[deleted by user]

BurnItDownSR · 2021-09-24T16:15:01+00:00

I appreciate you bringing this up. Most guys don't even consider their own safety when they have an opportunity to get laid.

Fluffy_Risk9955 · 2021-09-24T18:37:37+00:00

There’s a book called dangerous personalities. It has checklists for each personality to spot him or her. Memorize them. Next time listen to your gut feeling and verify it against the checklists.

richietherich92 · 2021-09-24T19:41:15+00:00

I go to bars/clubs solo all the time and honestly, my best advice is to trust your gut. Your natural instincts will save you more often than not.

If you do decide to go home with her, make sure to have a buddy know where you're at just in case and always have an exit plan. It's always better to be the one driving, since you have the freedom to leave whenever, but that may not always be an option when going out. If you're not driving, make sure to have the uber app ready to go so you can dip if you're not feeling the vibe.

If you're going to her place, make sure to be very observant of the area as you're approaching so you can spot any potential ambushes. When you enter, be sure to take a good look inside and look for potential exit points in case things go south and she whips out a knife to kill you.

Statistically speaking though, it's unlikely that a woman would try to harm you. In fact, she might be thinking the same thing as you. Good luck man and remember to have fun!

LifesMysteries0 · 2021-09-25T00:51:24+00:00

I use to take a selfie, with the guy, outside his place, showing address and a pic of the plate in his car and would send to BFF and cloud storage. No man refused that pic

mminsfin · 2021-09-24T15:55:05+00:00

Get their socials, phone number, name etc. If you're concerned, make sure they're a real person first and then if anything send that to your friends.

Girls will do this far more often but by taking a pic, sending their Facebook info, share location etc with a trusted friend so they can check in. Should anything happen they've got a trail and if nothing else you're being cautious. I don't think a stranger would find that weird and if anything makes for a cute joking conversation. "Hey can I take your picture? / get your social media? I need to make sure you aren't gonna take advantage of me"

norwegiandoggo · 2021-09-24T15:10:35+00:00

It's a case to case evaluation. I know you don't have much time to get to know someone in a club setting, so you have to make that decision on imperfect information. If I get a feeling a person is safe I can go with them. If I feel uncomfortable, that something "feels off" (can't describe it. It's more of a gut reaction that she's not behaving normally), then I would back out. It also depends on the overall cultural setting. In safer countries I would feel more secure than some back ally club in Venezuela. I would also evaluate her intoxication levels. Drunk girls are a no-go for one night stands for me personally.

Woujo · 2021-09-25T02:04:33+00:00

I have had more than a 100 one night stands, and nothing terrible has happened to me, but I have had a few bad experiences.

- One night I brought home a hooker who robbed me. I didn't know she was a hooker. She sucked my dick and took my credit card after I fell asleep. My mistake is that I should have known something was up because taking her home was too easy.

- I have had a few times where I brought a girl home who was too drunk and she puked everywhere. Obviously I did not do anything with her that night.

- A few times the woman wanted to stay up all night and do cocaine, which I am not into. One night I threatened to call the cops on a girl because she wanted to stay up all night and party with her friend and would not leave.

- One night I brought home two girls and they got into a huge fight, so I had to throw them out of my apartment.

But generally, most of the time it is fine. You just need to have situational awareness. Things to avoid:

- Do not bring home girls that are "ghetto" or "hood." Sorry to be judgmental, but those are the most dangerous ones.

- Be careful what neighborhood you go back to. If a pretty girl lives in the ghetto, that's a bad sign.

- Be wary of things are too easy. If you talk to her for 3 minutes and she wants to go back to her place, it might be a set up.

- Do not go home with any girl who shows any interest in where your money and/or wallet is.

- Be ready to get dressed and run out of there at any moment.

- If there are other people in the house, make sure you ask her who they are and meet them if possible.

- And of course, try to bring her back to your place rather than go to hers.

HughBeaumont500 · 2021-09-25T03:06:20+00:00

Don't people go to "no-tell-motels" anymore?

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-09-24T16:21:51+00:00

Don't drink. Be sharp. Buy your own (soft) drinks. Know exactly what part of town you are in.

willgo-waggins · 2021-09-24T21:52:40+00:00

Always have your radar up.

Don’t get so trashed that you cannot stay rational.

Let someone you trust know where you are going and what your plan is (ie - going hone crashing with friends or possibility of a hook up/overnight).

You really should be doing all this anytime anyway if you are being astute. It’s funny you mention your dad because my 20yo son and I (he lives with me still going to school) have a very frank and open communication. He knows that I will hook up and I know that he will. So we always share at least the basic plan with each other where we are going out alone.

In my personal experience (a LOT I’m a 51m), I have never yet either had any time where I have felt threatened or endangered when I have met a woman and hooked up going to her place. I will almost always go to hers so that 1) she feels more comfortable and 2) she doesn’t know where I live and therefore I cannot be set up if she is in communication with someone else.

