Things I wish I knew years ago

TimPartendale · 2014-03-13T20:38:56+00:00

Get to the gym boys, it really helps

social_scrying · 2014-03-14T01:43:09+00:00

-Average folks will start dating/fall for those life has conveniently placed around them IE: coworkers, classmates, established friends ect. Your brain will adapt to attract you to what is available and consistently on your radar. This is a symptom of a very unremarkable lifestyle. Date outside your social circle, don't be a lemming.

This is a foundation concept i wish everyone was actively aware of, and one that I dont see enough of in this sub. I don't have a lot of fears, but my biggest one by far is living in mediocrity.

To be extraordinary is to live a life where you seek pleasures outside of your comfort zone.

conch13 · 2014-03-13T22:43:57+00:00

"Stop taking yourself so seriously, no one else is." Great advice

Cookiest · 2014-03-14T06:03:05+00:00

PUA is a useful tool for socially inhibited folks, but it is pathetic at a certain point.

I'll have to agree and disagree at the same time. I think after you've internalized all the PUA information and applied it in a real-world setting, you end up simplifying everything. This stuff really isn't that hard but at the same time I feel some of the veteran PUA stars have things to offer you that no one else can just due to sheer experience and years spent doing this. with that I'll leave you guys with the most minimalistic strategy guide that I feel sum up tons and tons of literature out there.

Always be escalating
Embrace your sexual nature and show it
Be a master of conversation
Always have options and never take any single woman that seriously
The biggest obstacle of success is fear. It's not real.
Be in complete control of your emotions.
Enjoy yourself above all else
Do not be needy
Be alpha, be dominant, be in command, be in control
Utilize negs, flirting, humor, sarcasm when appropriate
Never compromise yourself or your life for a woman.
Women are inevitably and undeniably attracted to wealth, status, and power. Work towards a stable and meaningful career.
Physical appearance is another undeniable truth, work on your fitness and dress well.
Free yourself from all restrictive social conditioning. Nothing is "creepy" if she's attracted to you.
A woman's words are unreliable. Look at her actions. They paint the truth for you.
If everything here is followed, I've found you get the girl(s) and you KEEP the girl(s).

SandtheB · 2014-03-13T22:11:42+00:00

Very good advice about being nice/sweet! you can still be nice just in the right ways, and the take charge advice is really good, that is one think to learn about being a nice guy, and making it work in dating life, taking charge.

Quagz504 · 2014-03-13T21:20:27+00:00

Words to live by.

deviantkrug · 2014-03-13T19:54:14+00:00

I definitely agree with all of this.

totes_meta_bot · 2014-03-14T00:36:25+00:00

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[/r/highseddit] "Things I wish I knew years ago"

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SheerWill · 2014-03-14T02:05:57+00:00

Could you elaborate on when PU becomes pathetic?

ohsballer · 2014-03-14T05:28:57+00:00

Solid yet realistic advice that doesn't sugarcoat anything.

I definitely agree that a woman's tolerance for assholes decreases with time. People need to be aware of that and adjust their approach accordingly.

2014-03-14T19:59:27+00:00

"Average folks will start dating/fall for those life has conveniently placed around them IE: coworkers, classmates, established friends ect. Your brain will adapt to attract you to what is available and consistently on your radar. This is a symptom of a very unremarkable lifestyle. Date outside your social circle, don't be a lemming."

This. This right here man. This is what all my depression stems from, and THIS is why I'm still a bitter angry neckbeard virgin.

Since I was in high school, I have been placed by my parents, and by my own retarded decisions, into environments which just DON'T ALLOW you to naturally get acquainted and meet women. Math major. Programming major. NO WOMEN major.

This is why each and every fucking day I go to school I get depressed, knowing that no matter how beta, everybody pretty much has already gotten some because life PLACED women infront of them that they could get without any effort. But me? nah not one. Me, I'm a sad bitter and near 22 year old kissless virgin. And a year ago I discovered this whole SEDDI/NOFAP/ATTRACTION SCEINCE thing, but the whole thing is so much harder to do than it is to just read about.

Because I'm stuck in the bitter mindset of "why coudln't I have an easy life with women". Why does everybody else get one without any effort ETC. I'm stuck here, I'm stuck with jerking it to fucking porn, and feeling sad about myself, and that's my reality.

artic_man · 2014-03-14T11:18:24+00:00

Also in my experience, going to the gym does not only make you look better to women, but also builds up your confidence, which is imo, the biggest factor to seduction

dannyboy1389 · 2014-03-14T14:21:51+00:00

what is PUA?

datpen · 2014-03-14T05:02:22+00:00

Things I wish I knew years ago?

Stop fucking masturbating.

I did about 60 days of NoFap. I have to say that doing that was the single biggest step I took towards changing my life. Even though I didn't last the full 90 days, It really helped me over come some of the confidence issues I had, and I am a way better person because of it.

