the normalization of negative views on the relationship between men and women.

AngeAware · 2025-02-22T05:33:58+00:00

The internet fosters pessimism and negative views of literally everything. I had no idea so many people vehemently despised women, men, kids, pets, cars, Taylor Swift, being alive, you name it, until I came to Reddit.

leosandlattes · 2025-02-22T04:24:20+00:00

You are on a debate subreddit where men's and women's dating strategies are generally seen as adversarial to one another. That each side wants to maximize their benefit while also sacrificing as little of their own time, effort, or investment as possible.

I think the reason these narratives about gender exist is because most men and women probably aren't that great at carrying out relationships. I have absolutely zero data to back that up, so this is my own personal vibes and conjecture only. It just feels that way when I look outside of my social circle (most of us partnered up in our early or mid 20s and are either married now or heading toward it).

awakening_7600 · 2025-02-22T09:02:29+00:00

It's cool to hate on men because feminism believes they are undoing a human long stride against "patriarchy". That includes relationships.

Purple_Cruncher_123 · 2025-02-22T05:37:20+00:00

Have you also been seeing a rise in discussion of toxic familial relationships? I don't think it's just dating. People be cutting off family members left and right, where in the past they'd begrudgingly tolerate that weird uncle or overly catty aunt at family functions.

It's increasingly normalized in part because we've become better at speaking out against undesirable elements of any relationship. Naturally, that invites people to speak out - and people often complain most loudly when things are going wrong. You won't find me saying negative things about my wife these days, but you almost certainly would have heard about my exes back in undergrad for example. This also of course invites people who speak negatively even when the situation is at least half their fault. Negativity is cheap and it engages people.

Reminds me of that one book quote: "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."

SulSulSimmer101 · 2025-02-22T08:46:37+00:00

There is a social break down in community, family and overall society.

A lot of these issues have always been a problem but they were extremely exacerbated by the pandemic and social distancing. So now you have a bunch of 20 somethings who lost their early 20s or came of age in their early 20s and lost prime ages for socializing.

Bc all the 3rd spaces either ran out of business, or they cost too much in an age where inflation is high and people don't have much time outside of work and or school.

We've become more isolated from each other and addicted to our phones.

But also (like someone said) men and women have different romantic/sexual goals and they were always going to be adversarial.

Now you add this in the age of algorithms tailoring the worst of humanity to you bc you stopped a 3 secs longer than you should have at some misogynistic video or a woman saying something extreme about dating expectations and now your whole entire fyp is just dating and romance or sex discourse. This is not good in an age where people are addicted to their phones. And have 1738 social media sites.

Even I took a 1 month break and deleted and deactivated all my social media for the new year just as a resolution for myself. But also I take periodic breaks for like 2 or 3 months.

A lot of the men in here and some women would do good to literally just delete the apps. All of them. Find literally anything else to do. Besides picking up your phone.

harmonica2 · 2025-02-22T11:59:55+00:00

I don't understand how TRP is unrealistic or bad, In the sense that it teaches you how to be more attractive to the opposite gender In terms of exercise, personality, income, so isn't that a good thing?

Plus I have a long-term girlfriend now and it's the best relationship , I've had by a long shot.

TongueTiedPDX · 2025-02-22T21:54:45+00:00

You don’t understand why people in DEBATES have different opinions...

You don’t understand why you aren’t “welcomed” for saying that you’re “bothered in a deep way” by someone having a position in a DEBATE...

What are you doing participating in these debates in the first place, if you can’t handle the premise?

Tywinlol2 · 2025-02-22T05:17:14+00:00

We live in early stages of declining society and are at the point when key social bonds are breaking down. Females understand, I think, their privileged position is coming to an end and lashing out more then usual at men they abuse seeking to prolong a system that puts them on top. After all it is common to hate and fear those you exploit.

OrganicAd5450 · 2025-02-22T04:26:23+00:00

It's a recent phenomenon. It began with the #MeToo movement where society made it easier to for women to accused men of all sorts of things. It exposed some very bad men and trashed lots of good men for no reason. This fueled the men's right movement/red pill. There is more to it but thats it in a nutshell. But now Zoomers have been raised on gender wars and the conviction that this that this is reality, while it's just some absurd phase in human history. It will pass, but hopefully without doing too much damage.

