Why Men Are NOT APPROACHING WOMEN At The Work Place Anymore

ChaChanTeng · 2023-03-03T01:35:21+00:00

Rule of thumb: do not approach women in the workplace. Treat your place of work like a neutral zone and keep it simple. Hello, good morning, good night, etc. Obviously, be friendly but please, don’t flirt, just leave it be. Meet women elsewhere. This is not rocket science, and FFS, keep your political/religious/social opinions to yourself.

xMariaChan22 · 2023-03-02T21:20:33+00:00

Approaching in the workplace is definitely not good anyways unless its the break.

Dependent-Analysis67 · 2023-03-03T03:07:20+00:00

Dating a coworker is always a bad idea. It took two times before my dumbass learned this lesson

hsvgamer199 · 2023-03-03T01:43:08+00:00

Don't shit where you eat.

hotpotato138 · 2023-03-02T21:54:45+00:00

I don't date coworkers, so no flirting. I only talk about work and neutral topics with my female coworkers.

Fuzzy_Department2799 · 2023-03-02T22:38:45+00:00

I have a woman starting in the department next week. I reminded all he guys that even if she starts flirting they need to shut that shit down because it isn't worth their job.

63daddy · 2023-03-02T23:54:37+00:00

Yep. Men approaching women is more likely to be considered harassment so men do it less. Yet, women complain it’s harder to date. It’s hypocritical to complain that men approach women, then complain dating is harder.

Contrarian_Eh · 2023-03-02T21:37:46+00:00

It's pretty much grounds for dismissal now lol

gixxer · 2023-03-02T23:57:52+00:00

Pence rule

OkMean · 2023-03-02T21:23:47+00:00

I do not approach women at all anymore. 99% are just looking for a wallet.

[deleted] · 2023-03-03T08:19:27+00:00

You can't really win.

Bit introverted by nature? You're creepy.

Keep yourself to yourself? You're creepy.

Try to make conversation? You're creepy.

I mean I'm good at small talk. I have to speak to Nurses, Occupational Therapists, Social Workers throughout the day. I do budget reviews, so I have to be quite harsh. I need to keep it light. I mean, I'm even a Graduate Member of the British Psychological Society and I am still acutely aware that one wrong word, misspoken and I'll be seen as inappropriate.

Heck, my old manager is still known as 'the Predator'.

local_meme_dealer45 · 2023-03-03T00:03:31+00:00

I'm not sure why women are so surprised about this. For the last decade, all we have heard is story after story of men getting their life destroyed (rightfully or wrongfully) because of an interaction at work with a female colleague.

Men aren't stupid and because of this the #MeToo crowd got what they seem to have wanted and men will avoid doing anything even remotely sexual or flirty while working.

Even more so I know quite a few men will refuse to train women or do anything where they're in a 1:1 interaction with them. Is that gender discrimination, probably. Does it make complete sense why the men are doing this, yep.

jokerfriend6 · 2023-03-02T22:48:25+00:00

About 1/3rd of our workforce is women. If I approach them, I am cordial, nice, and keep the conversation relatively short and to the point. Talking with male colleagues and ignore female colleagues can get one in hot water as well.

Deep-Ad591 · 2023-03-03T01:52:29+00:00

Totally agree, not a good idea to flirt with women at work, just work related conversations, that's why I prefer the Work from home, less risk to screw up things

mgez · 2023-03-03T01:56:12+00:00

I would never higher beautiful women when I ran an office. Would I hire women, yes.. only if they were homely.

My first year in management I did not have this rule in my back pocket and it was such a night mare with all the HR bullshit. Never again.

parahacker · 2023-03-03T01:46:10+00:00

So, it's an important topic to discuss, but this video does a fucking terrible job of it.

Everything from not crediting its sources for clips, to unprepared tone shifts leading to not knowing what position it's basing its logic on, to just bad reasoning. No, I can't even call it 'bad reasoning' - it's like you leave off halfway in the middle of constructing a logical premise to begin a different one, then lose the thread on that one as well.

The voice is so slick it's easy to miss sometimes, but trying to follow the thread is an exercise in frustration.

Not even advocating one way or the other on this. My own personal opinion is that bias against men in these situations has gotten way out of hand and men are justified in being averse, but if that's what the person or team behind this is arguing they're doing a shit job of it. And if they're arguing against that, they're doing a shit job of that argument. Or if they're not taking either position, but trying to represent both 'fairly' (if such a thing is possible), then they're doing a shit job of that too.

Best I can say is that the visuals and audio are clean and decent production quality. I'll give it that much.

But no matter what your stance is on this topic, this video was fucking awful otherwise.

