333,620 posts

I white-knighted and paid the price... Never be the white knight.

673 upvotes
by on /r/TheRedPill
22 March 2018 05:20 PM UTC

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TL;DR: I stuck up for a friend's girlfriend... she mocked me for it behind my back. Don't be the white knight.

I've been a follower of TRP for a couple of years now. It's had such a great impact on my life. But once in awhile, I have a "hiccup" where I fall back into my old Blue Pill ways. I thought this could be a healthy reminder for folks.

A couple of nights ago, my friend and I were out drinking. He gets a text from his girlfriend that she and some female friends are at a bar down the street. I'm always game to meet some new chicks, so we head right over.

Now, my friend's girlfriend (let's call her Sara) is an extremely stupid person. All of us in the group know this. Even the boyfriend.

But that night, one of Sara's girlfriends (let's call her C-Word) was being extremely belittling to her in front of us -- dismissing everything Sara said, calling her a moron in a non-joking way, etc. I was drunk and thought I'd stick up for my friend's girlfriend.

"You are really being kind of a bitch to her," I said to C-Word. "She's your friend. And that's how you talk to her?"

The stink-eye C-Word got was priceless. Sara didn't say anything, and I decided to completely turn my attention to one of the other girls around. Let's call her Girl 3.

Eventually, the night came to an end and I decided to hit the road.

It turns out, the second I left, Sara apologized to C-Word for my behavior. Not only that, Sara turned to Girl 3 and said "I just feel sorry for you... YOU had to talk to him all night." So Sara, C-Word and Girl 3 all had a laugh at my expense (according to the my friend -- who ended up getting in a huge fight and nearly breaking up with her over it).

The bottom line is this: Sara is a stupid person. And when she was being treated like a stupid person, I should have kept my mouth shut.



Post Information
Title I white-knighted and paid the price... Never be the white knight.
Author
Upvotes 673
Comments 193
Date 22 March 2018 05:20 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/49310
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/86d9mp/i_whiteknighted_and_paid_the_price_never_be_the/
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Comments

603 upvotesWestwood_12 years ago

I’m sure she appreciated you sticking up for her. Seriously. But you’re a random guy, and Cunt is her “friend.” You embarrassed Cunt and potentially started something by calling Cunt out, so Sara had to patch things over as soon as you left. Sara knows her place in that social hierarchy, and needed to assure Cunt that things weren’t going to change because of what you said.

So yeah, you did something nice. And predictably, you made yourself the foil for the tension within that “friendship.”

272 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

There was definitely some of that going on. Boyfriend told me that Cunt is the "leader" of the group and Sara is terrified of upsetting her. Fuck Cunt.

51 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Maybe you could've taken the piss out of cunt without doing it in a protective 'white knight' way. Idk. Could've been interesting.

12 upvotesexcaliboor2 years ago

What would you do in his situation

3 upvotesjuliusstreicher2 years ago

This sounds pretty fucking soy inspired...

91 upvotesPhaedrusHunt2 years ago

Fuck Cunt.

Basically the code by which I live my life brah

36 upvotesmarkinsinz72 years ago

Yea in addition I'd say u didn't understand the fundamental social dynamics even. So whilst the white Knight part is bad u need to learn what to say to whom to say. Sara is probably the lowest status in the group because -dumb n pretty.

In general I'd advise against sticking up for people unless u gotta back up ur buddy in a fight with other guys or something. Even if suppose that cunt was insulting ur buddy u don't really get in her face he must be able to stand up for himself. If he's not able to do so as long as u don't get in on the joke with the girls that's all fine.

25 upvotesGenieGenius2 years ago

We should do up a post about these sort of uncommunicated social dynamics. Honestly, I think it's the biggest cock block for guys here because they don't understand the silent language of sexual attraction.

4 upvotesmarkinsinz72 years ago

Yea took me a long time to learn this shitt. Fuckin hate when i see high school kids who get it. Hell they even do it better than me. I still dont know how it comes so naturally to some people-highs school kids like wtf. I became aware like at 24 years sigh. As for the post yea I think a lot of pple have talked about it already some new red pillers don't get it right in early stages. Let it be, time is the best teacher of all

3 upvotesGenieGenius2 years ago

You realize you can still fuck high school chicks? They actually prefer older men. You can just lie and say you're 21. Besides, high school girls aren't exactly a catch and as a man your SMV doesn't peak until age 38.

TRP can also be detrimental to a high schooler because it can make women repulsive to him once he learns how female hypergamy works.

27 upvoteskellykebab2 years ago

Why though? Is respecting petty female hierarchies "manly" or Red Pill? If OP thinks Cunt is being a cunt, it's totally fine that he called her out. Why does he need to impress this shitty group of bitches?

11 upvotesOverkillengine2 years ago

It's more that unless there is some gain to be had from the interaction, why bother? Just silently take note of the cunt's behavior and apportion your trust accordingly. At most, be thankful you had the opportunity to learn her true colors without being the recipient.

And most certainly keep your current and future interactions with them as minimal as possible once you learn their nature.

8 upvoteskellykebab2 years ago

why bother?

Because part of being a man is being authentic. If you feel compelled to call out someone's bad behavior, you should be free to do so. Obviously, OP felt strongly about this. Why hold back?

9 upvotesOverkillengine2 years ago

Part of being a man is also being pragmatic instead of being a slave to your feeeeeeeeeeeeeelings.

5 upvotesTheProphetPhysiquiel2 years ago

Sure, you should be free to do so. But every action has consequences, and you must be prepared to deal with them.

3 upvotesThynome2 years ago

Upvoted because this is a question worth being asked

1 upvotesmarkinsinz72 years ago

It's about power dynamics man trust me it pissed me off too. Especially the more straight forward honest down to earth person u are the more pissed u get when u realise u can't talk about a lot of things in the open. It's the same reason why u can't explicitly call out women on being slutty or 2 faced and what not. Just the way the game is.

Look at it this way an authentic man doesn't call out women like that because he knows women are children. why take em seriously?why care at all? Remember he/she who cares less holds the power.

2 upvotesphysicalbitcoin2 years ago

And most certainly keep your current and future interactions with them as minimal as possible once you learn their nature.

This is the main point. They all sound like a bunch of idiots.

5 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

It's in the intention. The difference between SAVING Sara (white knight) vs calling a cunt a cunt.

5 upvoteskellykebab2 years ago

I don't really see how that matters. Being Red Pill means never being nice to women ever? Maybe OP misread the severity of the situation, but I think white knighting requires either a) a greater degree of overreaction from the guy, or b) a sublimated sexual intent/desire for the female victim. I don't think either factor was at play here.

Having any degree at all of a sense of protectiveness towards women is not necessarily white knighting. It's juts being a decent person.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Having any degree at all of a sense of protectiveness towards women is not necessarily white knighting. It's juts being a decent person.

It's trying to save them (Good boy syndrome) that's white knighting. While men have protective tendencies, a) they know how to pick their spots and b) it's really how we communicate that protection and our intention that matters. Social awareness is important here, and that's the difference. I elaborated on another thread here but due to TRP rules I can't link it (I tried the first time and got my submission removed)

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

There was definitely some of that going on. Boyfriend told me that Cunt is the "leader" of the group and Sara is terrified of upsetting her. Fuck Cunt.

