45yo single mom smashed the wall hard. This should be a good scarecrow to our lurkers

AlinYBN1 · 2021-09-18T13:17:22+00:00

Words that fall into deaf ears, scattered by the winds of time.

They will never listen, learn or understand the truth behind these words.

Like with almost anything else, you see the problems that you avoided your whole life in front of you only when it's too late do do anything about them.

IoSonCalaf · 2021-09-18T14:05:34+00:00

If her children don’t call her unless they need something then that’s most likely her fault. I don’t call my parents or even visit them anymore (unless it’s something like a death in the family, etc) because they were awful parents. They were abusive and they both took their deep-rooted psychological problems out on me.

The people I know who call their parents and like to spend time with them had loving, caring parents who were good to them.

SquirtBurt · 2021-09-18T14:01:57+00:00

Sits at home all day screwing around on her phone, watching TV, eating garbage.... “Why doesn’t Chad Unconditional Love Thundercock show up on my doorstep?”

Overkillengine · 2021-09-18T13:56:43+00:00

Unconditional love

No such thing. Some conditions are just easier to satisfy than others.

But even so, fail to satisfy them and watch the love wither away like an unwatered plant.

Edit: I'm betting there is a reason her marriage was so short.

houseforever · 2021-09-18T14:05:26+00:00

You run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. You run into assholes all day, you're the asshole. If she have run into assholes for 45 years and everything is others fault, she must have some serious problems.

vegasbadboy702 · 2021-09-18T13:34:16+00:00

Wow married for a whole 8 months. Way to give it the old college try. She found someone to marry her after she already had the children (and I’m gonna guess probably by different fathers) and could only stay married less than a year. No real accountability in her post as to doing things out of order. Well at least she can play with her cats.

VeganKetoMan · 2021-09-18T13:36:02+00:00

The good ol’ wall never fails to shatter all the delusions women build up during their epiphany phase. At 45 this one hit the wall quite some time ago and is most likely on antidepressants now, just like so many other post wall women her age

throwsFatalException · 2021-09-18T14:11:44+00:00

I feel like most women think this will not happen to them. I'm sure she thought the same thing too. It seems like this woman has a whole lot of things about herself she needs to fix before worrying about getting a man though. But when all you do is work, watch TV and play games on your phone, you are probably not motivated to do any self improvement.

SquirtBurt · 2021-09-18T15:44:47+00:00

Whenever someone claims they attempted suicide, I always think of this old Seinfeld joke.

“The thing I don't understand about the suicide person is the people who try to commit suicide, for some reason they don't die, and that's it. They stop trying. Why don't they just keep trying? What's changed? Is their life any better now? No. In fact. it's worse, because now they've found out here's one more thing you stink at. And that's why these people don't succeed in life to begin with. They give up too easy. I say, pills don't work? Try a rope. Car won't start in the garage? Get a tune-up. There's nothing more rewarding than reaching a goal you've set for yourself.”

molded_bread · 2021-09-18T13:59:38+00:00

As Celine Dion sang in her song "All By Myself".

"When I was young I never needed anyone And making love was just for fun Those days are gone

Living alone I think of all the friends I've known But when I dial the telephone Nobody's home

All by myself Don't wanna be All by myself Anymore

Hard to be sure Sometimes I feel so insecure And loves so distant and obscure Remains the cure

All by myself Don't wanna be All by myself Anymore"

Whenever i come to this sub this song always comes to mind. It hits very close to home for these women. Thank you Celine Dion.

YesYesYesVeryGood · 2021-09-18T14:39:08+00:00

To have unconditional love, she must set an unconditional life. She has:

Children
a disability
Active relationship with ex (probably involved with ex for child support)
suicidal

There will always be conditions. She should settle for someone with similar circumstances so they both can be on the same level.

anykah_badu · 2021-09-18T15:46:46+00:00

Depressed vulnerable narcissist. 100%

I've met women like this in real life. One was at the clinic where I recovered for 4 weeks from surgery with a dozen of other women, all going through the same thing.