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Outside_Memory5703 · 2025-02-22T12:40:01+00:00

If it bleeds, it leads.

Aka, only the bad and unusual gets attention

Boring, stable normalcy does not

InterestingDiamond35 · 2025-02-23T00:05:10+00:00

Same reason racism was once normalized. They used to say the exact same thing about black people. "Black people are violent, they commit crimes, look at stats, blah blah blah" That kind of bigotry used to be ok to say out loud too. Now it isn't, but sexism is still in. So those women are just the same as those racist bigots of the old days.

Jetpine9 · 2025-02-23T04:37:15+00:00

Because long term relationships are difficult with few exceptions. Most people now don't want to sacrifice as much as people did in the past. Now, people cherish their freedom, individuality, independence, and ultimately, their happiness.

And that all is fine. The problem arises when people don't own it. They don't recognize it in their own psychological make-up, so they project negativity outward onto their partner, and blame their partner for all manner of neglect and so on.

Ultimately, we live in a time when individuality is prized, and women should be free to leave a relationship when they want. And men, also, should feel free to leave a relationship whenever they want, for any reason or for no reason at all, and not be scapegoated for it. We are all free to come or go.

Kurkzer · 2025-02-22T05:46:35+00:00

Society encouraged women to view every petty grievance as a reason to destroy a relationship.

Sharp_Engineering379 · 2025-02-22T15:24:35+00:00

Two reasons. The first is that women are subjected to male appraisal and sexual scrutiny and predation since they are young children.

The second is that men are universally convinced that women exist for men and at men rather than for their own agendas and happiness.

You’d have to spend your lifetime under constant scrutiny and sexual aggression to truly understand.

Ylduts · 2025-02-22T06:58:09+00:00

Western women have been equal under the law for many decades. Privilege is what many are arguing for, it’s clear as day.

Present-Afternoon-70 · 2025-02-22T08:22:21+00:00

We have generally dont feel the need to protect groups in systemic power. Just like we can shit on the rich or people with European ancestry as long as it is viewed as punching up its generally deemed okay.

Specifically with gender we have had a narrative that men were functionally sociopathic in the past. Its a bias reading of history paired with a propaganda tactic that makes it easier for people today to feel morally superior even if not true. Foot binding is a human rights violation but during the time it was done the reasons werent to make women more dependent on men it was to highlight wealth, women got the vote only about 60 years after men not because men wanted control but because men traded their lives for it. Women were barred from the military not because they were weak but because if too many women die it hurts the ability to have more kids, no kids means no country. Saftey feels like oppression when the danger isnt clear should be as much a talking point as the equality feels like oppression when youre no longer the only one at the top.

Pair those with the real harms women have been vocal about while men have been silent you get the modern discourse.

SnooCats37 · 2025-02-22T13:29:05+00:00

No one is saying it is all men but 97% of women have been sexually assaulted or raped by a man. 1 in 3 girls are sexually assaulted or raped. The majority of teen pregnancies, the father is a full grown man not another teenager.

These aren’t negative views on men, these are facts about what is happening to women and girls.

It turns into “debates” when people try down play this or start it with “well it’s not all men”. We know that already. Men listen to men more than they listen to women and women need men to be standing up against violence against women along side women. We need men to call out their friends when they behaving creepily towards women. We need to normalise ostracising the family members who are behaving in a predatory way towards the women and children in the family. We need to normalise calling out dangerous behaviour when we see it

alwaysright0 · 2025-02-22T12:16:55+00:00

So when you say the normalisation of negative views on the relationship between men and women, you really mean why do women view men negatively? Or why will they not shut up about why they view men negatively?

Clean-Luck6428 · 2025-02-22T22:28:03+00:00

Men and women who are shit at relationships cope by being sexist

Title	the normalization of negative views on the relationship between men and women.
Author	itarusuke
Upvotes	6
Comments	80
Date	February 22, 2025 3:36 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1iv9m52/the_normalization_of_negative_views_on_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-normalization-of-negative-views-on-the.1544566 https://theredarchive.com/post/1544566

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