Exactly. But here's where you correctly identify your White Knight behavior: it's not your problem, it's her problem. Sara is clearly the beta in that hierarchy and quite frankly is just there to get trampled on by Cunt, but it's better than not getting attention. That said, until she learns the lesson for herself, she's not going to stand up for herself.

Okay now, ready for this? You could have handled it the same exact way but came out as an alpha. If you called cunt out for being a cunt but in a way that wasn't overly dramatic (again, the alpha/leader is good at saying things as it, knows that sometimes subtlety goes a long way). The difference between a White Knight and a true alpha is the intention. You were wanting to save Sara, you felt sorry for her, didn't you? If you were your Alpha self, you probably would've said something and then moved on.

That's my four cents on this, feel free to disagree.

1 upvoteswiseclockcounter2 years ago

how would that alternative look, in your opinion?

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Sly, snarky remark that makes the group laugh. It's a group of females, so there's a sub-communication going on there. One does not need to hammer the point. Simply point it out, perhaps mask it under humor. Think about your favorite comedians - they're telling you a point right? Humor is just one way. Another way is to point it out but very subtly. Or - just say it out directly and without the "you're a fucking cunt to this nice little girl" intention and tone.

9 upvotesZormut2 years ago

More like fuck Sara. I feel that it's just a shitty girlfriend material to start with. It's not the C girl fault she wants to dominate, everyone does. Its Saras fault she lets everyone dominate her. On a more rational note: never give a random chick power. Shes ur friend's gf - she's no one to you.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

How're people so desperate for friends, they let someone treat them like that?

Your girlfriend doesn't have to go lifting with you, but being that much of a pushover is embarrassing. It goes beyond cute and girlish.

1 upvotesZormut2 years ago

On the bright side tho, her boyfriend does whatever the fuck he wants with her as soon as he keeps the frame stronger than the C girl.

1 upvoteswataDs2 years ago

There you go. If anything you should be feeling better about it. As Westwood said, Sara would've been grateful in different circumstances.You're a bang-up guy and you can recognize injustices. Nothing to be mad at Cunt or Sara about. (She's just fucking dumb)

0 upvotesHviterev2 years ago

That's not something strange. That's how group works. If you hate them, you're probably just a bad player and shouldn't write about the game.

0 upvotesWholesomeAwesome2 years ago

lol your a rag. Standing up for a girl against her own choices.

32 upvotesHavelBro_Logan2 years ago

I think Sara appreciates it but she probably can’t leave her social circle so she was forced to do that. You did the nice thing but it was disruptive and she had to shuffle everything back to being disfunctional. Reminds me of high school where I begrudgingly stayed friends with people that aren’t all that great.

27 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

(Sarah's words) "Dear, C-word don't think for a moment I'm getting less submissive than I have been up to now. I love things the way they are."

(Sarah's thoughts) (How would I live, without my own submission? Don't even wanna try to figure it! F**k that guy who took my defense!)

14 upvotesRocketScientist_nr32 years ago

(Girl 3's thoughts): "Woohoo! My social status is being validated over C-word's. I'll talk to this guy for the rest of the night to figure out if I can get some more validation/status out of OP"

...Later when OP is gone... (Everyone's intention): "Let's shift back to our usual social pecking order because OP's interference isn't worth arguing about. Let 's say some emotional sh*t and be irrational about it in order to forget about OP."

8 upvoteswataDs2 years ago

This is precisely why I've made it personal policy to not interject in other people's drama. There's much more undercurrent and background to people's interpersonal relationships to step in (unless necessary)

7 upvotesprojects_dude2 years ago

Yes, couples will have make up sex after their troubles. And come the next day or meet up you'll be the odd man out.

At best I found you can make a joke about how stupid their fight is, but once you start choosing sides, people remember which one you choose later, regardless of who's fault it was.

7 upvotesGobraves442 years ago

Incredible play by play break down

5 upvotesboxxybebe2 years ago

Love this comment, sometimes the guys forget to see girls as humans and instead automatically sentence the girl's behavior to the "benefit" of the affirmative.

1 upvotesCoptek911 year ago

Who said girls weren't humans? We just know females and their social dynamics are drastically different than those of men.

1 upvotesboxxybebe1 year ago

What I'm saying is that when there's a situation where the reason behind a girl's action could have equally been either positive or negative, many tend to automatically jump to the negative conclusion, and rarely consider giving her the benefit of the doubt.

5 upvoteskellykebab2 years ago

Very perceptive. With a normal, reasonably confident woman, OP probably wouldn't have gotten the same result. But Sara sounds like she has poor self-esteem and needs to fit in with her shitty friends. Not everyone is like that.

5 upvotesNightwingTRP2 years ago

+1 point for this clear insight into the social dynamics. I have no idea why you're not commenting here more often.

3 upvotesatifhere2 years ago

Yes, its not whiteknighting nor that woman considered it to be. Whiteknighting is something that you do expecting that girl will feel attraction in return. He did it simply because he felt bad for her.

2 upvotesmishasam892 years ago

tension within that “friendship.”

Lol!

I never understood these types of "friendships"

is this like "attach yourself to a stronger person" thing?

1 upvotessadomasochrist2 years ago

Succinctly it was DLV.

381 upvotesAuvergnat2 years ago

Let's be clear here. White-knighting is "defending a woman usually from men in the more or less conscious hope that you'll get rewarded with sex". What you did here is not as much white-knighting as stupidly getting involved in the complex politics of the female social matrix.

In summary, what you have there is a social circle of three females composed of a mother hen and two followers. Within this group, mother hen is constantly working on covertly maintaining her authority, while the two others are working on covertly undermining her authority. And all at the same time are doing so while trying to look irreproachable and maintaining consensus at all times.

  • Cunt belittling Sara was a way for her to maintain her authority over the girls. The girls know to expect this. It probably happens all the time.

  • By getting involved, you overtly interrupted a social process that is based on the appearance of consensus. That's bad for all of them.

  • Sara apologizing to Cunt for you was a way to maintain consensus within the group.

  • Sara disparaging you to Girl 3 was a way for her to increase her status within the group, to potentially become the new mother hen.

  • The three girls laughing at your expense are just damage-control to solidify the group.

The bottom line is not that "Sara is a stupid person". This is just your gut reaction of having someone backstabbing you. What you don't realize is that it's not personal at all. Women are going to woman. Your involvement in this was jeopardizing the group so they had to gang up on you to maintain it.

The bottom line is just don't get involved in female social politics. There is absolutely nothing to gain, and you're more likely than not to get burned as you just illustrated.

7 upvotesCryxtalix2 years ago

So what should be the overall best way to act in that situation? Avoid getting involved whenever possible, but since OP is already at the table, it's worse off to not talk at all right?

35 upvotesDocbear642 years ago

Just let the cunt call the stupid bitch a stupid bitch . If stupid bitch was bothered enough to fight back then she would . Everyone else knows she's a stupid bitch and she probably even accepts the stupid bitch role in the group . Ultimately this is a no-win scenario for a man . Women friendships are fickle anyway OP just jeopardized what semblance of a female circle Stupid bitch had in this scenario .

They don't work like us guys do where your awkward friend getting picked on all night is kind of fucked up and you choose to stick up for him . With dudes it's a matter of " why are you making him uncomfortable he's just having a good time" . For women there's a status dynamic at play in it as well .

