At a bar, best response to "Buy me a drink."

super-commenting · 2016-01-26T19:42:11+00:00

Pretend you misheard her . "oh that's very generous of you, I'd like a jack and coke"

ToSeeAndToHear · 2016-01-26T16:58:02+00:00

I would, but I'm a feminist.

MuhTriggersGuise · 2016-01-26T20:56:53+00:00

buy me a drink!

amused: cool we can swap! I'm top shelf only.
flip the script: how about you buy me one?
stoic: maybe after I know you.
destroy: you're not worth the five.
black Knight: so I'm just an atm? That's insulting. I'm triggered.
qualify: why are you worth one?/what makes you awesome enough to deserve one?
commander: I like x, i'll get a table while you get first round.
Mastery: aren't you presumptuous?
scarcity: Sorry, already juggling 3.

Just a few examples I've used. A hard no is a great way to dismiss, but it's a lost opportunity. My personal favorite is a mix of stoicism and qualifying:

Why aren't you buying me one?

niczar · 2016-01-26T16:58:01+00:00

You could say "no," but it would serves absolutely no purpose.

Instead use her chutzpah to your advantage. Make her perform. And then don't buy her a drink.

[deleted] · 2016-01-26T16:01:53+00:00

"How about you buy the first round and I'll buy the next?"

That way you can tell if she's just looking for a free drink or wanting to get to know you.

Edit: This doesn't apply if she has multiple friends that you also have to buy for.

FrameWalker · 2016-01-26T16:31:47+00:00

"No problem"

Order a drink and a glass of water. Give her the water and walk away.

idgaf- · 2016-01-26T16:17:44+00:00

The line really doesn't matter as long as your mind and body display amusement. "Why?" "Tell me a good joke."

But if you're getting hit with this you've probably already failed, or she is not worth your time.

fortheloveofpercy · 2016-01-26T15:47:56+00:00

"Are you going to have sex with me?"

It's straight to the point and digs to the heart of any male/female relationships.

Women know they're exploiting their sexuality for your resources. An ex went around a bar asking losers, "buy a stranger a drink?"

1NV0K3R · 2016-01-26T18:33:14+00:00

"I only buy drinks for girls I've slept with."

BoredOnATuesdayNight · 2016-01-26T17:17:44+00:00

"Does this always work for you?"

[deleted] · 2016-01-27T01:17:12+00:00

Dance for it.

[deleted] · 2016-01-26T16:15:16+00:00

"Is that just a down payment?"

"Yeesh, be a little more discreet about selling yourself to me. Could be cops in here."

Or if you aren't comfortable dissing them a little bit, go with something like "Nah but I'll play you in a game of [insert bar game] and winner buys."

Toverspreuk · 2016-01-26T19:49:42+00:00

"No."

abdada · 2016-01-26T15:59:38+00:00

"I always do, but you get the first two rounds "

opening_eyes · 2016-01-26T16:24:35+00:00

Oh shit did you lose your purse?!

RPAlternate42 · 2016-01-26T19:31:34+00:00

"I don't buy drinks for women I don't know."

fnordsnord · 2016-01-26T21:44:52+00:00

Cocky: "No, no, the Rule Book Says YOU buy the first round." (With shit-eating grin and complete confidence.)

Suave: "No, but you can buy ME one." (Lower voice, smiling.)

constructiveasshole · 2016-01-27T00:01:29+00:00

You guys are cute.

Act surprised. Give her a discerning look. Look her up and down. Say "hmmmm....". Ask her to turn in a circle so you can examine the goods. Tap the stranger next to you on the shoulder and say "This girls thinks she's worth a free drink from me. What do you think?" Dude will probably say "uhhh....sure?" Say "hmm maybe. What's your name?" Talk to her. Game her. Make her wait for the drink and don't order it until you're sure she wants to fuck you. If she disappears during any of this, she was never going to fuck you and isn't worth the drink.

If she's really hot, "Oooh I like this game. Okay you get an interesting drink for me and I'll get one for you." Announce to the bartender you're playing a game. Make sure to ONLY put one drink on your tab, and don't give it to her until she's bought you one. Turn it into a conversation-starter. If she leaves or renegs on the deal, drink's for you.

Rasalom72 · 2016-01-26T15:51:27+00:00

Just look her up and down, show a bit of displeasure on your face, and say "No... why don't you buy me one?"

animalpoo · 2016-01-26T17:22:53+00:00

1 Water Bomb please . Or ignore

ItIsMyPrivilege · 2016-01-26T22:43:00+00:00

"Did this work last weekend?"

Hopefully she says yes

"Oh, I see. You should have spent some time getting ready to go out this weekend"

6/10, the follow up could be better. Basically say it with a massive shit eating grin and it should work 50% of the time, all the time

plenty_of_eesh · 2016-01-26T20:27:28+00:00

"Do you deserve one?"

