Is Pickup Dying?

merchant_of_mirrors · 2025-09-25T03:02:12+00:00

Night life is played out at this point, most people late twenties and older dont really go clubbing much. I find that a much better way to meet women is going to concerts. Everyone is there to have fun, and people tend to be very chatty between sets. Its also perfect for setting up instant dates. Say you chat up a girl at the show and you feel some chemistry. The show ends around 10, well now you can ask her if she'd be down to have a drink with you at the bar next door. if shes feeling you she'll likely say yes since shes already out, and now you're free to escalate the flirting

Sonicmantis · 2025-09-25T03:04:01+00:00

No one can afford to go out anymore

Matter_Still · 2025-09-25T03:27:50+00:00

“Pickup” as you perceive it (RSD, “The Game”, etc.,) has always been a fringe culture. Even Strauss’s publisher described the game’s characters as inhabiting a “hidden, underground seduction lair”.

It eventually was brought into the light of day and exposed to criticism by its defectors who pulled back the curtain on its darker side. National appearances on late night, as well as a reality show, didn’t help the cause. Erik Markovik wearing goggles while being interviewed by Conan O’brien was hard to watch; Jessica Alba politely tolerating Neil Strauss’ ham fisted display of “game”, no less so.

Worse of all was the reality series, which ranks among the most ill-conceived of a long list of ill-conceived reality shows.

The attraction of “The Game” (for those drawn to it) was its urban-legend secrecy and an invitation to enter a shadowy underground where men, like weirdly fascinating nocturnal preditors, lured women into their nests.

That community still thrives among a diminishing number of true believers, like the PTL club, but its glory days had a short shelf life.

No-Dot-7661 · 2025-09-25T05:33:40+00:00

Women still need dick no matter how bad the economy is.

I rarely go out but there's always single women at bars when I go. For me personally I just go extra hard on the apps. I'm always meeting new women from apps and it doesn't take much effort.

Conjoined_Triangles · 2025-09-25T03:36:06+00:00

I somewhat agree that it's dying, but also disagree in some part. There's definitely a vibe shift that happened years ago, the difference is very noticeable comparing 10-15 years ago and going out now. Women still go out to bars and clubs, but the issue is a lot of them don't go with the intention to meet a guy, some are not as attractive, and the ones remaining you'll have to compete with others for her attention.

Lots of PUAs are pushing day game hard because there's no competition and it's easier to get volume of approaches than waiting at a bar. The adaptation I've made is to cold approach at night, it's like day game where you get higher possible volume but also with the higher energy of night game since women are more likely to talk on a night out. Don't stick it out in a single bar or club anymore, you're just going to be disappointed by the lack of volume.

cinammonbear · 2025-09-25T03:28:43+00:00

I’ve found the most eager girls for me this year have been at camping music festivals. The more community focused, the better.

After-Pickle8281 · 2025-09-25T03:01:59+00:00

I went to the night club the other night here in Australia... It was half empty. There were 3 groups of women dancing with their female friends. I tried to dance with some of them and I was rejected. I still can't figure out day game. They are in the situations you mention.

Sherman140824 · 2025-09-25T08:25:38+00:00

I only do day game. It's good for pissing off incels and feminists.

Virtual_Ad_4817 · 2025-09-25T08:39:15+00:00

It really does suck that nightlife is dying. I'm doing pretty well online nonetheless. But nothing compares to nightgame when it's good.

Ft. Lauderdale and Miami are still good for nightgame. I'm in Ft. Laudy right now and there have been hot girls out every weekend. I have no problems finding 8s and 9s+ when I go out.

I'll be in Seattle next weekend and I'm gonna try there, but I'm not getting my hopes up it seems like it sucks.

When I go back to Michigan/Detroit area there are certain specific spots where I can go to meet hot girls consistently. But it's been affected by the COVID nightlife massacre as well.

I have a friend who says Houston right now is really good but I haven't been there to verify myself.

ENTER-D-VOID · 2025-09-25T06:13:58+00:00

only 1 in about 300 women has an online dating profile like tinder. now do 1+1

RedHaze45 · 2025-09-25T03:55:32+00:00

People are being less social and going out is expensive for most people. We live in different times man

New_Banana3858 · 2025-09-25T07:47:09+00:00

I think its because more people are realising that you don't need to go out to a bar to get a woman.