3 upvotesMagnetosis2 years ago

I think calling her out is fine too. I think to some extent it show status because you don't want shitty/negative behaviour around you. I think shutting down the mother hen character can show control over the situation as well if done right. At least for me being in a group with somebody behaving like that is super lame. As long as you're prepared to walk away and not get dragged down into the mud with the asshat and aren't surprised by the outcome if it turns out the person you stuck up for falls back in line when you leave it's whatever. I think it also depends on how you call her out, read the room. Given it's a bar I think the best idea (assuming you want to address it) is to call her out half as a joke but half serious. Don't kill the vibe by having a stick up your arse about it but at the same time make sure it's clear that you won't be tolerating this behaviour while you're there.

3 upvotesprojects_dude2 years ago

One thing that's going unnoticed, is he tagged along and is there with stupid. Had he been girl 3's friend or mother hen's, cool say nothing cause it's not your problem.

Frankly had he remained just a quiet pompous witness to Cunt's bullshit behavior, I'm not sure girl 3 would even want to talk with him.

2 upvotesfromthecrypt82 years ago

What then would be the best way to deal with the potential «Why didnt you stick up for me earlier?» when they get home? Let’s say OP was Sara’s boyfriend.

11 upvotesDocbear642 years ago

Women almost never ask men to stick up for them when it comes to other women unless she wants her boyfriend to fight the other girls boyfriend . Honestly I don't know what the right move in this scenario is , who invites a cunt out to drink who talks shit to their face ?

In a situation like that the winning move is probably just not to cavort with rude bitches.

6 upvotesxenongamer43512 years ago

Honestly the only move would be to flip the dynamic and say “Why do you even hang out with her if she makes you feel bad?” And maybe even play dumb and act like you thought it was just overly aggressive playful banter that you didn’t think twice about.

I feel for OP because I really don’t think he did anything white knighty or even cringy, so I think the best response to this situation is unfortunately to play dumb the first time and wait for someone to force your hand. You’re going to look like you have a stick up your ass if you step in in that moment and find out its a joke. I don’t think OPs situation was a joke, but I’m just saying this in case someone reads this and encounters a similar scenario.

0 upvotesRedpiller772 years ago

"Because it was funny, bitch". (?)

9 upvotesLukesLikeIt2 years ago

Put cunt in her place by teasing her but don’t involve Sara at all. She’s trying to assert her dominance in front of a new guy. If he wanted to knock her down a peg then do it but his mistake was being to blunt and obvious it was to protect Sara. But fuck that he should have shut her down for being a bitch in general not just to one person.

6 upvotesAuvergnat2 years ago

You don't have to get involved. Just engage your buddy on a complete different topic.

4 upvotesbeginner_2 years ago

The best thing is not to get in this situation. One could argue OP failed already when the left there current place to go to them instead of vice-versa.

1 upvotesLeftHello2 years ago

The boyfriend should have been the one to defend his girlfriend if anything

1 upvotesThotwrecker2 years ago

The best way is to have fun with the dynamic. In this case OP was trying to fuck on girl 3. Girl 3 is probably somewhere between Sarah and Cunt in terms of status. By simply busting on girl 3 and having a fun vibe with her, Cunt will immediately try to react to the attention going towards a new lower status girl. Which gives you all the power. Specifically if you're all in a set like at a table or at a bar where you can't break off girl 3, then you're best bet is to tilt your body language away and seem a little disengaged, especially relative to the hottest girl - be closed and leaned away from her. But socially you have fun and bust on whoever - do not show overeagerness to "be in on the joke".

19 upvotesreddishworm2 years ago

Had a friendly talk with female coworker Amy on the subject of fitness. She would then start gossipping about female coworker Carol, Carol's sleep pattern and how Carol usually only sleeps four hours per night.

Some time before that, Amy told me how she hates people who gossip so I decide to throw her under the bus when Carol arrived.

"Hey Carol, Amy just told me how she deprecates that you only sleep so little. Amy said you only sleep around four hours. You should know better."

Indignant facial expression on Carol. Amy replies with "You ass! I only said she slept four hours *yesterday*. And it's only because she's working so hard!"

After which Carol added "You really are an ass! <Insert five sentences of dumb hamstering>."

I go "WTF! Carol I'm on your side!" Both chicks laughed and ignored me for the rest of the day.

I second: Don't mess with the female hive mind.

74 upvotesSuperCrazy072 years ago

I decide to throw her under the bus when Carol arrived.

So, you decided to start drama at work with no upside for you?

37 upvoteswhimsyNena2 years ago

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I agree avoiding the complex social relationships involving groups of women is best.

5 upvotesmp1112 years ago

Anticipated a shit eating grin, probs

22 upvotesJD423052 years ago

It's not really about female anything. You tattled on someone, that's just poor social awareness on your part. If someone is talking badly about another outside the room, you calling them out in front of both parties is being very confrontational and dramatic.

11 upvotesPpppap2 years ago

They are right. You are autistic and an asshole. Do the same to a male (not in a close knit friend group) and I am pretty sure you are invisible to him from now on.

Do this to your boss, even worst consequences.

2 upvotesreddishworm2 years ago

Regardless of you shaming me, the point of my post is not to demonstrate my degree of Asperger's but rather to show how Carol decided to side with Amy and throw me under the bus, despite my effort to reveal that Amy is a backstabber.

/u/Auvergnat and /u/SuperCrazy07 are right: It was stupidly getting involved in the complex politics of the female social matrix with no upside for me.

2 upvotesThotwrecker2 years ago

This wouldn't get you very far with dudes either - guys will just think you're a weaselly little autist who can't real social situations. The lesson from that isn't "don't mess with the female hive mind" its don't be so eager for a little social validation that you throw someone under the bus, and make them feel like an idiot for thinking you were worth talking to about anything.

What was the plan, Carol is indebted to you for revealing Amy's backstabbing ways so Carol dumps her long time work friendship with Amy and rides away on your dick? The issue is that you communicated a massive need for validation and a lack of social intelligence, it has nothing to do with female hive mind

1 upvotesreddishworm2 years ago

communicated a massive need for validation and a lack of social intelligence

Any book recommendation to fix that?

2 upvoteswiseclockcounter2 years ago

You say he got burned, but did he really? They may throw him under the bus for the sake of their own hierarchy, but his disregard for their reaction probably bumped him up a notch in each of their minds even if they won't admit it to each other. I feel like so long as OP didn't exhibit any butt-hurt about the whole thing and remained cool-headed, the interaction will probably be a net positive in the long run. (not that he would be interested in any of them to begin with)

2 upvotesexit_sandman2 years ago

Let's be clear here. White-knighting is "defending a woman usually from men in the more or less conscious hope that you'll get rewarded with sex". What you did here is not as much white-knighting as stupidly getting involved in the complex politics of the female social matrix.

Thanks, you just saved me the time to write that out.

1 upvotesFinallyRed2 years ago

Yeah repairing the collective chill OP disrupted with a laugh at his expense is very different than say a guy failing to disrupt an instance of sexual escalation and being laughed at by the girl in confidence to the guy who seduced her. That is the kind of genuine disdain you never want to gain, especially in pursuit of what you perceive as the good of some chick.

1 upvotesSPREAD_THE_LOVE_77912 years ago

How this isn't the most upvoted comment is beyond me.

3 upvotesOverkillengine2 years ago

Feeeeeeeeeeelings.

That's it. Dudes are not immune to letting their feelings in the now guide their decisions instead of taking a step back and compartmentalizing just long enough to realize how stupid getting in involved in situations like this can be especially when there is no probable positive outcome.