Great clinic, busy schedule, we were all grateful for the staff and amenities (all paid for by our healthcare providers!), supporting each other and forming lasting friendships. Then she showed up. We called her "the cloud" because she would hang over every conversation like a dark cloud

We tried to integrate her into the group at first but it was impossible. She complained about everything, insulted the staff, and sucked all the happiness from the room with her attention seeking graphic stories about suicide and injury

She was the reason I had to take ear plugs to relaxation treatments in case she gets one at the same time, whining and moaning FOR NO REASON other than her severe personality disorder

Everyone turns away from people like that because they are negative all the time, appreciate nothing, always act like they're the victim etc

Every single statement this poster made is a telltale sign of this particular condition. They sound exactly like that (that is the toned down version they'd give internet strangers of course, you wouldn't wanna encounter them in any other context in real life)

Because of their negative effect on others, my sympathy for these people is pretty much zero. They cannot be helped anyway, and should be cut off by family members and kept away from healthcare facilities. Give them individual care if you must. Like no one should have to interact with them who doesn't get paid for it bwahaha

Aronacus · 2021-09-18T14:33:07+00:00

I wonder why her marriage ended? Who filed? Statistics say 80% it was her.

TryLambda · 2021-09-18T14:15:24+00:00

This should be posted on every instagram and only fans page for women, as reminder that every single one of them has a use by date.

krissfedora · 2021-09-18T15:20:27+00:00

Life is analog. There has to be a continuity in the curve. You can't be a whore in your 20s and magically transform into a family woman.

And no, it is not the wall slamming physically. The psychological wall slamming where she couldn't seem to get excited about anything and for anyone.

When we said sexual discipline is vital, we got called as Incels. Look where they are now. It could have been a decent life: man and woman, a kid or two. They ruined it.

I know the traditional sense of meaning to my life through a family is done with. It's fine. Been dealing with loneliness all my 20s and early 30s. I can handle it for the rest of my life.

AtomicMGTOW · 2021-09-18T14:34:03+00:00

How much you wanna bet her reason for disability is anxiety and fibromyalgia. I'll bet my left nut.

She's spent her whole life in masculine energy just trying to check boxes and hit goals like get married, have babies. However she wanted get married not BE married.

littlestminks · 2021-09-18T16:25:22+00:00

Unconditional love? Just get a dog or something lol.

Life is what you make it… this woman sounds like she has an awful mindset, probably due to depression or something like that. Tbh I don’t really believe in depression or anxiety that much. I experience both of these things from postpartum but I do something about them so that they become feelings, not long term states of being. People who do nothing about it become truly depressed and at that point it’s their fault. Going for a walk is free. Fresh air is free. Ranting on the internet to strangers is even free.

Her daily life doesn’t sound much different from mine and I’m in my 20s. I stay at home, entertain the baby and dog, watch some tv, chores, games/Reddit then good night. Every day. Also I broke my hip from running almost 10 years ago so shit I’m in pain a lot too. Still I run and if it hurts that day, walk. I still lift for gods sake. This lady is doing absolutely nothing then complaining she has absolutely nothing. Life is what you make it lady

MGTOWManofMystery · 2021-09-18T14:27:54+00:00

She could find meaningful work like men do.

molineskytown · 2021-09-18T22:06:54+00:00

Look, this is in no way amusing, and I'm certainly not trying to gloat. But if you're a lady lurker to this sub please understand. Life for women starts out easy and gets hard through the years. For men, it starts out hard and gets easy.

I sincerely want women to be happy. Sincerely. But to do that, y'all got to make smart choices.

rhetorik_ · 2021-09-18T14:11:26+00:00

Those cats will eventually be consuming the face of her cold withered corpse.

GrannyLesbian · 2021-09-18T16:00:00+00:00

I don't understand why she is so sad? She is a strong single independent woman who has children who love her. She needs to surround herself with other single mothers and form a community like Golden Girls so they can all depend on each other.

Dead_Art · 2021-09-18T15:29:32+00:00

My mother doesn’t contact me unless she wants something, Dad on the other hand I see four or five days a week just to shoot the shit about the news and family. If I were to try to do the same with her she’d tell me she’s busy or tell me my opinion is wrong and not to question how or why

biccat · 2021-09-18T14:55:22+00:00

I've waited my entire life for unconditional love and to feel wanted

She thinks that life is just something that happens to her. If it doesn't just happen, then the universe is at fault. It can't be her fault.