Wlufy · 2023-03-03T08:26:59+00:00

Why do you want to approach women at work? Just don't.

When it comes at work, you are there to make money and to bring home money. Stop making workplace / office to approach women.

Also don't reveal too much about you at work. Just be reserved as much as you can.

suj1290 · 2023-03-03T02:21:23+00:00

Workplace is the last place you approach a female

smfuel87 · 2023-03-03T05:52:26+00:00

Don't shit where you eat.

ZekalMacabre · 2023-03-03T06:31:29+00:00

When I was much, much younger I worked as a telemarketer (HORRIBLE fucking job. Soul crushing. NOT worth it.) and hit it off with a colleague. We started talking on the phone (back in the days of home phones) after work. The conversations were nothing out of the ordinary. Light flirting and nothing inappropriate beyond that. One day the call centre manager calls me into his office and apparently this dumb bitch told him that I was sexually harassing her?

Except I wasn't. She initiated the light flirting and never gave ANY sign that she had any problem with it whatsoever. The call centre manager automatically took her word for it (older man, probably no longer alive) and fed me the "I've been around the block, I know when I hear the truth." bullshit.

I was in utter shock initially and then I got pissed off, realizing what was about to happen. I told him "Then you need to go around the block a few more times, she's lying to you and you're stupid enough to actually believe her." His face was bright red.

I took my stuff and left, never came back. It was a shitty job. Fuck them.

What really gets me is that this ignorant old man was so sure he was right he didn't even ask for my side. He didn't want to be proven wrong.

I had some friends in the call centre after and apparently the lying bitch left about a month later. Don't know if she was fired or quit. She was there and then she wasn't.

Good riddance to lying cunts.

JasenBorne · 2023-03-02T22:20:56+00:00

well no, because you look at them the wrong way and suddenly you have a meeting with HR. christ, sometimes i think men and women shouldn't even be in the same room.

AndyBrown65 · 2023-03-03T02:29:02+00:00

Treat any female coworker like a male coworker except for banter or jokes

Fantastic_Box3257 · 2023-03-03T05:04:29+00:00

Men listen to this scientifically proven advise

Workplace is for work , don't make it a drama show,if you like someone think it is worth the risk to destroy your career

Swipergoneswipe · 2023-03-03T15:18:18+00:00

I work in a female dominated industry and yea...the ass smacks, the weird compliments, the inappropriate questions...but my male bosses think it's funny. Switch the roles and I'd be blacklisted from any other firm

Ohiogarbageman · 2023-03-03T02:02:11+00:00

I don't make much, but I don't have to tslk to a female coworker mre than 2 to 3 times a year. It's definitely a perk of my job.

Hoonrats · 2023-03-03T05:26:39+00:00

You're better off not getting into with co-workers, that's what they want. I just worry about myself., but if I'm approached which does happen I will responed positively because that's my personality, nothing extra!

dibberdott · 2023-03-03T02:29:00+00:00

The fear is real even if someone is not going to date coworkers, ( I'm married), but say a joke that is a bit off or compliment anything. It can backfire. Not worth it.

I also enjoy the professional environment with women.

Kedri32518 · 2023-03-03T04:23:06+00:00

I keep my distance as well. Our organization had a male employee who was accused of inappropriate behavior towards a female colleague. There was little to no witnesses when it allegedly happened, but he was terminated the next day.

Anyway I've always been keeping my distance towards new female employees. Those that I've known and worked with for some time, I'm generally fine with just casual chit-chat or watercooler talk. Topics are very general and office-friendly. In some situations where I have to interact with the new employees I would make sure it's done in an area in full view of other colleagues or have another person in the room.

I do the same when I'm outside work too, l'm not risking my life to be accused of a creep or charged with some criminal offense for nothing. The world is fucked up for a male these days, and as a man I'm taking precautions since no one else will protect me.

randomaviary · 2023-03-03T15:32:22+00:00

Don’t date women you work with period. HR exists for the sole purpose of protecting the company, and to that end, they will fire men for being involved with any woman at the company while keeping the woman on board. No woman on earth is worth your career. Not a one.

todoke · 2023-03-03T17:14:19+00:00

The double standard is incredible. All my friends have stories about women blatantly coming on to them at work, work events and dinners or via text dropping of obvious hints. One friend told me a coworker walked by at a corporate event and and whispered very direct sexual invitations into his ears, another told me about a woman grabbing a leg under the table at a team dinner etc.

Imagine if a man just goes for it and gets it wrong by trying it on a woman who is not into him. It's basically game over.

harmonica2 · 2023-03-03T02:15:25+00:00

I originally met my gf at work, and she approached me and I was a subordinate compared to her. But maybe it has a history of going down more smoothly if the woman approaches the man?