Human nature is natural. It is also sometimes incredibly stupid.

1 upvotespt52 years ago

That link... that is one of the most amazing things I’ve ever read. Omg.

1 upvotesTrowawayantifap282 years ago

Omg you nailed it so well. I love you write up!

-3 upvotesIdoNtEvEnWaTz2 years ago

My brain hurts from reading that article

5 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Put your glasses back on then.

0 upvotesEzaar2 years ago

Do you insight as to understand this social dynamic? Or is this from investigation through personal experience?

3 upvotesAuvergnat2 years ago

As with everything red pill, I discovered on the Manosphere that simple and logic framework that explains a host of female phenomena that I had personally experienced but never understood.

1 upvotesEzaar2 years ago

Thanks. If there was some reading to be had with the context of female socializing, I’d be interested. A foundation for identification would be helpful aside from having a psychology degree lol.

135 upvotesVasiliyZaitzev2 years ago

Yep: Women actually loathe white knights

I am also very particular about who I decide to be an unpaid porter or bodyguard for. If a woman isn't my girl or my kin, then she's not my problem.

And fuck sticking up for the "little guy". They will turn on you in a heartbeat if it suits them. "Men are like spiders - it's the small ones that are poisonous."

19 upvotesJames_Rustler_2 years ago

Exactly, there's a reason that rapists are the weakest men, it's because they have no societal power so they resort to their only source of influence, physical strength. A harmless man isn't necessarily a good man, he just doesn't have a means of self expression or influence.

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Clever-ass name. Sell it to me. I'll give 50 times the money reddit makes a day in profit.

So $80 for it?

1 upvotesJames_Rustler_2 years ago

Hah. I make $40 a month, so it's worth 22x40 to me. But I can't sell it to ya, I like too much.

36 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

This, 100%.

I knew that, too -- I was just liquored up and off my game. #neveragain

21 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I think there is a way to call out C-Word if you use the right amount of humour. Turn a social situation serious and create tension and that is the result you will always get whether is a work function, gathering with friends or even the person next to you on the airplane. You can call the bitch out but make it funny, something like "is she your life coach" or any offhand comment instead of a super serious "you know, I don't think you are treating her well" which just ruins the mood

6 upvotesMarcosDomingues2 years ago

This. OP probably pointed it out in an autistic manner

3 upvoteshawkeaglejesus2 years ago

Overt communication never works. Gotta power talk your way with women to get your message across.

85 upvotesCapnPoot2 years ago

This might be the unpopular opinion, but I don’t think you “white-knighted” her. That girl was being a bitch, and you put her in her place.

10/10 would be your friend.

7 upvotesBuddhistSC2 years ago

100% agree. I personally wouldn't care how Sara feels, but I'd still feel inclined to tell Cunt that her behavior makes the situation less enjoyable for everyone involved and that I feel embarrassed being near her.

If they make fun of me for that then oh well. Why spend your time with people like that?

If you weren't there with your friend, you could have communicated all of that with body language and by simply walking away.

2 upvoteshawkeaglejesus2 years ago

That's the key. By making it Sara vs Cunt, OP put himself in the middle of their relationship. Making it Cunt vs Group having a good time would've socially shamed her, and one thing women can't stand is being socially shamed or being painted as the disrupter of everyone's good vibe.

Just something simple like, "You're so negative, it's really killing my buzz. Is she always like this?" Leave the relationship between Sara and Cunt out of it.

"A man is shamed by being openly ridiculed and rejected. It requires an audience."

2 upvotesBuddhistSC2 years ago

That's a good distinction to make. Defending Sara vs. disparaging Cunt.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Not really... she was calling her friend a moron and obviously he doesn't know how they usually talk to each other. To call a girl a bitch straight to her face is just not an appropriate move in that situation.

14 upvotesBirdManBrrrr2 years ago

I had the same thought; could argue defending some other dude's girl isn't his place but shitty behavior is shitty behavior and letting some dumb cunt ruin the night isn't cool either.

13 upvotesNibblyPig2 years ago

I agree, if he kept frame at the end and treated it as a group shit test he'd come out on top. Outcome independence is hot. So is speaking your mind.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Also mother hen was trying to place a relationship with the white knight and the useful follower who was deserving of a scrap of food. You are the scrap.

She saw you were alpha and wanted to show you how she could make the other women dance on the tips of her wagging fingers even with abuse. She was strutting her power. Attempting to hit on you. If you reinforced her dominion over them, you would have had panty access to all of them. From the alpha woman for being alpha, and the beta woman for being alpha. You messed up when you turned beta. Then neither the alpha wants, nor the beta wants.

This is why they say women accidentally destroy civilization. She is tearing at the social constructs of people treating each other with respect and due process. Its chapter 1 of the bible. God made eve, and her first order of business was to immediately fuck up the beautiful relationship structure with drama and hatred. Then immediately all the garbage became everyone elses problem.

Stay true to your sensibilities, they are the origin of civilization itself. Without you, men are only turd flinging apes.

2 upvotesDontYouTrustMe2 years ago

Agreed, but better to not be involved in the future

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Agreed. White knights are too beta to call out a woman like OP did. White knights only protect women from men they don’t call out other women.

-6 upvotesMetalgear2222 years ago

It's actually not a matter of opinion. It was white-knighting. He spoke on her behalf to get the person to quit behaving "negatively" towards her. That's copy-paste definition of white-knight.

You didn't know? I thought everyone here knew.. Don't Save Her

19 upvotesyuube2 years ago

Lol cut the bullshit, context matters. Are you a white knight if you stopped a dude from killing an unconscious chick cause you spoke on her behalf?

White knighting is when a guy defends women and all kinds of positions often times even situations he knows is morally wrong or even situations that he doesn’t care about to try and have some inkling of sexual activity because he is a loser. You can generally feel the fake outrage, weak mental state, and desperation and it’s rather sickening.

Calling out a woman for being a bitch( which alone is something a white knight would not do because they are pussies and don’t want to upset other women unless there are a lot of women who also hate that woman) is not white knighting. It’s alpha as fuck, in fact the only beta thing about this post is that he regrets saying something to the bitch. If she was actually being a bitch then stand by your fucking stance and don’t falter because a couple of her friends talked shit about you after.

8 upvotesMetalgear2222 years ago

I'm cutting right through his and yours. It's not his place, if he doesn't like the bitch, just go talk to other people at the bar. A shake of your head and walking away to talk to other people when she's being a cunt is infinitely more powerful than confronting her on it. Just reread the example above. It was a lose/lose. He scarred his reputation in that circle and she apologized for his behavior. Then they shared a laugh at it. Don't rationalize that it was "the right move" or that he was "asserting himself for her", even OP accepts that it was dumb and not to make that mistake again. Learn from him and move on. End of story.

7 upvotesyuube2 years ago

You are both coming from a place of weakness to decide you were white knighting.

1) 3 girls including the one girl he called out is a weak ass social circle, stop fretting over a few fucking girls. Go out and meet some less bitchy women, for fucks sake, “ his reputation is scarred” I guess if you live in a town of seven and they don’t like you being a man. Not caring about losing shitty people in your life is manliness.

That goes to say, was she actually being a toxic buzz kill or was OP actually out of line. If he made something out of nothing and was just stirring drama then that is pretty beta. You can’t just spout off like an idiot.

