Princess Charming Syndrome

sleepysiri · 2021-07-18T09:46:25+00:00

Not only to they believe in The One or a Dream Girl, they think they’re entitled to the pretty, accomplished, therapist, mommy, bangmaid. ENTITLED to it. Just because they’re a dude.

Platipus6 · 2021-07-18T10:54:33+00:00

These types think that their life will be magically fixed once they "get a girl". As if they can absorb the skills, habits, routines, motivation and discipline it takes to adult with one's shit together. "I want what she's got. It's a woman doing it, so it can't be that hard".

They end up fucking up every aspect of our lives and dragging us down to their level. We don't "glow up" when we dump them. We return to normal.

happygolukcy · 2021-07-18T08:56:34+00:00

Oh wow, finally a perfect term for it. And the only thing I’d say is if you do happen to get one that doesn’t move on from you quick/isn’t a fuccboi - it’s someone who lovebombs, projects his ideals onto you (the 500 days of summer syndrome), swears you’re out of their league (spoiler alert: you are but you’re in your pickme/ poor self esteem era so you don’t know that), keeps saying you deserve better than him but constantly guilt trips and manipulates you into staying with him because woe is he and he’ll never find anyone like you (the you being someone who confused pity for love). They want you to FAWN. Fawn like crazy so they feed off the temporary high your “love” gives them.

Convinces you that him being an eventual house husband (see: bum who plays video games all day, doesn’t do anything to further him self and doesn’t make any efforts to pull his weight) is what you want. Has severe mental health issues that he knowingly does not address, yet all the while expects you to be the mommy-gf, to be therapist, teacher, and everything all in one. & yes also speaks negatively about ex partners, convinces you that he was the victim.

Yep I know this all tooooo damn well.

lolmemberberries · 2021-07-18T12:33:20+00:00

Oh, yeah. The Manic Pixie Dream Girl who will make their life worthwhile and fix them. With their lack of self-awareness and introspection, they don't see that the common denominator is them.

onefoulowl · 2021-07-18T12:59:48+00:00

I have experience dating men that won't commit to you for the specific reason that you aren't their 'dream girl' but if you look back at people they have dated and been in long-term relationships with, it is honestly perplexing.

With the last person I dated, it lasted three months before he broke it off, saying he 'just wasn't feeling it' and that he was specifically looking for a long term partner and he couldn't see us staying together and working out. I asked if he could give me any specific reasons about why he couldn't see a future with me and he couldn't give me one apart from 'a feeling' that the relationship wasn't right. Not to sound stuck-up but I am smart, have a master's degree, a career and am fit, healthy and good looking with no serious mental health issues. Me and this guy got on very well and could talk for hours on any topic as he was very intelligent and we shared similar interests and goals for the future. He also definitely was physically attracted to me. Yet despite all this is still wasn't 'enough'.

When he broke it off it was completely unexpected. In hindsight he was an LVM, but I was so completely shocked to be dumped by someone whose relationship history with past girlfriends sounded so terrible. Before me he had dated a girl for a year who he described as drinking to the point to the point she got incredibly drunk on a weekly basis and then would shout at him/and lie down in the middle of the street when they went out making him carry her home as she thought it was some great romantic gesture. He said that every week there was a different argument between them over something, and that she voted for Brexit and would regularly tell him to go back to Germany (where he was from) whenever they disagreed about anything politics wise. He said they had only one good month together at the beginning of the relationship but it took him eleven month to break things off. When he broke up with me after a short time of things going well, I just remember thinking how was it he could date someone for a while year with it being so dysfunctional but with me and things going so well he decided 'he wasn't feeling it.'

