Reminder: Do background checks before dates!

luxurypinkvirgo · 2021-03-20T13:31:20+00:00

This is why vetting is so important.

_nylea · 2021-03-20T13:54:49+00:00

“Most girls these days—“ Block

But yeah...yikes. This is terrible but unfortunately so unsurprising to me at this point. I’m glad I don’t date anymore.

Lunarfalcon025 · 2021-03-20T14:11:03+00:00

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oddcharm · 2021-03-20T15:13:44+00:00

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berryberrykicks · 2021-03-20T14:32:41+00:00

I LOVE that she reported his account.

That dude completely sucks, which was obvious the moment he “praised” her by disparaging other women.

oddcharm · 2021-03-20T15:19:00+00:00

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nothing998 · 2021-03-20T15:27:23+00:00

I don't understand why every man feels the need to aggressively state his opinion about a woman's appearance. I see them do it constantly. If you watch groups of men online, some will occasionally post random pictures of women, and without fail the replies are always critiquing her appearance. They just love to do it. They do it even when no women are around let alone the woman in the picture.

2021-03-20T16:08:59+00:00

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brylm92 · 2021-03-20T15:46:26+00:00

How many dudes on this post were outraged by her "invasion of privacy" 🤡🤡??

I fully endorse in-depth cyber research into any dude you are speaking to - even if you have literally just been talking to them for 5 minutes on Tinder. Why the hell wouldn't you?? You can find out they're pornsick, politically misaligned, still married, got divorced yesterday, has no life outside of anime, whatever, in about 5 minutes. Saves soooo much time. I've been on first dates where they've lied to me and I've know because of social media stealthing. Yeah it might be something trivial but still shows their character - no thanks, bye. All potential employers do it and they often do it to us, too. Imo Anyone who does not invest 5 minutes into looking at your profile clearly does not give a shit about who you are as a person.

The narrative around this being bad is projection anyway - once I was getting these weird texts from a guy I didn't know, searched the number on fb and discovered it was a NV scrote I worked with (he got my number from the contact book). When confronted he said I was creepy for doing that and tried to get all the men around to agree with him 🤣 ridiculous

Emergency-Feed8216 · 2021-03-20T15:07:37+00:00

I'm friendly with a veteran PI. We sometimes hang out and talk politics and environmental stuff over coffee. If I'm ever concerned about anyone my daughter dates in the future or if friends were concerned for their daughters, I'd call the sleuth.

Worldly_Sell · 2021-03-20T18:18:01+00:00

Any of you ladies know of any websites I can you use to search people beside truthfinder? You can send me a private message if you want.

I kept getting this nagging feeling this guy was a creep but ignored my instinct. Before I slept with him I decided to go full stalker mode and it paid off. Turns out, I wasn’t able to find him via google because he gave me a false last name and he had a charge for lewd acts with a minor.

Free game: If you can’t find basic info via google, it might be because he’s lying about his identity

n3rdgir7 · 2021-03-20T18:13:05+00:00

Somebody needs to make something like Yelp but for men

WildTenderness · 2021-03-20T15:51:45+00:00

More than anything I wish she could do more to save other women. Hopefully reporting actually leads to something 😞

hurhah · 2021-03-20T17:48:54+00:00

I never show up for an app date unless I was first able to do a basic verify/vet with an internet search.

PasDeTout · 2021-03-20T20:04:44+00:00

Do image searches on photos too to make sure they’re not stolen from someone else. So many catfish.

Opening_Candidate471 · 2021-03-20T19:30:04+00:00

THIS. This is why, when a guy says he has ZERO social media, it is a red flag for me. You either are not connected to the world in a way that most are, you are hiding something, or you're on 4chan or whatever saying vile things.

It's strange to not have social media and I avoid those that say they don't even have a shell of a Facebook profile. No Facebook = rapist as far as I'm concerned.

waddamelone · 2021-03-20T19:58:12+00:00

ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS do this!

Unfortunately I don’t know if there’s actual backgroundcheck-websites here in Europe. If there are I would definitely make use of them. But I always look for them on social media. I try to find their family/friends and see what kind of vibe they give off on the social media they THINK I don’t know about.

See if they/their family are racist, is he a women-hater, does he find belittleling (?) people normal etc etc. I would hate for a guy to act like he’s interested in me and miss the information of him being a racist because he’s so good in acting as if he’s not. I for example NEED to know if they participate in celebrating “black pete” which is a racist blackface figure here. Most people (women or men) act as if they’re against it but they’re secretly not.

Anyways. I would love to hear if someone knows how to do some serious background checks in Europe.

quasarbar · 2021-03-20T23:06:31+00:00

I met a guy online that I was really interested in at first, but I googled his screen name and he used the same handle everywhere. (It was unique enough I was confident it was him, plus he had the same writing style and focused his attention on a lot of the same things I already knew were important to him.)

Hoo boy, indeed!

He spewed vitriol at random women online for no reason. And only women.

I also found out he'd lied to me about a few things, including his age. At first I thought it was a typo on one site or the other when his profile elsewhere had his age as ten years older than it was on the dating site. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. But when I called him out on it, nope, it wasn't a typo, it was a deliberate lie because he thought he was entitled to a younger woman.

LockLimePie · 2021-03-20T22:03:12+00:00

Males like this are dangerous. They can put on a grand old show when they are attempting to win your trust, but always remember that it is just a show. They can be vile monsters underneath even the best HVM charade, but most of them can't keep that up for long, and will start letting it slip how shit and misogynistic they are (ie statements about "most girls" -- red flag!!)

Title	Reminder: Do background checks before dates!
Author	charizardine
Upvotes	1181
Comments	55
Date	March 20, 2021 1:20 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/m96x6a/reminder_do_background_checks_before_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/reminder-do-background-checks-before-dates.1190303 https://theredarchive.com/post/1190303

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