ThatDarnSmell · 2025-09-25T03:04:21+00:00

"PUA" is long dead and for good reason. A small subset of folks come across the old folklore and try to resurrect it, however naive they may be.

As for quality women to date, there's no shortage. Trying to meet people during the day can be really tough as those are standard work hours for most adults. People are busy during the daytime. That obviously doesn't mean everyone, but in general the daytime hours I'm used to seeing housewives and senior citizens outside of lunch hours. Not a ton of young professionals will be wasting time during that timeframe unless they want to lose money.

cs_throwawayyy · 2025-09-25T03:55:29+00:00

Dating apps killed PUA long ago. Girls are exposed to more options, so this cold approach pick up barely works.

Only game left is social circles, and apps. For apps you just need to look good.

barlowaplesand · 2025-09-25T07:05:04+00:00

i think pickup in terms of the community and the belief in 'game' as being some sort of special skill died off somewhat about 5 or 6 years ago

Think of all of the forums and stuff that died off. I used to belong to about 6. Now there's only one of them ones left (sosuave)

And even on sosuave, the 'message' is completely different. The mods used to (stupidly) believe and push the idea taht you can get any girl you want, even if you are old and ugly, as long as you tease adn use pushpull and negs and use some routines and blablabla. NOW the only 'advice' you will see on there, even from the mods and the long term members is 'hit the gym! make more money!. ZERO stuff about lines adn 'tech'

I feel like when youtube infields became popular and we saw so many 'pros' getting rejected despite their 'game' and it becamse so obvious that they only got laid with the girls who were down from the open due to being physically attracted, is when people started to realise the truth

AlastairXXL · 2025-09-25T10:16:51+00:00

Too long, skim read. PUA died when pranksters showed you could go up to a woman without talking offer your phone and get a number not need game her all nite, this is a seduction forum anyway.

Nitelife is changing in Scotland, youngsters go to clubs not bars cos of rising cost of living. hence bars are emptying all together.

Sebastes-aleutianus · 2025-09-25T03:01:09+00:00

What? You dare to tell us about pickup living in that clerical state? The FBI is probably investigating XD

ResentCourtship2099 · 2025-09-25T12:05:41+00:00

Nah it'll probably be here for all eternity whether we like it or not

DopeAFjknotreally · 2025-09-25T14:11:12+00:00

It’s more just integrating with being a normal person who is good at social skills, building a social circle, and in touch with his healthy masculine.

The days of wearing goggles and a space suit and approaching a group of girls saying “I have a question, my friends gf is jealous…” are just kinda dead

Jironasaurus · 2025-09-26T12:26:33+00:00

It won't die. But people do need to adapt. You cannot hope for the environment to stay the same when things change all the time. This is circumstance that's out of your control.

It's the same with how some of you talk about how you're not so much a texter but more of a real-life interaction kinda person, but fail to understand that everyone's maintaining connections via texting these days, and so, that refusal to adapt and learn new skills is what causes you problems.

And like you said, you're not really into the whole "day game" kinda deal. Which is understandable, but if all your other options are removed, you'd eventually have to push yourself out of your comfort zone and do day game or at least some form of it. Instead of resisting, just get out there and master a new skill. That's my 2 cents worth.

ArmitageShanks69 · 2025-09-27T12:50:45+00:00

You are making an ill-informed sweeping generalisation by saying of those methods you mentioned at the start "we all know DO work". Perhaps they work for yourself and others you have spoken to but the truth is that they have not benefited the vast number of people who have tried to follow them. 'Pick-up methods' are not generic to the male species and only benefit those who have a suppressed ability to attract women.

