you will never get to any of these things. Well count I knew a girl who knew a girl who knew a girl that did FWB and is now married. <---- Pick-me words, don't fall for it.

Diamond_fairy · 2020-12-02T06:20:10+00:00

If he's enough into you and wants it secured, he'll make it clear that he wants you to be officially his girlfriend during the first month of dating. No sex prior to official and public commitment is mandatory. Will it take months? Fine.

He (not you) will bring up marriage one or two years after, depending on how young you are. During this period, you do not cohabitate, even if the sky is falling on your head. And do not care for his home and food, ffs.

It's either that he thinks that you match or you don't, he is serious or he's not. Deciding that a person is (not) the right one is not rocket science and he does not need the time of a full master degree.

rediitbuju · 2020-12-02T06:35:18+00:00

All positions comes with rights and responsibilities, including exclusiveness

goldiebaby · 2020-12-02T18:04:14+00:00

The cringe I feel when I see women cooking, cleaning and keeping a house for losers who can't even "put a label" on their situationship, ugh. No words. Please don't (or do) head to /r/datingover30. A sh*itshow in every way.

juju0716 · 2020-12-02T09:05:13+00:00

By when should you be exclusive? Honestly I think that's the confusing part.

nyclaurco · 2020-12-02T16:53:36+00:00

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partypancakesbacon · 2020-12-02T22:33:03+00:00

Agree but what if I don’t want to get married? I’m self sufficient, own my own home, great job, etc. Why would I want to marry? Aside from a prenup I’m not sure how to protect myself when looking to take the next step like cohabitation in my home or sharing some of my benefits.

NecessaryCook · 2020-12-02T03:01:52+00:00

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2020-12-08T19:23:34+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	No girlfriend benefits without exclusivity.
Author	NecessaryCook
Upvotes	704
Comments	112
Date	December 2, 2020 2:59 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/k50pva/no_girlfriend_benefits_without_exclusivity/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/no-girlfriend-benefits-without-exclusivity.1193546 https://theredarchive.com/post/1193546

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