I’m in the US (don’t know where you are) so I don’t have really the concerns of organ harvest and some of the more exotic things like kidnapping (if you are well off) or such. I am cognizant of really shitty neighborhoods mostly because I don’t want to get my car busted into or robbed so I have postponed to a future date or just walked if it’s too sketchy seeming.

Hope this all helps and gets you having a good time without being paranoid!

great_account · 2021-09-24T23:10:04+00:00

I'll be honest, it's literally never happened to me. I've had multiple one night stands and brought girls home from the bar. After hearing about what Cardi B used to do to guys, I have thought about it. But not enough to change my behavior.

noogoona · 2021-09-24T18:15:15+00:00

I've never once been worried about this because its extremely implausible.

You're far more like to die in a traffic accident while commuting to work on monday morning.

DakiAge · 2021-09-24T17:26:39+00:00

You can invite her to your house for that night or arrange a date with her for tomorrow.

julz007 · 2021-09-24T23:18:27+00:00

I know a guy who woke up on the hotel's parking lot (he had a room there) without his wallet and all beat up, he only had a couple of beers and he didn't know how he got there. Last thing he remembered is talking to a specific lady at the bar near by.

Guys get targeted just as women do 🤷‍♀️

Unicornlove2599 · 2021-09-25T01:39:06+00:00

I'm honestly a bit afraid, because as a woman it sometimes happens more to us.

2021-09-24T21:19:35+00:00

"One musk risk it for the biscuit." - Plato circa 348 BC

Ensifror · 2021-09-24T16:47:54+00:00

I'm not worried. As a bouncer I have plenty of experience taking care of myself in that regard, and im a big guy so I doubt the kind of petite girls I like would dare try to physically attack me anyway. I guess they could poison me or some shit, but at some point you have to draw the line between caution and paranoia.

Don't follow girls into alleys though. Heard of too many muggings.

AruiMD · 2021-09-24T19:12:58+00:00

Where do you live that this is a legitimate concern? Not saying it doesn't happen but in general guys are not the ones that have to worry about this shit, girls are.

My advice? Worry about it when it happens. You're inexperienced right now so just go to the club, have fun, get better at understanding social dynamics and do some field reports when you get back.

bucketshire · 2021-09-24T21:24:14+00:00

Intuition

Adjustedwell · 2021-09-25T03:11:30+00:00

Depending on where you're located and what area of the city/town you're in this could definitely be an issue. It's easy to write off parents' warnings as being overprotective or overbearing but this could definitely happen. There have been stories where women working with male criminals get a guy to come back to "her place" where they rob him.

If its a university town and the girl is your age and her "Story" checks out then you're probably fine. But, again better safe than sorry.

PrimeTone · 2021-09-25T04:23:46+00:00

Follow the rules of stupid. Don't go stupid places at stupid times to do stupid things with stupid people. Anyone who is planning to lure and rob you will hang out at clubs and bars so you should be aware of the risks. In some countries it's very common that women will lure dumb tourists into getting jumped by multiple attackers. In the US it's somewhat common that you run into crazy people who are willing to do you harm. Anyone holding a knife or a gun can fuck your shit up or kill you, they don't have to know what they're doing or physically overpower you.

CLAPPERSFARGO · 2021-09-24T16:55:58+00:00

Going to bars and clubs solo? What’s your normal “strategy” that allows you to fit in the environment seamlessly without looking creepy?

10000ColdNights · 2021-09-24T19:48:13+00:00

Personally I’m about 6’2” 270 lbs not fat, and I fight like a badger. Usually don’t even consider safety.

doomsday0099 · 2021-09-25T00:11:50+00:00

paranoid about it

tabtal · 2021-09-25T00:35:55+00:00

If you're really concerned about something like this, then you better stop driving to work and wear a helmet when you go down the stairs...

On a serious note, I don't think the likelihood of something like getting drugged and having your organs harvested is a very likely event. If you're smart, you can minimize the risk (of something that's already very unlikely) by not drinking too much, being observant, and taking other precautions like contacting your friends before leaving.

Life is short. Don't be stupid, but don't let paranoia keep you from having a good time.

2021-09-24T18:53:14+00:00

This won’t be an issue for you if you start lifting and do martial arts. Man up and take her to your place

IamWisdom · 2021-09-25T03:04:33+00:00

I would only be concerned about this if the person was sketchy and had tattoos. Otherwise I would fuck her all night and never see her again. But a hell of a night though. A hell of a night.

ReillyDiefenbach · 2021-09-24T14:28:46+00:00

Keep your wits, be prepared to leave at any moment and don’t drink anything until you are comfortable. Recognize red flags. Any woman willing to bring a stranger over is either criminally desperate to get laid or a desperate criminal.