His past was obviously a massive red flag, which I chose to ignore at the time because I was drawn to his intellect but it also makes me question what is it that LVM picture when they see their dream woman? From his exes I know his type seemed to be alternative girls with dyed hair, tattoos, and piercings which I was not, but if you imagine these mens' perfect girl as an accomplished educated women with model looks, look at who they have dated in the past and stayed with despite claiming they were 'problematic and crazy', and you realise that their dream girl is often not all he makes them out to be, and often they reflect who he thinks he deserves - someone equally as shitty.

greeneyesrosylips · 2021-07-18T10:23:49+00:00

I was that dream girl, that 10/10 that supposedly made him change without me ever trying to. I felt on top of the world. Guess what? He left me too. That "The One" thing is a trap to make us compete and hate each other over a LVM mommy's boy and college dropout (case of my ex). I refuse to let a man define my value (even in a supposedly positive way) like that again.

Graellsiaisabellae · 2021-07-18T11:39:03+00:00

And if they do get a woman that approaches their warped concept of the One then there's the Madonna-Whore complex that is inherently unachievable. So either she will not act like his personal pornstar in bed, or if she does, her worth will lower. So he leaves her, and the cycle repeats itself.

sozwrongrobi · 2021-07-18T14:35:01+00:00

Sounds exactly like Ted Mosby

I can’t watch HIMYM now because of that weasel.

complex_answer_22 · 2021-07-18T16:57:32+00:00

ALL of the men that have called me their "dream girl" have treated me like shit. My "friend" that was "in love with me" and said I was his dream girl for years, called me a diseased whore while drunk because I made friends with his friends. I've never had an STD and I've had very few sex partners, so he was just being cruel.

pozzalovah · 2021-07-18T13:54:30+00:00

The only time you might "change" a guy is to have high standards and have the ability to just leave at the first sight of a red flag.

SkiesEclipse · 2021-07-18T16:40:45+00:00

Reminds me a bit of “500 days of summer.” He builds summer up in his head as this perfect woman, and he’s absolutely obsessed with her. When she breaks up with him, he’s convinced no one else will ever do.

But as time goes on, and he goes over the relationship in his head, he starts to realize that all these moments in their relationship, he was looking at through rose coloured glasses. In fact, there were several signs it was the beginning of the end.

feelgoodlost_ · 2021-07-18T17:11:39+00:00

It’s all fun and games until they have to provide or follow your boundaries. When you actually have an emergency and they can step up, they don’t. You figure it out or someone else helps and then they get mad you didn’t let them save (fuck up) the day. It’s why they love bomb so hard at the beginning when you express your opinion on things that won’t fly with you.

They lie the whole time and then change the terms and conditions, give you an ultimatum, and then turn it around on you. It’s so pointless. And if leagues don’t exist according to them, then why do they even say this bs at all? It’s literal crazy making because they’re demonic toddlers. Oh right, because Scrotes are delusional. They truly don’t want a damsel in distress, they just want a damsel to stress tf out and tolerate their insanity and manipulation. They know they aren’t reliable or able to stand alone, it’s why the jump from relationship to relationship and claim they did everythinggggggg, when they didn’t.

seraphinelysion · 2021-07-18T13:02:18+00:00

This is a very dangerous mindset for men to have. They think that everything wrong with their life is because they don't have a woman/gf/wife yet and that if only they could get one, then everything will magically become better! When they finally manage to get a woman interested in them, and they see that their life is more or less the same (just now he's able to have sex too), he's going to start resenting her for not being good enough to have changed his life for the better. He's going to be wondering why everything isn't going perfectly for him. He's going to wonder what's wrong with YOU that his life is still the same. And that's when his eye will start wandering and the cheating begins because obviously... you aren't "enough."

Every damn time. Without fail.

marlenemermaid · 2021-07-20T17:44:40+00:00

Harsh truth, their “Dream Girl” will mostly likely not want them.

Watzoo · 2021-07-18T18:29:16+00:00

Oh definitely.

Here’s their theme song: https://open.spotify.com/track/4fIWvT19w9PR0VVBuPYpWA

Title	Princess Charming Syndrome
Author	dancedancedance7
Upvotes	466
Comments	42
Date	July 18, 2021 8:35 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ommptm/princess_charming_syndrome/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/princess-charming-syndrome.793406 https://theredarchive.com/post/793406

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