8 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I've read a couple of your posts-

What you're not getting is this young lady in the story has made the decision to associate with these individuals.

This White Knight is attempting to make judgements and decisions for a girl he's not even fucking.

Your analogy about some unconscious girl being killed by a dude is retarded and ridiculous- nobody's life was threatened here. He opened his mouth when he should've minded his own business, nobody's life was in danger here.

If I see some random person on the street who just so happens to have a vagina get mugged in front of me, I'm getting to step in and have a word.

If it's some a girl who has made the decision to get involved with individuals who have an established history of being verbally or physically abusive, fuck them. They have two good feet to walk away and they have their own mouth to speak their piece.

In either case, the fact that the person has a vagina shouldn't be a factor. If you don't like something that's going on, remove yourself from the scenario unless you have some skin in the game yourself.

Eventually, the OP will need to learn to keep his mouth shut before opening his mouth and proving to everyone that he's an idiot. Reputation matters. You don't want to carry the label of White Knight.

0 upvotesyuube2 years ago

Are you a white knight if you stopped a dude from killing an unconscious chick cause you spoke on her behalf?

That was a bullshit fake scenario just to point out that you can’t live by a blanket term, you should have the rationality to know context matters, i pushes it to the edge of the what would still fit in the parent statement, I don’t think the blanket term below is an acceptable definition of being a white knight.

It was white-knighting. He spoke on her behalf to get the person to quit behaving "negatively" towards her.

There is much more to being a white knight, I thought about it deeply for a minute, I thought I summarized why I thought so harshly about white knights pretty well in a previous comment, but telling the truth was never one of those reasons. White knights, generally, have a backstabbing, snakey, fake persona associated with them in my eyes, partly because they seem to intentionally pander for attention and not be leaders, they are weak mentally and in character.

The way I see it, telling the truth is none of those, and fits into none of those categories, telling the truth is a sign of strength of character, unless as I stated before that the women in question wasn’t doing that much and op made too big a deal out of it,

To summarize, you can’t just go around like an idiot starting trouble everywhere you go just because something is true, at the same time, sometimes things need to be said, and it’s a sign of strength and character when they are, in this case, I think we are both looking at with the possible different scenarios in mind, neither of us were there so it’s hard to comment further.

1 upvotesTomHicks2 years ago

Are you a white knight if you stopped a dude from killing an unconscious chick cause you spoke on her behalf?

Unless you're a cop or otherwise legally obligated to intervene? Yes.

1 upvotesyuube2 years ago

No, see my follow up responses, telling the truth and not being mentally weak are not tenants of a white knight, the use of white knight in this thread has been horribly mutilated,

If youre not being a weak bitch trying to get a girl to like you cause you can’t any other way, you aren’t being a white knight.

7 upvotesCapnPoot2 years ago

Im not so sure about that. I consider white-knighting as helping a girl out in the subconscious hope of getting a peepee touch. This sounds like OP is just a cool dude who doesn’t like phaggots within his vicinity, and is able & willing to enforce such an environment. I have respect for that

3 upvotesMetalgear2222 years ago

my comment was more directed on the justifying the action than it was the correct definition of white knighting.

1 upvotesSubbs2 years ago

Feel like intent should also matter though. If he spoke out solely because the cunt was being a cunt and it pissed him off, I see no harm in that.

7 upvotesdynospectrum72 years ago

Seems like everyone who is attempting to unplug should experience this. Yes, women will appreciate the white knight in the moment, but that is just for the moment.

Example:

I'm with some of my friends at a bar, and I was going back and forth with some chick. From the jump, I never took her bullshit, never supplicated. And because she was drinking and naturally emotional, she started crying over some BS I forget. So a friend of mine walks in and sees this. I tell my homie not to worry about her, but its a vagina so he brushes me off (a little more aggressive and thirsty than I cared for), then goes to brush her tears away.

Anyways, she eventually gets out of her feelings and comes back to talk to me, sharing her food in the process. Right on queue, my friend sits at the table to join us and tries to crack a joke. And of course the bitch absolutely let loose on him. Shitting on his looks, clothes, personality, weight, hair, telling him to go sit at a different chair, you name it. Shit got to the point where I had to dog myself to get the attention off of him. Dude went from white knight to talking the same shit back to her in an instant.

For a moment, I thought it was one of those shit-tests for him but no, the way he set the tone was all fucked up. Dude came in like a jellyfish and she saw him as such.

They don't respect you (as a man they want to fuck) when you step to them like a bitch, so don't do it.

Hope that all made sense, I'm all over the place today.

3 upvotesRedditorFor1OYears2 years ago

Lol. I followed most of it, except the jellyfish metaphor.

5 upvoteshawkeaglejesus2 years ago

jellyfish have no vertebrae, the friend was acting spineless

3 upvotesKeanu_X2 years ago

"dog myself" is not a term I'm familiar with

3 upvoteshawkeaglejesus2 years ago

make fun of yourself, OP tried using himself as the target to draw fire off his friend

2 upvotesAHumilationADay2 years ago

So, here's my question, how exactly did you react to her emotional outburst? Dismissively? Passive responses, active disinterest? I still haven't figured out how to handle this yet

17 upvotesHelpcalculus2 years ago

The bottom line is this: Sara is a stupid person.

Nope. The bottom line is you don't jump in when her boyfriend is there. It's disrespectful to him too. You are basically telling him "Bro, they are shitting on your girlfriend and you are doing nothing?"

Now, if your friend wasn't there and some dude was rude to Sarah, that's a different story.

6 upvotesVanityKings2 years ago

You lose when you argue. Amused mastery and an air of indifference are all you need

7 upvotesThotwrecker2 years ago

The problem here is NOT that you white knighted. The problem here is that you displayed your social incompetence by failing to identify the group dynamic and vibe with it.

For example, if the group dynamic is that Cunt is the queen bee and Sarah is the punching bag, then by stepping in and standing up for Sarah, you're showing you don't understand the social dynamic. They have a certain friend dynamic - it's kind of like if you're hanging out with black dudes and they call each other nigga and then you're like "whoa, guys, chill with the racism, OK, have some self respect it's february guys!".

It's not the white knighting - white knighting is terrible, but the issue here is social sense and social games. The "dump on Sarah" is a social game, to gain admittance to the game, you bust on Sara.

If Cunt shit tests you, you just say "whoa who do I look like, Sara, you watch your tone" in a fun, non-serious way. The issue is also tonal - they were probably talking in a non-serious shit tone, whereas you interpretted it literally and got butthurt about it, so you came in with a "Hey, guys, whoa, seriously" tone. Girls fucking hate it when they are having fun doing dumb shit and turning up, and then Mr. Responsible Guy tries to "real talk" about something, like careers or logistics.

2 upvotesLosingsteamfast2 years ago

Yeah this post reeks of spin. If we talked to the girls I'd bet 6 months pay they describe op as the awkward guy in the group.

16 upvotestemerarious2 years ago

I see nothing wrong with what you did. It didn't come across as you defending a woman in an attempt to get in her pants, so it wasn't really white knighting. You saw a bully and called her out. If that social group laughs at you for that, fuck them.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Calling a women a bitch for that women calling her friend a moron is a pretty bad move. If someone is being bullied or gained up on then you defend, but if it's one on one especially between friends then the other person obviously isn't bothered enough by it to care. It's like bringing out a weapon during an argument; it just raises the tension way too much.