Life doesn't give you everything you want. It takes effort, struggle, and sacrifice to get what you want.

Men know this. Life doesn't just happen. Consequences are the results of our actions - both for good and bad. If we want to achieve a goal then we do something about it.

It's been said many times: Women are human beings. Men are human doings.

AmbitiousHornet · 2021-09-18T16:26:38+00:00

I could never love a woman unconditionally.

OwenWentFullMGTOW · 2021-09-18T16:33:31+00:00

I guess nobody told her that being Chad's fuck toy wouldn't bring personal fulfillment.

alldaycray · 2021-09-18T16:45:28+00:00

Haha and for men it's always be yourself. Everyone has their soul mate just be patient.

Mmhmm this is what happens when both men and women are told to be patient to find a partner.

Everybody is waiting to be found and no one is doing the looking.

goldendragonclaw · 2021-09-18T15:03:03+00:00

Being single is the least of her problems. I would not want to be invited to this pity party.

newyorkloser45 · 2021-09-18T23:25:49+00:00

Give her a day as an ugly male and she'd kill herself faster than it takes for her to get to chad's place after he texts "dtf?"

InevitableOwl1 · 2021-09-18T14:26:31+00:00

This is sad but I wonder if there she was ever willing to hear more than just “bullshit platitudes”. Because the truth is hard

SmallHandsMallMindS · 2021-09-18T15:59:35+00:00

the 'things will get better' crowd are epic trolls

HungryBrain1 · 2021-09-18T16:10:06+00:00

Sounds like a classic untreated depressive. Nobody wants to be around someone who’s miserable.

Aqui1am_ · 2021-09-18T18:49:52+00:00

“I’ve waited my entire life for unconditional love”

Men are never loved unconditionally.

She’s “disabled” but doesn’t sound like she’s doing anything to help better her own situation.

GentleHawk1 · 2021-09-18T19:02:10+00:00

Enjoy the other 45 years ahead.

Just keep your thinking high and keep a positive mindset.

It is never late to restart. Start by organizing your room.

reignoferror00 · 2021-09-18T20:09:27+00:00

One telling omission - 1 husband, married 8 months, 3 kids. Do the math. Either likely 2 kids out of wedlock with the husband (doubtful) or 2 or 3 men she is making no real comments about that likely reflect badly on her. Guessing she married the one guy when she got knocked up for reason$.

A telling word "I've waited my entire life for unconditional love and to feel wanted." Waited; nothing active, nothing she has worked towards, just waited. Just like she waited for so long for things to get better; looks like her fairy godmother forgot to show up and tap her with a wand.

tradsouthernmale · 2021-09-18T22:14:35+00:00

News Flash: your life ain't getting any better. It's only getting worse.

CatRelocator · 2021-09-18T15:26:22+00:00

Honestly very sad

Wildhouse83 · 2021-09-18T16:33:11+00:00

And here comes the bad news: She still has almost another 40 years to go.

Sufficient_Winter_45 · 2021-09-18T22:19:05+00:00

How the hell do you raise children so they only call when they need something?

DarkDoomDoom · 2021-09-18T15:13:45+00:00

I feel pity for her, I think it’s doesn’t fit the sub she’s not complaining about where are all the good men

southerncraftgurl · 2021-09-18T18:08:36+00:00

My God was this a dating profile??

slipkid223 · 2021-09-18T17:19:25+00:00

She is giving you fair warning; she has been chasing Chads and is mentally unstable. At 45 she is only going to get worse.

Heed the warning the gents.

Joaquino7997 · 2021-09-18T19:46:36+00:00

I hear this story often, and in my personal life it's always a woman and she has serious mental issues. This physically-disabled divorced mother attempted suicide and can't seem to figure out why her own children don't want to be around her, much less other people...?!?!?!?!

If all these people are walking away from her, then she is clearly the problem.

I wonder if one of those "bullshit platitudes" was to seek professional help.