IVIaskerade · 2016-01-26T20:29:55+00:00

"Ladies first"

[deleted] · 2016-01-26T21:04:53+00:00

Her: Buy me a drink.

You ask for a glass of water.

joshsoowong · 2016-01-26T21:35:36+00:00

Make me a millionaire.

marty2k · 2016-01-26T22:01:51+00:00

"OK, do you want lemon with your water?" or just say "OK" and get her a water.

int3rnetz · 2016-01-26T22:30:09+00:00

Sure what do you want? Nice, I like those too.

Bar tender, Can I get a soda water with a lemon for the lady.

Ishazak · 2016-01-26T23:38:58+00:00

I like - "you first"

or just order yourself one and get her a water laugh at her stupid face.

JimFury · 2016-01-26T23:40:58+00:00

I was asked by these two girls a few years ago to buy them a drink, surprisingly they dont blatently ask at least from my experience, I told them sorry I don't buy girls drinks. They were cool with that and I ended up talking to them most of the night and leaving with both of them.

ioncehadsexinapool · 2016-01-27T00:03:55+00:00

I say "buy me a drink" or "why would I?" Hamster doesn't like either of those.

RedWizardOfWales · 2016-01-27T00:04:33+00:00

"Suck my dick."

penguin_says_slide · 2016-01-27T00:28:18+00:00

Say sure and tell her to bring her girlfriends. Their boyfriends too and now that you have a large following behind you at the bar, get the bartender to give you like 9 shot glasses of water. Tell them it's a special new drink and then watch them down the water after thanking you.

You might have to bribe the bartender like a buck or so, totally worth it.

McLarenX · 2016-01-27T00:29:36+00:00

Ask her what she would like to drink. If she suggest a cheap beer, playfully insult her choice and tell her to order a nice cocktail instead. Order a water for yourself. When order comes, switch the two and slowly drink the top shelf mixer in front of her without saying a word. If she doesn't act like a bitch and appreciates the humor, offer a sip.

drqxx · 2016-01-27T02:00:41+00:00

I will but you have to buy the first round. That's my policy

prodigy2throw · 2016-01-27T02:56:50+00:00

Either say yes and then ask the bartender for a glass of water.

Or simply "nah".

Edit: if you're in a dive bar or the girls looking like she's about it then "let me see your tits". Might get lucky.

Thotwrecker · 2016-01-27T06:37:35+00:00

I only buy drinks for girls I've made out with

Can substitute for danced with or anything similar. The point is, you want to communicate - I have no problem buying you a drink, I'm not a cheapass and I'll shell out the 12 bucks for your appletini if that means I'll plow you tonight. But I'm not a chump and I only reward bitches with drinks, I'm not looking to buy you a drink for nothing.

This happens generally if the girl is A) drunk or B) in need of validation / looking to confirm she's still got it.

The first thing to do is NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. Never take any female club behavior seriously. First, by smiling, you convey that you get it, it's not serious behavior, it's just a game to both of you. Smile and say "well, can you dance better than that girl?" and nod towards a girl grinding hard on a dude. "Come prove it and we'll do a round," take her hand, and lead.

Keep it simple - get something out of her then reward her with a drink.

RP-robot · 2016-01-27T07:07:32+00:00

Used "Okay. But you have to do a trick first. Roll over!" After her friends stopped laughing, I asked the HB8 to dance.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2016-01-27T15:30:37+00:00

"no"

Easy as that.

kempff · 2016-01-28T04:11:47+00:00

I don't buy strange women drinks.

TomFoo · 2016-01-28T10:15:37+00:00

"Naw, I'm going to hit on your friend instead."

Jack4ss92 · 2016-01-26T17:54:46+00:00

"Give me a break."

94redstealth · 2016-01-26T18:26:57+00:00

"I only buy after the 3rd orgasm"

[deleted] · 2016-01-26T18:09:04+00:00

'You first, then i'll do the next'

lLoveLamp · 2016-01-26T16:09:37+00:00

'' I thought you women were independant and didn't need a man to buy your own shit? ''

ioncehadsexinapool · 2016-01-27T00:12:33+00:00

Or. Buy her a drink and when she's about to drink it slap it out of her hands into the floor just for the lulz

Werewolf35b · 2016-01-26T23:31:04+00:00

These are ALL terrible and cheesy as hell.

Buy the poor thirsty lady a drink.

Title	At a bar, best response to "Buy me a drink."
Author	futianze
Upvotes	37
Comments	110
Date	January 26, 2016 3:42 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/42s1br/at_a_bar_best_response_to_buy_me_a_drink/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/at-a-bar-best-response-to-buy-me-a-drink.159 https://theredarchive.com/post/159

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