Lon3Wo1f-117 · 2023-03-03T02:25:04+00:00

Yeah, all this ish I've been seeing has me to the point of wanting to avoid women. Not to try and look like a victim, but I have autism. Social situations are incredibly difficult for people like me even without the out of wack gender dynamics. When you add the toxic witch hunt environment, I just would rather not even take the chance. I know I can come off as creepy.

I know this environment also affects men without autism, but I figured I'd give my two cents since I don't hear this mentioned a lot. Also, to that dude that reads through my comments to invalidate future arguments by pointing out my autism: just stop. Doing that shows you don't have an actual argument.

Brandwein · 2023-03-03T13:47:39+00:00

Often either school or work are THE best way to meet new people, especially for introverts. Kicking work out of the options leaves us adults pretty much in the dust.

In my workplace multiple couples have formed and i missed it a little with the paranoid attitude.

Nathaniel66 · 2023-03-03T06:00:50+00:00

Just to be clear. Approaching means talking with intention of date invitation or simple talk?

Throwawaydhxj · 2023-03-03T11:27:47+00:00

why would you make an approach in the work place. We there to work, if you are flirting on the job then your mind isn't in the right place. It should be on work. If it goes bad then you are stuck with that person and now the work environment sucks.

Theres a point why its a bad idea and in lots of places banned.

Point being this argument makes you look wierd even if you try to look at this in a different angle. Theres a place and a time where to find a romantic relationship and at work isnt it.

bigbouncingbanana · 2023-03-03T13:06:50+00:00

In 2023 approaching a female colleague for anything other than work related reasons is asking for trouble.

Man-splain · 2023-03-03T17:38:07+00:00

Don't crap where you eat! You are opening yourself up to problems. I have personally seen multiple occasions where women have caused legal problems for the employer and other employees for basically calling them out for bad behavior/ trying to hold them accountable for legitimate misbehavior. You don't want to give a woman the capability to cause you financial\career problems when their emotions inevitably take them on a ride.

https://youtube.com/shorts/CzoNX4ViwgM?feature=share?sub\_confirmation=1

energybeans · 2023-03-03T19:15:49+00:00

watched the video and I'm a guy and if I felt like I was friends with another guy (or girl) and I tried to give them a hug and they tensed up, I wouldn't take that personally.

just trying to be fair

paranoidwerewolf · 2023-03-04T02:52:34+00:00

For God’s Sake, Don’t Shit Where You Eat

DutchOnionKnight · 2023-03-03T16:33:18+00:00

Dont shit where you eat.

Digger_is_taken · 2023-03-03T01:04:11+00:00

This is kind of like when Peterson claimed that he couldn't figure out the rules of how to refer to Eliot Page. it's contrived and performative.

if you can't figure out how to talk to women without sexually harassing them, you're the problem. and yeah, you probably shouldn't be approaching any women until you develop some social skills.

RosyDA_RockinRoyal · 2023-03-03T07:44:42+00:00

... Why is this a bad thing? Do you mean in general or with like flirting?

I mean if in general I'm sorry for the discomfort. In my experience (19f) most people don't report even when uncomfortable. So if your not stepping on line it shouldn't be a problem.

If flirting I don't see an issue. But I'm ace so maybe I'm biased?

dibberdott · 2023-03-03T13:32:25+00:00

I just watched the video and can say that man was completely wrong I am 63 and I have never spontaneously initiated a hug with a female ever. The hugs I have received in my life even from my children wife and family or friends have always been Mutual and simultaneous. The other hugs I have given were asked for and happily given. Haha there are also like seven different kinds of hugs in the United States.

tonando · 2023-03-03T12:32:45+00:00

This video explains it better:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxuUkYiaUc8

Dapper_Platform_1222 · 2023-03-03T19:43:50+00:00

So there was a time in my life a few years back when I had broken up with my girlfriend and this girl that I worked with suddenly became very friendly. She would invite me out to drinks, text me constantly, etc. The texts were not innocuous things, she straight up would text me things that were sexual in nature. So anyways, thinking I couldn't miss, I asked her out. It completely destroyed the work environment. Completely destroyed whatever friendship we had. It was just really really weird. To this day, I still don't understand why she would speak to me in such a way if she had no interest in anything sexual. One of the true strange experiences but whatever.

Title	Why Men Are NOT APPROACHING WOMEN At The Work Place Anymore
Author	SampleMassive
Upvotes	253
Comments	116
Date	March 2, 2023 9:05 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/11ge0fq/why_men_are_not_approaching_women_at_the_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-men-are-not-approaching-women-at-the-work.1154703 https://theredarchive.com/post/1154703

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