CHINO-HILL · 2025-09-27T15:28:23+00:00

l dont think it is. the vast majority of guys involved in pu are mentally ill, socially awkward, and marginalized. lf you look at the world today, there are a growing number of mentally ill, and marginalized guys. compared to maybe 50yrs ago, people now are less included in their comunities, and this is what is driving men towards pu. lf you were included in your comunity, then you wouldnt need pu. the only time you would is if you were alienated from/by your peers. to me, this trend apears to be growing. l saw pua operating in ny, and fl. as far as night life goes, l still saw huge turn outs at frat parties in indiana as of 2025. nyc also has a big night life scene, but what l noticed is that alot of the female participants to the night life scene are not necesarily there to meet anyone. rather theyre more there just to socialize with people they already know, but that's how it was 20yrs ago too though. alot of people asume that because youre in a public, social setting that people want to be engaged, but most of the time they dont

the way forward is probably house parties, but if you try pu there you might end up never getting invited again. this is why you dont really see too many pua operate out of house parties, but they are much more effective for picking up females if u can somehow manage to pu without being noticed by other participants of the party

also, there are a bunch of pua operating out of tiktok. theyre now known as "riz" to apeal to a younger audience. and one of the guys, erik ronaldo is trying to charge $3k for an online class where he probably doesnt even talk to you. there are also a bunch of other grifters (stefspeaks) doing hidden cameras who are also pointing you in the direction of paying for online courses that will supposedly teach you how to talk to females and "be confident"

ciurana · 2025-09-25T09:39:08+00:00

I believe, and have considered trying to collect some data, that social media and porn are driving men away from pickup/seduction because it takes work on themselves and on social skills. On-line distractions provide instant gratification. Some transfer that instant gratification to real world situations -- they seek sex and companionship with instant gratification.

I live in Pattaya, Thailand, infamous for its red light districts and adult entertainment offerings. The city has a lot more to offer, but like Amsterdam, those who don't know, or don't care, fail to explore it. Many incels, divorcees, various dudes show up here to play two-week millionaire and fall for the fiction that the whores like them. I used to challenge them on-line on why they give so money, energy, etc. to these women, who see these men as disposable and exploitable cucks, and nothing else. The answer from several of them, "because in London/Chicago/wherever-they-came-from I'm invisible, and women like me here, and I can have sex and companionship." At some point they lose the sense of reality and fall for a "meme girlfriend" who has an actual boyfriend or husband, and is screwing them mentally, physically, and economically until they suck them dry. I used to try to invite them to learn pickup, to work on themselves, etc. No interest. It's a lot easier to pay someone and live the fantasy than to put the effort.

I live here with my family. None of us is Thai, we're all expats. A lot of the social and business activity here and in Bangkok revolves around the international/western chambers of commerce. There's always a healthy mix of smart, pretty, educated, and interesting women showing up at the social mixers. We call them hisos for "high society," meaning they're educated and middle class higher, unlike the bar girls. There's always a healthy mix of attractive Thai and foreign women at these events. A couple of friends who were in the transactional sex and companionship bandwagon accepted to join me for these international mixers. One of them saw me connect with three separate 9s, from three separate nationalities (Asian women aren't attractive to me) at each event they came with me. On the most recent one, a tall beautiful girl, who's a lot younger than me, was in our group of 4 (my buddy, another lady, and me) and grabbed my hand, pulled me aside to chat me up, give me her contact info, etc. and to confide some personal stuff. I'd been gaming her for about an hour, hot and cold. My buddy asked me how on earth I manage to pull at least one pretty girl every single time we are at these events, so I offered to teach him game. He's been practicing approaches and working on himself. He'll do great.

I have no plans of pursuing these pretty ladies beyond showing my buddies that it's super easy to get attractive women to respond and engage with a guy they just met. I also think it's important to exercise my social and pickup skills whenever I can, though. I'd be happy to share how to practice game with other guys, but men just don't want to arse themselves with learning it. I saw that in the US ("I don't have time for games"), in Europe ("Women are becoming too self-centered"), and especially here, where spending a few dollars gets you companionship or sex with little to no effort. There are lots of nice nightclubs, social events, etc. where hiso ladies partake, but these guys literally have no interest.

On the bright side, the more guys scared of the nicer ladies, or unwilling to put the work to pull them in, the more open the field for the rest of us.

Cheers!

Title	Is Pickup Dying?
Author	funkysupe
Upvotes	42
Comments	71
Date	September 25, 2025 2:54 AM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1npvpio/is_pickup_dying/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-pickup-dying.1562748 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562748

Comments