4 upvotesBirdManBrrrr2 years ago

You were in a no-win situation: either the cunt dominates & ruins the night for everyone or you're the bad guy for interjecting into the female hierarchy. You probably could have used some cocky sarcasm or A&A to make your point and keep it light; you chose a more direct route. It's fine, live and learn.

Women will defend their own regardless of how shitty they're treated by their friends, family, etc. You're the outsider encroaching on the group dynamic; you're the bad guy, how dare you!

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

At least you learned form it, from the tone of this post. Realise that you can never be that kind of hero, because she doesn't want to be saved and because you'll be ridiculed for it

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I don't think you were really a 'white knight' here but you could have said less and been more effective. I've been in almost an identical situation and women will appreciate when you challenge their 'queen bee' when she is being rude or belittling. Next time just give her a disgusted look and ask: that's how you speak to your friends?

Same for guys, if the alpha is being disrespectful and no one in the group will stand up and you do, they will appreciate you for it. And hopefully learn. Thing is being an outsider you don't want to take it too far. Subtlety can really help you.

3 upvotesCryxtalix2 years ago

I think you are missing the point. By how hard sara tried to make amends with c-word after OP defended her, it's pretty obvious sara has the intention of getting on c-word's good side in the first place.

Any sort of defense is detrimental to sara's intention of being good with c-word. Her plan was to sit and endure the shit so as not to upset c-word. Giving a disgusted look would mess with her plans all the same.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Yeah after rereading I see what you mean. As a guy it's definitely best to stay out of women's friendship politics. Not your people and not your problem.

Best to save your ammo for when you need it.

1 upvotesTRPalexmehr2 years ago

I'm not sure I agree. You can choose to use your social clout to put Cunt down. But you should do it in a lowkey, lighthearted and fun way.

Great way to establish your dominance and maintain a happy social dynamic. Everyone will want to follow you because you are a good leader.

However, if you were trying to game Cunt, I'm not sure how she would react. Get turned on because you took control of the situation and lightly teased her? Or get angry and resentful for ruining her fun.

4 upvotesSir_Distic2 years ago

You should have used Amused Mastery. Being more playful and not insulting. Or just stay out of it. As long as she wasn't insulting you or your friend.

3 upvotesIvabighairy12 years ago

AWALT! This happened to me EVERY time, that's why I don't do stuff like this anymore. It's one thing to have a male friends back, but don't do it for a female. You WILL pay for it.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Never defend a girl from her friend. She doesn't need it, and especially don't call that friend a bitch... it just makes you the bad guy and for good reason.

5 upvotesTheDevilsAdvokaat2 years ago

You're right, should have stayed quiet.

She spends more time with c-word than you. So even though you were probably right from the sound of it, she decided she'd use you as a "social sacrifice" so she could be all pally with c-word again - and maybe cop less shit from her too.

She is stupid.

6 upvotesenkae73172 years ago

Props to your buddy. He stuck up for you. But yeah, never be a white knight. I've done that, been there.

I was talking to some girls about how her bf is abusive and she deserves better. Ugh, makes me sick thinking about it now. But the good thing is that you learn. Always be improving and becoming a better version of yourself.

1 upvotesTheLaughingRhino2 years ago

If you think someone is being a bitch and want to call them a bitch in public ( Obviously NOT at work or a work situation...), then do it.

If you feel something is the right thing to do, and part of your "code" (Every man needs a "code" to live by), then do it. Fuck anyone who has a problem with it.

But people will laugh at you! It's not ALPHA! You won't get laid for that, you need to lift more!

Fuck all that noise. ABUNDANCE means pussy is everywhere. If you lose out on one or two pieces of pussy because you needed to reach into the toolbox and lay someone out with your fists, then so be it.

Every man needs a "code" Sometimes living by your "code" will cost you something Not living by your "code" will eventually cost you EVERYTHING

IDGAF means I Don't Give A Fuck If you want to say it, then say it, don't give a fuck.

The lesson here is NOT to keep your mouth shut. The lesson here to avoid shit like this is to better calibrate the kind of people you choose to be around. These people sound like low quality assholes. Maybe one or two of them was smoking hot. OK, so the fuck what. ABUNDANCE says so what. Plenty of hot chicks in the world. They are all replaceable.

You'll see it out there if you look closely. There are some truly worthless asshole people out there. And while they might open their fat fucking mouths and say stupid shit around some people ( people they don't fear), they won't around others. They instinctively understand - THIS IS GOING TO COST ME.

This is not about running around trying to intimidate people. It's about people understanding your vibe, which calibrates to - Everything you try to do that's being a dickhead is going to cost you.

This is the matrix under which people decide not to fuck with you

  1. I don't know what he will do. I just don't know. He's unpredicatable

  2. All I know is I won't like it. It's gonna cost me

  3. He won't negotiate. Once he's made up his mind, that's it. He's going to never relent in making it cost me.

I remember one of the most vivid experiences of my life. It was some random ass school talent performance. Because it was a school full of dickheads, people smirked and no one clapped. Except one person. Stood up and clapped. Alone. They liked it. It was enough for them. Fuck everyone else.

If you think it's right to stand up for others, do it. If you think it's right to not stand up for others, then do that instead. It matters less about your choice and more about your choices BEING TRUE TO YOU AS A PERSON, TO YOUR CODE OF HOW YOU CHOOSE TO ENGAGE THE WORLD.

Find your own code. Hang out with a better class of people. Use sunscreen. Buy a new shirt. Don't date hairdressers. There, enough good life advice to last you another ten years.

7 upvotesHuGiEnormous2 years ago

This isn’t being a white night. This is being a decent person. I would have done the same.

Just because they’re all shitty people don’t let it deter you from being decent in the future

3 upvotesRedditorFor1OYears2 years ago

Out of curiosity, how do you define white-knighting? This seems like a pretty clear example to me.

6 upvotesHuGiEnormous2 years ago

Doing something similar in the hope that youll get laid, or to make a girl like you.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Yeah calling a girl bitch to her face is really being a decent person. Defiantly no better ways to handle that situation

3 upvotesjimmyb2072 years ago

"C-word"?...you're still B-pill. The girl is a cunt. Say the fucking word...Cunt. Feel your Balls hanging between your legs... don't be ashamed of it.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Ha, I honestly just wasn’t sure if that word would get me reddit flagged... cunt cunt cunt. There.

2 upvotesSaiyandeus2 years ago

I think what you did was completely fine. You were uncomfortable with how Sara was being treated, and you let her friend have a piece of your mind. You may have been white knighting Sara, but was that the intention or just a by product of you expressing your belief about how people should treat their friends? I think what you did showed character, and girl 3 probably respects you for it even though she laughed along with her friends later on. Maybe I'm not red pilled enough. If so, please tell me where I'm wrong.

2 upvotesThrowtheknightaway2 years ago

Review the 48 laws of power. C-Word was the head of the group with how she treated Sara. Sara was being smart and not outshining the master. Let C-Word do her thing but don't let her think she can do it to you. That's what matters. If you want to save a friend from someone like that, make it so that you're the center of her world

2 upvotesplascra2 years ago

Dude, girl cliques are stupid where typical logic doesn't apply. You are still green.

 

Sara knew her place in the clique, and to stay in that clique... you get it?

Consensus is the keyword in girl cliques, even if at the wrong end. That's how they are wired. Crabs in bucket thats what they are.

