You know what’s worse than divorce?

Noodelz-1939 · 2026-01-03T05:56:50+00:00

Divorcing a full blown narcissist / NPD.

survivingtheyellowbr · 2025-09-30T00:47:44+00:00

Getting remarried ..LOL

Nether_Chain529 · 2025-09-28T16:45:35+00:00

Yeah I’m going through this now with my stbx. I foolishly agreed to marriage counseling. She immediately turned the tables and made out like she was the victim. Every time she talks about the relationship it’s about how she can’t understand why I want to leave. Why I suddenly no longer love her.

Behind closed doors, it’s love bombing and acknowledging years of abusive behavior. Or going completely passive-aggressive to outright insulting. Sometimes in a matter of minutes. It’s insane. I need her cooperation because I want to preserve what I’ve built. But man I’m starting to think it’s not worth it.

brightfutureforsure · 2025-09-28T16:42:21+00:00

Going through this now. Only after the split did I realize the NPD. Shame on me for not seeing it sooner but being the expert she is, she slowly pulled me into her crazy world. Once I recognized the behavior I experimented with some responses to mitigate her NPD approach and things have settled down decently. Therapy and journaling has helped a lot. It’s still no walk in the park but as we get closer to the end of this process she is learning that I am not her victim to control. Unfortunately a lot of that energy is being directed to my kids. Thankfully they are older and can see through the BS especially when they can escape it every few days at my house. I’ve had to let go of feeling bad for her and rather approach every interaction as an opportunity for her to deal with her shit on her own. Hoping she finds someone new to divert the energy to. Chatted with a few of her friends who are starting to get pulled in and they call her out for her behavior. It’s a minefield though everyday.

Boglehead101 · 2025-09-26T16:37:21+00:00

Mine is a total narcissist, materialistic, entitled and no empathy. Engages in performative parenting, has done a job on one of the teens who dislikes me now.

The discard was brutal. She filed & absolutely despises me. I’m not conceding to her demands and the further down the rabbit hole this divorce takes us the more she despises me.

At this point I’m weighing the benefits of totally pissing her off for sport.

SickBoyNoFuture · 2025-09-26T16:30:57+00:00

Marriage

nomoreshoppingsprees · 2025-09-26T14:10:01+00:00

Do u get that "why dont you just talk things out like I did with my ex" bs?

AmericanGoldenJackal · 2025-09-26T13:51:49+00:00

How long has she drawn it out so far? Mine took three years.

Does she have child hostage(s)?

mesi130 · 2025-09-26T12:58:48+00:00

Having an ex with mental health issues that won’t give up. No matter how far you run she’ll find you.

ApprehensiveSpare925 · 2025-09-26T12:39:24+00:00

My STBXW is both a narcissist and bi polar. Fun times.

crayzeejew · 2025-09-26T12:28:25+00:00

A helpful guide that I recommend to my clients:

Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder by Bill Eddy

Reverend0352 · 2025-09-26T12:27:27+00:00

As a therapist I’ll take a NPD over Borderline Personality Disorder every day. If my spider senses any BPD I run.

Old_Manufacturer8635 · 2025-09-26T11:58:00+00:00

Can women have NPD? Only ever heard it used for men

soontobesolo · 2025-09-26T10:49:50+00:00

Staying married is worse.

masterofmydomain6 · 2025-09-26T10:38:38+00:00

NPD?

Freeman2be · 2025-09-26T10:26:07+00:00

The only thing worse that marrying a narcissist, is divorcing a narcissist.

tyveill · 2025-09-26T10:15:01+00:00

Why is it worse?

Since NPD is a disorder, it makes your opponent weaker and gives you some advantage in the fight.

Title	You know what’s worse than divorce?
Author	Noodelz-1939
Upvotes	46
Comments	70
Date	September 26, 2025 10:04 AM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1nqxdfk/you_know_whats_worse_than_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/you-know-whats-worse-than-divorce.1562851 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562851

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