You know she’s not right, but you keep talking to her anyway

CommercialConcern828 · 2024-11-14T18:57:04+00:00

It’s a rental car, so long as it works for the ride it should be fine.

Professor_Thunder69 · 2024-11-14T08:25:10+00:00

Do the right thing and move on or just tell her that you see red flags and give her a chance to explain herself, before sleeping with her. Communicate. Then decide if you're gonna take the chance. You only live once.

willowtrees_r_us · 2024-11-14T05:27:46+00:00

Talk bang and move on.

probebeta · 2024-11-14T04:56:58+00:00

If you're not planning to keep her what's wrong with continuing to talk to her.

I had a few instances where I ditched dates because I had a serious problem with them seeing me as a beta provider, red flags, maybe a bit flakey, genuine desire wasn't quite there. It busted my ego so I let them go. But I'll come clean, reality is I was dying to sleep with them. And from experience, you probably will if you maintain your cool and play it right. Are they long term relationship type? No. But they are pretty fun. Know that from the get go, and just have fun with it. That's my 2c anyway.

No-Asparagus6937 · 2024-11-14T04:26:10+00:00

Here is my 2 cents, your logic should prevail but even then your mind plays games. Dont be with someone if you are not ready to walk away immediately if they start to play games. Unfortunately we got burned to be here and the reason is because we let them hurt us. We saw the red flags and we chose to be with them. The red flags were always there. So its either you are strong to walk away later or walk away now. She will hurt you.

Commercial-Doubt-612 · 2024-11-13T23:13:09+00:00

Physical attraction can be fatal. I am going to keep casual and none committed. Loneliness and yearning for intimacy is going f us up. I hope we can go beyond this. Just not our destine to grow old with a partner. At least we have kids to bury us, when the time comes.

crosseyedhopper · 2024-11-13T23:00:55+00:00

Heck, I fell for a girl who made it clear she just wanted to be friends. I blame my loneliness for it. Ended up pushing her away.

yosemitesam00 · 2024-11-13T20:50:08+00:00

Don't complicate your life. You've recognized the red flags, act accordingly.

MonarchistExtreme · 2024-11-13T19:42:42+00:00

I stopped dating for this very reason. I am so conditioned to please that no matter what these crazy gals I dated threw at me...I felt myself sliding back into that familiar role.

Deleted all dating apps. Said a sincere prayer to God if he wants me with someone, he will send her my way. So far all evidence points to me being alone as His plan, and I am fine with it.

Edit remark: it was easier for me bc I have a son that lives with me full time. He's about to turn 18 and we are just as much friends now as parent/child. So I'm not lonely. If he wasn't around, I'm positive I'd be missing having a girlfriend.

qtipheadosaurus · 2024-11-13T18:55:30+00:00

The fact you're asking means you're already fucked emotionally. So you have no choice but to just enjoy the ride. Lol

However you have to draw the line at financials. As soon as you start committing finances you have to hold back and reassess to make sure she's worth it.

ExaminationKlutzy194 · 2024-11-13T18:47:11+00:00

Entrepreneurs in Cars is a good YouTube channel to help you sort some of this out as well.

NewDay0110 · 2024-11-13T18:32:24+00:00

Why are guys so dumb to keep making the same mistakes over and over again? The little head overpowers the big head for most. I guess that's how there ended up being 8 billion of us. 🤷‍♂️

Expert-Raccoon6097 · 2024-11-13T18:07:38+00:00

Keep it casual with her and have fun.

That is the huge perk of divorce - no more commitment.

Gattsama · 2024-11-13T18:00:38+00:00

The issue is you are coming for a scarcity mindset. If you believe that _this_ woman is an option, but others are not, you start to make compromises. Instead you need an abundance mindset; she's not 1 in a million, she's 1 of a million. No matter how hot she is, there are always other girls just as hot that are not as crazy mental. Are they rare, yes. Are they hard to find, yes. Are they able to select from multiple men that want them, yes. Do you qualify to be with her, maybe 🤷‍♀️

Point is, do not get fixated on one woman. There is no shortage of women, they are everywhere.

If you can already see the red flags then you need to step way back and think about what the your goal is? It's often true that the more crazy in the head she is the better the sex, but is that worth it or all there is?

Reflog1791 · 2024-11-13T17:46:38+00:00

Date multiple women and find whatever it is you are looking for.

Expatriated_American · 2024-11-13T17:30:01+00:00

I did this for six months while separated, while making it clear that it was a casual arrangement and I was dating others. She was very hot, smart, interesting, extroverted, great in bed, and a total mess. Her BPD was exhausting. Honestly I don’t regret it, but I’m glad I moved on when I did.

Illustrious_Cut_1839 · 2024-11-13T17:26:18+00:00

It all depends on your mind set.

I have dated red flag ridden ladies. I have had fun with them, but always knew that things were short-term. If there is mutual attraction enjoy it, but don't commit to anything.

Just define internally what you are willing to tolerate and move on when they cross the line.

DaddyNoBux · 2024-11-13T17:26:10+00:00

I hear you bro. I’m in a similar situation

I’m getting close to this woman. She has more red flags than there are stars in the sky

But my god, what an ass she has.

It’s easy to give advice on this one however let’s be honest, it’s super hard to pass up a chance with an attractive lady

ChicoBrillo · 2024-11-13T17:21:13+00:00

its called desperation

Nighthawk2824 · 2024-11-13T17:20:17+00:00

Hell no, I did this for a bit and it was the most draining shit I ever encountered. Do not entertain her anymore as hard as it is. My life has been more peaceful since I cut her ass off.

ExaminationKlutzy194 · 2024-11-13T17:20:12+00:00

There’s a really good book called The Tactical Guide to Women. It’s about 250 pages long, written by a psychologist. It addresses risk mitigation with women and things like this.

Lean_BigDaddy · 2024-11-13T17:04:08+00:00

Just don’t marry or move her in, enjoy it while it lasts, learn when the red flags start burning and move on lessons learned, should make you stronger! lol

MotorBoatingCFL · 2024-11-13T17:01:48+00:00

Your peace is more valuable than your loneliness.......I PROMISE.

You are the prize my man. 👊

Title	You know she’s not right, but you keep talking to her anyway
Author	DudeforRighteousness
Upvotes	12
Comments	26
Date	November 13, 2024 4:55 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1gqhid7/you_know_shes_not_right_but_you_keep_talking_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/you-know-shes-not-right-but-you-keep-talking-to.1535673 https://theredarchive.com/post/1535673

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