2 upvoteslorum_ipsum_dolor2 years ago

Rule 4 - Always Say Less Than Necessary

2 upvotesChadTheWaiter1002 years ago

The bottom line brother, and I’m sure I’ll be downvotes bc people will not understand what I mean, is that you need to continue improving yourself. If you were at the point where you needed to be you would have fucked girl number 3 and C-word and you wouldn’t be concerned with them “having a laugh at your expense”.

Btw, I’m not saying this to insult you, this is constructive criticism.

2 upvotesCompeliminator2 years ago

I think you did fine. Call thebitch out on her shitty behavior and then not give a shit what they say or whether they like it.

3 upvotesTunedtoPerfection2 years ago

Sara is actually pretty socially intelligent.

Look the 2nd worse way to combat a social bully like that is to "stand up for yourself". The first, is have someone else do it for you. All it does is make the bully want to bully you more aggressively the second you are away from the person who stood up to them. Sara knew this, that is why she said nothing when you did it and then apologized for your actions the second you were out of earshot. Sara knew what you did would only make her situation worse if she tried to capitalize it.

You on the other hand, in this moment, had the social intelligence of a 2 year old. Lesson learned: "Never meddle in this affairs of women's social order."

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

It goes a bit beyond the precinct of white-knighting and female behaviour.

Nearly all people will remind you with their reactions that no good deed goes unpunished, but cretins will do so in an outstanding way.

The bottom line is this: Sara is a stupid person. And when she was being treated like a stupid person, I should have kept my mouth shut.

Indeed. There's the trope that they'll resent you for underrating them. When the truth is, they'll resent you for overrating them. If you treat an irresponsible (or stupid, or whatever) as something more than he/she is, they'll unconsciously feel their inadequacy, feel as if you are demanding of them more than anyone should, and develop hostility toward you.

** Never try to part slaves from their masters (pecked from the peckers, in a pecking order): it's the best way to experience the anger of the former in its most powerful flavor.

2 upvotescharliechucksuck2 years ago

Hmm man idk if that was so beta if you fucking own not being liked. Or don’t give a fuck what they think you

2 upvoteslegitniga2 years ago

I don’t think you did anything wrong man. You weren’t white-knighting to impress anyone, you were just legitimately defending a “friend.” Sara is probably just a moron and attacked you to make things less awkward with her friend.

1 upvotesdrkinferno722 years ago

Unless you've been knighted by the king to fight the saracens. Don't white knight anyone, chivalry is dead.

1 upvotesthrowawaydefriended2 years ago

Not really white knighting - white knighting isn't necessarily about defending a woman, but more about attempting to one-up other men by doing so.

Even though Sara isn't your "friend" necessarily, I got more of a vibe of what's described in the thread below this one about "standing up to friends in the face of disrespect" (not gonna link it, I did but didn't realize that linking within here also gets filtered but it's right below this one). This wasn't about trying to impress Sara or trying to make any impression. But rather standing up to someone being a bitch and putting her in her place.

Though to be fair it is possible you may have been perceived by them as "trying to look like a hero" which I guess is something to be wary of, but no, this was a completely genuine reaction to C's behavior actually pissing you off. For a white knight it would be an "opportunity".

1 upvotesGeeMunz112 years ago

I'm curious. OP, after reading everyone's comments, would you do this again?

Personally I would. Gotta call people out for being cunts regardless of gender.

1 upvotesCulturalWishbone2 years ago

Look, guys understand the value of an ally. They need to understand it because men evolved in a hostile dangerous world. You might not like the guy your hunting with but you either learn to work together or your die.

Women can just squabble with each other with no real consequences.

1 upvotesBillSander2 years ago

Some pretty good analysis of this post. I agree with the posts and info them. Good opportunity to sneak a peek into female group dynamics.

1 upvotesredd_reality2 years ago

See, the way you explained the situation, OP, is that you stood up for someone when she was clearly being kicked around for no reason.

That, in and of itself, is what most normal people would do, to a reasonable degree.

What white knighting is, is going above and beyond in support of a woman because you believe it'll gain you favor with her. It is a covert contract.

The fall out you experienced isn't because the situation went down like you described it, but because you went well above and beyond into sucking up territory. Women are very good at differentiating the two. Next time, describe your white knighting more honestly, so people don't confuse it for sticking up for the victim in an obvious bully situation.

1 upvotesswaglordobama2 years ago

There is a difference between being a white knight and being a man of integrity and discipline.

If I saw someone disrespecting another person like that for no reason I would do the same and call them out. It's shitty behavior and it should be called out. Not everything is about getting laid. You have to have boundaries for what kind of people you allow in your life and what kind of behavior you accept from others. I would not hang out with anyone who treats their friends that way. I wouldn't give a shit what they think of me, either.

Also the dynamics at play are very much that your boy's girlfriend is the leader's bitch and values the leader's opinion of herself over her own, like that dorky kid who wants to get in with the popular kids at school, so he puts up with a lot of hazing and self deprecation thinking it's going to get them to like him.

Anyway, don't feel wrong about your choice. Own it. Couple of girls don't like you because you didn't compromise your integrity? Good riddance.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I don’t think I even consider this being a white knight. You made one comment about another girls shitty behavior which isn’t too bad.

1 upvotesStrayEnglishman2 years ago

I think everyone has their blue pill moments as we’re all only human beings with flaws. But as somebody said, disrupting that female social matrix just isn’t wise; no matter how soyboy one gets, you’ll always make a shitty excuse for a woman, so it’s better not to get involved in woman shit. Women are always going to be more loyal to other women. Men are disposable to them.

1 upvotesTheeAlligatorr2 years ago

You saw something. You called it. Sara is the fucking idiot in the situation

1 upvotesEnigma2212 years ago

typical female-ape hierarchy

1 upvotescorystereo2 years ago

I did worse a few years ago. A crazy black lady in Bryant Park was shouting at some "4" who happened to be a White female, and I piped up to the crazy lady "Can you just leave her alone?"

The crazy lady immediately gets in my face and goes: "She's my sista and she owes me monay! She needs to learn respect!" As she says the last word, she slaps Ms. "4" in the back of the head.

Although I'm embarrassed that I was such a queer back then (this was 5 years ago, and I had just graduated college, mind you) the memory of that slap almost makes it worth it because I'm chuckling as I write out that part--it wouldn't have happened had I kept my mouth shut.

I can't believe I thought I was a gentleman; I could have easily been stabbed! Needless to say, these days I keep my mouth shut when situations like that arise--whether it be a male or female getting in trouble. I'd advise anyone reading this to do the same.

1 upvotesMagnumBurrito2 years ago

Stop giving so much thought to these girls opinions. They all sound like dipshits.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

But that night, one of Sara's girlfriends (let's call her C-Word) was being extremely belittling to her in front of us -- dismissing everything Sara said, calling her a moron in a non-joking way, etc. I was drunk and thought I'd stick up for my friend's girlfriend.

Why the fuck would you stick up for a moron, when someone is treating them like a moron? She IS a moron, by your own admission.

That's like defending a fat person from being call fat.

It turns out, the second I left, Sara apologized to C-Word for my behavior. Not only that, Sara turned to Girl 3 and said "I just feel sorry for you... YOU had to talk to him all night."

See, this is what you get. You might be as dumb as Sara. Enjoy the fruits of your labor.

1 upvotesgorebwn2 years ago

We all have hiccups man. Don't sweat it.