LakersAreTerrible25 · 2021-09-25T02:40:12+00:00

You gotta have the standards women have. In terms of seeing her 2-3 times before bringing her back to your spot or even fucking her. You're the prize, not her and therefore you need to act that way. Dude I've met/fucked some legit dimes at my school (a top 5 school in Canada) who were also fairly intelligent and some still were really off putting when I'd bring them back to my place. They'd be lowkey tryna go through my stuff and act kinda crazy in general. So, if these are supposed to be among the top women, what do you think a chick at a club could potentially do? You just gotta watch out man, all of these chicks are crazy as fuck nowadays

Infinite_Relation_86 · 2021-09-25T07:21:41+00:00

I don’t know, thanks to testosterone I typically assume I have more muscle than her and could overpower her if I ever litterally needed to. On top of it, typically it’s me that suggest we go to her place by asking how far she lives from here. And then being like, want to hang there. So I don’t typically feel like she is trying to drag me somewhere to jump me, I’m typically driving most of the experience.

Fancy_Split_2396 · 2021-09-25T14:15:13+00:00

Depends there is different rules for men who are below or over 6 foot.

Calamity__Bane · 2021-09-24T19:42:25+00:00

No concern whatsoever.

NateHate1402 · 2021-09-24T19:44:01+00:00

This seems massively unlikely and unless the even more unlikely situation of men waiting for you in her apartment I doubt the average women could even land a hit if I didn’t want them to.

skinisblackmetallic · 2021-09-24T23:17:51+00:00

I’m more concerned with someone going off the deep end and the police getting involved.

bobbiesbunions · 2021-09-25T02:03:57+00:00

Ur good

069reasonswhy · 2021-09-25T06:38:58+00:00

ID BE AFRAID OF AIDS, UTI YEAST going with random stranger!

THE_IRL_JESUS · 2021-09-25T07:38:05+00:00

I don't consider it at all. If I die, I die. The approach I take always, with things like this, or drugs etc.

AruiMD · 2021-09-25T07:47:32+00:00

I have never thought about this ever. Where do you live and is it common for men to be robbed, raped, organs harvested, killed?

I don’t think your fathers advice is bad, however.

Only good things can come from waiting, all good things.

Chicagoj1563 · 2021-09-25T08:47:33+00:00

Trust your best judgment and instincts. It’s ok to expect the unexpected and be prepared if something goes down. At the same time, most people are genuine and won’t ever be a danger.
Carry pepper spray.
Look up the fastest way to call emergency services on your phone as each phone has a way to do it.

Basically, just prepare ahead of time and be proactive. With that said, you are more likely to face danger walking in or out of a bar parking lot than from someone trying to con you.

recyclablebanthas · 2021-09-25T10:58:05+00:00

1

If you meet someone new at a club/bar, you are into each other and decide to hookup and their place the same night. How concerned are you they might try to harm you?

Long story short: not. at. all.

People don't really go to the trouble of going along with the whole process of being picked up on just so they can harm someone. Maybe in the movies if someone is dealing with an assassin, but seriously, in real life? No.

Also, part of the process anyone goes through when they pick up on someone should include screening out psychos.

2

I ask this because I as a 22 year old man am going to clubs/bars solo. Since my friends are introverted and I have no one else to go with.

It's no problem going alone. So long as you can find enjoyment in dancing or whatever is going on in the venue, you will be fine. People having fun, are fun to be around.

If you are going there trying to find fun and not having fun yourself, then you have a problem.

Example: If you go to a LAN party to play computer games, you'll get along with people. If someone who hates gaming and PCs goes there, they're going to stand out like a sore thumb.

3

I personally would go with a woman to her place that I just met at a bar/club if we were into each other and wanted to hookup.

There's nothing wrong with that. Just be responsible about the risks involved in STDs. Have condoms to mitigate that and you're doing as well as anyone else is.

4

I would trust that the woman would not try to harm me (ie steal my organs, or have guys in her place trying to rob or kill me etc)

If you are in a dangerous country where this is a real threat, you can do a Google search and find out if there are any advisories. Perhaps in some Latin American or South Asian countries this might be a problem, especially if you look like a rich guy.

But for most people it's not a problem. And if you're paying attention, it's not a problem. Just don't go to scummy places to pick up on girls. To the extent that this is an issue, it's in poorer places in poor countries.

jestercake · 2021-09-25T12:42:17+00:00

Most of the time you will sense if someone is trustworthy or not. But of course, you'll still have to listen to your instinct and not just follow your dick if your gut is telling you to walk away.

Also, if going back to your place is an option, do that. That way you control the environment and you'll be safer.

KittyTittyCommitee · 2021-09-25T12:43:55+00:00

As a woman. I know better.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	192
Comments	129
Date	September 24, 2021 2:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pukrtp/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1275602 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275602

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