Once you break a streak like that though, It's so hard start a new one, but I keep trying.

If you're interested, check out /r/NoFap.

jackpaxx · 2014-03-14T04:06:36+00:00

-The best pickup 'line' is simply "Hi!". I usually don't remember the first thing I said to women I end up with.

While I generally agree with this, I think an exception can me made for someone just beginning to approach girls with no experience. I think for a decent amount of people who are just starting this kind of thing care more about the opener and actually trying to start talking to the girl. Once you get more experience and have actually approached girls, then the opener should be the least important thing for interactions.

xzak · 2014-03-14T05:11:50+00:00

Persistence is different than making a total ass of yourself

please elaborate more

erthian · 2014-03-14T10:11:51+00:00

PUA is a useful tool for socially inhibited folks, but it is pathetic at a certain point.

This nicely sums up something I've tried to explain. Seduction is not about the rules, but the rules do help those who need them to get going. (Like me.)

kryptonyk · 2014-03-14T15:51:34+00:00

Thank you for a concise and meaningful post. This is what seddit needs more of!

deadpoolsnutsack · 2014-03-14T16:08:17+00:00

There's a point where bodybuilding just comes with diminished returns. I've gotten past the point where I don't lift for girls. Coming from a guy who used to be 155 lbs and 5'10, I now sit at 200 lbs at 12% bf. I go into the gym with headphones on and slaughter the weights. The only time girls even check me out is to see how much I'm pulling and even then I get that, "ew! That's too much!" Look. But know what? I'm a lot happier lifting and relieving stress that way than I was sarging Wednesday through Sunday till 2am but I'm going to continue getting big for the love of the sport. TL; DR- at some point bodybuilding will backfire with girls if you take it too far. But it will fulfill you just as much if not more if you do it for yourself.

ortofon88 · 2014-03-14T16:21:38+00:00

Care to elaborate womens version of game and fretting about it?

JefemanG · 2014-03-14T18:07:15+00:00

What is PUA?

busshelterrevolution · 2014-03-14T18:11:51+00:00

stay up on current events, do things you may not normally do, do new and exciting things every once in a while, watch a new movie or documentary once a week. Doing things like this can greatly improve your social skills. Over time you will know more about various things, maybe just enough to hold conversations with anybody.

melmelh · 2014-07-02T16:31:42+00:00

SO TRUUUE. This article says it the best: http://destinationfemme.com/lessons-20s-things-wish-knew/ SO funny and perfect for women, aka why not to have sex with so many guys..

AntixD · 2014-03-14T05:49:17+00:00

-Go to the gym, its a shallow world out there and women LOVE a guy with a nice build. Stop rationalizing reasons you don't need to go. Its just plain old fashioned good for you anyway.

THISSSSSS :D

enzo32ferrari · 2014-03-14T07:06:08+00:00

Women are just as interested in sex as men, they just go about it differently.

Girls have their own version of game too, and they fret about it.

Know when to fold your hand, no shame in pulling the eject lever if it plain ol' fashioned ain't happening. Persistence is different than making a total ass of yourself.

Pull the trigger on the kiss when the time is right, you will be shocked how often it goes over extremely well. Her eyes will tell you when the time is right.

Easier said than done but necessary: don't be a wuss - what's the worst that can happen?

ALL OF THESE GUYS! FUCK!

Cookiest · 2014-03-14T08:15:36+00:00

Amazing.

limeshathrow88 · 2014-03-14T03:09:39+00:00

solid.

acoustifreaque · 2014-03-14T03:10:11+00:00

I'm writing this shit down.

DSPR · 2014-03-14T06:10:24+00:00

-Go to the gym, its a shallow world out there and women LOVE a guy with a nice build. Stop rationalizing reasons you don't need to go. Its just plain old fashioned good for you anyway.

even better: going to gym is not necessary. gravity, time and willpower exist outside of it, everywhere. if every person on the planet adequately used what their own bodies and the planet and the clock gave them by default, for free, then we'd have a planet of very fit motherfuckers. gym ~= throwing money away and increasing pollution (assuming driving, increased pollution & oil-based fuel burning, etc.). fine if you're rich enough I guess, but most people aren't.

otherwise, the rest of your advice points are gold

rambopr · 2014-03-14T01:26:37+00:00

i'm not sure i want to keep reading a post that has such an elementary spelling error in the first sentence

snakers · 2014-03-14T12:41:18+00:00

-Women are just as interested in sex as men, they just go about it differently.

If you truly believe that, you have such a profound misunderstanding of not only the sexes, but of human nature itself. In fact, I would argue that one of the most significant differences between genders is their sex drive.

Title	Things I wish I knew years ago
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	695
Comments	164
Date	March 13, 2014 7:27 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/20ca2b/things_i_wish_i_knew_years_ago/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/things-i-wish-i-knew-years-ago.1305381 https://theredarchive.com/post/1305381