1 upvotesJacob_exe2 years ago

you called someone out on their bullshit, and deep down I dont think you did it to “white knight” sara I think you did cause it made you feel awkward she was being such a dick

regardless, just know in the future when you call someone out especially the friend of someone stupid dont expect a “you know what I was wrong”, expect an equally stupid response

1 upvotes7mile_2 years ago

Bro let's face it. That wasn't the reason for it.. you were probably sloppy drunk. Stay sober when you're out and you'll make better decisions.

1 upvotesChahhhles2 years ago

To be for real if you wanted to shut C-Word's pie hole all you had to do was start clapping at C-Word. You shifted the energy in the event which is a no-no. So fail there.

I mean Sara was getting roasted but the correct thing to do was flip it on C-Word with a well timed jab to keep the laughs rolling, and potentially steer the conversation, if everyone else in the convo was in fact laughing. Reading the room in the proper context is important frand.

In my experience everyone already knows shit like that is dumb but no one usually can come up with anything quickly that would be cool to ameliorate the situation with so they stfu and let it pass i.e. that awkward silence after.

Edit: nvm

1 upvotesgardn1982 years ago

Us women are complicated creatures and I would never expect a man to understand or follow our twisted logic sometimes. I'm sure she secretly DID appreciate it, but had to save face to her friend, unfortunately at your expense.

I have a recent similar example, I just went on a cruise with a bunch of gfs and I madeout with this guy I had been eying the first couple days. Well, he was pretty forward and kept asking me to have sex with him multiple times after I kept saying no. I told this to my friends but it wasn't a HUGE deal. The next day, we run into him and my friend, unprompted by me, BITCHED him out. I was so embarassed and profusely apologized to him. I kept telling her to stop but she wouldn't.

Now, I man would think she had my best interest at heart. But that's not how women think

My gut instinct told me she was just jealous and trying to cockblock me from hooking up with him again. Fucked, i know. But she's done things like this to me before. How's that for a mindfuck?

1 upvotesAttractos2 years ago

Some bitches care more about staying in their social circle then having dignity and self worth.

1 upvotesJeNeSaitQuoi2 years ago

I agree with the others that there can be incomprehensible undercurrents among social circles and this explains why squirreldentist's experience.

I'd like to point out that one can express disapproval through non verbal communication. That is avoiding eye contact; physically moving away or turning away from the offensive person; pretending not to hear them and so on. People who have mastered the glare or the raised eyebrow are ahead of the game.

The beauty of non verbal communication are: Plausible deniability. People can turn away or not hear something so anyone trying to accuse someone of mistreatment / disrespect has an uphill battle. Sara in this scenario may not have noticed or could pretend that she didn't notice if she were called on. And so can anyone else. This has an isolating effect on the person to whom the dismissiveness was directed.

1 upvotesjizzledfreq2 years ago

Can confirm, was white knight for a co-worker friend who kept branch swinging back and forth between abusive men. We had unspectacular sex one night when one of her fuck boys didnt come through.

 

Was emotional tampon, and last november rolled my car, lost all my shit in it, and racked up a $1100 tow bill. She got on a greyhound that night and left me to deal with everything.

 

Fast forward to now, she relapsed on meth, is hoing around for alcohol & drugs, sucking her moms ex boyfriends dick for free tattoos, and I haven't heard from her in months despite being her "best friend". Her still in contact with both of her abusers.

I white knighted, I tried to save a no, I fell on my sword and nearly died. But at least I can admit my fuck up and move on...

1 upvotesPaulRocker2 years ago

at this point I just want to make my music and smoke my weed. two things that will never let you down.

honestly, fuck a relationship

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

"A couple of nights ago, my friend and I were out drinking. He gets a text from his girlfriend that she and some female friends are at a bar down the street. I'm always game to meet some new chicks, so we head right over."

You disobeyed Law 8: Make other people come to you; use bait if necessary. That's the first wrong step you made. And then the second wrong turn was being a white knight.

1 upvotesAndgelyo2 years ago

TIL dumb hoe is a dumb hoe with all her friends. What else is new.

0 upvoteskiwi_like_me2 years ago

Good. Now go cut your dick off.

White knighting is despicable behaviour.

-1 upvotesterraformers82 years ago

I just don't care how females treat each other. If it's not some situation that I absolutely have to sort out than why bother. This is absolutely a display of the female pecking order. It's a bit odd to insert yourself into a situation like that involving your buddy's girl. It does seem alittle bit like white knighting. Why else would you do such a thing, there is absolutely no upside to it. Zero. Unless you are attracted to Sara and you were trying to file some kind of brownie points away for future use. That's how it looks form the outside, anyway.

0 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Honestly, to me, this is just sad!!! You use the words bitch, c-word and call her stupid. Sounds to me like you just weren't aware of the situation so you're making an excuse to make yourself feel better!!

0 upvotesScandinavianredpill2 years ago

You are are an uptight dude. wasting time around retarded chicks with an IQ of 80. if you want to be anything else, dissociate from people like those. Sara does that out of low self esteem and the rest are just being bitchy and seeing if any guy will push back lighly but fun at them so they can smear him in pussy.

You are clearly overreacting.

0 upvotespresto_manifesto2 years ago

You got owned, and it won't be the last time.

0 upvotesLosingsteamfast2 years ago

Tldr - op can't read social situations. He got drunk and made an ass of himself by trying to save a girl from normal banter. Then instead of trying to figure out where he fucked up, he decided to get butt hurt and write a post about how everyone else is an idiot.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

...Huh?

Being drunk, I admitted I read the situation wrong. I posted it as an example of someone reacting to a situation wrong.

I haven't called anyone an idiot.

What are you talking about?

1 upvotesLosingsteamfast2 years ago

"I haven't called anyone an idiot"

Sure you did - and then some.

let's call her C-Word

Now, my friend's girlfriend (let's call her Sara) is an extremely stupid person. All of us in the group know this

The bottom line is this: Sara is a stupid person.

So Sara, C-Word and Girl 3 all had a laugh at my expense

Then

I admitted I read the situation wrong. I posted it as an example of someone reacting to a situation wrong.

No you didnt.

TL;DR: I stuck up for a friend's girlfriend... she mocked me for it behind my back.

You carefully crafted the narritive and tried to frame the story as "I was just being good guy doing the right thing for m'lady and they all turned on me for being such a good honorable guy!"

-1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I really think YOU'RE the stupid one. You call her the 'c-word' and you don't even know her. This IS NOT a white knight incident....this is you not understanding the situation.

-1 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

You cared so much to come here and write about it.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I think you’re really missing the point here...

-2 upvotesRedPilledRoaster2 years ago

Yeah don’t shite knight nothing new here

5 upvotesSir_Distic2 years ago

How does this comment add anything of value to the sub?

-12 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

Don't judge Sara, you're just as dumb

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I'm not posting this as a "follow my example." I'm posting this as a "look at the dumb thing I did."

7 upvotesRed_Faust2 years ago

sharing mistakes is useful for the community so that we all can learn from yours (and you, through writing it down, reinforce the lesson in your brain)

trolls who come and shame on people that share mistakes are incentivizing other posters to not share.

so thanks for sharing. and fuck trolls.

-9 upvotes • [deleted] • 2 years ago

I know, i just feel bad for Sara

1 upvotestallwheel2 years ago

Quit white-knighting for her.





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