Long story short, I accused her of cheating with little evidence in april, she said she tried to move past this but the last 2 weeks it has all come to a head and she had taken time at her friends to think, last week she stayed away and came to see me today to say that she loves me and cares for me but isn't in love me, there were tears and she asked me to hug her and I did after a pause for thought.

She didn't want to do couples counselling as she said "once you fall out of love with someone you can't fall back in love with someone" (which is bs but nevermind) I said that I will have to block her on everything (expect her number so we can sort divorce) so i can move on and she found that upsetting but understood.

She left saying she really didn't want to hurt me and she pleaded with me to remain civil and that we could still be friends, I agreed to be civil but said being friends was not likely, she asked for another hug and balled her eyes out.

I started taking down all the pictures we have and putting them in the bin, I said I was doing this to move on but not hurt her and she said she had to leave as it was upsetting. She asked if i wanted her rings and i said yes, she then gave them to me.

I said I won't contact her again unless it was for divorce proceedings or if she made contact to give it another go but said I'll contact in a month to talk about divorce.

I am broken as I loved her, I never saw this happening and I am 33 with no kids, I don't want kids so dating will be a fucking nightmare.

Some part hopes that the lack of contact for a month will patch things up enough that she will regret leaving me and want to give it another go but I also understand I can't cling on to that hope.