2021-09-18T20:21:06+00:00

wants unconditional love but will never receive it

I guess she knows what it’s like to be a man now lol

kidruhil · 2021-09-18T20:25:32+00:00

Choices have consequences. Zero Fucks Given over here for that sluts pity party

Bob_and_Virginia · 2021-09-18T22:34:32+00:00

"Unconditional love"?! 😲 Oh honey, somebody should have told you! There's no such thing!

peguy2000 · 2021-09-18T17:58:16+00:00

Could be my mother. My mother walked out of my parents marriage when her blackmailing and cheating were succesfully done. Shes in her late 50s now and it seens like her family also doesnt talk to her anymore. I honestly feel sorry for her but shes burned the bridges all by herself. I wish i could fix things but its up to her

MAFiA_79 · 2021-09-18T23:46:28+00:00

Men can grow. Women always sink.

You can't be the best version of yourself when you are a couch potato playing games and watching TV. Grow the f up.

2021-09-19T00:48:48+00:00

"Everyone I have ever had in my life has told me "things will get better."

Yeah, sure... More like, I cut everybody who has ever said anything remotely critical of my behavior out of my life, and the only people who remained were just trying to appease me/get me to stop bitching about my life.

Hunk_Maggot · 2021-09-19T01:10:01+00:00

The few people i had in my life decided to walk away.

No wonder why the child will do the same in the future, no man wants a drama in his life.

I've waited my entire life for unconditional love.

Unconditional love are for parents to their respective biological childrens, not for an grow ass adult who wants to be loved like a child. This much says that she didn't have the love of her dad in her life.

coloradocaniac · 2021-09-19T03:59:35+00:00

There's a part of me who'll always want kids.

With how selfish and self-absorbed the world is, I think it's for the best I didn't, and since I come from a place of often severe depression all I can say is it really opens your eyes to who really cares about you.

I have more "friends" than I could count who are sunshine friends, only there when I'm in a good place and want good times. Moonlight friends, the ones to light your way when life is at its darkest, are so seemingly rare and personally have been so rare that I've begun wondering if I've ever had a real friend.

While I sympathize with feeling like no one in the world cares about you, at least this person got to have kids. Maybe celebrate that.

soonershooter · 2021-09-19T04:16:48+00:00

While a social trainwreck for sure, this lady also has serious mental issues that require massive mental health intervention, no man on this planet can fix her. There is a reason that everyone in her life leaves her after some point in time.

NoNameAvailableSee · 2021-09-18T15:24:54+00:00

Put that woman on suicide watch before she hits menopause.

MissiveGhost · 2021-09-18T18:02:40+00:00

27 years lol

braucifur · 2021-09-18T18:21:46+00:00

Yup her life situation is just something that happened to her that she watched passively she had nothing to do with her current predicament whatsoever.

kgm123 · 2021-09-19T04:05:49+00:00

At least she has a cat. That’s a positive

DISHONORU-TDA · 2021-09-18T18:29:45+00:00

Soon: Nobody else to blame. . . already tried the attempt for attention. . . why is the world wrong and why am i so right? :((((

Harry_Teak · 2021-09-18T22:16:32+00:00

I am so moved by this sad tale that I was going to write a poem about her life but I can't for the life of me come up with anything that rhymes with "morbid obesity."

RolandDelacroix · 2021-09-18T23:21:54+00:00

Based on the response of the people around her, it does sound as if her relationships were indeed all one-sided.

Miggymoggy · 2021-09-19T09:53:31+00:00

You reap what you sow and these women have had opportunity after opportunity to have the most amazing wonderful men as partners but do these women want such men? Absolutely not, so when they get older and start to cry, complain etc. It is 100% their fault and the blame can only be put onto them.

Unlike most men, women are so incredibly blessed early on in life but they squander it in search of things that do not even exist (or maybe in a Disney movie).

Old_snowboarder · 2021-09-19T11:19:00+00:00

The question I always want to ask it 'so what percentage of this fuckup is down to you' - it's a question most people wouldn't appreciate being asked.

waveformcollapse · 2021-09-18T23:21:32+00:00

I am sick of these bullshit platitudes.

