A few months ago I decided to try something new in my life: to abstain from dating any girls for a while and to see what will happen.

Like most men - from a very young age - the chase/seducing/meeting new girls and maintaining current ones were the main focus of my life. Sure I had other things going on but also those things - like going to the gym/making money/places I lived - all of those were also close linked to me meeting girls and becoming better at it.

From pure biological view point it makes perfect sense - our genes main purpose during life is to reproduce themselves as much as possible.

This is why when you get a girl and end up having sex/having a good time with her - there Is a small (and very fleeting) pleasure that reward you for your time and trouble.

The nature of that pleasure (the genes are smart) Is to fleet quickly so you will seek it again and again and by that spreading your genes more and more.

And this is how we get stuck in this maze of constantly seeking for the "cheese" at the end of the maze again and again and again.

But if we choose to stop for a second and look at this process - we discover that the amount of actual pleasure and happiness we are getting from this blind process is much smaller then all the suffering/pain/stress that this is causing us.

it's like digging up an endless hole in the ground seeking a treasure we will never find.

With this understanding - I have looked at life and realized that the chase just doesn't make sense if I want to live a life of joy and happiness.

so I deleted my tinder, stoped looking at girls at public seeking their attention, talking to them, chasing them , etc etc, and basically just started doing my own shit and to see what will happen.

results? stress levels went down, anxiety went down - happiness went up, inner core became stronger.

Does that mean I am going to abstain from dating girls for the rest of my life? probably not. but it certainly takes the pressure, importance and sense of urgency out of it.