ForsakeHope-BeStill · 2021-09-19T00:47:57+00:00

Is she disabled because it was the remnant effect of her suicide?

PopularBug5 · 2021-09-19T04:00:21+00:00

I get up, play with my cats, watch TV, play games on my phone, go to bed, repeat.

How about taking up meaningful hobbies instead? One that involves you stepping out of the house (GASP!), mingle with others who are not your family (GASP!) and contribute to the community (HOLY SHIT!)

Aldabruzzo · 2021-09-20T13:37:57+00:00

Dear 45 year old woman

this happened because

1) You blame everyone else for your problems. You will not take responsibility for your own problems.

2) You are a terrible mother.

3) You did not spend your life "loving and giving". you spent your life taking and getting railed by Chads and Tyrones.

"Play with my cats"

45 years old, single mother, divorcee, alone.

You cannot make this shit up.

AggressiveProblem654 · 2021-09-21T04:15:43+00:00

oh well!

niks2592 · 2021-09-21T14:20:23+00:00

Kinda feel bad for her, but this is her doing, so it's justice.

Vikingbeard1 · 2021-09-22T03:30:29+00:00

Sounds exactly like my former sister-in-law; roped my brother in (whom she had "totally loved since we were teenagers) while he was recovering from a bad breakup, seemed decent at first and really worked to join our family, but eventually made everyone of us dislike being around her, because it's a never-ending litany of complaints, excuses, whining, physical health problems, mental health problems, bitching about all the other people who left her life over her bitching, etc. The only one who still likes her is my brother...whom she divorced, and he's an idiot who has had ALL the Kool-Aid from CNN, is broke, and basically scrapes by doing odd jobs, so his endorsement is the opposite of reassuring to anyone who knows him. They only have one kid, but that kid is currently with my brother because she's fucking homeless (moved in with some guy she met on Tinder, WITH HER DAUGHTER THE STUPID CUNT, and was shocked when he got bored of her fast ass in 2 months and threw her out). No one has ever even tried to tell her the truth, as far as I know, but it doesn't matter, she just thinks we all conspired to hate her and ruin her reputation with person after person. Depressingly, I have tried getting my brother to see, but he literally thinks a $100/hour minimum wage would instantly lead to global wealth and prosperity, so of course he doesn't understand why his ex is insufferable.

monkeybrains13 · 2021-09-24T08:49:44+00:00

So sad. I hope this never happens to me

Existenceizfutile · 2021-09-19T07:27:38+00:00

I feel bad for her. It's nearly impossible for women with children to find a new partner. We have no indication that this situation is her fault, and not bad luck plus depression.

gfgdhj5784yu8 · 2021-09-20T01:15:40+00:00

They always think their early twenties will last forever. Those carousel rides can last a long time but when they end, they end abruptly.

SladeWilsonXL9 · 2021-09-24T16:50:02+00:00

Those fools on FDS need to read this and learn.

PhantomCowboy · 2021-09-25T12:15:20+00:00

time is the fire in which we burn

20210527 · 2021-09-28T01:55:44+00:00

Is this a dating profile, or a search for a therapist?

Hard pass

YesYesYesVeryGood · 2021-10-11T02:58:33+00:00

She lives in a house, has food, and has the means to educate herself online. She's better than most of the people on Earth.

vanillapopsicle · 2021-10-29T08:28:24+00:00

Just kinda sad, have compassion for these people.

juulboixd · 2021-09-21T19:30:09+00:00

y'all fail to realize it's not ab the situation someone is in it's how they feel in that situations. don't compare yourself n try to understand someone's situation because u NEVER will. try to understand their emotions and what situation in your life would make u feel their same emotion. TWO different things. not everyone handles the same situation the same way

Title	45yo single mom smashed the wall hard. This should be a good scarecrow to our lurkers
Author	Marfi09
Upvotes	552
Comments	243
Date	September 18, 2021 1:09 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/pqm55r/45yo_single_mom_smashed_the_wall_hard_this_should/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/45yo-single-mom-smashed-the-wall-hard-this-should.1075761 https://theredarchive.com/post/1075761

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